Chapter 16
Holly
Slipping in through the back door, I notice straightaway that it’s significantly more quiet than what I expected it would be.
“Jane went to put Charlotte down, and Sydney was tired, so she’s off to bed,” Brynleigh says on a yawn as she enters the kitchen and grabs a water bottle from the fridge, along with some baby dills. This group has a serious pickle addiction. There will never be enough between all of us.
Crap, how long had we been going at it? Bryn winks my way and grabs a fork from the drawer.
“Mmm, those look good. Save me some,” I note as I walk back toward the bathroom to clean up. Mark, Ava, and Trystan are shuffling cards for a game of Cards Against Humanity. Oooh fun.
“Bout time you guys rejoined the party!” Mark says on a snicker, and Ava elbows him in the arm. “Ouch… Just giving Jaxon a little shit.”
“We were chatting on the dock and lost track of time,” I answer quickly.
“Oh really? Didn’t see anyone on the dock when I put out the fire.” Trystan joins in on the fun as I roll my eyes at him before closing the bathroom door.
“Ouch…” Trystan echoes Mark’s sentiment from a minute earlier.
I laugh in privacy, knowing Brynleigh likely pinched him good.
She’s a pincher, and boy do I get a kick out of it when she sneaks up behind someone in our group and gets an unsuspecting cheek.
Immature? Definitely. But it’s funny as fuck, every damn time, and since she's basically the baby sister to the group, she can get away with it.
Colin’s reaction, out of everyone’s, might be my fave because he’s the blusher of all the guys. I can’t wait til she eventually gets a hold of Jaxon’s ass. Should I warn him?... Nah…
Walking back out, I make my way to sit beside Bryn.
Jane comes flouncing back into the room, excited to play and unabashedly watch every move between Jaxon and me.
When I pass Jax, he grabs my hand and tugs me down next to him instead.
Jane presses her lips together with glee as she draws her cards, and I do the same.
An hour passes by, and the laughs that ensue are priceless. Jaxon fits right in. In fact, it feels as if he’s been here the whole time. Charlotte whimpers on the monitor, so Jane starts to rise only to be pushed back down by Garrett as he smashes his lips to her cheek.
“I got her.”
You can feel all the ovaries at the table sparkle, and all the guys take notice.
“Take notes, gents…” Jane says proudly, sipping on her almost empty glass of wine. “That shit right there earns blowjobs.”
The guffaws and gurgled drinks can be heard around the whole circle while Garrett pumps a victorious fist in the air on the way to their bedroom.
Only Jane.
Okay, I’ve had some good ones too, but seriously, only Jane. I don’t think there are many things she hasn’t said in front of our group. Jaxon’s shaking his head as if he can’t quite believe she just said that part out loud.
“You’ll get used to it. If it’s not her, it’s usually me,” I whisper, and Jax’s eyes twinkle.
“So, I get to stay?” he asks, voice full of mirth.
“Dude…” Mark shakes his head laughing, since they’ve apparently already been through this on the guys’ end.
“Looks like the guys will keep you,” I quip, and his shoulders shake with laughter before going still as he looks at me with a playful fire. “With me…we’ll see.” I wink. He leans in and tickles my ribs, letting his fingers linger as much as they dare.
The infamous ‘I need your attention and words now’ snap sounds from my left, and we look over at a wide-eyed Jane.
“So, this…” She points back and forth between Jaxon and me. “This is going to be a thing? Yeah? Can we make it official?” She nods her head exuberantly like she’s willing her answer out of our mouths.
Jaxon’s nodding, and I decide to still make them wait for a definitive answer on Tuesday night.
“I’m considering it,” I mull aloud as I look at my cards for the fiftieth time, even though we’re at a pause in the game.
“Gah! Come on! I’ve seen cheek kisses, stares that could burn panties off, and just…just…put me out of my misery!”
Everyone titters around the circle at Jane’s die-hard, ‘I need to know’ outburst. I merely shrug my shoulders and smile at her. I’m saved seconds later.
“We’ve got a blowout! Jane, baby, I’m going to, ah, need you.” Garrett comes out of the bedroom with a baby looking extremely satisfied with herself, while both her and daddy’s shirt did not fare as well.
Raucous laughter fills the room.
“That would be why you don’t feed Mogwai after midnight.” Mark chuckles under his breath.
“She’s the cutest little gremlin I’ve ever seen!” Ava retorts. “And I think I want one.”
Mark stops laughing and stares hard at Ava while the rest of us laugh harder.
“That was shit…running down his shirt.”
“I’m aware. It’s part of it. Did he look like he regretted having her though because of it?” The laughter dies as we realize the conversation took a serious turn.
“Well, no, but…”
“I’m not getting any younger.”
“Firecracker…” Mark says softly, knowing he’s walking a fine line between battle and conversation.
“Don’t Firecracker me. We’ll talk about it later. I just wanted to say it before I lost my nerve.”
“You were scared to tell me?” Mark asks, looking sick that she was nervous to tell him anything. He anxiously shifts his cards in his hands. Ava nods her head and takes a shuddery breath.
“You haven’t really made it a secret that you didn’t want kids yet.”
“Ava, it’s a whole different story if you’re looking me in the eye and telling me that that’s what you want. I told you a long time ago I’d happily give you babies.”
A tear runs down Ava’s cheek, and Mark reaches out to thumb it away. Damn, the man goes from rough around the edges to sweet and gooey for her in a blink. Total cinnamon roll.
“I don’t want you to resent me if it’s too early.”
Mark shakes his head.
“Come on,” Mark says, laying his cards in the middle before grabbing Ava’s hand. “Let’s go talk.”
Brynleigh and I grin at each other, knowing Ava’s going to get her wish.
Mark would never deny her that. We’re so damn happy for her.
Happy tears well up in Bryn’s eyes, and she takes a swallow of her water.
She’s getting worse at playing all her cards close to the chest. I can read her like a book.
How much longer until she gets her dream? Or yours?
I gulp down the thought and push it away.
It amazes me how a room full of uteruses can go from sparkling and ready to be filled to weeping because they’re empty in two seconds.
I begin to gather cards and put them back into their cases as I notice, out of the corner of my eye, Trystan nuzzling against Brynleigh’s shoulder.
Now it’s just a matter of who ends up pregnant first. I need to get to bed.
“I’m really tired all of a sudden. You guys got this?” I ask, scooting a stack into the middle.
“Ye-Yeah,” Brynleigh says as I stand. I know she senses something off with me, but I’ve never made a deal of it, so she’s not sure what that something could be.
Trystan eyes me with a slight tilt of his head.
I make my way to the kitchen to grab a water, and it’s no surprise when I hear Jaxon mutter, “I’ll talk to her. ”
No, no…nope. That’s not what I want right now either.
I purposely walk around the other side of the wall to go toward the back staircase leading to my room and climb it quickly.
Fuck. I hear his footsteps behind me. I can’t exactly slam the door in his face.
He didn’t do anything wrong. Nobody here did.
I stalk into my room quietly but leave the door cracked as I gather my things for the bathroom. A light rap at the door fills the air.
“Hey…” The door swings open, and Jaxon leans against the frame, keeping me from darting out. Smart move, actually.
“Hey,” I answer, grabbing a big T-shirt from my bag.
“Mine looks better on you.” I don’t answer. “What’s going on up there? You practically ran from the room.”
“I’d rather not talk about it right now. It’s…silly really.”
“Holly…” Jaxon mutters low, demanding my eyes without saying it.
???
Jaxon
I watch from the doorway as Holly haphazardly grabs various items to get ready for bed. My jaw clenches at the thought of her sleeping in any shirt but mine.
“Holly,” I mutter, patiently waiting for her eyes. She rolls them slowly up toward mine. Damn, they’re pretty, even when they’re sad. I need to know why. “Talk to me.”
“I said it was silly.”
“It’s not if it has you upset. Not to me.”
“You don’t need to worry about it.”
“That’s where you’re wrong. I told you I’d prove that I’d put you first. Your feelings, worries, dreams? Those are all included. What’s going on?”
She closes her eyes, and I see her try to cover everything with a wave of anger.
She’s fighting to be so strong all the time.
It’s got to be exhausting. Now, is she going to lash out and push me away, make a joke, or open up?
When she doesn’t immediately lash out, I close the door behind me and walk up to her, taking the things from her hands before pulling her onto the bed to lie sideways across it, but next to me.
I roll over onto my side and brace my head with a hand as I watch her internal argument play out through her microexpressions.
Seeing the myriad of emotions flicker over her face has me on pins and needles.
I know she’s nearing the point of talking when her chest begins to rise and fall more quickly.
She’s gathering the nerve to open up. I wait.
“I had a plan,” she whispers toward the ceiling.
I offer her what I hope is a sincere smile, encouraging this beautiful creature to share the broken pieces of her heart with me.
“And I’m fucking angry that he blew it to smithereens.”
“He not only wasted your time, but blew up your dreams,” I validate.
“Exactly.”
“It’s okay to be angry.”
“Even if I’m also thankful that those dreams didn’t happen with him?” She turns her head toward me.
“Especially because of that. You recognize that he did a shit thing while also doing you a favor.”
“He did, didn’t he?” She mulls that over, pressing her lips together as she looks back up at the ceiling in contemplation. Oh, that cute, fucking button nose.
“So, what did you want?” I ask under my breath, nervous she won’t tell me.
“Jaxon…”
“I want to know what you dream of, Holly,” I whisper so softly she has to turn to read my lips. Holly rolls onto her side to face me, her golden brown eyes bouncing back and forth between mine. I’m asking her to trust me, again. I’m asking her to be vulnerable, again.
“I wanted it all. A happy marriage, a family, maybe a pet or two,” she whispers. She doesn’t prioritize a lucrative job, stability, a big fancy house, or a nice car. She just wants love, happiness, and people to share it with.
“You’ve got a fantastic job, a house, and a nice car.”
“They’re mostly empty, except for all the rugrats that aren’t mine by blood.”
“It’s something.”
“I know, and I should be grateful, which I am, but it all still feels… empty. I feel…empty.”
Her forehead squinches up, and her eyes fill like she’s about to cry. Shit, twice in one night! I scoot forward and reach for her face, pulling her lips against mine.
“Oh, Sweetheart…” I lay my forehead to hers. “You’re not alone anymore… You've got Dr. Sexy for a boyfriend now.”
She snorts against my lips, causing me to sputter out a giggle with her.
“Is that so?”
“Did you really think after moving, all this chasing, and especially after this weekend, that I could just let you go? I'm like…crazy into you, if you haven't read the memo.”
“There was a memo?” she teases.
I roll my eyes dramatically and sit up, pull open the bedside table drawer, and rummage around. Thankfully, it has what I need. Flopping back onto the bed on my stomach, I scratch out a note, rip it off the pad, fold it, then hand it over to her.
She rolls her eyes in return and, with a semi-goofy smile, opens the note to read it aloud. “Memo… J + H.” Her eyes take in the big ol’ heart I drew around the initials before she looks up at me with a small smile.
I purse my lips with a thought and snatch the note back from her hands before scribbling again, as I voice my words out in the open.
“P.S. This means I really, really like you.” I sign it from Dr. Sexy and re-fold it–like something I would’ve folded back in my high school days–before writing her name on the front and handing it back to her.
“That’s better. A little memento for you.
A bit old school and professionally signed by the doctor himself. ”
She chuckles and takes it from my hands, holding it like a treasure, and I jump on the opportunity to flip Holly over onto her back and smother her with kisses.
It’s been a long day. I feel like we’ve been at this for a while now, instead of just a couple of days.
I can’t believe that this all really just heated up yesterday.
“Now, I can respect that we’re keeping Jane on edge here a little bit longer, but there’s no way that I can sleep knowing you’re not wearing my shirt tonight.
” I hop up from the bed and run across the hall, snagging my tee she wore last night.
It still carries a scent that’s a mix of us, and I secretly never want to wash it.
When I toss it across the room at her, she smirks and lifts her arms in the air.
“Oh.” I tilt my head in question. “Do I get the honors?”
“Why not? I haven’t had my skin checkup yet this year.”
I cock an eyebrow at her and close the door.
“Do you have any weird freckles?”