Chapter 11
Stepping back upto the window, I watched as Jasper’s fingers shifted to claws, and he started cutting the bands holding everything on the first pallet together. When all the boxes were open and accessible, he moved to the next.
And the next.
And the next.
I didn’t bother going out to offer my help. He would only refuse if I did.
When Jasper had single-handedly moved every piece of furniture and every decoration out to the balcony earlier, he’d made it very clear that he didn’t want me taking any part in it. It frustrated me that he saw me as so weak and useless, but arguing in my defense hadn’t seemed to change the way he saw me.
So, I stopped trying.
Instead, I pulled up the digitalized photos Brynn had sent me earlier, to show where everything was supposed to go.
When Jasper carried the first mattress in, I pointed him to the right bedroom. Thanks to his size and strength, he didn’t struggle with any of the furniture, at least.
He moved quickly as we worked through everything on the balcony, and didn’t complain once when I had him reposition something. He actually started looking to me with every new piece of furniture he brought in, which made me feel good.
I didn’t follow Brynn’s pictures exactly. As we put things in, I asked Jasper to move other things around, making them flow better.
His lack of frustration or complaints made me feel like he was silently pissed at me, so my cheeks warmed as we continued. I was sweaty enough from heat that I didn’t think Jasper would realize what exactly I was feeling, thankfully.
A few hours later,everything was in its place.
Or at least its temporary place. I’d probably move some of it around again.
Possibly all of it.
But I liked it for the moment.
Hell, I loved it for the moment.
It was cozy and comfortable, with light colors, fun colors, and some darks thrown in there too for good measure. The place looked like a dream. Some of the pictures were in the wrong positions, because we’d used the hooks and nails already in the walls, but I didn’t care. That would make me feel less guilty when it came time to move everything around again.
When we were done, Jasper went outside to pile up the boxes and packing material, and I made my way to the new couch.
It was a gorgeous, gigantic sectional that fit the wide, open space perfectly. The fabric was soft, and the deep blue color stood out just enough without looking odd.
I wanted to video call Elodie or Viola, to show them how gorgeous it looked, but it was the middle of the night. Vi wouldn’t want to hear my excitement about Jasper’s home, either. And Elodie would overthink what it meant.
A text came through almost as soon as I took a seat. The cushions were a little more firm than I wanted, but I was pretty sure that always happened with new furniture. It would probably loosen up.
Brynn
Well are you done yet?
How did it turn out?
I need pictures! Videos! Something!
I’m dying over here, and my mate keeps trying to drag my excited ass to bed!
Not in a sexy way…
Maybe
Okay, fine, the sexiness already happened
I should’ve stopped a while ago, sorry, TMI
I couldn’t hold back my snort as the barrage of messages came through.
Me
Are you dressed enough for a video call?
Brynn
I CAN BE
ONE SEC
A minute later, she called me.
Her blue eyes were bright and her blonde hair was a mess when I answered, but she was in fact clothed. Or at least wearing a t-shirt. Her mate wasn’t in the video, and I wasn’t going to ask if he was dressed.
“Hey!” Her grin was so huge, I couldn’t help but grin back. “You totally made my day. Right, Bash?”
“Mmhm.” A tired male voice rumbled.
“Who are you talking to?” Jasper’s growl rolled through the room a heartbeat later, and goosebumps broke out on my skin.
“Brynn.” I held the phone up, tilting it toward the doorway, where I knew he was walking toward me.
“That was Bash’s voice, Jas. She doesn’t have a secret lover.” There was a pause. “Do you?”
Jasper snarled.
I rolled my eyes, pulling the camera back to myself. “No, there’s no secret lover. Like I already told him, I wouldn’t have gone to that wedding alone if I was with someone.”
“Sweet. Okay, show me the goods,” Brynn demanded.
I laughed, but flipped the camera around and made my way off the couch.
She oohed and ahhed as I walked through the living space, showing her everything. My smile grew, and my enthusiasm did too as she gushed over how gorgeous it was alongside me.
By the time we hung up, my mood had lifted completely, and I was feeling… excited, honestly.
Not about the mate thing.
But the house? It wasn’t really a house, per say, but I’d go with that anyway.
And the house was beautiful.
The room we’d turned into my library-slash-workspace had giant windows that looked out over the mountains, making it feel like I was outside.
I would be able to focus and feel inspiration in my own home, without having to leave. That alone would be a huge change for the better.
“Your sister is awesome,” I told Jasper, when I finally turned the phone off. He was making more pancakes—and I was looking forward to them, despite the repeated meal.
He made a noise of agreement.
My excitement faded slightly as I padded to the new kitchen table. It was stunning, and I dragged my fingers slowly over the ashy brown wood as I took a seat.
After a few minutes of slightly awkward silence, I spoke again. “I’m sorry I made you move so many things. I know it was probably frustrating, and I appreciate that you didn’t lose your temper. I like to move my furniture around a few times a year to make everything feel fresh and new, so I’d like to say I won’t ask you to move anything again, but I probably will.”
“It wasn’t frustrating. Moving things around isn’t a big deal. It certainly isn’t something I’d ever lose my temper over.”
“I don’t know, you seem to get angry fairly easily…” I regretted the words as soon as they were out, and bit my lip. Hard.
“That’s heat’s doing. And the anger originates from the possibility of losing you; it’s never been directed at you.”
Was that true?
I tried to think back to the times he’d been angry…
Maybe they all had been when another guy or scent was added to the mix. He really hadn’t gotten mad at me before.
“So your personality will change after the bond is sealed?”
“When I’m no longer driven by my instincts, yes, I’ll be myself again.”
That was bizarre to think about.
He was so controlled by his dragon side that he didn’t even feel like himself.
It sounded shitty.
He asked me something, but I was so lost in my thoughts, I barely heard the question.
“Miranda?” he repeated.
“Hmm?”
“Are you in pain?”
My body ached badly, and I was basically a pool of sweat. “Not really.”
It was a lie.
I wasn’t going to tell him I was hurting; he’d freak out.
Jasper growled. “I can smell your dishonesty.”
Crap.
“My life’s going to get harder the more you get to know my scent, isn’t it?”
He made a noise of frustration, but didn’t disagree.
When he flipped the pancakes onto a plate, he did so more roughly than usual.
“I think I want the bedroom across from my library, after we seal the bond. Assuming you still want to do that.”
His shoulders tensed, but he jerked his head in something that almost resembled a nod.
“Now who’s being dishonest?”
He raked a hand through his hair, still looking away from me. “It’s not dishonest. Sealing the bond still seems inevitable, so doing it now will simplify things.”
“Just tell me the truth—you don’t want the bond,” I said.
“It’s more complicated than that.”
“I don’t think it is. I heard your friend offer you his condolences on the balcony.”
“He shouldn’t have said that.”
“Why not? What’s the point in dancing around the truth?”
“Being considerate isn’t dancing around the truth. He should have considered your feelings.” Jasper’s voice was lowering and getting more gravelly as the conversation went on.
“He didn’t know I was listening.”
“He should’ve considered my feelings, then. I don’t need his condolences.”
“Why not?”
“Because I don’t want a mate bond, but I do want you. The thought of watching you walk away from me, or into another man’s arms, makes me lose control.”
“That’s because of the bond.”
“It’s because you’re mine. And you were mine before heat ever started.”
He’d brought it up again.
The thing about watching me during the wedding.
Though part of me wanted to shut up and let it go, I was too frustrated by the knowledge that he was probably lying to me about it. I wasn’t one for starting fights, but I could stand up for myself when there was no other option. Growing up with a twin sister as strong-willed as Vi had forced me to learn that.
“I never caught you staring at me, and I looked at you pretty frequently. If you were really attracted to me before heat started, I would’ve noticed.”
He finally turned toward me, abandoning his pancakes though his spatula was still in his hand. “You don’t believe me?”
“Not really.”
“I don’t lie, Miranda.”
I didn’t know him well enough to believe that.
He must’ve seen it in his expression, because his jaw clenched. He worked it back and forth before he finally turned his back to me.
A moment of silence passed before he said, “You tripped when you stepped up beside Vi during the ceremony. She caught you, and you laughed quietly together. Everyone else was staring at Elodie; I was watching you.”
I swallowed roughly.
He and his brothers had been standing across from us, seeing as they were the groomsmen. He could’ve noticed that from the corner of his eye.
“You had four glasses of wine. Made five trips to the food table. Liked the vanilla macarons more than any other flavors. I tried them, by the way, and wasn’t impressed.”
“They were amazing,” I protested weakly.
I’d eaten at least a dozen of them. Eating had kept me from having to participate in Vi and Eli’s disagreements.
“You ate twenty-three of them. I saw nearly every bite.”
Shit.
“You danced twice. Talked with Elodie’s family for a few minutes. Hugged her parents. It took a lot of effort to stay in my seat when her dad’s arms were around you, though it only lasted a few seconds.”
My face flushed.
Maybe I believed him.
“You left your bag with Eli both times you went to the bathroom. There were a few drops of water on the abdomen of your dress when you came back the second time. I assumed the sink splashed you.”
Holy hell.
“Alright, you win. You watched me.”
“I wanted you. Still do. Always will.”
“We haven’t even had sex yet. How can you possibly know that?”
“I’m a dragon, Miranda. You’ve heard the legends about us. Our mates are the treasure we hoard. When a dragon chooses a female, he doesn’t let go. Period.”
Well, that was intense.
I bit my lip, not sure what to say.
“We avoid bonds because of what they cost us, but when we have them, they become the center of our existence. There is no turning back for me now. I belong to you. I don’t want you across from your library—I want you in my bed, in our bed, where you belong.”
Hot damn.
I stared at his back while he plated the pancakes. They smelled a little burnt, but I barely noticed.
“Has anyone ever told you you’re unfairly attractive?” I finally asked.
“The way you stared at me during the wedding did that plenty.” He handed me a fork, and the nearly-empty bottle of syrup we’d basically pounded since we got to Mate Mountain. “You’re going to hate pancakes by the time heat’s over.”
I couldn’t help but crack a smile. “Not possible.”
“We’ll see.” His bare foot found mine beneath the table, and my body relaxed in response to his touch.
He felt too good.
And maybe I was starting to hope he always would.
The tensionbetween us relaxed slightly as we ate. He’d made it clear what he wanted and where he stood.
I hadn’t, though.
And honestly?
I didn’t know either of those things.
I didn’t want a mate bond, but I kind of wanted him.
I didn’t want to stay in Mate Mountain, but I did like the way our living space looked.
So where did that leave me? What did I want to happen?
I didn’t know.
And without knowing that, it was pretty much impossible to say where I stood.
“What do you do for fun?” Jasper asked me, as we finished up with our food.
“Draw.” I shrugged. “Read. Eat whatever Vi cooks. Listen to her rant about her coworkers. She’s the head chef at a restaurant in Scale Ridge, and she hates it.”
He lifted an eyebrow. “Why does she hate it?”
“A bunch of reasons. Mainly, she’s always felt about cooking the way I feel about art—that she should be able to do whatever she wants with it. The need for money forced us both into careers that are as closely related to what we love as possible. But while I mostly enjoy my job, she hates hers. Restaurants don’t exactly let their chefs take liberties with their recipes.”
“Hmm.”
“Yeah. I hope she’ll eventually quit and find a job that gives her more freedom. She wouldn’t let our parents pay for her school, so she’ll probably stay at the restaurant until her loans are paid off, though.”
“What about you?”
“What about me?”
“Do you have student loans?”
A money chat.
Lovely.
I supposed that was unavoidable, given we were being forced to enter a serious relationship.
“I did at first. My parents didn’t like that I was majoring in art. They eventually came around to it, and offered to pay the loans off. They’ve got a shitload of money, so I agreed.”
“What’s your plan as far as your work, then?”
I shrugged. “Keep this job as long as possible. The pay isn’t fantastic, but I love it too much to leave. When it’s over, I’ll probably be screwed and have to start a business from scratch somehow. I do have fairly large followings on social media, thanks to the publicity from my job, but I’m not sure whether or not it will translate into work when everything is said and done. Fingers crossed.”
I lifted them, and his lips curved upward slightly. “We’ll merge our accounts as soon as we’re through with heat.”
My forehead creased. “I don’t remember having that conversation.”
His face reddened, just slightly.
I couldn’t help the amusement that welled within me.
He was embarrassed about bringing it up without a conversation.
“I have money,” he said. “Plenty. The governments pay us to run the prison, and always have. When we’re mated, everything that’s mine is yours.”
“I don’t need your money, Jas.”
“Mates are partners in everything. It has nothing to do with need, and everything to do with equality.”
Huh.
I supposed I could see his point. My parents had always shared money, and while that didn’t work for some couples, I’d expected to do the same if I ever found a partner.
I’d just never expected to find a partner.
But that reminded me…
“You’re going to have to meet my parents,” I warned.
“I’ll survive.”
“They’re not the kind of people who love everyone they meet,” I added.
“They don’t have to love me, they just have to accept that you’re mine.”
I bit my lip.
I’d always imagined that if I did bring someone home, it would be someone who fit well in my family. Someone determined to make a place for themselves.
Jasper not caring about that was going to be a problem at some point.
But, like most of the others, it was tomorrow’s problem.
Or next month’s problem.
For the moment, there was something bigger to deal with.
Heat.