9. Hazel
NINE
Hazel
It felt good to be outside after being cooped up in my apartment working on my manuscript for the past few days. Easton had some time off, so he spent it with Jade, and now we’re all hanging out at the park.
Even more, I know I needed some time around other humans. I got two more dead-air calls over the week, and I’m shaken, to say the least.
Fresh air, sunshine. I’ll clear my head, and everything will be right as rain.
Though, I will admit I never really understood that metaphor. What exactly was right about rain?
“Watch out! I’m going to gobble you all up!”
Easton starts running after Jade and a few of her friends who met at the park for a playdate, and I can’t help but laugh. He’s acting like an old troll, and the girls are squealing with delight.
I can’t deny the warm feeling in my chest as I watch him with them. He’s gotten a bit more comfortable with his niece, and it’s times like these that he’s at his best.
Playing and running around? Yeah, Easton has that down pat.
But it’s still weird, and I still don’t know what to do with the fact that he almost kissed me that night. Something is going on with us, as much as I try to ignore it.
Every day I’m with them, helping to watch Jade, the familiar things about him pull me in all the more.
You can’t fall into that trap, Hazel. You can’t.
Beyond being way too busy for that stuff, there’s also the calls. I’m not about to bring Easton and Jade into that drama.
Still…doing basic housework with him, cooking, cleaning, and playing with Jade forces all those “family” thoughts to the front of my brain. And it’s impossible to ignore them.
I wanted that stuff. A family. I wanted to be a mom, but after Easton left and didn’t come back, I shoved all those desires down and focused on my career.
Thinking about them again is…I don’t know what it is, but it feels hard regardless.
Worse, part of me feels so pathetic for swooning over a guy who’s just cooking food for his niece. The same guy who left me hanging.
I mean, come on. What the hell, right?
“Ahh! Uncle Easton! No!” Jade screams through giggles as he lifts her up onto his shoulder while carrying two more of her friends—one on his leg and one on his free arm.
He looks ridiculous…and amazing.
Would we have had kids? Easton said he didn’t want any.
The thought stings. But it doesn’t leave me alone when I try to force it away. Instead, I’m hit by so many more.
Would we have lived in Red Lodge or moved away? Would we have a house? Pets? Is he a dog guy or a cat guy? Both? Guinea pigs?
Would we still be together even after all this time? Would we be happily married—him running his business and me writing?
Would it work?
And I want to know if I’m the only one who’s been feeling this way. I try not to stare at Easton when we’re together. I try to not pay too much attention.
So, I haven’t been able to tell if he’s as messed up about all this as I am. Some part of me wants him to be.
Because at least then he’d be doing a little bit of suffering, which I think he’s earned.
Lost in my thoughts, I hardly notice when the shenanigans in front of me die down, and Easton comes over to the bench where I’m sitting to catch his breath.
He’s all smiles as he does, and damn my stupid heart for pitter-pattering in my chest.
“Oof, a drill sergeant could take notes from those girls.”
I laugh, scooting over so Easton can sit down. He lifts up the hem of his shirt, wiping it across his brow to soak up some of the sweat.
It shouldn’t be as sexy as it is.
No, Hazel. It’s gross. Sweat is just gross. There’s nothing else.
When he looks over at me, I offer a smile. “Well, take a break. I think the girls are permitting it for now.”
We both look over at the little trio of ten-year-old terrors, and they playfully eye Easton like they’ve got his number.
“Jeez. Would it be bad to just dip out now?”
He makes a face at me, and I can’t avoid the laugh that bubbles up from my chest. “Yes. You can’t abandon your niece.”
“Dammit.”
We’re chuckling lightly when a woman walks over from the bench across from us. She’s the mother of Candance, one of Jade’s friends, and she approaches us with a bright grin and a wave.
“You sure have a way with those girls, I’ll tell you that.” Easton smiles at the compliment. “You’ve definitely got a keeper there.”
It takes me longer than it should to realize that the woman is implying that Easton and I are a couple. I jerk upright on the bench, holding out a hand to wave off the very incorrect assumption.
“Nah,” Easton says, wrapping his arm around me, “it’s me who’s the lucky one. She’s just letting me have a moment so I look good.”
My cheeks are on fire as Easton slides his hand up to my head and forces it to the side so that he can plant a kiss on my hair.
What the absolute fuck does he think he’s doing? This is bad. So, so, so bad.
“Aww, that’s so sweet. You two.” The woman waves at us, all enamored by Easton’s lie, and it takes everything I have not to yank myself away and punch him.
“Well, I just wanted to say thank you for entertaining the girls. It’s usually such a handful to be out here at the park with her. You gave me the afternoon off.”
“Happy to oblige, Sarah.”
Easton turns up the power on his megawatt smile and then flashes it in my direction, pretending to be so fucking in love.
I’m going to kill him.
Sarah, which is apparently the woman’s name that I missed while fuming, grins all the harder.
“Well, I’ll keep that in mind.” She leans forward, patting Easton’s knee. “You’re doing such a good job with everything that happened.”
Easton stiffens, clearly not enjoying how the rumors of his predicament have circulated through town.
“I’m so sorry for your loss, hun. But truly, you’re stepping up for that little girl. She’s lucky to have you.”
Faltering for only a moment, Easton nods. “I’m lucky to have Jade. Really.”
“Aww,” Sarah swoons. “Well, I’ll leave you two alone. Y’all are such a cute couple.”
Maneuvering my head again, Easton kisses my forehead, and I go stock still. Oh, my God. This is too much .
Then, Sarah wanders off, and I wait two whole seconds before smacking Easton across the arm and glaring at him.
Easton has the nerve to laugh, and I glare harder. “What the hell was that about?”
“Sorry! Sorry.” He waves off another smack to his arm, trying to hold back a laugh. “I wasn’t trying to make you uncomfortable. It just felt easier to pretend we were together than have to give her our entire backstory.”
I shake my head. “So not an excuse! You could have said literally anything else. ‘Oops, not my girlfriend. Just the nanny.’ ‘We’re old friends.’ End of story.”
There’s a beat of silence as Easton shrugs, releasing a long exhale. I’ll wait for him to come up with a response, though, because he’s not getting out of this.
“It was funny, Hazel. I know how people in this town like to spread rumors. Figured I’d give ‘em some material. Besides, Sarah,” he gestures with his thumb toward her bench, “has been flirting with me since the girls started hanging out. I needed a way to shut that down.”
“Ugh, you suck.” I sigh, hanging my head in my hands, but a tiny laugh sneaks out.
“See. Even you think it’s funny.”
Shoving him playfully, I blow a raspberry at him. “I think your face is funny.”
He laughs, and we’re both batting at each other like dumb kids. “What are you twelve?”
“So’s your face!”
The comeback makes no sense at all, and we both devolve into a fit of giggles. It’s so damn hard to keep being mad at him, and I hate it a little.
But not as much as I should.
“Look,” I shoo Easton away, trying to catch my breath, “if it helps you to keep the soccer moms at bay, I’ll let it slide. But don’t do it again. We can workshop something, alright? No messy backstory and no strangers thinking I’m doing the boss, mkay?”
Easton laughs at me but nods. “Fine. Fine. It’s a deal. But it wasn’t a total lie.”
My skin is flaming again, and I roll my eyes. “Yeah, yeah. Twisting the truth, sergeant.”
He knocks me with his shoulder. “Not for a while, author. Still, it’s clear not everything has changed.”
“And what precisely do you mean by that?” I narrow my eyes at him, folding my arms.
“I can still make you blush like crazy.”
He grins, and damn me to hell, but my cheeks just get hotter, undoubtedly a very obvious shade of pink.
Bursting out laughing, Easton falls into the hilarity as I swat at him. But he pulls me under his arm and presses another kiss to my head.
It feels so familiar, right in a way that I can’t admit or talk about because of what it might mean.
Still chuckling, Easton breathes out, stirring my hair and wafting up the scent of his cologne.
“That’ll never get old, Haze. I swear.”
My heart skips. That’s the first time he’s called me the old nickname since I started helping with Jade. Mind spinning, I let Easton release me as he gets up to go play with the girls again.
What’s happening, Hazel? What the fuck is happening?