Chapter 16 #3
Will opens his mouth to offer comfort, but everything he thinks of saying feels hollow. There’s nothing he can say that will make Owen feel less guilty or remove the doubt from his mind. “I’m glad that you’re alive and not him.”
Owen raises his head to watch Will. “Thank you. He really wasn’t a good person, but I still didn’t want to kill him. And… fuck Joel. Just fuck him. Can I say that?”
Will strokes Owen’s cheek. “I won’t ever tell you what you can or cannot say. And thank you.”
“I know I might seem mellow, like I’m okay with what you’ve told me, but I’m not. It takes me some time to process things.”
“I understand. Take all the time you need. And if you need to keep some distance from me—”
“That sounds like the last thing I need.” He lets out a long breath. “I feel lighter after telling you what happened. I didn’t think I’d ever share it with anyone.”
“I won’t abuse your trust.”
“I know. Can I slip my hand underneath your shirt?”
The way Owen looks at him makes it clear he now understands why Will appreciated him asking before touching. “You can.”
Owen’s hand is warm as it travels from Will’s stomach up to his chest. His palm rests above Will’s heart.
“I don’t understand something,” Owen says. “About Nate. He told me those things and warned me about you, but he also acted friendly with you at Rodie’s. You went to help him with that leak.”
Unfortunately, Will can’t control the increasing beating of his heart underneath Owen’s palm. “Nate and I aren’t friends, and don’t ever count on him to care about anyone but himself. Would it be okay if I ask you to leave it at that?”
Owen hesitates before saying, “Okay.”
“And I have another request. I might change my mind later, but I would like for you to stop asking before touching me.”
Owen frowns, and Will can’t blame his confusion. “I want to try giving you the freedom to touch.”
“But I understand now why you like it when I ask.”
“Then you should also understand that I don’t want to compare you to Joel. When he touched, it felt like he was claiming ownership. It’s not the same with you.”
Instead of speaking, Owen moves his hand underneath Will’s shirt, finding his left nipple and pinching it.
In an instant, Will’s cock stirs in his jeans.
He tilts his head to meet Owen’s soft lips.
His breath is sweet, his tongue so skillful.
As they kiss, Owen’s hand goes everywhere.
It feels wonderful to trust someone again this way, though Will still feels edgy, like he’s trying out a new language he’s eager to get right.
Old instincts make him feel as though he’s being used, but he fights those instincts since they don’t represent the truth.
“Can I show you something?” Owen asks.
“Sure.”
He reaches for his backpack and pulls out a sketchbook, the cover made of brown leather. He holds it close to his chest as he sits with his legs crossed, biting his lower lip as if debating what to do.
“What’s wrong?” Will asks.
“I’m worried you’ll think it’s weird.”
“So? Art can be beautiful and weird.” It feels odd for him to make such a comment, since he knows nothing about art, but he should start to know more since it’s an important part of Owen’s life.
“Okay, I’ll show you. You have the right.”
The right? Will moves to sit next to Owen, watching as he opens the cover.
“I drew some of these before I… saw you in all your glory, so I don’t want to show you the old ones. I worked on new ones after the evening of the book club.” Owen flips through the pages and lands on a drawing that makes Will smile.
“That’s…”
“Your chest.”
“The details… wow.”
“It’s hard getting hair right. Also…” He flips to another page that shows Will’s stomach, with his narrow treasure trail.
“Those are…”
“Sexy?”
“Yeah.” It’s a strange feeling to be aroused by drawings of himself. Maybe it’s not about the drawings themselves, but the notion of Owen alone in his room, imagining Will’s body while putting it on paper.
“Can I check if I was accurate?” Owen asks.
Will holds back a smile. “How do you want to check?”
“Well, when I draw you, I usually picture you lying down.”
“Without my shirt?”
“Of course.”
Well, then. Will glances around to make sure they truly are alone, then he pulls off his shirt and lies down on the blanket, the late afternoon breeze stroking his skin.
Owen turns toward him, his eyes moving between Will’s torso and the drawing. “Yeah, I got it right. I spent most of last night drawing you. I didn’t know if we were… I wasn’t sure about us, so I wanted to have as much of you on paper.”
Will acknowledges that with a nod. He hates imagining all the dark thoughts that must have crossed Owen’s mind since Nate had spread his poison. But he doesn’t want to think of Nate right now.
“I drew your bicep,” Owen says and turns his sketchbook for Will to see. It’s his arm, raised next to the outline of his head.
“Was I accurate?” Owen asks.
Will raises his arm above his head.
Owen smiles. “I was. Now, the next one is a bit… creepy.”
“Show me.”
Will sucks in a breath as he sees the next drawing. It’s the outline of his chest from the side, with his nipple firmly held between someone’s teeth. “I hope that it’s you biting it.”
“It’s my sketchbook—of course it’s me.”
“And is it accurate?”
“Accurate? Hmm.” Owen moves his long hair back and leans down to meet Will’s left nipple with his soft lips. He sucks gently, spreading warm currents across Will’s chest. His cock pushes against his jeans.
“I have more,” Owen says once he raises his head. “I think you’re my muse.”
“My body, at least.”
“No. You. It’s never just about the flesh. Ready to see your pubes?”
Will laughs. “Let me see. Damn.” The drawing is of Will’s hip bones, navel, and the upper part of his pubic hair.
“Can I check if it’s accurate?” Owen asks, his eyes already focusing on Will’s crotch.
“I’ll do anything for art.”
“Is that so?” Owen opens the button of Will’s jeans, then lowers the zipper.
It reminds Will of the first night they were intimate, how he enjoyed being slowly undressed by Owen.
He raises himself a bit to help Owen when he pulls down his pants and underwear, leaving his cock tucked inside the fabric while most of his pubes are exposed.
Owen leans down and sniffs. “I love your smell. Did I tell you that?”
“Once or twice.”
“You’re hard.”
“Please tell me you drew my cock.”
“Maybe.”
“Owen.”
He laughs and raises his head. With the sketchbook held above Will’s face, he flips to a different page. “Oh, didn’t mean to show you that one.”
“Wait, let me see.” Will takes the sketchbook, speechless as he sees the profile of his face. “It’s beautiful. I mean, the drawing is.”
“And your face.”
He wonders if he really looks as good as he does in this drawing. He knows he’s handsome, but that was what had caught Joel’s attention in the first place and why Ray wanted him to be used by his business partners.
“Can you be my model for the day?” Owen asks. “Well, for the afternoon.”
“How do you want me?”
“That’s a very dangerous question. I want you to stay lying like you are.
Bring back your left arm above your head.
Place your right hand on your chest. Spread your fingers…
nice. And this should be a bit lower.” He holds Will’s pants and pulls them down to reveal the top part of his cock as it’s caged inside the fabric.
“You’re going to keep it there?” Will asks.
“Yes. Do you mind? It’s for art.”
Will sighs. “Sure. For art.”
*
The sky turns from pale blue to faint orange, and the air turns slightly colder, but Will doesn’t mind since Owen seems so focused on his work.
“Can you tilt your head a bit to look at me?”
Will does, the side of his face resting on his arm, which is above his head.
Owen sighs. “You’re making it difficult for me to stay professional, but it’s not like you can help it.”
“You don’t have to stay professional at all times.”
“Hmm, that’s true. I mean, a less serious artist would ask his model to lick his arm. Slowly.”
“Is that so?” Holding Owen’s gaze, Will sticks out his tongue and slowly licks his arm. His cock has been on good behavior for the last twenty minutes, but now it’s back to causing havoc in Will’s jeans, pressing painfully in an attempt to break free.
Owen opens his mouth, then sharply turns toward the road. “Do you hear that?”
Will concentrates until he hears it too.
People. He sits up and turns around. Through the trees, he can faintly see figures approaching, and it seems that they are carrying things.
He hurries to pull up his pants and grab his shirt.
He finishes dressing just in time to see people emerging from the line of trees, holding what seems like recording equipment.
“What the hell?” Owen asks. “Are they filming a movie here?”
Some of the people notice them, and one of them, a man with a gray and pointy mustache, comes over. “Sorry to get in your way, but we were looking for a spot to shoot this last scene of the day, and this one’s perfect.”
“You’re shooting a movie here?” Will asks.
“Most of it was shot in L.A., but we have a few scenes taking place in more rural areas, and Missouri is dirt cheap. Anyway, don’t let us bother you.”
As he walks away, Owen turns to Will. “That’s so exciting.” He lowers his voice to say, “Not as exciting as what I was about to do to you, but still. Can we stay to watch?”
“Sure.”
Owen slides over to sit next to Will, their shoulders touching. They watch the crew setting up the equipment, half of which Will has never seen before.
“You could have been a movie star,” Owen says.
“Me? I don’t think so.”
“With your cheekbones? For sure.”
“I think it takes a bit more than that, but I appreciate your support.”
“I’m sorry that we’ve gotten in your way,” a young man says as he comes over. “Our director has a thing for finding just the right location.”
“That’s okay,” Owen says. “Are you his assistant?”
The young man, who Will can’t help but notice is beautiful, stands a bit straighter. “I’m acting in the movie, actually. My first big role. Well, I’m not the lead or anything, but it’s a strong supporting role.”
“Oh, wow! You must be so excited.”
The young man beams. “Yeah, it’s awesome.”
“I’m Owen. This is Will. I was planning on showing him some classics, actually. We have a lot of ground to cover.”
“Nice. Which genre?”
Will can’t help but tense at the question. Owen clears his throat. “Gay cinema.”
“Gay… oh.” The young man watches them closely, then he runs a hand through his curly hair. “I can recommend some movies if you’d like.”
Owen smiles. “Shoot.”
“The Boys in the Band is great. Maurice. Longtime Companion. Querelle… hmm, there are others I saw, but I don’t think they have them on VCR, and they won’t be shown anywhere here.” He gives a few more titles before stopping to take a breath. “Sorry, that was a lot.”
“No, those are great,” Owen says, seeming in awe. “I’ve seen some of them, but I also have a lot of ground to cover. What’s the name of your movie?”
“High-Life, but it might change. I’m Jonah, by the way. Jonah Carter.”
“We’ll remember your name,” Owen says. “Looking forward to seeing you in blockbusters.”
Jonah smiles through his blush. “That’s the plan. Be seeing you.” He turns to leave, then stops and quietly says, “You’re a very cute couple.”
As he leaves, Will lets the word couple play in his head. He likes the sound and feel of it, but it also scares him, because he knows the ramifications it can lead to. But hasn’t he been braver today than he has been in years? He feels there’s a bit more bravery left in him. “Are we a couple?”
Owen turns his head to face him. “Well, in my head we are, but my head doesn’t always get things right. I’d be happy to make it official, at least between us.” He takes a breath. “Will Thomas, would you be my sweetheart?”
Will huffs a laugh. “You mean your boyfriend.”
“Who is also my sweetheart. And my muse.”
It’s almost funny to Will, who is used to living with doubts and hesitations, that something so monumental can be so easy to answer. “I’d be happy to.”
He gathers the courage to do something he’s never done before in public, not even with Joel. He leans forward and kisses Owen. In front of strangers. For the whole world to see.
He no longer gives a damn.