Chapter 36 Dex - Past
thirty-six
Dex - Past
TREASURE AND INK.
I was late home from work again. Roy hadn’t mentioned the time I’d taken off, but I felt his eyes on me more than usual throughout the day.
It was his way of checking in. The grumpy bastard cared and didn’t know how to show that, but I appreciated it all the same.
I was honestly okay. Better than I had been in a long time.
Letting Jonah see that part of me no one ever had before had just entwined our lives deeper.
He was under my skin, deeper than my bones, in parts of me no light could reach but his.
I hated being apart from him, even for work.
I wanted him with me always. Wanted to know what he was doing, what he was feeling.
After my shift, I’d done more work on Jonah’s car.
It was almost ready for him. I’d also ordered what I needed to modify Delilah to carry a passenger more comfortably.
Those parts would arrive soon too, and between the bike and the car, there was no reason we’d have to go anywhere separately again, and Jonah wouldn’t have to stress his leg as much as he did.
I’d sent him a text on my lunch break, asking what he was up to, but he hadn’t responded. Knowing him, he might have been giving me the silent treatment for needing to leave him to go to work.
The house was dark when I arrived home, and the thought that he wasn’t here waiting for me felt even darker. I made my way inside, deciding to check that he wasn’t sleeping in my bed or something before I went out to hunt him down and bring him home.
The shower was running upstairs, and I breathed a sigh of relief, taking the stairs two at a time to get to the bathroom. I was surprised to find it dark as well.
“Rabbit?” I called out cautiously.
“Yeah?” Jonah answered softly.
“Why are you showering in the dark, baby?”
“I just… didn’t want to see it.”
I wondered if he meant his scars. I knew he hated when I paid any attention to them at all, but some days were worse for him than others. “Can I turn the light on?”
“You won’t like it.”
Alarm bells tolled in the back of my mind as I hit the light switch, the old bulb flickering in the ceiling before staying on, yellow-white light illuminating the tile and the clothes strewn over the floor covered in blood.
My heart stopped as I approached the shower, yanking the curtain back to find Jonah sitting on the floor, hugging his knees.
His cheek was bruised, but the water running off him was clear.
“Are you hurt?” I asked the most important question first.
He shook his head in response.
“Whose blood is that, baby?” I asked, speaking softly because he still wasn’t looking at me, and he needed me to be gentle with him despite the panic clawing up my ribcage.
Jonah turned slowly, brown eyes dulled of their usual flame until they locked with mine and life sparked once more in their empty depths. He smiled. “I got it back for you.”
My breathing came a little faster, the panic scratching, gnawing, clawing. “What did you get back?”
“All of it. It’s in the pocket.”
I turned slowly from him to my bloodied leather jacket on the bathroom floor. Reaching for it without leaving Jonah’s side, I pulled it over to us, my heart thumping rapidly as my fingers dipped into the pocket.
Heat prickled behind my eyes, blurring my vision even before I pulled the familiar-shaped items free from the leather. My keys, phone, wallet… and my father’s lighter.
“You got it back for me,” I whispered, words pulled from my weeping soul, from the wound that losing this piece of my father had left. I’d lost it, and my rabbit had brought it back to me.
I placed the items down, uncaring about my clothing getting wet as I stepped into the shower and sank to my knees in front of him. My arms held him as if I could pull him into me, into my core, so he could feel the way he soothed me without words. He held me back the same way.
Long minutes later, I reluctantly pulled back from him, smoothing his wet hair back from his face as I examined the bruise on his cheek.
He didn’t have any other injuries that I could see.
“You need to tell me what you did, Rabbit,” I told him, because if it was what I thought, then there was another body that I needed to stash away somewhere no one would ever find it.
“I stabbed him,” Jonah answered, eyes searching mine like he was lost at sea, drifting without an anchor, without a way back to solid ground.
“Okay,” I said simply, reaching for him, my soul seeking his in the darkness, trying to guide him back to me. I’d be the strength he needed. The lighthouse. The anchor. I’d be whatever he needed me to be. “Okay. Is he dead?”
Jonah nodded. “They all are.”
“Okay. How many of them, baby?”
“Three.”
I stroked his bruised cheek gently. Three bodies. More than I’d dealt with at one time before, but it didn’t matter. I’d make it work. I’d do whatever I had to in order to protect him from this. “Where are they?”
“In the warehouse. Henrik said he’d take care of them.”
I let out a long breath. “Henrik was with you?” Relief mixed with other emotions, and I tamped down the anger that rose with knowing that psychopath had taken my rabbit into danger. There’d be a time for it later, but right now, Jonah needed me calm.
“He killed them. I didn’t kill anyone.”
“It’s okay if you did. You were just protecting yourself—protecting me—weren’t you?”
He nodded, more life filling his eyes. “He can’t hurt you again.”
“Yeah. I’m safe. You’re safe too. I’ll make sure of it. Okay?”
Another nod, and then Jonah was wrapping his arms around me again. His lips found my neck, trailing kisses there. His hands made their way under the wet fabric clinging to my body. “I want to feel you.”
I helped Jonah get my wet clothes off, tossing them to the bathroom floor to deal with later. Each layer, until we were both naked, hands gripping skin. Jonah was frantic in the way he touched me, grabbed at me, refusing to let any space pass between us.
I turned the water off. “Bedroom,” I said when he finally released my lips long enough for me to speak. He frowned, trying to capture them again, but I pulled back just out of reach. “Bedroom,” I repeated, a little firmer this time.
Jonah pouted, but he stepped out of the shower, over the bloodied clothes on the ground, dragging me along with him, not even stopping to dry off. Then he was spreading himself out on my bed and pulling me down with him.
I pulled away, enough to take in the perfect image of him in the moonlight. “Where were you hurt?”
“Nowhere.”
“Bullshit.”
Jonah groaned. “I was hit twice before Henrik stepped in. That’s it. Nothing serious.”
After I’d murdered Henrik, I’d thank him for presumably taking on three men and attempting to protect Jonah from serious harm. “How did you get there?”
“Does it matter?”
“Damn right it fucking matters. You tell me everything, Rabbit.”
If Jonah really was okay, and it seemed like he’d returned to me from wherever he’d been in the shower, then I fully intended to punish him for putting himself in danger on my behalf. Even if I was eternally grateful for what he’d done for me.
“I called him. He picked me up. We went to the warehouse. I got back your stuff, and Henrik killed three people. Will you fuck me now?”
I knew that was a way too oversimplified version of the story, but it was enough for now.
I might not know all the shady business Henrik got himself involved with, but I knew those certainly weren’t the first bodies he’d dropped and they wouldn’t be the last. He’d sort them out, and I’d be sure to get all the details from him the moment I stepped away from Jonah next.
But for now, there was something far more urgent demanding my attention.
“I love you, Jonah, more than I can put into words. What you did for me is more valuable than any gift. That lighter is irreplaceable. But so are you. And I treasure you far more than anything I own, including the lighter. Do you understand? You put yourself in danger, and I could have lost you as well.”
“But you didn’t.”
“No. But I could have. And it would have destroyed me. I need you to promise me you won’t ever do anything like that again. Don’t put yourself in danger, especially not for me.”
Jonah crossed his arms over his chest, clearly annoyed that I was dragging this out and not just giving him what he wanted, but this was far too important to put off.
Because the world I was involved with was cruel.
It was dangerous, and it was cold, and I couldn’t have him stepping into it.
I had to protect him from it, but that wouldn’t be possible if he ran headfirst into danger any moment my back was turned.
“Promise me,” I demanded.
“No.”
“Why?”
“Because it’d be a lie, and I don’t want to lie to you. I’ll never stop protecting you, and you’ll never stop protecting me, and that’s just our life now, Devil, so get used to it.”
“I don’t need you to protect me,” I told him.
“No. But I’m going to do it anyway,” he replied, as stubborn as always.
“Jonah.”
“Dex.”
“Fuck, you’re so frustrating sometimes. I just want to keep you safe.”
“Yeah, well, same.”
My eyes, fierce like the ocean, locked with his, a blazing inferno.
Two immovable extremes, clashing while longing to coexist. I groaned, sensing that anything else I said to him now would just take us in circles.
If I couldn’t get him to agree not to put himself in danger because of me, then I’d just have to get better at protecting him, as well as myself. So there’d be no need.
“Will you fuck me now?” Jonah asked impatiently.
“No,” I answered, and he pouted. “I’m going to punish you first for being reckless.”
I watched his expression shift between intrigue and indignation before settling on the former. “Punish me how?” he asked, trying very hard not to smile, but I could still see it in his eyes.
“Turn around.”