10. Briggs
Chapter 10
Briggs
“Shall I give in: to go down fighting might bank the fires?” ― Ovid
H er fingers were too soft, too graceful, and breakable. They were everything that mine weren’t. Where she saw calluses and a cut from the glass I’d thrown away from her, I saw blood. And not my blood, either .
Of their own accord, my fingers wrapped around hers, caging them in. Rose pulled back with the last bandage in her other hand, her soft blue eyes full of distant firelight like she was the thing awaiting me beyond the gates of hell I was trapped behind. But tonight had been different. I didn’t feel like I was in hell.
“Briggs?” Her tone was breathy as if she’d just run a mile, and her neck was tinged with red that spread up to her cheeks. She left the jacket I gave her partially unzipped, and without thinking, my free hand lifted to raise the zipper as she settled back into the space between my legs, staring down at our entwined hands. Part of me wanted to move my hand in the other direction, let gravity take hold, and peel away every inch of clothing until there was nothing left. I didn’t care if there was a party going on behind us—I’d take her into my car and fuck her the way I’d been craving to until she was screaming my name, filling my windows with her hot breath as I stole that from her, too. But the more sensible part of me, the one that usually ended up upsetting Rose, was trying to take over instead. It was snowing out—she seemed cold, her small frame shivering on and off, and I was the asshole who was fantasizing about impaling her on my cock as she stitched me up.
My fingers stayed on the zipper longer than they should have, and Rose started leaning into my hand while her other one heated in my palm. My weakness for a certain brunette with baby blue eyes over the past few weeks was making me just that—weak. Vulnerable in ways I’d never been before. “What do you want, Rose?” My tongue swiped along my bottom lip as I stared back at her .
She watched my mouth and drew in her bottom lip, clamping down on it with those top teeth that made her stand out in the best way possible. I wasn’t lying when I told her they were perfect. Just like I wasn’t lying when I told her I was no good. Not for anyone, and especially not for her. The thought had me dropping my hand from her zipper as my cock throbbed against the one on my jeans. She was still wordless. Contemplating her next move—if there was going to be one. Her boldness and the way she spoke back to me told me to sit back and wait. She had a move. We both knew it. She’d force my desires from me, and I kind of liked that idea.
Her lip popped out along with her desire as she replied, “You.”
Fuck, I adored the way she spoke her mind so unabashedly.
A low groan escaped me, and I dropped her hand from mine. Instantly, my palm turned icy. “You’ll regret it later.”
“I can handle myself, remember?” So ready to fight me on everything. She folded her arms across her chest, oozing the defiance I craved from her. That pang of guilt that used to be so torturous was being replaced by something equally disastrous once more.
I raised a brow. “Oh?” I wanted to push her over that mental edge. Maybe she’d be smart and turn away. She could go back to the bonfire, back to her precious best friend . Or not. “Is that what you were doing earlier? Handling yourself back there in the woods?”
The corner of her mouth twisted up as she eyed my hand. “Better than you did.”
“I saved you,” I reminded her. “You’re lucky that cut is the only thing you got. You have no idea how close you were to hitting your head on those roots. ”
“Oh?” The inflection in her tone was bordering on mockery. Fuck that, she was mocking me. And just like that, the bratty, defiant Rose was back in full bloom. I didn’t like playing games, but with her, it was almost euphoric. “What if I wanted something else? Something more than being saved?”
My knuckles dragged down her cheek, brushing off several specks of snow. Her eyelids fluttered as she leaned into the touch. “You don’t know what you’re getting yourself into.” I dropped my hand.
Her voice wavered as she admitted, “I was trying to get into you. ” Her gaze drifted along my arms, trailing up to my mouth.
“You… we …shouldn’t.” My grip remained firm as my hand flexed around her small fingers, my body at odds with what I knew I shouldn’t be doing.
“You are always telling me what I shouldn’t do. Shouldn’t walk home alone, shouldn’t walk home alone in the dark, shouldn’t walk barefoot, shouldn’t hide my teeth when I smile. I can’t even wear someone else’s jacket now, either, apparently. All these things I shouldn’t do, but what about the things that I want to do?” She paused, righting her back to gain an inch or two on me. But even that couldn’t make her taller than me as I leaned back in my trunk. Her thumb wiggled between our palms. “I want to kiss you, Briggs. Are you telling me you don’t want to kiss me?”
Fuck. “That’s not what I’m saying.”
“Do you want to kiss me?”
“Rose,” I warned.
“Briggs.” Her thighs pushed against mine as she stepped in closer. So close, if she moved any closer, she’d certainly feel something that would tell her a lot about what I wanted but wasn’t feeling as inclined to say.
“Do. You. Want—” My fingers moved to her thighs, sliding up slowly to the loopholes of her jeans, right where my jacket was covering them. She let out a sharp gasp as I tugged her closer, my mouth less than an inch from hers as I tucked my chin to meet her face.
Her breaths were labored as I said, “You can’t know what I want, Rose. If you knew, you wouldn’t be asking me what I wanted right now. You’d be taking, and I’d be…fuck.” I muttered the last word, trying to take a deep breath, but when I did, all I smelled was a mix of coconuts and the citrus she seemed to be enjoying a lot of back in the woods. Fuck, we even smelled good together.
“So…you’d be…” Her eyes widened, pupils flaring under the heat of my gaze roaming down to her lips. She drew in her bottom lip again, pinning it down, and all of my senses were lost to my desires—lost in her.
“Fuck it.” I thrust my elbows back, closing the distance between us and forcing her mouth to mine. Her soft, full lips parted on a moan while she melted into me, her body languid in my hold. I swept my tongue in with gentle strokes, claiming her mouth with the kiss she asked for.
I pulled her in harder, needing more of her. My elbows bucked against the back of the trunk door, along with my head, but I didn’t stop. My hands moved from the loopholes of her jeans and wrapped around to her lower back, where I spread my palms along her jean-clad ass, then moved them up underneath her shirt. She was so warm, her skin flushing with goosebumps as I trailed my fingers further up, and she let out another moan against my mouth.
“You’re so fucking soft,” I groaned as my hands continued to roam her skin. Rose’s knees slid into place on either side of my hips, and the car dipped under the weight of both of us using it to brace ourselves. I couldn’t help but hope August was taking notice of my car—the way it was rocking with our movements.
“Briggs.” She gasped, and I moved my mouth from her lips and down to her jaw, then her neck, forgoing the part where I promised a kiss. A singular kiss. Because how could I give her just the one? Her hips started moving against me, grinding against my rock-hard cock. I wanted nothing more than to let it break through the restrictive material of my jeans, to let her have me any way she’d take me.
But this was only supposed to be a kiss. If I let this continue, I’d never be able to turn back from her. I wasn’t even sure I could now that I’d tasted her.
Fuck, I’m kissing the one girl I shouldn’t be kissing.
“Rose.” Kiss. “Stop.” Kiss.
Rose slid her hand down my chest, down to the waistband of my jeans, then continued until her hand fell just over my dick. She moaned and bit down on her lip, clearly satisfied with what she discovered as she ignored my words. She whispered my name against my ear, and goosebumps erupted in the wake of her warm breath as it rolled down my neck.
I knew I should, but I couldn’t stop. My fingers moved to her front, gliding across her hips, her waist. Silken, long grooves spread jaggedly over where my fingers had moved too far up along her ribs—and that’s when my entire body shut down. Images of a fire, of a young Rose trapped inside of her home, filled every cavity of my mind, the pain returning in agonizing waves with the reality of what I’d done. With a swift movement, I tore my mouth from her skin and lifted her from my lap, planting her beside me.
“You should go home,” I said roughly. I’m such a fucking idiot.
Her swollen lips parted in shock. When they snapped closed, she only nodded, then adjusted her—my—jacket, giving extra attention to the spot where my hands had left so abruptly.
She flushed over. “Did I do something wrong?” Her words were unhinged and full of the heat she was just feeling between us, tinged with embarrassment as she fought to meet my eyes again. I had to ignore the way her mussed hair and reddened mouth were calling me back to her because it was too painful to feel the wounds I’d caused her. And she didn’t even know it. But I’d given her what she asked for, and the path she was going down—it wouldn’t end well. Not for either of us.
I stood up from the trunk, tucking my painful erection away as discreetly as I could before turning and helping Rose up from the trunk, then closed the door. I reached into my pocket and pressed the button that let the gull wings fly open.
“Briggs, what—”
“I told you, Rose. I’m no good. Especially not for you. I agreed to be your friend, and I stupidly agreed to kiss you. Now it’s your turn to agree with me tonight and get in the car so I can take you home.”
She tucked her hair behind her ear, opened her mouth for a moment, and then shut it again as she nodded. “Okay.” I didn’t like watching her lose her voice in front of me, losing the strength I knew lay within her to tell me to continue and make me see that this was okay when it wasn’t. But I knew it was the only way. We could never happen.
Rose made her way into the passenger seat, and I walked around to close the door for her as she buckled in. I heard Clarissa hollering the annoying fucking nickname she always called me, but as usual, she wasn’t ready to go yet. Maybe August would be useful for once and take her home this time, but I couldn’t count on that. I’d probably be driving back to pick her up later. The only perk would be seeing his face once he saw me again after I did what I was about to do.
I started making my way around the car and stopped when I came up to August’s jacket. I tucked it behind my back tire with my shoe before climbing into the seat and starting the car.
Sludgy snow and dirt kicked up as I let the tires roll over the jacket in a burnout, shredding the fabric to pieces. If August hadn’t noticed Rose leaving in my car with his jacket abandoned on the ground, he certainly would now.