Chapter 21 The Darkness of Hearts #2
Wiping his tears, he meets my eyes. “Connor wasn’t lucky like that.”
My hands freeze on his forearms. “What does that mean?” My sharp voice rings off the kitchen tiles.
“Nothing.”
My frustration reaches maximum intensity. “Tell me.”
He shakes his head emphatically. “You have your secret. Connor has his. If you wanna know what it was like for him—ask him. He’ll tell you. He’s been dying to tell you. That’s not what I’m here for.”
“Then why are you here?” I do shout this time.
“Because I love you, Archer,” he shouts back.
“I can’t even remember a time when I didn’t.
And nothing’s ever changed that. Not your mom, not Connor, not even you with your blatant disregard of me for four years.
I am fucking hopelessly in love with you.
You can yell at me, you can push me away, you can shut me out, you can sleep with whoever the fuck you want, and it won’t matter.
I’m still gonna be off somewhere, waiting for the day you realize I’m the best thing that’s ever happened to you. ”
All right. Well. That shuts me up.
He keeps going, though. “No one will ever understand you like I do. No one could possibly want you more. But if you need a couple more years to figure that out all by yourself, then fine. I’ll still be young.”
I take him by the shoulders, more moved than I’ve ever been by anything he’s said—and he’s said some pretty awesome things to me. “Whoa—cool off, all right? I’m not that old. And I definitely don’t need a couple more years to know what I’ve got here, okay? I know. I get it.”
“Then stop trying to protect me from who you are. I can handle it. I know you better than you think I do.”
“Do you? How?”
He narrows his eyes and closes his lips, like there’s some universal mystery he’s hell-bent on keeping from me. The shine in his eyes tortures me. Ever the more fascinating…
Right now, his love for me is almost suffocating in its pure ferocity. It heats my blood and arouses me in a way I can’t really explain because there’s no precedent for it. Nothing else compares.
“Explain it to me later then,” I say in the breath I take before I pull him up against me and grab his face in my hands. My mouth lands hard on his, and his response is immediate and overwhelming. His lips give way, and his tongue meets mine with all the passion he just poured into his words.
I lift him and put him on the counter, having better luck with the buttons on his shirt this time. He shucks his pants while I shove the shirt off his shoulders. “You’re so fucking beautiful.” I pull his cock from the slit in his boxer briefs and lower myself to take it into my mouth.
His head bangs against the cabinet as he shoves his hand into my hair, getting a good grip as I suck him and he thrusts.
“Archer—no,” he whimpers.
Devastation plows through my chest. I let him go and press my head against his abs. He yanks at my hair.
“I don’t want to feel good when you’re hurting. Let me be with you. Take me with you.”
I understand he’s not asking to go to the Four Seasons. “I need you,” I whisper against his skin. “I need you so fucking much.”
“I need you, too. All of you.”
I drag my mouth up his chest, pushing his underwear down. He scoots his ass to the edge of the counter, and I slide two fingers past his lips. He sucks on them as we stare into each other’s eyes. With my other hand, I pull his briefs off his legs and fling them behind me.
“Lube,” I say softly, as in there’s none on the kitchen counter.
He sucks himself off my fingers and says, “Go get it. I’ll get myself ready.”
I groan, my mouth taking his again in a heated, messy kiss. His hand snakes between us. He lets out a soft grunt when he penetrates himself.
“Let’s go to bed.”
“No. I want you right here. I don’t even want lube, but if you insist…I’ll wait.”
I glance down to watch as his fingers glide smoothly in and out of his hole. I open my pants, freeing my fiercely hard erection. He takes my hand and spits into it, a decent amount. I add my own and coat my cock with it. It’s barely enough, but it is enough.
“This is what you want?”
“Yes. Now.”
He moves his hand out of the way, and I poise myself at his entrance, kissing him as I shove my cock inside.
He grunts, the sound coming from deep in his chest. He got himself wet enough that I’m able to move.
To fuck him. With his ass in my tight grip, I punch through all the pain, all the memories, all the fear, and hope he doesn’t feel too much of it. He doesn’t deserve it.
“Touch yourself.”
He murmurs a refusal with a small shake of his head.
“Please, angel. Come for me. Show me it’s okay what I’m doing to you.”
“Archer, Jesus.” He grabs the back of my neck and hauls my mouth to his for a long, deep kiss. When he ends it, he says, “Tell me I feel good.”
“You feel so fucking good. There’s no one for me if there isn’t you. Please touch yourself.”
“I love you so much.”
Reassured once I see his fist tighten around his cock, I bury my face against his neck and move through all his clenching friction. I’m too rough—I know it has to be too rough, but he doesn’t show any strain. He takes me, stroking himself in time with my thrusts.
“Please come,” I whisper, begging him and the universe for this to be okay. For this not to ruin everything. For what he said to be real. “Please, angel. Please come for me.”
The muscles surrounding my cock ripple as his body gives a sudden jolt. “Mmphh…I’m coming for you,” he assures me with a choked off gasp. “I’m coming only for you.”
With one hand, I let go of his ass and feel the proof for myself.
The slick of cum on his abdomen and hand send a powerful wave of relief through me.
I relax enough to finally feel how close to the edge I am.
My instinct is to draw back from it. Kiss him, slow down, cool it off just enough, but I’m raw inside him for the first time, feeling every ridge and calorie of heat encasing my cock, and I don’t want to stop. I want all these feelings out of me.
I come hard, shuddering as he holds onto my waist and takes every drop my dick spills inside him. When I finally go still, he pulls himself closer, wrapping both arms around me and whispering urgently in my ear, “Never push me away again. Promise me. Not one more day apart.”
“I promise you.”
Tonight, I can’t imagine any force in heaven or on earth that could separate us.
But what is life if not a constant shifting between suffering and joy?
The truth is all good things…
All good things…
End.