22. Katy
22
Katy
I could be a teacher. It’s all I’ve been thinking about since my conversation a few days ago with Viktor. There would be a lot to juggle with Owen, but it’s a real possibility.
As exciting as my mind has been with my future education, right now I have a stubborn little boy who insists he wants to use the big boy potty. He’s been following Viktor into the bathroom and trying. Viktor has been an absolute saint about it and encouraging him. I’d be lying if I didn’t admit to myself how absolutely fucking sexy it makes him as a man to see the way he treats Owen.
“Mama. Pidey-man.”
“You want Spiderman undies?” Owen points to a package of underwear that catches his attention amongst the huge wall of options. I thought we might as well give this potty training thing a try if he’s going to be so interested. Why fight it if I can save money and not have to buy diapers anymore?
“Vik. Pidey-man, too.”
I bite my lips to contain my smile. The mental image of Viktor in a pair of Spiderman briefs is just too funny.
“Sorry, little man. Spiderman is just for big boys like you.” Viktor takes a pack off the rack and hands them to Owen. “Is that even the right size?”
“Not for you.” The laugh I was holding bursts out. Viktor groans at me as Owen giggles at the package in his hands.
“Don’t be a brat, Pepper,” he whispers in my ear. A shiver runs up my spine and I need to decide what role I want to play right now. It’s technically daytime, but he melts so easily when I take control.
“Then you better be a good boy, Viking.”
That’s all it takes. His pupils dilate, and I hear the low rumble in his chest.
“What else do we need for potty training?”
I’m once again holding in a laugh as he speaks through gritted teeth. I love when I say or do something that tests his control.
“We need another stool, something for a rewards chart, and probably several more packs of these.” I reach over and grab a few different character undies for Owen.
“Vik, potty?” Owen holds up his pack of undies to Viktor.
“Do you need to go potty now?” Viktor scoops Owen up into his arms as Owen hugs the package close to his chest.
“Pidey-man!”
“We’ll be right back. Don’t take your eyes off her.” Patrick grunts per usual, and Viktor smiles at me before disappearing down an aisle to take Owen to the bathroom.
I forgot Patrick was with us. He does an excellent job at being inconspicuous. I sometimes wish he was friendlier, but then outings like this wouldn’t be as fun. Viktor doesn’t feel like a babysitter or a bodyguard, though I know he’s always on alert when we’re out. He’s phenomenal at his job.
I wander the arts and crafts aisle, looking for something to use for a reward chart. I already picked up a poster board and markers, but I want something fun. I come across the star stickers and instantly have fond memories of school and receiving a sticker on my assignments from my teachers. I reach for the gold ones but veer left to a packet of holographic rainbow ones right next to them.
“Perfect.” I’ll make a chart and reward him with these colorful stars. He’ll love it.
“Mama? Where Mama?” I hear Owen’s sweet voice calling for me, and I roll my cart to the end of the aisle to see Viktor holding Owen’s hand. They both smile when they see me, and my heart warms. Viktor releases Owen’s hand when he tugs, and a few seconds later, a little body crashes into my leg.
“I pee pee potty, Mama!”
“You did? What a big boy. Look what I found.” Owen’s eyes light up when he sees the stickers in my hand. I open the package and put one on his shirt. He tugs it off his body so he can peer at it in awe.
“Did he actually pee?” I ask Viktor in a hushed tone. He shrugs.
“He dribbled a little. But he refused to put a diaper on, so he’s wearing a new pair of underwear.”
“Oh. I guess we better hurry along this little shopping trip before it turns into a disaster.” We are in no way ready for diaperless outings yet, but I also don’t want to discourage Owen.
Four accidents. We went through an entire pack of new undies before Owen finally went to bed—with a diaper on. I’m exhausted but also excited for him because he successfully used the bathroom twice. He loved the stickers even more when he got to put them on the chart I created for him. It feels like progress, and I’ll take it.
“Movie? What do you have there?”
I glance up from my seat on the couch at Viktor, who’s holding a remote in his hand.
I finally opened the gift bag from my mother, and to my shock, inside was an identical bunny to the one that Owen loves. It’s a popular stuffed animal at any baby store, which is why Nicole chose it for him. She knows the plight of a lost lovie.
“The present from Babs. Funny huh?” I lift the toy, and he takes it, looking it over before tossing it on the coffee table.
“So, movie?”
“Are we talking about an actual movie or a Netflix and chill kind of movie?”
His smile could melt ice cream in the middle of winter.
“I guess that would depend on you since the sun just went down.”
The combination of being simultaneously turned on and exhausted seems like the soundtrack for motherhood.
“Honestly, I think I’d like to shower above anything else. I can still smell pee despite washing my hands more times than I can count. I think the smell is stuck in my nose hairs.”
Viktor chuckles, and I can’t blame him. I’ve already showered once today after Owen peed on my leg while I read him a book.
I still praised him for letting me know he had to pee…after we were both wet. But I know just feeling the sensation is progress. Baby steps.
“I understand that. Do you want to watch a movie after, or I can make you some tea for bed?”
It’s nighttime. It’s my time.
“Would you like to join me?”
Viktor looks at me with a shocked expression. We haven’t done anything like this, openly naked in front of each other for a purpose other than sexual gratification.
“In the shower?”
Why does he look so surprised? It’s just a shower. Although I know us, and it will most likely lead to something .
“Yes, Viking. In the shower. I’m not the only one who had to deal with pee today.” He cleaned up Owen while I showered earlier, and I was grateful for the help. I’m always grateful.
It’s always fun watching this big man look nervous because of me. His exterior is tough and intimidating. I remember the first few weeks when Justin hired him, and he was just like Patrick, quiet and all work. Our relationship has come so far.
“Who’s asking? Katy or Pepper?”
“Both.” He likes my answer based on his smile and the hand he offers to help me stand.
As we walk into my bathroom, we stand and stare at each other, unmoving. There’s sexual tension between us always, but something about this doesn’t feel sexual.
I take the hem of his shirt, and he bends so I can lift it over his head. I roam my finger over the dips of his chest. He’s so pretty.
“You’re beautiful.” The corner of his lip tugs at my compliment, and he sighs a contented sound. I trace the scar on his abdomen—the entrance wound to the bullet that almost took him from me. A wave of guilt floods me as it always does when I see it. He must sense the change in my mood and interrupts my thought process.
“Your turn.” Viktor removes my shirt and unclips my bra. He mimics my actions, and fingers roam my body, avoiding where he knows I want him to touch me the most. This isn’t meant to be a sexual experience, but my body still yearns for his touch.
He pulls back his hands to undo his belt and jeans, and I do the same. We silently watch each other as we strip, eyes roaming over every piece of exposed skin.
Viktor turns the shower on, but neither of us is in a rush to get in. Even when the mirror fogs and the air in the room thickens with humidity, we stay lost in each other’s eyes, hands caressing our now slick skin.
“I don’t deserve you, Katy.”
How could he think that? I’m the one undeserving of him. He laid his life on the line for a stupid teenager. He’s been by my side every step of the way through the last few years of my life. I’d be lost without him.
“I’ve never heard words so far from the truth. You deserve so much more than I have to offer, Viktor.”
His head slowly shakes, disagreeing with me, but he doesn’t vocalize his protest. Instead, his fingers caress down my arm until he reaches my hand and laces his fingers with mine. He steps into the shower and pulls me in with him.
Viktor angles me under the spray and gently tips my head back to get my hair wet. His actions are wordless as he guides my body to do what he wants. Without asking, he takes my shampoo and lathers his hands. Weaving his fingers through my hair, he massages my scalp, and the feeling is heavenly. His large hands are so graceful and tender. He washes his hair after he rinses mine and then conditions it.
When he reaches for the body wash and loofah, I stop him.
“Let me.” He nods, and I pour the rain-scented soap onto the sponge. I wash Viktor from head to toe. I never knew lathering someone’s body could be so sensual. I drop the sponge to the floor and use my hands to wash away the suds. The tension between us feels like it’s moments away from snapping, but I don’t want it to. We’re in a haven of adoration and comfort, and it feels more monumental than anything we’ve done up until this point.
Viktor bends, picking up the loofah, and it’s his turn to wash me. Once the cleaning part of showering is done, he pulls me into his chest and kisses the top of my head. Pure joy and contentment are my only thoughts as we embrace each other under the stream of warm water. I feel like I’m meant to be here. He’s meant to be here, with me.
The sound of glass breaking and the high-pitched squeal of the alarm jolts us from our bubble.
“What the fuck.” Viktor is out of the shower and throwing on pants before I can register what’s going on.
“Katy, don’t move.”
“Owen.” I’m trying to pull on my robe as Viktor grabs a gun from the nightstand.
“I’ve got him. Stay here.”