Chapter 2
CHAPTER TWO
SAVANNAH
April
“I’m going to grab another box!” I yell over my shoulder as I go toward the door. Miguel’s trunk is half empty, but there is another batch waiting at Becky’s family’s house. I’m just grabbing a box when I feel my phone vibrate in my pocket. Cursing silently, I switch the box to one hand and pull out my phone, but the damn thing falls out of my grasp, so I have to crouch down and grab it.
“Hello?”
“Savannah, hi. Do you have a moment to talk?”
“Mr. Miles, hi,” I breathe, slightly winded. “Sure. How is it going?”
“Good. I just stopped at your house like you asked me to, and everything looks good.”
My brows pull together. “Really? You sure?”
From the corner of my eye, I can see a flash of red.
“What are—” Becky stops when she sees me talking on the phone and mouths, “Sorry.” I give her a reassuring smile as I listen to my landlord.
“Yes, I tightened the pipe, but everything looks okay. So I wouldn’t worry about it.”
“Okay, thank you so much for doing that, Mr. Miles.”
We say our goodbyes, and I slide my phone back in place.
“What was that about?” Becky glances at me as she grabs her own box.
“There was a leak in my bathroom, so I asked my landlord to give it a look, but he claims everything is in order. But for a few days I’ve been noticing little patches of water after I shower, and it’s not where the door is, but more to the side? I don’t know.”
“That is weird. Do you want me to see if Miguel or my brother can look into it?” she asks as we make our way into the house.
“No, it’s fine. He said he tightened the pipe, so I hope that will fix it.”
I knew they had their hands full, and I didn’t want to add my problems to theirs on top of everything.
“Are you sure? It’s no prob?—”
“What did I tell you about carrying those?” Miguel glares at Becky as he descends the stairs, his hands landing on the box in her arms. He tries to pull it out of her grasp, but she isn’t letting go.
“I can carry it just fine by myself,” she protests, puffing at a strand of hair that fell from the messy knot on top of her head.
“But why would you carry it when you have me to do it for you?” He flexes his arms pointedly. “I’m not working on those just to look pretty, Red.”
I move past them into the kitchen and exchange a look with Kate, who just shrugs, and continues putting away the dishes into their designated spot. Being childhood friends, I guess she was used to their antics by now.
“I thought you were working on those so your coach wouldn’t rip you a new one?” Becky quirks an eyebrow. “Besides, don’t you have to get your ass in the truck and go pick up that enormous couch you wanted?” She bats her eyelashes innocently as she pulls the box closer to her chest and carries it to the counter.
The frown between Miguel’s brows deepens as he watches her every move like a hawk.
The two of them used to be high school sweethearts, but they broke up in college, only to be reunited this past summer since Kate and Emmett, their mutual friends, were getting married, and they were supposed to be the maid of honor and the best man. Now, not even a year later, Becky and Miguel were back together, engaged and moving into their brand-new home they purchased a few weeks ago. Still, after all that time and everything they’ve been through, some things didn’t change.
Miguel turns to Kate and then me, pointing his finger at us. “Don’t let her carry any more heavy boxes.”
Becky rolls her eyes. “You’re insufferable, Fernandez.”
Miguel marches to Becky and grabs her face before plastering his mouth to hers. He devours her as if they’re all alone in the room. My cheeks heat from intruding on their moment, so I look away.
I was glad that my friend had finally found her happiness, but I couldn’t deny that a part of me felt jealous. Both Becky and Kate were loved and cherished by their partners, so why couldn’t I find somebody like that?
Do you really think somebody can love you, Savvy?
My throat tightens as it always does when those intrusive thoughts cross my mind. I press my hand against my rolling stomach, the bile rising up my throat. I’ve been feeling nauseated for days now and even threw up a few times.
Did I catch a bug?
It didn’t feel like a stomach bug, but I couldn’t exactly pinpoint what was wrong with me. Maybe it was the fact that the end of the school year was just around the corner, and things were more hectic than usual. Which I didn’t mind per se. Staying busy helped keep my mind on what needed to be done instead of everything that had happened in the last few months. Like the fact that Grams was gone, and she left me her house. A house I haven’t set one foot in since her funeral.
The image of Grams’ still body lying in her bed pops into my mind, and a cold sweat washes over me.
Don’t think about it, Sav.
Focus on here and now. On helping your friend move in so she can start her life with the man she loves.
“I’ll see you in a little bit,” I can hear Miguel whisper to Becky. His large palms are still cradling her cheeks, and I can’t help but remember another set of hands. Hands that were framing my face, roaming my body, and bringing me pleasure unlike anything I’d ever experienced before.
“Don’t lift heavy things,” Miguel repeats, snapping me out of my thoughts.
Seriously, Sav? I shake my head, pushing the memories of that night to the back of my head.
Not giving her a chance for a swift comeback, Miguel leaves the room.
Becky’s teeth sink into her lower lip as she stares after him.
Kate nudges her with her hip as she opens one of the drawers and puts a couple of pots inside. “What’s up with him?”
Panic shines in Becky’s eyes. She quickly schools her features, but there is no hiding her pink cheeks. “What do you mean?”
“You know what I mean.” Kate gives her a knowing look. “He’s been on your ass for carrying those boxes all day long. It kind of reminds me of how Emmett was when…” The pot falls into the drawer with a loud bang . Kate’s lips part in a perfect ‘o’ as she straightens to her full height and points her finger at Becky. “ Oh my God! ”
I look between the two women, clearly missing something. “What?”
“Oh my God!” Kate repeats, shaking her head.
A guilty expression flashes on Becky’s face as she nibbles at her lip.
“Will somebody explain what the hell’s going on?”
“She’s pregnant!”
She’s… I turn to Becky. “What?!”
If possible, Becky’s face turns even redder. “I’m going to kill him.”
“You are! Oh my God, Becky!” Kate rushes toward her best friend, pulling her in a hug. “Congratulations! How long?”
“Eighteen weeks,” Becky pulls back and smooths her hand over her shirt, revealing a small bump. “It wasn’t that we didn’t want to tell you guys, we just wanted to make sure that everything was okay. We were actually planning to invite everybody over once we were moved in to share the news, but then Miguel had to go and ruin it with his constant worrying!”
“He’s just being overprotective.” Kate waves her off. “You better get used to it; it only gets worse from here on out.”
Becky turns from Kate to me. “You guys aren’t angry at me?”
“Of course not!” I go to her and wrap my arms around her. “This is amazing news, Becky. I’m so happy for you. After everything you’ve been through, you guys deserve this. When did you find out?”
A relieved smile spreads over her lips. “After the Super Bowl.” She turns to Kate. “You remember how we were talking about Kaylee and how you got a go ahead from your doctor and all? Well, that’s when it clicked that I hadn’t had my period in a while, and when I told Miguel he just freaked.”
Becky’s comment has me pausing.
Because when was the last time I had my period?
My period was usually all over the place. Sometimes, a few days early; other months, a few days late. It was unpredictable, to say the least, but it always came.
Not last month, though.
I frantically search my mind for the last time I had to buy tampons. Or hell, the last time I had cramps. My cramps were so strong some days that I could barely function, and oftentimes, if I didn’t take some pain reliever, I ended up spending that first day in bed.
Kate and Becky are still talking, their voices a distant buzz in my mind. I turn my back to them, trying to focus.
I remember having to leave school early in late February because my period snuck up on me, and I was in so much pain I could barely think. That was shortly before Grams…
I shake my head. I was not going there.
But if that was the last time I had cramps, that would mean I didn’t have my period for two months.
No . I lift my shaky hand, running it through my hair. That couldn’t be right. Because if I didn’t have my period for the last two months, that would mean that…
“Anyway, he all but dragged me into the store, and we bought the pregnancy test. How somebody hadn’t seen us, I’ll never understand, but here we are. Then the next morning I thought it was all just a dream, so I sent him to the next town over to buy a few more tests just to make sure I was actually pregnant.” Becky shakes her head, a soft smile playing on her mouth. “After I took the third one, he confiscated the rest of them away from me so I wouldn’t get tempted to do it again. But the whole situation just felt surreal and…”
“Do you have any of those left?”
Both women turn toward me, matching confused expressions on their faces at my interruption.
“Yeah.” Becky’s brows pull together. “They’re up in the bathroom. I remember putting them under the sink last ni?—”
I spin on my heels, not waiting for her to finish.
This isn’t real.
It can’t be real.
“Sav?”
Taking two steps at a time, I climb to the second floor and start pulling the door open until I find Rebecca’s bedroom. I’m loudly panting as I cross the space. Once I’m in the bathroom, I crouch down and yank open the cabinet under the sink, and sure enough, just like Becky said, a stack of five pregnancy tests is sitting there.
My throat bobs as I swallow.
Slowly, I grab one box in my hand and get to my feet. My gaze meets my frantic reflection in the mirror. I look like a madwoman—hair wild, face pale, pupils dilated.
This is all just in my head, right?
It had to be.
I was just late.
That’s all.
It wouldn’t be the first or the last time it happened.
It was just stress.
There is no way I could be pregnant.
Those stormy eyes boring into mine flash in my mind, reminding me of that night.
We used a condom, right?
Everything was blurry, but we had to have used it.
I couldn’t use hormonal birth control, so I always made sure the guy wore a condom.
My grip on the box tightens, crumpling the paper.
Don’t be a ninny, Sav. It’s just a plastic stick.
A plastic stick that can change my whole life.
But I couldn’t not know.
I rip into the box with shaky hands. It takes me a couple of tries before I manage to open it, and the pregnancy test falls into the sink. Taking it in my hands, I flip it from one side to the other until I figure out what to do.
Letting out a shaky breath, I squeeze the plastic stick and go to the toilet.
There is a loud knock on the door. “Sav?”
Becky.
Doing my best to tune my friend out, I concentrate on the task at hand. It seems like it takes forever before I finally manage to pee. Closing the lid, I place the test on the counter and wash up. That damn thing sitting next to me like a ticking time bomb.
“Savannah!” More knocking. “What the hell? What’s going on? Are you okay?”
My time was running out. Sliding my fingers through my hair, I force myself to look at the stick.
“Becky, maybe she needs a moment,” Kate chastises.
“She had her moment.” The door handle rustles as somebody, Becky probably, bangs against it. “If you don’t open this door immediately, I’m going to knock the…”
The door bursts open, and Rebecca stumbles into the bathroom, clearly startled by the whole ordeal.
Hazel eyes find mine, assessing me. “What are you doing? You just stormed out?—”
Her gaze falls to the counter.
On the test sitting there.
The big, fat plus sign shines brightly, although it’s barely been a minute since I took it, if that.
Rebecca’s mouth falls open as she stares at it before her head shoots up. “That’s not mine.”
“N-no.”
“You?”
I shrug helplessly, still unable to wrap my head around it.
“What’s going o—” Kate peeks over Rebecca’s shoulder, looking around the room, until she, too, spots the test. “ Oh! ”
“B-but… how? When?” Becky stutters, her eyes growing wide. “Please don’t tell me it’s with that douchebag of your ex. You cannot possibly be linked to that tool for the rest of your life.”
“No.” I shake my head adamantly. “You have to have sex in order to end up pregnant.”
“Well, that test clearly states you had sex!” Rebecca snorts.
There is no judgment in her voice, only pure curiosity. Still, I feel my cheeks heat at the accusation.
“Not with Mark. He…” My throat bobs as I swallow. “It’s not Mark’s.”
I watch as Becky blinks a few times as she processes my words. “Not— What?!”
I wince softly.
If this is how she reacted when she found out, what will other people say? My throat burns just thinking about it.
My family’s been the talk of the town one too many times in the past. But it’s not like I can keep this hidden forever. People will find out, and there will be gossip. This is Bluebonnet Creek, Texas, after all. There were some lovely people living here, but this was a small town and being pregnant and single wasn’t common. There would be questions and dirty looks.
Like mother, like daughter, the little voice at the back of my head taunts.
My vision turns blurry as my stomach rolls, and I run toward the toilet, dry heaving.
“ Shit, ” Becky curses as I fall to my knees and start throwing up, my loud retching filling the room.
This can’t be happening. It just can’t.
I grip the toilet seat as I throw up, my stomach convulsing in pain, my throat burning.
What the hell have I done?
I squeeze my eyes shut as I fight the retching, and I can feel tears fall down my cheeks.
Pregnant.
I’m pregnant.
My hair is pulled back, and something cold touches my neck, making me shudder as a hand soothes up and down my back. Becky’s gentle voice registers in my mind. “It’s going to be okay.”
But it won’t.
You think you’re so much better than me, Savvy? You just wait and see. The apple doesn’t fall far from the tree.
The hateful words from the past ring in my head—the words I thought I had forgotten in the last fifteen years, but, apparently, I was wrong.
I shake my head, pushing them back into the box and lock them inside.
I was nothing— nothing —like her.
I never would be.
We stay like that until my stomach is empty, and I’m drained, physically and emotionally. Kate hands me a new towel, and I wipe at my sweaty face.
“Are you okay?” Becky asks, brushing a damp strand out of my face.
I shake my head silently.
Becky and Kate exchange a look before my best friend asks gently, “Who’s your baby’s father, Sav?”
Rough fingertips skimming my skin.
A hard body pressed into mine.
A heated look holding me hostage as that low growl sent a course of electricity running all the way to my core.
Eyes on me, Blondie.
Just remembering it sends a shudder through me. Some days, I still dreamed of him. Of the way he held me as we slept together. I knew I should have left as soon as the deed was done, but it was too tempting to stay, to get lost in his embrace and forget all of my insecurities and worries. He was too tempting.
“I…” My tongue darts out, sliding over my lower lip. “I don’t know.”
Becky’s brows furrow. “What do you mean, you don’t know?”
“Exactly what I said.”
I was pregnant, and I had no idea who my baby’s daddy was.
“It was a hookup. I stopped at this hotel bar after I found Mark, well…” I wave my hand, not in the mood to bring him up again, especially not considering the murderous look in my best friend’s eyes. Becky never liked my ex, and even less after I told her what happened when I went to visit him in Houston. “Anyway. This guy was sitting next to me, we started talking and one thing led to another and…”
“You didn’t catch his name?”
“I didn’t want to know his name,” I correct, letting my hand drop. The motion knocks over the test, it falls down face first, the plus sign laughing at me. “It was supposed to be one night.”
Only now, it wasn’t. Not any longer.
Why is this happening to me?
“Hey.” Rebecca’s arms wrap around me, pulling me into a hug. “It’s going to be okay. You’re not alone in this; you have us.”
“She’s right,” Kate chimes in. She joins us, her hand landing on my forearm. “We’ve gotcha. Anything you need. We’ll help you.”
“Thanks, girls. I really appreciate that.”
Becky pulls back, nibbling at her lower lip before asking tentatively, “Do you have any idea what you wanna do?”
My hand slides down to my stomach, and I swear I can feel a flutter inside my belly. Rationally, I knew it was way too soon for the baby to move, but the idea gave me comfort.
A baby.
My baby.
Something of my own. Something I wanted so desperately my whole life, but never dared to hope for. Somebody to call mine.
I had it. For a little while, it was Grams and me. Our own little family.
Losing her, the only person who truly loved me, wrecked me to my core.
Could she see it wherever she was right now? Did she realize that she left me all alone, and this was some kind of sign?
Emotions swell inside of me at the thought of Grams. My eyes burn, my throat grows tight. What would she say to this whole thing? Would she be disappointed in me?
As soon as the thought crosses my mind, I push it back.
No, not Grams. She would have my back.
“I think…” I start, but my voice comes out groggy, so I clear my throat before trying again. “I wanna keep it.”