40. Ava
AVA
I t’s official. I’m screwed.
Against my better judgment, I’ve gone and fallen in love with Levi Cross, and there’s not a single thing I can do to stop it.
He winks at me across the room, where he’s speaking with Christian and Paulina. Neither of them seems to notice that his eyes haven’t left me for the last twenty minutes.
As if he knows I’m thinking about what he did to me in the shower earlier, his gaze travels over my body, down the emerald green silk of the dress he picked out. I’m sure it cost a fortune, and I’ve been wary of getting even a speck of dirt on it the entire night.
Heat travels through my blood. It’s insane. I just came three times this afternoon, and yet, I want him again. I always want him. It’s like my libido is on steroids, and nothing can satiate the hunger burning inside me.
Shifting nervously from foot to foot, I turn away, my cheeks hot to the touch. I’m trying to pay attention to what Bella and Mila are saying. I just can’t. It seems I can’t focus on anything other than what I want Levi to do to me, and it’s turning out to be a real problem.
It’s Oak Ridge’s Annual Christmas Party, and the ballroom is packed. Crowded with wealthy guests who spend their holidays here.
Bella and Mila did a phenomenal job. I just don’t think large parties are for me. Especially surrounded by enough wealth to purchase the state of Washington.
I sip my champagne and mingle. Do my best to ignore Levi Cross staring me down across the room, but it’s no use. I’m enthralled with him. Like we’re two magnets drawn together.
Life has been . . . strange. It’s been a week since I was chased, and a week of constant whiplash. One moment, he’s laughing or fucking me. The next, he’s quiet, lost in thoughts he refuses to clue me in on.
I can’t escape the feeling that he’s hiding something from me. Something about my past that he doesn’t want me to know. I don’t want to believe that he could be lying.
—I’m also realistic.
Even if I’m falling for him, he’s still hiding a piece of himself, and I’m struggling to decide if I’m willing to accept him without that missing piece or if I need it all.
I’ve never been in love. To me, love is accepting another person for all their flaws. Every negative characteristic. Every curse or sin. It’s trusting someone to love you so completely that you can show the ugliest parts of yourselves, knowing they’ll take those parts and make them beautiful.
With each passing day, I find myself wondering what could have happened to make him shut the world out. If he’ll ever really let me in, or if we’ll continue this song and dance for the rest of our lives until one of us gives in or ends the contract.
Something tells me it won’t take long.
His gaze finds mine across the room, and I can’t fight the longing in my chest to go to him. I want to be by his side, on his arm. We’ve spent most of the evening together, but it’s not enough.
I want to be in his bed with him on top of me, making me come until I can’t remember my name.
Holding his gaze, I look back at his sister and Mila.
Then, I start heading for the back hall of the lodge.
I’m only out of sight for a second when I feel his presence.
“Miss me, baby girl?”
I don’t answer him, instead, turning and raising to my tiptoes before crushing my lips to his.
He groans, his hands instantly coming to my hips before slipping lower to cup my ass.
His tongue collides with mine, and he pushes me back into the wall like he doesn’t give a single fuck about where we are or who could see us.
“Fuck sweetheart,” he rasps against my neck.
“I want you,” I breathe, my head falling back to give him more access when he sucks on the pulse point below my ear. It feels so good that the heat already rushing through my veins turns to a full-on ache.
“Thought we were going to wait until tonight? Make it last?”
I shake my head, reaching between us to cup him through his pants. He hisses out a curse under his breath when I find him long and hard.
“I don’t want to wait,” I breathe, nipping the scar on his lip when he lifts his mouth back to mine.
His gaze searches mine for a moment, almost sinister. Like he’s captured heaven in the palm of his hands and now he’s planning to ruin it for anyone but himself.
In a lot of ways, he already has.
“You’re dangerous, Ava Lynn,” he mutters gruffly.
My stomach bottoms out at his words, my body hot and feverish. This is absolute madness, but I blame him for my lack of self-control where he’s concerned.
I don’t know what’s gotten into me, but I need to feel his hands on me. I need him to claim me.
Mostly, I just need him to fuck me and remind me who I belong to.
Hauling me to him, his lips crash against mine, and he lets out a groan. Hoisting me up into his arms, his hands fist the material of my dress. Anyone could walk around the corner and see us, but I’m past caring. I know he won’t let anything happen to me.
“This dress . . .” he rasps. “I want to fucking burn it.
“Don’t,” I whisper in between kissing him and slipping my tongue along his scar. I’ve found he secretly likes it, and when he shivers, a rush of triumph consumes me. “I like it.”
“I’ll like it better when it’s on my floor tonight,” he rasps, nipping and sucking a path up the side of my throat.
I arch in his grasp, pressing myself against him, and he chuckles darkly in my ear. He pulls back, cupping my face with his fingers.
“You’re so fucking perfect . . . ”
My breath gets caught in my throat when he searches my face. It’s right there on the tip of my tongue, but I know admitting it out loud makes it real. Too real.
“Levi . . .”
He lifts a hand, slow and deliberate, and tucks a loose strand of hair behind my ear with a tenderness that feels completely at odds with the darkness in his gaze.
“Let’s get out of here,” I whisper, and relief flashes in his eyes.
“You’re serious?”
“Yeah,” I breathe, and he chuckles under his breath. “As much fun as I’m having, I’m tired of wearing heels.”
He shakes his head, chuckling in disbelief.
“What?”
He steps back, taking my hand. “Nothing.”
If you had told me four months ago that I’d be walking down the halls of the Oak Ridge Lodge, hand in hand with none other than Levi Cross, I would have laughed in your face.
Now, when I try to pull away, he tightens his hold, shooting me a look.
“Someone might see.”
He cocks a brow at me. “So?”
His hair is mussed from my fingers, and I’m sure my lipstick is all over my face. We may as well have a neon sign over our heads that reads, ‘ We’re leaving early to go have sex’, but I don’t care.
Not when he looks at me like I’m the only girl that’s ever walked the planet.
“You don’t care?”
His hand grips my waist, and he pulls me into his front, his lips at my ear.
“Are you implying that you’re embarrassed to be seen with me?”
I pull back, shoving at his chest, fighting back a smile.
“I have to use the restroom,” I say quietly.
He leans in and places a soft kiss on my forehead before stepping back and finally releasing me.
“I’ll go tell Christian we’re leaving.”
I nod, and I can’t fight the stupid grin on my face when he pulls away, walking backwards down the hall.
I feel like we’re two teenagers in love for the first time. Like I’m made of air.
I practically skip into the bathroom and quickly clean myself up in the nearest stall. I’m standing at the counter, reapplying my makeup when the scuff of heavy boots sounds at the door.
“You can’t be in here,” I smirk, but when I turn to lock eyes with the man at the door, it’s not Levi like I’d thought.
“What are you doing here, Alex? If Levi sees you in here, he’s going to kick your ass.”
“We need to talk.”
“About? You pretty much said everything you wanted to say. You know? When you called me a whore.”
He shakes his head and sighs.
“I was just trying to tell you the truth. Cross isn’t who you think he is, Ava.”
A laugh bubbles up my chest even as apprehension sets in. “Apparently, neither were you.”
“He’s dangerous.”
“Yeah, to you .” I glance towards the door. “He’s going to come looking for me.”
“I just need a moment. If you don’t want to speak to me ever again after this, then fine, I’ll leave you alone, but I can’t just walk away without telling you the truth.”
My pulse is racing, and my throat feels like there’s a golf ball lodged behind my tonsils.
Of course, Levi is dangerous. It’s part of what drew me to him in the first place. But he’d never be dangerous towards me. Never . . .
“Fine, but make it quick.” I’m not kidding when I say that if Levi catches him cornering me in the women’s restroom, he’ll rip him limb from limb.
“I didn’t want to have to be the one to tell you this, but I care about you, Ava, and I’m not about to sit back and watch you get hurt.”
“What are you talking about, Alex?” I snap. I’ve had about enough of his cryptic nonsense.
He lets out a deep breath, scrubbing a hand through his hair, and looks anywhere in the room but at me.
That’s . . . never a good sign.
“Cross is using you to get closer to the Burelli’s.”
I freeze, my entire body rigid like I just fell through the ice in a lake.
I can’t do anything but stare at him blankly. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
“He’s being paid, Ava,” he interrupts impatiently. “He’s been playing into your feelings because Cross knows you’re his only shot at getting his miserable job back. Making you think he wants you is the best way to do that.”
My eyes sting when I shake my head and back away.
“No. You don’t know Levi,” I whisper. “He wouldn’t do that.”
Boring.
Prudish.
Whore.
Alex takes a step forward.
“Do you know Cross?”
No. It can’t be true.
I refuse to believe the same man who made me soup and held me while I cried when my grandmother died and panicked when I disappeared is only entertaining me because he’s using me.
But all the signs are there . . . the little voice in the back of my head whispers.