Chapter 17
Zara
Dear Sandra,
Remember when we thought we would become backup dancers in music videos and become the queens of MTV and VH1, even though neither one of us could dance very well? I still remember all those Janet Jackson videos we watched. Those were good days. I miss those days.
I miss you.
Zara
”Okay, guys, watch the TV,”I say to Luke and Charlotte as I put on some cartoons and grab my phone. I head toward the bedroom and close the door. I take the phone number that I grabbed from the street out of my bag and call it before I can change my mind. I do not have time to debate back and forth in my mind if it’s a bad decision to make this call.
The phone rings twice before a young, perky female answers. ”Hello. Thank you for calling the Titanium Club, New York”s most discreet members-only venue. How may I help you?” Discrete venue?
”Hi.” I bite down on my lower lip and close my eyes, even though I want to hang up.
”How can I help you?” she says impatiently.
”I saw an ad for a job,” I mumble.
”Awesome. What’s your name?”
”Zara,” I say. ”Can I ask what the job is?”
”Can you start tonight?”
”Um, can I start tonight? Is there not an interview or…” My voice trails off.
”The interview”s on the job.”
”Sorry, what?” I”m confused by her statement.
”You come in, and we will put you in one of the positions. If you do well, you have the job. If you don”t do well, you don’t.”
”Oh, okay. Will I be paid for…?”
”You”ll be paid for the night, and then we”ll tell you if you can come back tomorrow, or we”ll pay you and tell you to never come back again,” she says. ”Sound good?”
”The flier said I can make about fifteen hundred a night. Is that correct?”
”Yeah, depending on how well you do. Let me give you the address. Come in, and we”ll talk more.”
”Okay. What time should I be there?”
”Come around eight p.m.”
”Okay. Thank you.”
She hangs up before I can say anything else.
”I think I just got a job,” I mumble to myself, not feeling super excited. ”I just got a job.” I walk over to the mirror and stare at my reflection. “But what is the job, Zara?” I touch the sides of my face and then head toward the door to make sure the kids are not getting into trouble. They”re watching a cartoon I”ve never seen before, and right now, I”m not going to check it out to make sure that it”s appropriate for them either.
I pick up my phone to call Lila to see when she will be back and see that I have a message from an unknown number. When I open the message, I see an address I assume is where I’m headed tonight.
”Hey,” she says, whispering into the phone, ”I can”t talk right now.”
”What”s going on?” I ask her. “You’ve been gone a really long time. Are you okay?”
”Oh, Zara,” she groans, sounding defeated. ”It”s really bad. Really, really bad.”
”What’s happened?”
”Can I speak to you tomorrow? Hank and I are trying to work a miracle,” she whispers.
”Tomorrow? You”re not coming back tonight?”
”No. We have an emergency cast meeting to try and stop the review from coming out.” She is serious, and my heart sinks. “Shit has hit the fan. The review is not as good as Hank thought it would be.” She pauses. “Why? Do you need me to come back tonight? Is everyone okay? Is…”
”It”s fine,” I say. ”Everything”s fine. Good luck tonight. I’m sorry about the review.”
”Thank you, Zara. Love you.”
”Love you too,” I say and press End on the call. ”Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck,” I mumble under my breath. ”How is this happening to me again?”
I call Elise, but of course, the phone just goes to voicemail. I”m going to have to give her a piece of my mind when she gets back. I don”t mind looking after my niece and nephew, but this is ridiculous. I then call my neighbor to see if she can babysit. It”s my last chance to get someone to look after the kids, but the phone just keeps ringing.
”Shit,” I say to myself.
I don”t know what I”m going to do. After the conundrum that happened at Rosser International, I don”t want to take the kids with me to another job interview. It”s not like it worked out well for me the first time. ”But it”s fifteen hundred dollars,” I mumble to myself. Even if I only last one night, it’s still fifteen hundred dollars, and as long as I don”t have to sleep with anyone, I”m willing to do almost anything that’s not physical for the money. I”ll even strip off some clothes if I have to. I just won”t strip off all my clothes. There’s no way I’m going to have my pussy lips hanging out for the world to see. There”s no way I’ll shake my naked breasts either. I’m not confident in my body and don”t want the fifteen hundred dollars that badly. I need to be able to look myself in the mirror the next morning.
”Hey, Luke, Charlotte,” I say as I walk into the living room and study their faces.
”Yes, Aunty, Zara?” Luke says, and they slowly avert their glances from the TV to me. Their movements are slow, and their eyes look heavy. It”s been a long day. ”I have a possible job that”s going to pay me good money. But I don’t have a babysitter tonight. If I give you both a candy bar, do you promise, and I mean you have to promise that when we get there, you”ll be good and just sit and sleep or read a book?”
”I promise, Aunty Zara,” Charlotte says, nodding.
I look over at Luke. I know he”s the one that would be the problem.
”I”ll be good,” he says, nodding solemnly. ”I won”t get in trouble again, Aunty Zara. I promise.”
”Okay,” I say. ”Normally, I wouldn”t take you guys. I know it”s not the most fun just sitting around and waiting, but your mom is out of town on that job thingy.” I try not to roll my eyes. ”And Aunty Lila is meeting with castmates about the play, which I think might be ending soon… I mean, it might not be ending soon. Don”t tell her I said that, but if the review is as bad as I think it”s going to be…” I grimace. ”Then I don”t think this is the break any of the cast thinks it”s going to be.”
”What do you mean?” Charlotte says. ”Like a Kit Kat break?”
”No,” I say, shaking my head. ”But do you guys want a Kit Kat?”
”I want a Kit Kat,” Luke says. ”I”m the Kit Kat monster.” He jumps up and moves his arms back and forth like he”s a gremlin. I”m the Kit Kat monster, and I want a Kit Kat and a Hershey Bar and a Milky Way, and…”
”I think one Kit Kat is fine.” I press my lips together.
”I want a Kit Kat too and a Milky Way and Hershey Bar,” Charlotte says. ”And…”
”Guys?” I shout, and they both stop. I wonder if I”m making a mistake. I wonder if I should just call off the whole thing. I don”t have to go in for the job. I can start looking again tomorrow.
”But it”s fifteen hundred dollars,” I whisper. ”For one night of work. Guys, go and get dressed. Okay?”
They look at me and nod solemnly.
”Change out of your pajamas and put on some real clothes.”
”But I don”t want to put on real clothes. I”m comfy in my pajamas,” Charlotte says.
I take a deep breath but don’t have the energy to argue. ”Fine. You guys can come in your pajamas. Just put on some jackets. I don”t want people seeing you in your pajamas, okay?”
”Okay,” Luke says. ”Come on, Charlotte, let”s get our jackets. And Aunty Zara?”
”Yeah?” I ask him.
”Don”t forget the Kit Kats.”
”I won”t,” I say, rolling my eyes as I head to the kitchen and open the cupboard.
I open the blue tin that contains all the candy, pull out a Ziploc bag full of Kit Kats, and put it into my handbag. I”ll bring more than one just in case I need to bribe them with multiple Kit Kats to stay quiet.
I head back into my bedroom and look in my closet. What does one wear to a discrete venue? I think I need to find something sexy to wear. I can”t believe that I”m doing this. I can”t believe this is my life. I take a deep breath. It”s just one night, Zara, and you”re doing it for your family. You”re doing it so you don”t have to do something with nasty Frankie. I shudder at the thought.
I grab a black dress and a push-up bra and then head to the shower. I”m going to make sure that I shave just in case I do have to take off some clothes, and I”m going to put on a full face of makeup so that I won”t feel as naked and exposed as I”m likely to feel when I arrive.
We arrive a few hours later, and I head to the side door. ”Hi. I”m here for the position,” I say to the bouncer who looks at me and then the two kids.
He”s silent but raises an eyebrow as he opens the door, and I head inside.
”Hi,” I say, walking up to a lady with long, dark hair.
”Hi, can I help you?” She looks at me and then looks at the kids. ”You do realize this is a private club? You”re not allowed to have…”
”Please,” I say. ”It”s just that I couldn”t get anyone to babysit for me tonight, and I really need this job. And the lady on the phone said I had to come tonight, and it was really last minute and…”
She sighs as she looks me up and down. ”They can sit in the dressing room, but they have to be good,” she says.
”They”ll be perfect.” I stare at them. ”Right?”
”Yes, Aunty Zara,” they say in unison.
”Okay, come with me,” she says. She leads me to a dressing room that is filled with scantily clad women. I see a sofa and put my handbag down and turn to the kids.
”Hey, Charlotte, Luke. Can you sit here, please?” I hand Luke my iPad.
”Yes, Aunty Zara.”
”I”m going to give you the candy bag, and you can have a Kit Kat each. I”m just going to work for a little bit. You”re not to talk to anyone. You”re not to touch anything. You”re not going to do anything but sit here, okay?”
”Okay.” They nod solemnly.
”And then we”ll go home.”
”Okay,” they say, but Luke is already playing on the iPad.
”Who”s new?” a tall lady calls out from the other side of the room, and I kiss Charlotte and Luke quickly and head over to the side. “I’m Padma.”
”Hi,” I say, holding up my hand. I”m Zara, I”m new.”
”Nice to see you.” She looks at me and then greets some of the others. Four other women nod their heads, and she points at us and tells us to follow her to a corner.
”So, the five of you are all new today. You”re going to start in our entry room.”
”What”s that?” a tall redhead next to me asks; we exchange glances and small smiles. She’s skinny and beautiful, but I can tell she’s nervous as well.
”You”ll just be dancing on tables. Nothing too crazy,” Padma says. ”However, you”re all going to need to change.”
”We are going to be wearing clothes, right?” I ask, praying to God I”m not going to have to dance in the nude.
”Yeah, we”ve got sparkly bustiers and some mini-skirts you”ll all be wearing.”
I let out a long sigh of relief. That wasn”t so bad. I could dance on a table in a bra and mini-skirt.
”What”s going to happen is Simon, the manager, will walk around. If he finds any of you particularly sexy or good dancers, you”ll be invited to the main room, where you”ll give private dances.”
”Is this like a strip club or something?” the redhead says again. ”Because not much information was given, and…”
”This is a discreet private club,” Padma says. ”That”s all you need to know.”
”But…” the redhead starts again.
”If you have any more questions, it might be time for you to leave.”
The redhead presses her lips together.
”I have a quick question?” I ask.
”Yes?” Padma glances at me with an annoyed look.
”I”m just wondering how we get paid and when we get paid and…”
”At the end of the night, you”ll all get one thousand dollars.”
”Oh, I thought it was fifteen hundred?” I say.
”It could be up to fifteen hundred dollars. It could be two thousand dollars,” she says. ”We”ll give you a thousand dollars a night just for doing whatever you have to do. The patrons may give you tips or more, depending on how much they like you and how much you do to gain their admiration will determine how much extra you make.”
”Oh, okay,” I say, biting my lower lip.
I”m not sure I like the sound of that, but I”m not going to say anything else. I”m pretty confident that I won’t come back after tonight, but I”m not going to say that. I just need the thousand dollars.
I look over at Charlotte and Luke, sitting on the couch, staring at the iPad screen I brought for them to watch cartoons on and eating candy. They look comfortable, and I am happy about that.
”So, you girls ready to get dressed? Come on.”
We all follow her to an armoire in the corner of the dressing room and pick out outfits. I realize that I feel totally out of my element. What am I doing? I think to myself as I put on the skimpy bra. I cannot think about it too much, or I know I”ll grab the kids and run out of there, and right now, I need that thousand dollars more than I need my dignity.
”This isn”t so bad,”the redhead says, shouting at me from a table about five feet to my right. Her hands are in the air, and she’s shaking her hips like she’s enjoying herself.
We”re both dancing, swinging our hips to the Top 40 music that”s playing. It”s dark, and I can barely see anything in the room. I dance back and forth, conscious of the fact that my boobs are bouncing and practically falling out of the side of the bra.
”Hey, you two, you’re doing a good job. You’re both good dancers. We”re going to change rooms now.” Padma stops next to the tables. ”Remember, no talking.”
”Thank you,” I say, smiling, not sure if I am happy about that.
”You”re welcome, but it”s not me you should be thanking. It”s the men. If they like you…” She smirks. ”That”s when you see the real money.”
”Oh, okay,” I say as I get down off the table and try to adjust my skirt so it’s covering my ass fully. We follow her through to another room. This new room is much larger and slightly brighter and I can see tables of men sitting around drinking, chatting, smoking cigars. Some are playing poker, some are reading papers, which I find odd because it”s the middle of the night, and many are just chatting.
”So you”ll just dance around the room.” Padma gestures around with a sweeping gesture of her hand. ”If a man stops you, that means he wants a drink. You”ll go to the bar.” She points to the corner. ”You”ll order it, give the bartender the table number so he knows who to bill, and then you”ll take the drinks back.”
”Oh, is that it?” I’m surprised.
”That”s it,” she says. ”Unless someone asks you for more.”
”Oh, okay.” I don”t want to ask her what sort of things they may ask for because I don”t know that I want to know.
”Okay, go and mingle,” she says. ”I”ll come and get you if I need you for anything else.”
”Okay,” we say at the same time. The redhead and I look at each other. She makes a face. ”This is kind of crazy, huh?”
”It doesn”t seem so bad just yet.” I shrug.
”Are you out of your mind?”
”What do you mean?” I ask her.
”The men can ask us for anything they want.”
”What?” My jaw drops.
”You didn”t know?” she says, raising a single eyebrow and staring at me.
”No, I mean, this doesn”t look like a brothel or anything.”
”Just because it”s not sleazy and cheap doesn”t mean it”s not a whorehouse,” she says. ”Trust me, be careful.” She leans forward into my space and whispers, ”And I”m only saying this because I saw you brought your two kids with you. Just be careful. And remember, you can say no.”
”I didn”t realize that this is that sort of place.”
”Shit. Padma’s staring at us. Good luck tonight,” the redhead says. And before I know it, she”s gone.
I cast my gaze around the room and begin to dance again, not sure what I should be doing. I feel like the training for this job hasn”t been that great. Though, what is there to train?
Within ten seconds, a man approaches me. ”Hey there, sexy.” He leers at me.
”Oh, hi. Can I help you?” I ask.
”Yeah, you can help me.” He looks me up and down and licks his lips. ”I like those jewels.”
”Sorry, what?” I frown at his comment, having no idea what he”s talking about.
”The jewels,” he says, looking toward my nipples, and then I remember the bustier I am wearing has rubies hanging from the nipple area.
”Oh, oh, yeah. Thanks,” I say. ”Can I get you something to drink?”
”Yeah,” he says. ”How”s about tequila? Two shots.”
”Okay, anything else?”
”That”ll do for now,” he says.
I head to the bar and stand there waiting for the bartender to take my order. ”What do you want?” an old man says, staring at me with a grimace.
”Two tequila shots, please.”
”What table?”
I stare at him for a couple of seconds. My mind is blank. I have no idea what table the guy was from. ”I”m not sure,” I say. ”I can go and…”
”Here”s two tequila shots. Make sure you get the table number next time,” he says, handing the glasses to me.
”Thank you,” I say with a smile, but he doesn”t smile back.
I head over to the waiting gentleman with a smirk on his face as I hand him the tequila shots.
”One”s for you, babe.” He smirks as he only takes one.
”Oh, thank you,” I say, not sure if we”re allowed to accept drinks.
”Here”s to tonight,” he says, downing his shot. He stares at me, waiting for me to drink.
”I”m not sure if I’m supposed to drink with guests.”
”Drink it,” he says. I down it, and he chuckles. ”Good girl. I like it when you”re good and obey.”
”Sorry, what?” I say, staring at him, my eyes wide. Had he just said he likes it when I obey?
”I like it when you obey.” He chuckles again. “You’re a good girl.”
”You don”t know me,” I say, wanting to run away.
”But I”m about to get to know you,” he says, as his hand snakes around my waist and reaches down to my ass. He squeezes my ass through my skirt and then whispers in my ear, ”Ten grand.”
Is this man seriously asking me if I”ll sleep with him for ten thousand dollars? I take a step back. ”No.” I shake my head.
”Twenty thousand?”
”I”m not sleeping with you for any amount of money.”
He throws his head back and laughs. ”Oh, I”m not propositioning you for sex, honey. I want your panties.”
”What?”
”I want your panties. Twenty grand. Slip them off for me right now, stuff them in my mouth, tell me I”m a bad boy, and I”ll give you twenty grand.”
My heart is racing. What sort of freaky-ass place am I in, and am I crazy for not immediately whipping off my panties and giving them to him? Twenty grand is a lot of money. Twenty grand would change my life, yet I don”t know that I”d be able to wake up tomorrow morning and feel the same way about myself if I did such a thing.
”And if you whip off that bra as well,” he says, leaning toward me, ”I”ll make it fifty grand.”
”I don”t think so,” I say, shaking my head, trying to ignore the voice in my head screaming at me.
His expression changes. ”What are you saying, slut?” He grunts. ”You think your panties and your bra are worth more than that?”
I look around in shock. Had this man just called me a slut? I can’t believe it. Who does he think he is? I’m ready to tell him off when I feel his fingers on my waist, sliding down toward my skirt. I reach down and squeeze his hand hard.
”Stop it. Now,” I say, looking at him.
”What?” I just want to see if those panties are wet.”
”Excuse me?” I glare at him.
”If the panties are wet, then I”ll make it a hundred grand. Why? You don”t want a hundred grand?” He looks me up and down. ”I”ll even let you sit on my face afterward.”
”I”m not giving you my panties or sitting on your face,” I shout at him and push him away from me. He’s about to grab me again, but before I know what”s happening, there”s someone next to me, grabbing the man by the collar.
”Listen to the lady and back the fuck up,” a deep voice shouts, and I freeze as I look over to the side.
It”s Jackson, and he looks furious. I can’t stop the shiver that takes over my body. Fuck. Why is this man always showing up everywhere? Even though I”m grateful he”s here to save the day again, I don”t know what to say. I don’t need him to save me. I was going to take care of this myself.
“Huh?” The creepy dude recoils.
”I said, leave the woman alone.”
”I just made an offer to buy her panties and…”
”I said to leave her alone,” Zeus growls.
The guy just shakes his head and walks away in a huff, muttering under his breath, ”Not even worth it.”
Jackson looks at me, and I’m frozen to my spot. I smile to myself as I realize that in my head, he”s still Zeus, even though I now know his name is Jackson.
”You think that was funny?” he asks, glaring at me.
”No, I don”t think it was funny,” I say, glaring back at him. ”I also didn”t need you to come over here and do that.”
”Why? You wanted the ten grand that badly?”
”I wasn”t going to do anything with him.”
”What are you even doing here?” He stares at my chest, and then his eyes narrow as they continue down my body to my short skirt.
”I am working here,” I say, continuing our stare-off.
”You”re working here.” He lets out a deep sigh. ”Is this a fucking joke? You”re working at a titty bar?” He is pissed.
“I didn’t know it was a titty bar,” I mumble, and I feel him grabbing my face and looking at me. ”
You make a lot of poor decisions, don”t you, Zara Hathaway?”
”No,” I say, sticking my chin out. ”I don”t.”
”You look fucking hot though. I”ll give you that,” he says, his eyes running down my body. He licks his lips and presses his lips to my cheek. ”Fucking hot,” he whispers in my ear.
“Um, thanks?”
”You’re fucking hot enough to eat.”
”You”re not going to eat me.” I’m defiant in my response to his comment.
”Why not? You seemed to like it when I ate you the first time, the second time, and maybe even the third time.”
I shiver as I remember his lips in my most private places. He”s right, of course. He made me come more than I”d ever come before in my life.
“In fact,” he says as he presses his lips to the side of mine. “We can go into a room right now and…”
“And what?” I say, moving my lips a hairbreadth so they”re pressed against his.
We”re locked in on each other; my heart is racing, and his fingers are running down the side of my arms. He”s got me pressed against the wall, and I can feel his heart racing in time with mine. I also feel the hardness in his pants against my stomach. I reach down and gently place my palm on the front of his pants with a slight bit of pressure.
”Fuck you”re sexy. I want you so badly right now.” I can tell he’s trying not to growl and keep some semblance of composure at this moment.
”I”m sure you do.” I go for sexy with my smirk, but when I chance a glance over his shoulder, I see Padma staring at me and I remember where I am and why I’m here. “I have to get back to work though.”
”Then let”s go,” he says, stepping back. ”Give me a lap dance and really make some money.”
“What?” He grasps my hand in his, leads me down a hallway to another area, and opens the door to what I assume is a more private area. There are couches strewn across the room in an array that reminds me of a furniture showroom. He walks over to a black leather couch in the corner and pulls me on top of him. I adjust myself and place a hand on his chest to steady myself as he repositions me so that I’m sitting on his crotch. His hands move to my ass and slip under my skirt. He looks so handsome sitting here, and I’m not sure what to do. I want him, but I don’t want to give him the satisfaction of knowing that. Before I know what’s happening, he pushes my skirt all the way up, and I can feel the cool air on my ass cheeks. His fingers snap the back of my thong, and I watch amusement take over his face.
I push his hands away and push his shoulders back into the couch before I start dancing in time to the music. He grins in satisfaction as I move back and forth on his lap, enjoying the feel of his hardness between my legs.
“You are so sexy,” he growls, and I feel his fingers on my stomach. I run my fingers down the exposed chest area of his open shirt and undo more of the buttons, loving the feel of his warm skin against me. I reach back, undo my bustier while keeping my focus on him, and drop it on the couch next to us. He immediately reaches up, palms my breasts, and then lightly squeezes them. I moan as he then pinches my nipples, causing me to gyrate faster on his lap. Our groans are the only noises I can hear in the room. His hands on my waist move me faster, and then he grabs my neck and pulls me down for a kiss. His tongue slips into my mouth, and my breasts bounce against his chest as we kiss. His fingers find their way between my legs, where he rubs my clit relentlessly.
He feels my wetness, and I can’t hide how turned on I’m finding this whole escapade. He reaches down and unzips himself, and moves his hardness against me. My movements become erratic, needing a release.
“I want to fuck you,” he whispers in my ear. I swallow the lump that has formed in my throat as his right hand runs down the side of my body and plays with my nipple.
”Will you let me fuck you again?” he asks before he presses his lips against mine again. One of my hands involuntarily reaches into his hair, playing with his silky locks as he kisses me. My other hand guides him inside of me, ignoring all the voices in my head, telling me this isn”t a good idea.
”Zara!” a voice screams inside the room, and I freeze. The redhead is there, and she looks harried. “There you are.”
“Yes.” I rush and try to cover my exposed breasts with one hand and remove my other hand from Jackson’s rock-hard cock.
”It”s your kids,” she says, shaking her head. ”The boy, he”s throwing up. I think you need to take care of him.”
I see the shock in Jackson”s eyes.
”You have your kids here with you? Are you fucking insane?”
I don’t have time to explain the enormity of the situation I’ve been put in. ”You don”t understand,” I mumble as I get off his lap and adjust my skirt.
”You are a shitty mother,” he says, shaking his head, and I can see the disgust on his face. He looks absolutely aghast, but he just doesn”t know me or my circumstances, and I”m not about to explain it to him.
”And you”re an asshole,” I say, pushing him away. ”You are an absolute asshole.”
”And to think I was about to screw you again,” he says, shaking his head. ”Maybe I need my head checked.”
”Fuck off.” I grab the bustier and cover my chest as best as I can. ”Just fuck off,” I tell him one more time for good measure.
He looks at me in shock, and I hurry away from him, out of the room. I hope I never see him again. I can”t believe I nearly had sex with him. Again. In a place like this. Maybe I need my head checked as well.
I rush into the dressing room to check on Luke and Charlotte. ”Are you okay? What”s wrong?” I ask, fear in my voice.
”I think I ate too many Kit Kat bars,” Luke says, making a face. ”I”m sorry.”
”It”s fine,” I say, taking a deep breath, trying not to swear. ”I”m the one that”s sorry. I never should have brought you guys here.” Because I do agree with Jackson about one thing. It was stupid to bring them there. I may not be their mother, but I am making poor decisions with them. The need for money made me forget my common sense, and I know I need to stop making poor and rash decisions. “Come on,” I grab their hands, “let me change, and then we’re going home.”