Chapter 18
CARA
I smooth Nina’s hair as she sits in my lap, her arms wrapped around me tight, as though fearful that I might let her go at any moment.
As if I would be anywhere other than at her side right now.
Even in here, in the dark of this tiny, cramped room that they’ve stuffed us into, it’s my duty to do what I can to look after her.
I’m her mother, after all, and even if we are in a nightmare scenario, I refuse to let any harm come to her.
Well… Any more harm than already has, of course.
Because I know that, even if they didn’t directly lay a hand on her, that there’ll be emotional wounds from what she has seen today.
A man killed right in front of her, gunfire, blood, violence—and then, being snatched up and taken right there alongside me, when I should have been able to protect her.
If I had only been able to get her to Ilya before...
But then, it would be Max in this situation, and not her. It’s not like they would have left without someone they could hold over his head. Not that I know the reason behind that.
I don’t even know where I’m being held right now—I think it’s a bar of some kind, because I smelled alcohol when they were leading us in.
A bag was pulled over my head before I got out of the car.
I could hardly take in who was doing what to me by then, and I was just willing to go along with whatever it took if it meant that I could survive.
I clung to Nina for dear life, promising myself that, as long as she was okay, I would find a way out of this.
Though I was finding it harder and harder to believe that with every passing moment.
It’s nearly pitch-black except for the light coming beneath the crack in the door.
I tried banging on it, but to no avail. It’s locked tight, a heavy bolt rattling on the other side of the wood when I attempted to shove it open.
Wherever they have us, they have no intention of letting us out anytime soon.
I don’t even know if there’s a guard on the door, silence stretching out before us that feels like it might close me in its fist at any second.
And so, I’ve decided that the only thing I can really do that is worth a damn is take care of my daughter.
We don’t have food, or water, or anything that I can use to make her more comfortable.
But at least I can hold her and try to convince her to get some sleep.
She dozed off for a little while, and since she’s woken, she’s not said a word, clearly too frightened and confused to begin to make sense of anything that is happening here.
And I can’t blame her. God, I’ve no clue what is happening either. They must be trying to blackmail Alexei for something, but what? I’m just a pawn being pushed around the board, and all I can hope for is that I don’t find myself taken out in the process.
Suddenly, I hear footsteps coming along the corridor, and I leap to my feet and rush over to the door to intercept whoever it is before they can get too far.
There must be someone here I can reason with, someone who will see how cruel it is to keep my daughter and I locked up here like we are a couple of fucking animals.
I shake the door in its frame, trying to draw the attention of whoever is passing by, hissing through the crack as I attempt to attract their notice.
“Hey!” I call out. “Hey! Please, I’m in here, I need help!”
And, all at once, the door swings open before me and I stagger back in surprise. I squint against the sudden onslaught of light, pulling a face as it burns into my retinas, but, as my vision adjusts, I find myself eye-to-eye with a man I’ve never seen before.
He was not there at the attack, I know that for sure. He looks me up and down slowly, and a smile spreads over his face.
“In one piece,” he murmurs. “Good.”
“For now,” I shoot back angrily. “My daughter and I, we need food and water, and somewhere to rest—”
“What do you think this is, exactly?” he asks me, cutting me off before I can go any further.
My brows knit together in confusion. “I—”
“Because I don’t think you’re understanding exactly what’s going on here,” he continues smoothly, not breaking his flow for a second as he moves closer to me.
I draw back, the scent of alcohol practically leaking out of his pores.
“You’re alive because I need you alive,” he goes on, not waiting for my response, glancing behind me at Nina. “Both of you.”
I shift slightly, blocking his view of her, suddenly feeling disgusted at the idea of him so much as laying eyes on her.
Who does this bastard think he is? I want to slap him, to scream in his face that he doesn’t get to do this to me, that he doesn’t just get to snatch my daughter away like it is nothing, but the words fail me.
“You’re valuable to Alexei, and so, you’re valuable to me,” he goes on. “As long as that stays the case, then you and your daughter have nothing to be afraid of.”
How does he know she’s my daughter? My mind races, and I wonder if I gave that much away when I stepped out into the garden before. Were him and his men watching us then?
I thought that Alexei was being paranoid when he told me that someone could see us, but maybe I should have been more careful.
I would do anything to go back in time and change it all, undo the mess I’ve made of this.
I squeeze my eyes shut, remembering the moment I put in the application to this job in the first place. If I had only—
“Look at me.”
His words cut through my mind, and I open my eyes once more, too afraid of what he’ll do if I defy him.
He eyes me for a long moment, as though enjoying the terror on my face.
His gaze is cold and piercing, the kind that cuts right through to the bone, and I can see not an ounce of kindness or decency in this man.
“But if he decides that you’re not worth the trouble,” he continues. “Then... Well, things might change.”
A smirk rises up his lips, though it does not find his eyes.
I take a step back from him again, shielding Nina.
I know she’s already seen so much, already endured such a nightmare in going through all of this, but something about the way this man is looking at me tells me that he would be the worst possible thing that could happen to her.
“But, for now, you’re safe,” he finishes up. “I’ll have one of my men bring you something to eat later. His gaze flicks up and down me again, as though considering just what he’s going to do to me. “You should rest. You could need your energy later.”
The smile spreads a little further, and then, he steps out of the room, pulling the door shut behind him and leaving the silence to crawl into me even more deeply than it did before.
“Mommy?”
Nina speaks my name softly, clearly not sure if I’m even capable of responding to her right now. My heart swells in my chest, hearing how frightened she is, and I stoop down at once to pull her into my arms.
“It’s going to be just fine, sweetheart,” I promise her, though I’m trying to convince her as much as myself. I’ve no idea what is going to happen. Alexei will come for us, right?
I want to trust that he will get us out of here, but how can I know for sure? At the end of the day, he could be willing to sacrifice the two of us if it means holding on to whatever that man is asking him in return. If it had been Max, it might have been a different story, but us...
I don’t know if we mean enough to him for rescue. I have to pray that we do, of course, for the sake of my daughter, for the sake of myself, for the sake of everything that I hold dear.
“You just close your eyes and rest your head in my lap,” I continue, as I pull off my cardigan and drape it on the ground, ignoring the shiver that rushes through my system as I expose myself.
I don’t care. I would freeze right here on the ground if it meant keeping her warm for just a little while longer.
She does as she’s told, and I plant my hand on her arm, able to feel the shaking that courses through her entire body. She is doing her best to be brave for me, but she’s just a little girl, and this isn’t the kind of thing any little girl should have to be strong in the face of.
I listen to the sound of my breath there in the dark, and wonder how much longer he’s going to make us wait. Because, right now, every second that passes feels like a lifetime.