20. Ranger
Chapter twenty
Ranger
I know every corner of the Raines mansion now except those hidden areas, and that’s what I seek now. Zaden asked me to go in and do my thing, and I see what he’s missed. That’s the way we are. Back to back, fighting together. My weakness is his strength and vice versa. Every strangely perfect stone of this place scratches at a spot inside of me, teasing this unpleasant wrongness. It’s eerie, like a museum dedicated to the dying embers of the Raines Pop Princesses.
On the ground floor, there are four rooms dedicated to records, musical instruments, and posters. Lia’s rooms are up the other end of the house on the second floor.
Rooms that are out of the way.
Her room is as perfect as the rest of the house, though. An enormous bed with a white bedspread. A room fit for a queen. With nothing in here that is like her.
Lia is messy. She’s cute. She doesn’t do this austere elegance. I finger the lace curtains that frame the bed and inhale. The distinct lack of her scent is another giveaway.
This might be Lia’s room. It can have a big huge plaque on the front of her door, but this is not her space.
I carefully back out, unwilling to disturb the strange silence. I find the room I think is hers, judging by the intense smell of marshmallows. It’s a door I walked past twice before I saw it. The panel is half hidden, and the only reason I noticed it was a hint of light in the gap. I push the door open and step into the space. The room is saturated with her scent. There are pillows and a few blankets. This isn’t a nest, not really, but it’s the bare bones of one. I bet Lia doesn’t even realise she’ s built it.
I wander to the window and look down at the window seat. It smells like Mills in here, but when I look out, I see the Mirakill Mansion.
I brace my arm, and close my eyes, hating the pain she’s been in and wondering how the fuck she is this freaking lonely and how she’s survived.
“Why are the only safe places in this house the panic room and a room no one can find?”
I whirl around and go upstairs. I pause as I enter what must be China’s room. The three bedrooms take up the entire third floor. One room is dark, one is white, and the other is gold. This room, though, has more wear on the floor leading to it. It’s huge and dark, but perfectly elegant. Almost a mirror replica of Lia’s bedroom.
I pad through until I find another door and push it open. It’s a walk-in closet, but there are two more doors. I open the first to reveal a stunning bathroom. The expensive renovations show that it’s top of the range but barely used. There’s not even the memory of a scent in here. I pull the door shut. It’s got nothing I want to see. I open the second and frown when I uncover a set of stairs.
“Did not know there was an attic,” I murmur and walk up them. They are carpeted, and the walls are painted white.
I get upstairs and frown as the scent of paint intensifies. The attic is empty but for a single box. It sits there in the space, alone and lonely. Why leave a single box? I walk over to it and crouch, opening it up. Dust motes fly into the air. I pull out news articles, a photo of a guy I recognise as Andy Anderson. The next photo shows China with an infant with black hair in her arms.
“Now who the fuck are you?” I murmur. “Probably that little shit who tried to beat me up.” My attention slips to the huge drawing pad, and I bring it out and open it up.
There are dark drawings of stick figures and messy writing. Page after page is filled with nonsense and drawings that make me feel uneasy. I can’t put my finger on what it is, but this doesn’t look like the drawings of a healthy person.
I would bet my soul that this is China’s and not Lia’s. I flick through the pages and find Lia’s name repeated over and over, the words so aggressively written that at times it’s broken through the paper.
I replace everything in the box and close it up. I wander to the window and find it’s hidden by the single tree at the back of the house. You’d need to know it was here. Still, the light shines through, illuminating the space. I wander around the room and pause. On the floor is black paint, just a bit, but it’s a streak that looks like it continues up onto the walls.
I step back. The walls are all freshly painted. The carpet has been torn up. Everything has been removed. What were they trying to hide up here? I shiver and decide to leave .
I find Lia in the kitchen with Ianto. He’s pressed against her back, hands roaming over her body. She’s got her head tilted back and her mouth open. Her cheeks are pink, her breathing fast, and she is single-handedly the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen.
As I watch, Ianto’s hand slips down into her pants, and he strokes her. She arches her back and moans, her hips rising and falling as she meets every stroke he gives her.
I should walk away or join them, yet I find myself unable to move, helplessly hers.
As she falls apart, so, too, does my willpower, but I need to have a conversation with her. It’s important. I shake it off, trying to clear my head, but I go still when Ianto flicks me a ravenous gaze and slinks out of the room. I find I’m so hard I can’t move.
Lia comes to me, with no hesitation, straight into my arms.
“Lia,” I say, clearing my throat. “Did I ever tell you about my parents?”
Lia shakes her head. I bury my face in her hair.
“I don’t talk about them much, but I think you should know.”
Lia steps back and looks up at me, her eyes intent. The blue green colour is startling. It’s my favourite colour.
“You told me some. Foster parents and being naughty.”
“Ianto’s parents were bad people. I’m sure he’ll tell you one day. His gran is fantastic, but she wasn’t around when Ianto went crazy. My parents were happy. I had a childhood free of drama. The only thing I needed to worry about was what time to stop playing. But I was a wild kid.”
I take Lia’s hand and lead her out onto the porch and sit down. It feels easier to talk about it while I’m outside.
“When I was twelve, my dad got into some trouble, except we didn’t know. He kept it hidden, but he was an addict, Lia. He kept stealing and draining everything dry until there was nothing left. Even us. We had nothing left to give him. I can still remember his erratic behaviour and the weird things he would do.”
Lia squeezes my hand harder.
“My dad had an illness, and it turned him into a stranger where his drugs were more important than family, than his job or even having a roof over his head. He lost everything, and then, because he owed so much, he ended up pissing someone off and ended up dead. My mum, too!”
“I am so sorry, Ranger.”
“My foster mum got a job working for Zion, cleaning and cooking, and so I grew up around the club and patched in as soon as I was old enough. They became my family.”
“Thank you for telling me.”
I cover her hand with mine. “Lia-”
Lia’s smile is so full of joy that I break off, unsure how to continue this conversation.
“Oh, look, it’s Zaden. It’s okay, Ranger, I don’t think any different of you. You’re perfect. I promise, no matter where you come from, it doesn’t matter. Come on, Ranger, let’s go see what he’s got!”
I try to pull her back, but she bounces off, and as the scent of marshmallows lingers, I wonder if I should really say anything at all. Maybe I’m wrong.
But what if I’m right?
Valen bursts out of the bushes and chases Lia through the garden, while Zaden heads in my direction. He puts a box of cupcakes on the island and turns to me.
“Walk with me.”
I fall into step with him and follow him deeper into the house. He’s always had this power. When Zaden talks, people listen and do what he says. I’ve always listened.
“What did you find?”
I grin at him. “How do you know I found anything?”
Zaden grabs my shirt and drags me up close to him so our chests are touching. I lean into him, boneless.
“Alpha,” I murmur, why is it a plea?
He growls and bites my neck. The pain makes me weak.
“What did you find, Alpha?” Zaden growls against my throat and nuzzles the skin.
I’m weak and at his mercy. It’s hard to think. “Lots of things.”
“Do we need to practice speaking under pressure again?” Zaden teases.
I groan and stumble into him. We both crash into a wall, but he holds me up. His mouth finds mine and drowns me in him.
“Zaden,” I whine, and then I can’t talk because he’s kissing me so hard I’m seeing stars, and I’m lost as his hands travel over my chest and down to cup my ass, dragging me up against him.
He pulls back and touches his lips to mine, just the lightest touch. The frenzy of a minute ago is gone. When he stills, his arms locked around my back, his cheek pressed to mine, I stay still, my throat swelling and closing.
“You came for me?”
“I could feel you hurting,” Zaden says simply. “I will always come for you.”
I squeeze my eyes closed, willing the emotion away.
“You told Lia about your dad?”
I tighten my arms around his waist.
Zaden touches his lips to my neck. Kissing me like I’m delicate, like I’m someone important.
“Did you tell her everything? ”
I clear my throat. “That I found him hanging from a tree in my favourite park? Fuck no. She doesn’t need the nightmares, Zaden. Besides, it was a long time ago. Ancient history.”
Zaden just holds me tighter. “I love you, Ranger.”
I go still, my breath frozen in my lungs because no matter how many times I hear it, it still stuns me stupid that a man that is as incredible as Zaden could love me.
“You and Ianto are my broken boys. I’m not going to let anyone hurt you anymore.” Zaden pauses, and his scent gets stronger, full of guilt. “I’m sorry you got hurt.”
I squeeze Zaden to me harder. “It wasn’t your fault, Zaden.”
“I looked everywhere for you,” Zaden whispers. “I couldn’t feel you.”
Guilt rises, but I push it down. “I didn’t want you to feel my pain, Zaden. You don’t need that.”
“Damn you, Ranger,” Zaden whispers. “Don’t you ever do that to me again. You share everything. I never want to not feel you in me again. Do you understand me?”
“Even if it hurts?” I whisper, my heart aching.
“Especially if it hurts.”
We stand that way for a long time, just holding each other. Eventually, I tell him everything I found.
Zaden kisses me again, softly, and tells me it will be okay. Then asks me to go find Lia.
I leave him standing in the hallway of the mansion, staring out the window, his whole body illuminated by light. I know if anyone can sort this out, it will be Zaden.
I have faith in him. We all do.
He’s Zaden Mirakill.