Chapter Twenty-Six
I’ve never been a good liar.
Actually, one might call me a horrifically bad one. Make me play a bluffing game and I’ll give away myself away in seconds.
That thought doesn’t instill much confidence in me, given what I’m about to do: meet up with Tyrell and talk to him about living with Zarmenus.
I decided to get to Brewed Awakening early to get myself as settled as possible before he arrives.
I check the time: I have ten minutes. My nerves are fried, and I’m trying my best to calm down.
Right now, fear is not a helpful emotion. The more relaxed I am, the better.
On my phone, I look up Point Press. It features articles written by students about a variety of topics ranging from surviving college loans, the perks of solo travel, and questioning the relationship between social media and mental health. I don’t have to read that one to know that it’s not good.
Tyrell’s article is easy to find. It’s near the top of the website and includes a picture of a flaming pair of devil horns. It’s called “My Classmate from Hell.” I click on the picture and start reading.
When I heard the prince of Hell was going to be studying at Point this year, I wasn’t sure what to expect.
The idea of having a demon as a classmate was, to be honest, alarming.
Like many people around the world, I was wary.
All my life, I’ve been warned about demons, and I wasn’t sure what studying with one would be like.
I’m happy to report that my fears were unfounded.
Prince Zarmenus might be a demon, yes, but that is the biggest difference between him and the other freshmen.
From what I have seen, he has settled in extremely well.
He’s getting along well with his roommate, IT student Owen Greene, and is already quite popular.
The demon prince can often be spotted running along Southside running track, or working out in the campus gym. If my interviews are any indicator, the students consider him a welcome addition to the campus.
His presence has made me think a lot about the world we live in, and the way we can judge people before we meet them based on preconceptions. I’m grateful Zarmenus has come to Point because now I know firsthand that demons aren’t like what we’ve been told they are. In reality, they’re just like us.
This is the first in a series of articles in which I will be documenting my firsthand experiences of what it is like to go to college with Prince Zarmenus, aka my classmate from Hell.
Keep your eyes peeled as next week, if all goes well, I’ll be posting an interview with Owen Greene, Zarmenus’s roommate!
“Sorry I’m late,” says a voice, startling me.
I tear my eyes away from the screen to see Tyrell standing at my table.
He takes off his bag, a worn leather satchel that is so nice I want one, and drops down into the chair opposite me.
He’s dressed as preppily as always, and even has his shirt tucked in.
“You’re not late,” I say, double-checking the time on my phone to test my theory that he is, in fact, five minutes early.
“Oh, you’re right! Sorry, I just assumed. Myron is always late to things, so I never expect anyone else to be on time. I thought I’d have to wait for you. Anyway, should we get this started?”
He takes a notebook out of his bag and lays it on the table. He places his phone down between us and taps on the screen.
“We are on the record now, okay? So, when did you first find out you’d be sharing a room with the prince of Hell?”
He clicks the end of his pen.
“The day I moved in,” I say. “I thought I was sharing with a guy called Rohit, but there was a last-minute switch and we ended up being put together.”
“That must’ve been quite the surprise.”
“It really was. But after the shock passed I realized how cool it is that I get to share a room with him.”
Tyrell’s eyes narrow slightly. He knows the real story, but we both know we’re not here to tell the truth. We’re here to sell the narrative Leeke wants. In the back of my mind, I remember the ghoul Zarmenus sent to spy on her. Hopefully it’s not causing her too much grief.
As the interview continues, I sing Zarmenus’s praises.
I tell Tyrell about how funny he is, how he’s a perfect roommate.
I go into detail about how he’s considerate and fun to be around.
It’s surprisingly easy to do, as I only tell stories of how he’s been lately, conveniently leaving out anything that makes him sound bad. I sell him as the best roommate ever.
Once the interview’s over, Tyrell taps on his phone and closes his notebook.
“Okay, we’re done,” he says. “Anything you say now will be off the record.”
“How’d I do?”
“You were great,” he says. “It does bother me that we can’t tell the truth, but what Leeke wants, Leeke is going to get.”
“Exactly.”
“It’s good, though. I’m not sure if you’ve seen, but the Golden Suns have been pretty active online.”
“I try to avoid that, honestly.”
As much as I’ve tried to avoid that stuff, some of it has still crept into my algorithm.
It seems like the movement gets bigger with every passing day, with more and more people convinced Zarmenus and his family are evil and need to be dealt with.
I’ve seen people training with weapons, proudly proclaiming themselves as demon killers.
Anytime I’ve shown Zarmenus he’s laughed at them, daring them to try him.
“Changing the topic, you seem different,” Tyrell says. “Are things with Zarmenus actually better?”
“Much.”
“What changed?”
We entered a fake-dating pact.
“I don’t know,” I say. “After we had our fight he’s genuinely been really fun to share a room with. Can I tell you a secret?”
“Always.”
“I’m kinda getting a crush on him.”
Tyrell’s eyes go wide. “Seriously?”
“Yeah, I don’t know. He’s always shirtless in our room and, I don’t know, I can’t help it.”
“Damn,” he says, clearly buying it. “Well, be careful. Zarmenus is a player. I know one when I see one. And I’d hate to see your heart get broken.”
I can’t believe he’s believing me.
Maybe I’m not so bad a liar after all.
When I get back to our room, Zarmenus is clearly very pleased with something.
“Good news,” he says, his glee practically beaming out of him. “Leeke would be okay with us dating.”
I feel a scowl come on. “And how would you know that?”
“Let’s just say a friend of mine overheard her talking with her assistant about the two of us, and she said she heard about us getting dinner together.
Leeke said it would be a dream come true for her if we started dating, so we’re all good there.
Also, unrelated, but the ghoul in the bathroom asked if it can stay there, apparently it likes it.
It won’t hurt you, I promise.” He comes over and grabs me by the shoulders. “You know what this means, right?”
“Our bathroom is going to be haunted for the rest of the semester?”
“No. Well, yes, but Leeke approved! That means there’s nothing holding us back.”
He gives me a quick kiss on the top of my head, then returns to his game. I glance warily at the bathroom.
What in the world have I gotten myself into?
Nobody on campus truly thinks Zarmenus and I are dating yet.
It’s been about a week since our first hangout. Zarmenus and I have been spending a lot of time together, and have had dinner together basically every night. Even if it’s fake, it’s been enjoyable.
Tyrell has told me people have noticed we’re spending more time together, which is good.
According to the plan I wrote, now is the time we need to start being more affectionate in public. After a little more of that, we will be ready to post that we’re a couple online.
It’s something that was easier to plan than it is to execute. I’m already freaking out about it. Do I really want my face on millions of phone screens all around the world?
Zarmenus and I are both in our room. He’s been playing a shooting video game for the past few hours, and I’ve been in bed, rereading The Sanctuary.
It was first published in the sixties, which makes it harder to sink into than most books I read.
It’s a sad story about a wife deciding she’s going to divorce her husband.
The book ends the moment she sits him down to tell him, because she gives up on him changing and finally decides the only way for her to be happy is to try her luck elsewhere.
It’s a downbeat ending, but still somewhat hopeful, as there are hints throughout the story that both characters will be happier apart than they are together.
“We have to do something,” says Zarmenus. He’s only in his boxers and a pair of socks, something I’m trying not to notice too much. Another thing I’m trying not to notice is the creepy doll that came to our door. It’s now on Zarmenus’s desk, and it feels like it’s watching me.
I close my book. On this second read-through I’ve been going slower, leaving sticky notes in the margins while writing the quotes down on my side of the notebook.
“What do you mean?” I ask.
“Word isn’t spreading about us,” he says. “We need to do something drastic.”
“We’re following the plan.”
“It’s not working fast enough.”
“If we tell them now, they won’t buy it,” I say. Tyrell might’ve bought that I had a crush, but it still feels too soon to tell anyone we’re together.
Or maybe I’m dragging my feet because as soon as we do, the real test will begin.
“You humans have such strange rules,” he says.
“In Hell if two people like each other, that’s all that matters.
” He puts down his controller. “Dad will have one of his minions check on us soon. And if he asks around campus and nobody knows we’re dating, we’ll be in for a world of hurt.
We could make an Instagram post? It’ll take two seconds. ”
“We should go on another date first,” I say. I’m stalling because I’m freaked out about going social media official, but Zarmenus doesn’t seem to pick up on that.
“Tonight?”
I shake my head. “I’m going to a Gaymers meeting.”
“Oh. Can I come?”
He doesn’t appear to be joking.
“You want to?” I ask. “You know it’s a board game night, right? You said it sounds like torture.”
“Yeah, fun,” he says. “Plus, what kind of boyfriend would I be if I didn’t support your interests?”
“Tons of couples are into different things,” I say.
I think Zarmenus would hate board game night. Yes, people drink, and some people seem to care more about that than the games themselves, but still. Zarmenus belongs at a frat party, not at a game night.
He crosses his arms. “All right, what’s wrong?”
“Nothing,” I say. “If you want to join, you can. I just didn’t think you’d want to.”
“I do,” he says. “And if you’re up for it, we can test the waters and tell a few people. If they buy it, we should post.”
I blanch at the thought. I’ve complained to them about Zarmenus. There’s no way they’d buy us as a couple this early. Or will they?
For our plan to work, we’ll have to start telling people eventually.
Why not tonight?