Chapter 5 – Elijah
5
ELIJAH
S he steps into the café, and I can finally pull away. This is the first time I’ve seen her up close since this relentless obsession took root within me. I feel it, this thing crawling in the back of my head, urging me to possess her entirely.
So vulnerable.
She is so beautiful, long, ebony hair, porcelain skin, doll-like face, and large amber eyes burning under my skin. Her gaze was all fire and flames, and I couldn’t stop thinking about them.
Her aura is ablaze, it’s fucking bordering on insolence. She’s confident, unapologetic and unrestrained.
Her father’s most feared soldier.
The woman who reads souls—why was I so proud of her for that?
There’s no doubt about her intellectual prowess; I’ve trailed her to university, attended her presentations on criminal psychology—she’s fucking brilliant and deadly.
Forbidden too.
But she’s my obsession and there’s nothing good about obsessions, nothing healthy nor logical. What’s dangerous is that I can’t stop watching her, hiding like a creep every time she’s alone. Making sure she’s safe enough and killing anyone who approaches her.
It might be considered stalking, but who cares? Is it really stalking if I just went there to look at her? Maybe but I prefer to call it surveillance.
I find a twisted amusement in the irony in that woman.
She’s exactly what her father envisioned her to be: strong and smart. But she’s not herself. I can sense it.
The time has come, and now that I know who to pursue, she’ll be useful before I possibly end her too, because nothing survives after catching my attention.
Certainly not my addiction.
She’s fierce, with immense potential, but she needs refinement, training. If she wants to succeed, she’ll have to work for it and earn it.
Zanae believed no one else knew the horrors those bastards inflicted upon her that night. She’s right, because we didn’t know how horrible it was.
She doesn’t remember me, nor Niko, nor Ben. But I remember her face, the pain, the trauma.
I remember the rage and fury I felt when I found her alone, her head resting on that other woman’s thighs. No one else was there.
I remember the feeling of her rigid body in my arms—her eyes lost in oblivion, drowning in blood, tears, and darkness.
My heart almost gave out.
I don’t fully understand why, but losing track of my obsession nearly destroyed me.
I think she doesn’t remember anything from that rescue mission. She just collapsed into my arms, her eyes desperately seeking mine through the cagoule I wore, though she couldn’t make out my face.
My beautiful chaos found refuge in the arms of the man who is obsessively consumed by her.
I need to dig deeper into what happened to her, because her gaze was vacant and hollow, as if her soul had retreated behind a shield to protect her from memories so horrific they could have been fatal for her.
We chased them after that, and that’s when we uncovered everything they did to me.
This organization has birthed something malevolent, something evil. I know this because I’ve paid the price for many years. The latest ‘gift’ arrived just two days ago: a necklace with a star pendant.
Receiving annual gifts related to my dead mother’s possessions is a fucked-up tradition. It began when I was 14, each year bringing something she had on her the week she disappeared and died. Only recently did I confirm that it was the same organization that harmed my obsession, my little Zanae.
Initially, I blamed her father for this too, but two years after the incident, I began shadowing the Lebanese, hoping to find more about those gifts and see how I could get my revenge on Elias.
Then I saw her eyes again. And I never left her shadow.
After all, she is my Little Nightmare.
We received confirmation that the organization was behind this, thanks to someone who may or may not be in our basement dying right now. Now I know who to hunt, and it’s the perfect timing to bring my beautiful Zanae closer to me. She might be the most interesting ally for this. And the most dangerous one too.
Leaning against the car, arms crossed, I watched Nikolai approach, cigarette between my lips, waves of smoke curling into the air around me.
“Zanae is holding up well,” he remarked casually.
“It was weird talking to her. It’s been way too long, I even forgot how fierce she was.”
He chuckled, taking a drag from my cigarette. “She is, she had a knife in hand when I met her in the cemetery the other night.”
A small, proud laugh escaped me. “Oh, it’s going to be hard.”
“Too late to back off now. We need her in this. Ben worked his ass off with Lévi to find a link to the organization, we can’t stop now. Plus, she’s thirsty for revenge too.”
I glanced out into the light, getting lost in its strange warm glow. “I intend to give it to her.”
Nikolai nodded thoughtfully. “You missed our sessions with Benny this week. What’s on your mind, Eli?”
“Her,” I replied way too easily.
She’s been haunting my mind for far too long. I barely even had a glimpse of her, but her image is etched into every part of my head. My men always kept her safe, but now I have her all to me, and it’s exhilarating. “She’s got a fire that could burn down this whole place. I just want to add a bit of fuel. You know me, I’ve got a little pyromaniac streak.”
“That girl will be the end of you, Elijah. She’ll bring a lot of problems,” Niko replied, laughin, almost happy that my biggest weakness was now our ally.
Ever since I laid eyes on her again in that cemetery weeks ago, she’s been living rent-free in my head. That’s the only problem about this non—stalkerish activity involving her.
“Masochist me will love it,” I said, smirking as if I’m already anticipating the suffering she’ll bring into my life and knowing I’ll love every moment of it.
“We need a solid plan. The organization is like a hydra—you cut off one head, and two more sprout up. And who knows who’s hiding in their ranks? It’s insane to think they’ve been operating for years without anyone trying to bring them down. Fucking bastards.”
I leaned back against the car, remembering clearly her hollow eyes the day I found her almost dead. “She’ll have her revenge.”
“You’ll have it too. And you didn’t answer. Why didn’t you go to the boxing base this week? Lévi waited for you, and Ben told me he had to rearrange his Saturday night just for you to punch him to death.”
“I had things to do,” I replied curtly, my mind still trailing Zanae. All week, I’d followed her. Everywhere. She seemed oblivious, lost in her own world with that girl Miranda and the child most of the time.
Not that it’s the first time I’ve shadowed her every move. It’s been some years now. Sometimes, she’d just turn around, as if she could sense my presence. And I’d smile.
My obsession was so aware of me.
But this week felt different. Because I knew I’d have her close to me at the end of it.
I might be her stalker after all? Fuck . I am clearly her stalker.
Nikolai looked back at me, mischief burning in his eyes. “Ben and I always imagined the day you’d have to see her. A lot of bets and an enormous fucking amount of money are riding on that, Eli.”
A dark laugh escaped my lips.
“That’s why I don’t like either of you, and tell that bastard of Ben to keep his nose out of my business.”
Niko shook his head in disapproval. “No chance. So, what’s the plan for the aftermath?”
I gazed at him, feeling the world turn bleak around me, devoid of color. “Chaos, Niko, fucking ashes. They’re going to regret every single move they made in their miserable lives.”
“Your definition of chaos is always so… gory .”
I shook my head, amused. “A lot of blood and agony, it’s artistic, not gory.”
“You’re so messed up.”
His laugh echoed between us. Deep and honest.
“Maybe,” I replied nonchalantly. I was messed up, I knew it. They messed me up, so it’s only fair for me to have my payback.
He suddenly pulled me into a side hug. “Happy birthday, brother.”
“Thanks, Niko.”
“Did you receive anything this year?”
I retrieved the star necklace from my pocket, analyzing every little detail about it. The sharpness, the bright reflection under the light around us, gleaming at every little movement. “As always.”
He examined it, worried, but not surprised, then met my gaze. “Someday your birthday will be different, I promise.”
I wasn’t so sure, and I doubted it would ever be better than this.
But hope wasn’t a luxury I could afford now.
Hope wasn’t a luxury I could never afford in fact.