15. Katy
15
Katy
S o much of me wants to be mad at Viktor, but I now realize he wasn’t being an ass telling me we needed to leave. He was trying to keep my past out of the situation in front of my friends. I respect him for that. He didn’t have to. I’ve given him nothing but grief all day, and he still tried to be a good person, which only makes me feel more like shit.
“We aren’t being followed or anything, are we?” I can’t help but feel nervous. The last time I heard from Shane, I shot him.
Pulling my knees into my chest, I wrap my arms around my legs and try to become as small as possible in the passenger’s seat.
“Calm down, sweetheart. The only one following us is Dempsey.” Tucker rubs my arm as I stare out the side view mirror. I’ve been watching my car follow us. I know it’s him, and although I’m still mad at Viktor right now, I wish he was in the truck with us so I would know for sure he’s safe.
“Is he back? Is this starting over?”
There was something in the look on his face when he just glanced at me. Shane did stop, didn’t he? No one has said anything to me about him other than he hadn’t been found after our incident in the rain. The police called all of the local hospitals and gave them a description of Shane. I didn’t know where I had shot him, only that I had, so they didn’t have that information to help if he showed up.
I speak in barely a whisper because I don’t want to believe that it’s true. “Did it never stop?”
Tucker’s knuckles turn white on the steering wheel, and he sucks in a ragged breath.
“No, sweetheart, it never stopped. We still occasionally get photos. We’ve intercepted a few packages before you’ve seen them as well. All presents for Owen. That’s why Dempsey hasn’t been relieved of his duties. Shane hasn’t stopped being a threat.”
I puff a big breath of air from my lungs and curl myself tighter, staring at my car. I thought this was over, but if I were Shane, I’d probably just be more pissed.
“Why tonight?”
“He told Dempsey to get the asshole off of you because he didn’t want more competition.”
“Tucker, I’m so sorry I acted like a brat. You came from work, didn’t you? That’s how you got to us so quickly. He called you because I was being a spoiled brat and didn’t want to listen to him because I’m holding a grudge like a toddler. I should have known something was wrong, but I thought he was just jealous that I was talking to another guy. I know I was jealous when Sara pulled him away—” Holy word vomit. Appalled, I bury my head into my knees. I didn’t mean to confess any of that. Least of all to Tucker. “Please ignore those last few sentences.”
“Too late, Katy. I heard it all. And I know more than that.”
I groan into my knees. Of course he does. He’s the all-knowing Tucker.
“Go ahead. Say whatever you want to say.” I wait and wait. And just when I’m ready to burst with anticipation, he speaks.
“It’s not my place.”
What?
“Um. Okay. What does that even mean, ‘it’s not your place?’”
“Katy, you’re a grown woman. He’s a grown man. I can’t tell you what you can and can’t do together. I can tell you that if he hurts you,”—he turns and his eyes roam my pill bug state—“any more than whatever is going on right now, he’ll have hell to pay. If you want to talk, I’m always here with a nonjudgmental ear.”
Wow. The person I was the most worried about finding out seems to already know and isn’t giving me the third degree.
“Thank you.” I don’t know how else to respond.
To say this day has been a rollercoaster would be an understatement. I woke up pissed, had a great conversation with Lincoln, pedicures and Pina Coladas with Axel, and then had a fun night out with friends. Now, I just want to curl up in bed and sleep, but I’m so wired with adrenaline that I have no idea how I’ll manage.
“Are you still okay keeping Owen for the night? I’ll feel safer knowing he’s surrounded by all of you.”
“Of course. He’s always welcome. You can stay too if you’d like. I want you to feel safe. With or without Dempsey.”
“No, I’ll be okay. I’ll come over a little after seven when my alarm goes off. I have work tomorrow, or rather today since it’s already tomorrow.” The clock on the dashboard glows a green 12:37.
As we pull into the driveway and park, Viktor parks next to us. I reach for the handle, and Tucker puts a hand on my arm.
“Wait. Let Dempsey sweep the house just in case.”
I slump back in my seat, feeling defeated and anxious. What if Shane is in there? We already know he has a gun. I can’t watch Viktor get hurt again. My anxiety rises as the front door opens, and he disappears inside. This is torture. The seconds pass by, feeling like minutes, as I see him sweep across the house by the lights turning on and off in each room.
“It’s okay, sweetheart.” Tucker holds down my shaking leg. I hadn’t realized my nerves were showing an outward appearance.
“I know, but why isn’t he out yet? There haven’t been any lights turned on in a while.” In reality, the clock only now says 12:41. Four minutes isn’t really that long, but it feels like forever. I just want him to give us the sign that it’s clear to come inside.
Where is he?
Finally, the front porch light comes on, and Viktor stands under the glow, his blonde hair shining, making him look almost ethereal. He nods and gives us a thumbs-up.
“I’ll walk you in.”
“I’m good. I just want to get inside and go to bed. It’s been a long day.”
“Alright. Let any of us know if you need anything. I love you, sweetheart.”
“Love you, too, Tuck. G’night.” Tucker leans over and kisses my forehead. I open the truck door, still apprehensive of my surroundings, and power walk to my front door. Viktor holds it open with his arm, and I duck under him to swiftly get inside.
I stop midway to my bedroom and listen to the door lock click and the beeping as Viktor turns on the alarm. When the robotic female says, “Armed,” I exhale a breath that leaves me boneless. All the adrenaline seeps out with the confirmation that I’m safely inside my house.
My back is still turned to Viktor, but I feel him approach. I don’t have the energy in me to fight or argue, or even talk about anything right now. My body is a live wire of stress and nerves.
“Pepper?” Viktor’s voice is low and gravelly. He knows I need to be handled with kid gloves right now. But maybe I don’t.
I look out the back window, knowing I’ll see nothing because it’s dark. It’s nighttime. It’s my time.
Spinning around, I grab Viktor’s hand and pull him behind me. He follows without hesitation into my bedroom.
“Lay down on your back.” He looks at me, confused. “Actually, take off your shoes and shirt and lay on the bed on your back.
“I—”
I turn and look him directly in his eyes. In this moment, our height difference doesn’t matter. He sees my determination. “Viking, do as you’re told.”
He mutters “fuck” as he toes off his shoes and removes his shirt. Once he’s done, he lies on the bed and waits.
“Move closer to the headboard.” He shifts his body higher and stares at the ceiling. I untie the neck of my shirt and remove it but leave my lacy blue bra on. Next goes my shoes, pants, and matching blue panties. I know how much he loves my breasts, but this isn’t about him; it’s about me, and he doesn’t get rewarded for his bad behavior.
I crawl onto the bed, and Viktor’s head turns to watch me. His pupils are blown with lust, and when he tries to speak, I cover his mouth with my hand.
“Don’t talk, just listen and nod yes or no. Do you understand?” He nods under my hand. “Good boy.” I pat his cheek, and he leans into my hand, sighing.
I kneel up next to his head, and his eyes widen.
“I’m stressed. About last night, about tonight, about you . Since you’re a big reason for that stress, you’re going to help me relieve some of it. I’m going to sit on your face, and you’ll make me come so I can get a good night’s sleep. Do you remember our safeword?” He slowly nods. “Say it.” He hesitates. I lean closer to his ear and whisper, “You have my permission to speak.”
With a shuddering breath, he says, “bunny.”
“Such a good boy. Since you’re behaving so well, as long as you can concentrate on what your tongue is doing, I’ll allow your hands to do what they need to for you to get some relief as well. But , my breasts are off limits, as you can tell by my bra still being on. Do you understand?”
I swear I hear the man whimper before he nods.
“Do you need to use your safeword right now?”
His head shakes vigorously, and I smile. Mounting his head, I think of all the smutty scenes I’ve read in my romance books. I have no idea what I’m doing, but I know an orgasm will make me feel better, and if I act confident in what I’m doing, I’ll be confident. Fake it till you make it, right?
I lift my knee, chanting to myself not to kick him in the head. Viktor grabs my legs to help guide me into position. I want to yell at him to keep his hands to himself, but I also appreciate the assistance.
I grab the headboard, the reason I told him to lay closer to it and wait for the first feel of his tongue. It doesn’t come. I feel him putting pressure on my legs, and I look down at him.
“Lower.”
I should chastise him for speaking out of turn, but I don’t understand what he wants me to do.
“What?”
“I need you lower, Pepper. If you’re going to sit on my face, I need you to sit, not hover.”
I thought I was sitting. I don’t want to smother the man, which is also a common thought for the heroins in my books.
Be confident, Katy.
Viktor’s hands shift to my inner thighs, and he pulls them apart, lowering my core closer to his face.
“You smell like fucking Eden.”
“You aren’t supposed to be talking.”
“Then put your pussy in my mouth and fill it up so I can’t.”
Fuck his breathing. I let myself fully down over his face. He knows the safeword and can physically remove me if he needs to.
My move seems to please him because he hums into me, and I almost jolt away. If it wasn’t for his grip around my thighs, I might have.
Viktor’s tongue comes out, and the pressure of gravity makes it feel like he’s everywhere. His tongue licks, and his lips suck. I’m mad at him, and so fucking turned on that all the lines in my head are blurring. The emotions mix, all being wrapped together by pleasure.
The warmth of his mouth lowers, and he spears his tongue inside me. I gasp at the invasion. Viktor’s hands move, and there’s suddenly pressure on my clit. I’m overwhelmed by his tongue and his finger touching me at the same time.
I’m pulled out of my pleasure bubble when I hear Viktor’s zipper lower. I told him he could do what he needed to relieve himself, and it seems like he’s listening. Except his hand comes back to my thigh.
Why is he touching only me and not himself?
The question drifts off as my pleasure heightens. Folding one arm over the headboard, I rest my forehead on my hand. Viktor’s hair is too tempting not to touch, and I reach down, pulling out his hair tie.
I can’t see much of him as he’s fully committed to being buried beneath me, but I run my fingers through his loose strands, pulling at the roots. The guttural moan that the pulling produces vibrates my entire core and forces a groan out of me.
My orgasm is rapidly growing, and I’m warring with myself. I want it so bad but I also want it to last longer. Fuck. I don’t know what I want more of, but it seems my body is making the decision for me. My toes tingle as the warmth pools low in my belly. My hand tightens further in his hair, and my hips grind across his face. Viktor’s beard rubs along my inner thighs, and the scratchiness only heightens the build-up.
“Fuck, Viking. Fuck, I’m gonna—Oh god.” The wave of euphoria crashes through me. I’m practically humping his face, but I can’t stop myself. It feels too fucking good. My moans borderline screams, and I’m happy we’re alone in the house, and nothing can stop this moment from playing out completely. Viktor moans loudly beneath me, and it sounds like he’s enjoying himself as much as I am.
Viktor is relentless, drawing out my orgasm with his tongue as long as he can, and only stops when I make him.
“Enough. I can’t take anymore. Stop, please.” The words come out between pants and gasps. There’s barely any air in my lungs, and I remember he probably hasn’t had a full breath in a long while. I push myself back to slide down his chest when he stops me.
“I’m a mess.”
His face glistens with my come, but I don’t understand why that would stop me sitting lower on his stomach. He shakes his head at my inspection of his face. “Not up here.”
Not up here? Oh .
I peer over my shoulder and find come all over Viktor’s stomach and chest. I guess his moaning wasn’t just from my pleasure but also his.
“Let me get something to clean you up.”
He opens his mouth to speak but thinks twice about it; his silvery-blue eyes holding mine.
“You have permission to speak freely.”
“Thank you, Pepper. I’ll just go take a shower in the guest bath and go to bed. I know you’re tired.”
Is he dismissing me? Is he dismissing himself? Is he playing our little game better than me? I still have no idea what I’m doing and what happens after . I carefully hike my leg over his midsection and sit next to him.
“If that’s what you’d prefer, you’re free to leave.”
There’s long moments of silence and staring. I don’t want him to leave. I’m still upset and confused about last night. I want him to ask to stay, but even if he did, I’d have to tell him no.
He seems to come to the same conclusion as I do and nods before carefully shifting off the bed. Viktor picks his shirt up off the floor and wipes his stomach and chest clean. Stepping up to me, he pauses before kissing the top of my head and whispering, “Goodnight.”
I got what I wanted, and at the moment, it felt so right and so fucking good, but now I feel empty and like I used him. I know if he felt that way, he still wouldn’t have stopped me.
Did he do that against his will?
All the stress he just relieved has been replaced with new stress and anxiety.