Chapter 13 #3
“As friends. I can build you a cool pillow fort between us so your hands aren’t tempted to go roaming in the middle of the night.
I mean, I know I’m hard to resist, but if that’s what you need to feel safe enough to sleep, I’ll make it happen.
” I can feel my cock starting to react to the thought of her here, with me, in my bed.
Which shocks me a little, considering the night I’ve had mentally.
I need to steer us back to neutral ground.
“You have to tell your mom, though. I’m not getting yelled at again.
Especially not for kidnapping her daughter from her own home. ”
Poppy groans through the phone.
“I’d better hang up. I can do this, I’ll be okay.” The words are more to convince herself, not me.
“I know you can, but… if you can’t, call me back.
Even if we don’t talk and you just need to hear me breathing while I sleep, and I’ll hear you if you call out in your sleep, then that’s okay too.
” It’s the best I can offer tonight, but as hard as it would be, if these nightmares and sleepless nights persist for Poppy, I’m bringing her to my bed. I’ll sleep on the floor if needed.
“Why are you doing this, Landon?” she asks.
“You know the answer to that, Poppy, but that’s a conversation for another day. Now go to sleep.” Because she’s not the only one who’s not in the right head space for that talk tonight.
“Okay,” is all she says.
“Okay,” I repeat.
“Good night, Landon,” she says, with so many unspoken words hanging between us.
“Good night, Poppy.” I want to say more, but thankfully she hangs up the call, and I drop my phone onto the pillow beside me.
I stare up at the ceiling, but my mind is so tired, it’s now gone blank. I’m past the ability to think clearly.
The last thing I remember is closing my eyes and starting to take a deep breath.
POPPY
“I can’t believe it’s been a week since you’ve been back in Boston and you haven’t hooked up with Landon yet,” Autumn says loudly to me as I negotiate sliding into the booth at the back of the Strong and Brewdy coffee shop.
I love how private these booths are. It’s Autumn’s favorite place to get brunch—well, other than my mother’s kitchen where she devours the cinnamon buns.
It’s in the city, not far from Lucinda’s.
“Seriously, do you want to announce that to the world? Keep your voice down.” My breathing is still a little labored when I exert myself. And getting from the car, along the street, and through the packed coffee shop this morning has been a marathon event.
“Oh, shush, you. It’s not like anyone here knows you, or him.
Now spill the gossip. What the hell is going on?
I mean, that man has been hovering over you more than your mother, and I didn’t think that was possible.
” Autumn pushes a menu across the table to me, because she already knows what she wants.
She comes here so often she could probably recite the menu, back to front.
“All I can say is I’m thankful that you turned up this morning and helped me escape.” Glancing down, I see they have waffles with strawberries and Nutella, so I don’t need to look any further.
“Don’t avoid my question, Poppy. When I turned up to see you the day after you arrived home, Landon and the boys were there.
That man couldn’t look away from you. It was like you were some kind of magnet for his eyes.
” Autumn leans across the table toward me and is about to continue when the waitress walks up to us to take our orders.
Her words describing the way Landon looks at me keep repeating in my head, because they’re true.
After ordering breakfast, I open my mouth to try and change the subject, but Autumn is already straight back at me.
“I just don’t understand you two. It’s so crystal clear that you both want to pick up where you left off.
I mean, the man dropped everything, including his kids, and rushed to your side.
And you, missy, instead of calling your mother or your best friend, called Landon.
” She’s glaring at me now. “Surely that says it all.”
“It’s complicated,” I reply.
“For whom? You or him? Because I think it’s pretty obvious he knows what he wants. It’s written all over his face.” Autumn leans back in her seat, arms crossed and waiting for my answer. I know what she’s like. She won’t give up until she gets some sort of answer out of me.
“Both. Alright?” I admit, throwing my hands in the air.
“Okay, now we’re getting somewhere. What’s stopping Landon, and don’t bother saying it’s because you don’t live here, or that he’s worried about the boys. Those things are both easily solved. It has to be something more.”
“Me living in Rochester is not easily solved,” I bite back.
“I disagree, you’re currently living in Boston. Right. Next. Door.” Autumn smirks.
“Temporarily,” I huff.
“But it could be permanent. I mean, I wouldn’t complain. I’d even help you pack up your house.” Autumn is leaning forward again, elbows on the table and smiling at me. “Imagine how much fun it would be to be back in Boston. I’m sure your mom would love to have you back home.”
“Don’t do that. Emotional blackmail concerning my mother is cruel and you know it.” Mentally I can’t take that right now. Autumn’s face softens as she realizes how fragile I still am.
“I’m sorry.” She reaches over the table to grab my hand, giving it a reassuring squeeze. “Tell me your reasons why you’ve got your walls up for Landon, instead.”
“I thought you’re supposed to be my best friend. What’s with all the hard-hitting journalism this early in the morning?” I reply.
“This is the first time I’ve had you to myself since you got home. I swear your mom hasn’t been more than two feet away from us when I’ve been visiting,” Autumn whines.
I look around the restaurant for a minute, just trying to collect my thoughts.
“The truth is I don’t know what my answer is.
” I shrug. “I feel something for Landon, and it’s deeper than the sexual attraction that was between us at Christmas.
But why do I feel that way? Is it just because he came to me when I needed him, took control, and made me feel so safe?
Is it the tender kisses he lays on my forehead, or the way he wrapped me in his arms at night when the demons visited my dreams?
” Sighing, I’m now the one who’s squeezing Autumn’s hand, looking for support as I dig down deep into my soul.
“I’m still so fucked up in the head from the accident and not being able to remember it, that I just don’t think he needs to be dealing with that as well.
He has his own life he’s trying to manage and demons to battle. ”
“How did your first therapy session go yesterday? I know you said in your message that you liked her, that she’s easy to talk to.
And I’m not asking what you talked about, I just want to know, did it help?
” Autumn being so tender with me makes it harder to talk.
She’s never like this, and that’s why I love her.
She’s my hard-ass bitch of a friend. Loud, funny, and she’s got my back every single time.
Which I know is what she’s doing now, but I don’t need her sympathy. I need her strength and energy.
“I’m sure it will… eventually,” I remark as we both sit back in our seats so the waitress can place our orders down in front of us.
I look down at the waffles as she starts walking away.
“There is no way I’ll be able to eat all this.” I pick up my knife and fork. “But that doesn’t mean I’m not hungry. It looks so good.” With the first bite, I moan. “Oooohhh, it tastes superb.”
“Why do you think this is my favorite coffee shop?” Autumn mumbles back to me with a mouth full of food.
We settle in to eat before our food gets cold, which gives me a reprieve from the questions. Autumn doesn’t understand that I’ve been asking myself the same things about Landon since I called him that night.
But as much as I thought the conversation would move on, Autumn starts straight up where she left off. The second her last mouthful of food is gone, she opens her mouth to speak.
“Have you two talked about what’s between you?” she says before she takes a sip of coffee.
“No. Landon wanted to talk to me the morning after we got to Boston, but like you said, Mom is always around or otherwise it’s the boys.
Kade got sick with a stomach bug, so Landon wouldn’t come over to see me.
He was adamant that he should stay away so I didn’t get sick.
We talk on the phone, usually late at night.
He distracts me from my nightmares so I can sleep.
The topics of conversation are light and not about the nightmares, the fire, or what’s happening between us.
And now I kind of feel like the opportunity has passed and we’re drifting back into the friend zone.
Which is probably safer for the both of us right now,” I concede.
“Bullshit. Have you ever heard of the healing powers of sex? Not like mediocre sex or getting yourself off with a vibrator. But hot, hard, nail-you-to-the-wall kinda sex. I think Landon would make a great healer for that broken leg of yours.” Autumn just looks at me, trying to hold a straight face.
But it doesn’t work. Laughter bursts from both of us.
“The visions I have of him trying to lift me and my annoying cast, holding me against the wall and fucking me. Yeah, so sexy… not,” I get out between laughs.
“I bet if you gave him the chance, Landon would make it work for sure. Just think how good it would feel. All those negative thoughts would disappear for a while, and all you’d be concentrating on is screaming Landon’s name.”
And this is what I’ve missed. Being with Autumn in person and just chatting about anything and everything. Both the appropriate and the totally inappropriate, which makes it even more entertaining.
My best friend has no filter, and that’s just the way I like her.
“Well, that’s not going to happen, so you can stop talking about it.
Let’s shift the topic of conversation to your sex life.
I feel like I’ve been living in this little bubble, and I have no idea what’s going on around me.
” I pick up my coffee, which is already nearly cold by now, but I could still use the caffeine.
“You might not want to hear this story.” Autumn starts laughing.
“Well, now you have to tell me.” I’m sure this’ll be good.
“Okay, but don’t say I didn’t warn you. I was at Landon’s bar a couple of weeks ago with the girls from work.
It’s now on our frequent rotation of places to have a drink after work—oh, and to look for hot guys.
Anyway, I digress. It was late, and I had a seat at the bar.
Landon was in his office, and Adrian announced last call as he walked past me, placing a martini on the bar in front of me.
He tells me to take my time and he would give me a lift home once he finished up for the night. Did you know he lives not far from me?”
Oh no, I don’t like where this is going.
“No, because I’ve never met him. But you’d better not be about to say what I think you’re about to say. Autumn, you didn’t, did you? Please tell me you didn’t.” I can feel my bag vibrating next to me on the seat, but I ignore my phone while I wait for her answer.
“Landon thought it was funny,” Autumn replies, trying to smooth it over with me, but it’s not working.
“I don’t give a fuck what Landon thought. Did you sleep with Adrian?” Adjusting myself on the seat, I sit up straighter and glare at her.
“No, there wasn’t any sleeping, but there was most definitely fucking,” she says with a big smile on her face.
“Uggghhhhhh. Seriously. He’s Landon’s business partner.
That’s the equivalent of my boyfriend’s best friend.
We had a rule, no best friends of the guy we’re dating.
What were you thinking?” I can feel my annoyance at Autumn rising, and I don’t know why it’s bugging me so much.
I mean, we made that pact over fifteen years ago. Autumn’s a grown-ass woman.
“Your boyfriend, huh?” she says in jest.
“Fuck, not my boyfriend. Friend, neighbor, my mother’s now favorite son, whatever the fuck you want to call him.
Someone who’s off limits and so is his business partner.
And what does it mean, are you dating him now?
Because this is going to get awkward really quickly when you break up.
And you will break up because you don’t settle with any guy for very long, and Landon told me that Adrian’s a manwhore. ” I’m ranting.
“Settle down, Poppy, it was just a one-night thing. We had fun, that’s it.
Neither of us were looking for anything more.
It’s cool, so stop stressing.” She’s staring at me hard, trying to work out what’s happening.
“Can I just say, if I wasn’t worried before, I am now.
” Waving her hand back and forth in the air in front of me, she continues, “Because this right here, the escalation over nothing, this isn’t like you. ”
My bag is vibrating again now for the third time in a row. I stick my hand in my purse, fishing around for my phone while I bite back at Autumn.
“That’s because you don’t usually piss me off by doing dumb things,” I snap back at her, while I can hear my subconscious in the back of my head telling me to shut my mouth and take a breath. This is Autumn, we don’t argue like this.
The vibration stops again just as I finally have my phone in my hand. I’m about to drop it back in the bag, except it starts vibrating again, and it’s the thing that makes me snap.
Pulling it out angrily, I don’t even look at it, just swipe to answer so I can get rid of whoever this annoying person is. Haven’t they heard of leaving a message?
“What!” I answer furiously. I’ve never in my life spoken to anyone like this. What is wrong with me?
“Pops, finally. It’s about fucking time you answered. Why haven’t you returned my calls or messages?” And the moment I hear his voice, my stomach drops.
“Dean.” I shudder.
And my world starts to spiral again.
Why does this keep happening to me?