Chapter 12
CHAPTER 12
Misha
Felix spent all the time in the world cleaning her up, disappearing to the bathroom for just a minute to return with a warm rag, a pair of sweats replacing his jeans as he undid the bindings, massaging her ankles and wrists before wiping down her skin and adding a drop of oil to all the joints he had bound. Like a doll, she laid there and let him take care of her, basking in the aftercare.
When he was finished and half of her body was cooling after the cloth passed over it, he handed her a new bottle of water and a bag of chips. “We can go downstairs and eat something real soon. Let me just jump in the shower again.”
She cocked her head and sat up before he could leave the room, pressing up onto her forearms. She had assumed the shower last night was to try and relax, so another seemed unnecessary. “You don’t want to shower together?”
He frowned. “It’s been a long day since the storm. Don’t you want to rest?”
“No,” she protested, frowning as she kicked off the sheets. It was sweet of him to think she wanted to rest, but getting sudsy and clean with Felix sounded a lot more fun than taking a nap. “I want to be with you.”
His gaze softened at that, and after a bit of silent debate he nodded, stepping into the bathroom. “Okay.”
Misha followed him, noting that the bathroom was identical to hers back in her room, just like the rest of the space. Without a word he started the water, and Misha was grateful for the provided soaps when she spotted his masculine body wash. As much as she liked to spend time with him, she still wanted to smell girly and sweet once she bathed.
When they slipped under the water, she noted that Felix was a different person. A little more withdrawn, a lot more uncertain. She soaked herself before going to grab the shampoo, eyeing him as she moved. “What’s wrong?”
His jaw clenched, and although the water rolled down his body, he was too tall for it to splash his hair without bending, and he didn’t look inclined. “I um, I don’t usually shower with anyone afterward.”
That had her pausing, and surfing through her mind, she realized he was right. Despite the time they’d spent together she couldn’t think of a single occurrence where they’d showered. Sometimes he would draw a bath for her afterward and lazily wash her, but he hadn’t joined her in the tub. He never had now that she thought more on it. Sure, he took care of her very well, but washing together wasn’t something he did with her. “Oh, do you want me to go?”
His gaze lifted to hers. “No.”
She worried her lip, waiting for a moment before she reached for the shampoo again. “Then I don’t understand.”
Felix blew out a breath, and she wondered if maybe he saw what she did. He just made an effort back in the room, but in here he wasn’t following through. She didn’t have the pieces to understand why this was such a big deal, but distantly she wondered if maybe it had something to do with his wife. It was the only real reason she could come up with as she squeezed shampoo onto her palm.
It wasn’t until she had washed out the shampoo and reached for the conditioner that he spoke again. “The last person I showered with was my wife.”
She almost dropped the bottle, turning to him with wide eyes even though the thought had just occurred to her as well. To her this was just a shower, cleaning them up after a good time, but it now held a different significance than she’d expected. She had assumed he showered at least occasionally with his wife, but she hadn’t realized he hadn’t done so with anyone else since her passing.
Misha swallowed, the heat of the water not enough to wash away her sudden embarrassment. “I didn’t know. I wouldn’t have pushed if you’d told me that.”
His lip curled into a half smile when he looked at her. “You don’t need to apologize. I just never thought I would love someone else enough to do this with them again. It was something I only ever wanted to do with Yvonne. And… now you.”
Her heart warmed, stuck between the sweet words of his admission and that damnable L word that slipped in there. “Well, you know there’s more benefits to showering than standing next to each other.”
“Misha—”
“Not sex,” she continued, pushing aside the conditioner in lieu of his body wash. He eyed her when she grabbed the sponge and poured some on it, lathering it up before she twirled her finger. “In front of me here. Face the water. It’s nice and warm.”
She swore he somehow looked more concerned than before. But she gently guided him to stand in front of her, knowing that he would trust her with something like this. He would always speak up if he didn’t like something, and Felix was silent as she stood behind him, staring at his shoulders above her head, and began washing his skin. She didn’t try to make it sultry or erotic, she just wanted to prove that showering with her was an okay idea and she wouldn’t turn around and betray his trust for revealing something like that.
Felix’s head slowly fell backward as she worked the loofa across his skin, taking her time at his firm buttocks and down his strong thighs. She appreciated the size of the space, letting her bend down to run to sponge across his calves, toes, and back up his shins and over his knees and thighs.. She skipped over his cock, going for his chest and abs, up to his neck again where she pressed a soft kiss to his skin.
She hadn’t meant to, but the shower was turning steamy fast. Moving to the last part of him, she sudsed up her hands before she grabbed his dick, gently cleaning him from behind.
Misha pressed her cheek to his back, listening to him inhale as he took a sharp breath. “I’m sure you’re going to fuck me in the shower sometime. Probably lots of times after this. But that wasn’t my point. You can clean me up afterwards, but I like the chance to care for you.”
“That’s not expected—” he started.
“Because I want to,” she continued, gripping his cock a little tighter when he tried to protest. “You might be my Dom, but I want to be your submissive and more. Sometimes that means I want to thank you for taking such good care of me.”
The fight left his shoulders and he sagged, letting her continue the handjob now that his cock had hardened. She didn’t mind, she even enjoyed herself when he came across her hands, and they got to start the washing process all over again.