CHAPTER 29
NERO ZANTHOS
Alone. I was getting into this relationship alone. Now so many things make sense. My foot sinks into the accelerator, wanting to get somewhere faster—even though I don’t know where.
I must have been completely blinded by the false sense that Nina would be different from everyone else around me. The certainty that she was someone I could trust with my vulnerabilities turned me into a fool.
She knew who I was. She knew where I came from and what it took to get here. She knew—and still… I shake my head, forcing myself to keep my eyes on the road even though all I want right now is to close them for just a second.
I replay my actions over these weeks we spent together. I can’t find a single moment that could’ve given her even the faint impression that she needed to lie to me, to hide things from me.
I’ve never dealt well with indifference. It triggers something I buried inside myself years ago and never went back for—the feeling of abandonment. And feeling indifference coming from Nina throws me into a vortex of hurt and rejection I don’t even recognize as my own.
It wouldn’t have taken much. She only needed to be honest, to answer when I asked—because I did ask. Several times. What was she waiting for to tell me she intended to move to another country for almost two years? For me to fall in love with her?
“Too late, damn it!” I shout, slamming my fist against the steering wheel.
Admitting to myself a feeling my body had been screaming all along—betraying me every time my eyes tried to hide it and failed. Only she didn’t see it. And now I understand it’s because she chose not to.
How she managed to look me in the eye and lie like that is beyond me. I take a turn I didn’t see coming without slowing down, the tires screeching violently. I can’t go home like this. I decide to pull over before I cause another disaster—tonight already has enough of them.
I get out of the car, frustrated and consumed by a suffocating sensation.
I walk aimlessly through the streets, trying to calm my mind and organize my thoughts.
Now that I’m closer to the island’s center, there’s movement, and passersby throw curious looks my way.
I don’t care. I just ignore them, internally blaming every person I cross for the situation.
I walk for what feels like an eternity without realizing my internal GPS has taken me to the nearest place of comfort. It’s no surprise it’s neither my parents’ house nor the still-impersonal apartment I bought.
The doorman greets me and receives a scowl and a barely growled good evening in return. I don’t wait for the elevator—exhaustion sounds appealing right now. Maybe then I can just take a shower and sleep.
I head for the stairwell door, to the doorman’s despair—he knows perfectly well that the only apartment I ever visit in that building is on the top floor. He looks at me as if I’ve lost my mind for choosing to climb all twenty floors on my own legs.
I lose count of the steps at 664. After that, it’s all a blur. When I finally reach the corridor outside the stairwell, it’s past three in the morning, and I hope the twins forgot the apartment door unlocked, as they always do, so I won’t have to wake anyone.
By luck or misfortune, they did. I kick off my shoes at the entrance and go up one more level to the bathroom, trying not to make much noise. My reflection shows more than exhaustion—disappointment marks every line of my face.
I turn on the shower, but I don’t stay under the strong, hot spray for more than five minutes. I dry off without much enthusiasm and open the guest bedroom door, still without a lightbulb since the last time I slept here.
The startled scream I hear when I lie down isn’t mine. I spring up like a coil.
“Fuck! What the hell is this?” Drako shines his phone flashlight straight into my face, blinding me.
“Turn that shit off, idiot.”
“What the fuck are you doing naked, lying on top of me, you animal?” he complains, lowering his tone when he realizes it’s just me.
I cover my face with my hands because the idiot doesn’t turn off the flashlight. He gets up and switches on a floor lamp I don’t remember seeing.
“What are you doing here this late, Nero?” Drako turns the dimmer, gradually raising the light until the whole room is lit. His eyes sweep over my body suspiciously and then fix on my face until one question pops out. “Do we need to go kill someone right now, or can it wait until morning?”
“Your ability to talk bullshit even when you’re barely awake is impressive.”
“You show up here in the middle of the night with that shitty face—what was I supposed to think?”
He sits back down on the king-size bed and throws two pillows at my face with force. They hit and fall; I don’t bother picking them up.
“Are you high? Get kicked out of your house?” he asks, turning his head toward me.
I roll my eyes and wave off his speculation.
“Because if you were kicked out, I’ll happily go out right now to celebrate.
Nero, you know—the wicked witch eats children.
She’s just fattening you up so she can roast you later. ”
“Shut up, man. Let’s sleep,” I ask, desperate for the bed.
“Hell no! Go find some shorts, or do I look like your girlfriend to sleep with a naked guy with a hard-on rubbing against my back?”
This time I hit him in the face with a pillow—hard. Not just thrown; slammed with everything my muscles can muster. The dull thud of a perfect hit is followed by his curse.
“Son of a bitch!”
“Possibly,” I say.
He tosses a pair of shorts at me from the nightstand.
“These clean, Drako?” I ask.
He looks offended before answering.
“And do I look like a pig?” I just roll my eyes and flop onto the bed, lying on the side closer to the corridor, forcing Drako to jump over my body to get back to his spot by the wall.
“You’re pissed because Nina decided to really fuck with you?” I nail him with the pillow again, square in the face, and he groans.
“Okay, okay,” he gives up trying to pry anything out of me and settles under the sheets. Not even a full minute passes in silence before his voice echoes in the dark. “But is Nina okay?”
“Yes,” I answer sharply, just to shut him up—though the word tastes like a lie in my mouth.