Chapter 86
Iwould never get sick of watching my cock disappear into Milo’s tight, perfect ass.
Even if I lived a long, full life, it wouldn’t be enough time with him. So, for the hours leading up to what I knew might be my last chance to be close with him, I took full advantage.
It wasn’t fair.
It wasn’t fucking fair that this was probably the last time I would get to be inside him. Feel his hot body wrapping around me and welcoming me home with each thrust.
I reveled in the way his wet, warm hole parted for me as I drove deep, my fingers leaving little clusters of bruises on his hips as I pulled him back into me so I could hit that spot inside him even harder.
I loved everything about being with him.
I loved the way he let out soft, muffled cries into the pillows as he allowed me to take out all my rage and pain on him.
The way he started to pant and gasp like he always did right before he was about to come.
The feeling of his hot, hard cock convulsing in my palm as I wrapped an arm around to stroke him through it.
The little whimpering ‘I love you’s’ that he blessed me with as my own cock finally spilled deep inside him… claiming him. Marking him from the inside out as fucking mine.
It didn’t take long for him to fall asleep in my arms after we’d finished. I stroked his hair back as he rested on my chest, hating how unfair it was that we were in this fucking situation to begin with.
Anger, sadness, and a simmering possessive need to protect Milo bubbled deep in my gut, and despite the rough, explosive sex we’d just had, I wasn’t feeling any calmer.
The old Jay had never wanted to kill anyone.
He’d never been a violent person.
He’d just wanted to mess around in his father’s lab and invent shit. Maybe play some cozy games to wind down and live a more or less uneventful life.
But now… Now I was filled with so much hatred and a bloodlust that I wondered if Luke really had been successful with his work on me.
If I managed to kill Luke tonight, it wouldn’t be out of necessity.
I would revel in it.
I wanted him to die. I craved the feelings of pure, unadulterated joy I knew I would feel if I ever had the chance to watch the light bleed from his eyes.
It was bad enough that he’d killed my father and fucking mind raped me… but he was a threat to Milo, and for that, he needed to fucking die.
Unable to sleep when I knew we were only a few short hours away from a full-blown tactical assault, I gently rolled Milo off of me and quietly slipped into the bathroom to wash up and get ready.
After cleaning myself up, I prepared a warm, damp cloth and wiped my sleeping man down, being careful not to wake him up as I gently patted him dry.
“They’ll be here soon. The last ping I received put them close to a cell tower roughly twenty minutes out,” NOVA whispered.
I huffed in response, pulling on the gear I’d laid out earlier for just this occasion.
My harness held two handguns, and I had two more strapped to my legs in thigh holders. My MP5 hung from a strap across my chest, and I secured it against my hip with two snaps around the barrel so it didn’t swing when I moved.
I had several small throwing knives in my harness as well as a garrote laced through my belt loops.
Each of my boots had tactical knives strapped in them, and nearly every single pocket was stuffed with backup ammo.
The last few items to go on were my mask and Milo’s tiny chilli pepper key chain.
I secured the little enamel charm to one of the D-rings on my harness and gave it a little tug to make sure it was secure.
Remembering how my stomach had erupted with butterflies the day he’d given me that silly charm, I nearly smiled.
After all the work Milo had been doing to get my head back together, it was easier now to remember the times we’d been happy on that campus.
It was easier for me to identify what was real and what wasn’t, and though I knew he would never be able to completely put me back to the way I was, he made me feel like this new version of myself was still good, too.
I think I would have been able to be happy again one day, if given the chance to settle down with him and heal.
But of course, that wasn’t going to be an option.
Because of fucking Luke.
“If I die, make sure you get Milo in that safe room,” I said to NOVA.
“I’m not promising that, Jay. If you die, there’s nothing that’s going to stop him from going to you. Especially not a disembodied voice from a speaker.”
“You’re more than that, NOVA,” I whispered, and I swear, if she had eyes, she would have rolled them.
“How about you just don’t die, okay? Then no one needs to make promises they can’t keep.”
I let out a dry laugh, adjusting my mask slightly to make sure it was secure.
“I’ll see what I can do,” I muttered, and she snickered softly in my earpiece as I went to wake up the love of my life so we could go to war.