25. Twenty-Five
Twenty-Five
Abi
“I was…” I trailed off, taking in what Cash had just told me. “Blocked? You blocked me?”
“No,” he hastily replied. “I didn’t. I don’t even know how to block a number.”
“It’s not hard.” I arched my back away from him, using my palms to keep me upright on the blanket I had spread out by the lake.
The grass was damp, but the camping blanket I stuffed in Luna’s side pouch before meeting Cash kept us dry as we sat and ate lunch. Cash wasted no time in starting the conversation, even creating a small buffer by giving me a kiss before we set up the picnic. He knew what he was doing. Making me swoon before starting the talk. We needed to finish what we started last night; we had to get this all out on the table, but I honestly didn’t expect to hear what he told me.
I was blocked on his phone. Well, that explained why he only responded to me today.
“I promise you”—he leaned forward slightly, moving his legs to rest his elbow on his knee—“I didn’t. I meant what I said by you could call me, I just thought you didn’t want to. But then…” He swallowed. “I heard your voicemails.”
“Which ones?” I inhaled, nervous that he finally heard every single one. The drunken ones, the ones where I was crying and sobbing, and then the ones where I told him I was done with him.
“Stetson was lost…”
“Oh, ok.” I let out a breath of air. Phew. “ Those ones are nice.”
“Nice?”
I rolled my eyes. “Nicer. I may have left some pretty mean ones there towards the end. Well, when I thought it was the end.”
“Abi, I’m sorry. It was never an end…”
“But it was. I know I said this last night, but you just vanished. I was pretty certain I would never see you again.”
“I fucked up.”
“You kinda did.”
“You tried to call me, and text me, and I didn’t even try once.”
I tightened my lips. I had two ways I could take this. I could get up, mount my horse, and tell him I never wanted to see him again, basically rip up those big girl pants that Lachlan told me to put on, or—if I meant what I said last night—I could take a deep breath and think about what I really wanted from this. From him. From us. Take us, whatever we were, forward. Not stuck. We could go around and around this all day. It would be never ending. But that was just pointless.
There’s no way I could walk away from him.
“You swear you didn’t block me?” I lifted my chin and inched closer to him.
“I didn’t block you.” He met my gaze. “I don’t know how you got blocked. I had the face ID on my phone. I had passwords that only me and—” He stopped, his eyebrows pinching as a look of realization hit him. “Shit.” He mumbled, running his hand down his face.
“What?”
“This is a stretch…”
“Just tell me,” I sighed, wanting to hear his words.
“Carolyn.” Cash looked out to the lake. “She knew my passwords to my phone in case something happened. She carried it while I rode…she…I bet she…”
“You think she blocked me? Why just me? Why not Lachlan and Rhett and Wyatt and…” I let out a long sigh, allowing the dots to make sense. “Did she really hate me that much?”
“Abs…” Cash exasperated. “She really did. It could have been her.”
I shrugged a shoulder. “There’s no use in pointing fingers. It’s not like she’s here to defend herself, but…” But what? What did I want to say? It made sense, and I could once again overreact her or… “I just don’t think I care.”
Cash pinched his brow and turned to me. “What?”
“I don’t care. If you say you didn’t block me, then I believe you. It happened and it’s over and…” I shifted, reaching for my phone. I pulled up his name and typed out a quick text.
Me
It doesn’t matter.
His phone dinged, and his eyebrows raised. “Did you just text me?”
I smirked. “Maybe.”
He pulled out his phone and read the message, looking up at me once the three words hit him.
“It doesn’t matter.” I shrugged a shoulder. “Does it hurt? Sure. Do I want to punch you a little bit? Yes.”
“Ouch,” he muttered.
I scooted closer to him. “But it really, truly doesn’t matter. We need to go forward, right? I could be mad and scream and throw a brush at you, but if we want this”—I waved my hand between us—“what would that do other than take us back to five years ago? There’s absolutely no point in letting this linger. I want to move forward, don’t you?” I reached out and gently touched his cheek, cupping his face in my palm. “Do you want this?”
A moment passed before he nodded. “I can’t get you out of my head, Abi. I want this. I want you.”
He rested his forehead on mine, his dark eyes pulling me to him. As much as I hated to admit it…I couldn’t get him out of mine either. I swallowed my pride and ran my thumb along his jawline. Lifting my head from his, I gave him a soft smile.
“Don’t let this get to your head.” I grinned. “I can’t seem to get you out of mine either.”
His lips met mine in a sweet, soft kiss, one that barely felt like a whisper against me. His thumb traced the path his lips had touched, the sparks his lips caused only amplified by the calloused pad of his thumb.
“Call me, text me…every day,” he muttered. “I will answer. I will come to you.”
I silenced him with another kiss.
“You’re going to get sick of me,” I whispered into him.
“Impossible.”
Me
Stetson is demanding you come to dinner.
Cash
I’m with Quinn. Tell him I will be there as soon as I can.
Me
He won’t like that answer.
Cash
He won’t, or you won’t?
Me
Smart ass.
Cash
I told Quinn I’d stay for this appointment. She’s hoping to get the clear to go back to the arena. I’ll come to dinner right after I drop her off at her hotel.
Me
Bring her to dinner.
Cash
You sure?
Me
Absolutely. You know we have more than enough space.
Cash
Alright. I’m sure she’d love to get a few rides in tonight.
Me
You wanna ride?
Cash
When do I not.
“Abi?” Lachlan’s voice pulled me away from my phone, reminding me that I was very much in my father’s office, sitting next to my brothers with my dad at his desk, Lachlan up against the windowsill like he was the last time we had a meeting like this. “Who are you texting?”
“Wouldn’t you like to know.”
He raised an eyebrow, giving me the sign that he knew exactly who I was texting. I chewed my bottom lip.
“Ok, sorry.” I locked my phone. “Phone down.” I clutched it in my hands, feeling the small vibration from another text.
Rhett shook his head and chuckled.
I semi-hated these meetings with my father and brothers; they seemed so formal. Last time I sat in between Wyatt and Rhett, we went over the financials and Dad reminded us of his retirement plans, and since this was the third follow up with everyone, we all assumed he had some bigger news.
“Numbers?” My father sighed, standing up and leaning on his desk. “How are we looking?”
“Better,” I said with a smile. “The line is going up. We still need a little more, but with spring here, it should be easy. We have every stall full in the stable, I’ve been showing off the arena to more trainers, and Cash is still renting the arena.”
“When is Callahan done with the space?” Wyatt asked, shifting in his seat.
“Um…as soon as Quinn is ready to be back on the circuit, but I told him he was welcome back to use the arena as much as he needed or wanted to.” I looked from Wyatt to Lachlan, and then finally to my dad.
“That’s a great idea, like a permanent slot. Doesn’t he live in Montana, though?” Dad folded his arms.
Lachlan nodded. “He still has his house there, but he travels around with rodeos. Having him here permanently would be great, especially if and when he takes on more clients.”
“But would we charge him?” Rhett questioned. “I mean, he’s always been around…it doesn’t really feel right, does it?”
“And he’s been helping out around the ranch. Not sure if I could have gotten the roof fixed, the barn painted, and the fences up before calving season with just us. Having Cash around has been nice.” Lachlan agreed.
“I won’t charge him,” I said. “He’s been helping a lot, and Rhett’s right…I don’t feel right charging him.” I looked at my phone on my lap. “But I don’t know if he’s going to be staying.”
“Talk to him, see what he says. Maybe we can offer him a discount instead of not charging. We still need to make the money.” My dad gave me a nod. “Keep doing what you’re doing, putting these offers out there. It’s working. And Lach” —he turned to my cousin—“the place really does look great. Now—”
“Ah, the reason for the meeting!” Wyatt clapped his hand and rubbed his palms together.
“Your mom and I are heading out soon.”
“Officially retiring?” Rhett leaned forward.
Our father nodded. “I want to draft up the new title before we leave, so here’s my suggestion. Lachlan has fifty percent of it already, and after talking to him, thirty percent to Abi, fifteen percent to Rhett, and the remaining five to Wyatt.”
“I don’t need any of it, Dad.” Wyatt leaned forward in his chair.
“You’ll want enough to build a house on in the future, I guarantee it.”
Wyatt shrugged. “Maybe one day so…” He nodded, agreeing with him. “Yeah, I can take that five percent.”
Rhett and I locked gazes, and then he softly said, “I can live with fifteen percent.”
I pinched my brow at him. He deserved more than fifteen percent. Rhett took a deep breath, the life draining from his face. He didn’t like this either, and from what I was gathering, neither of us was going to say anything.
Dad smiled. “We’re planning on a trip to Europe in the beginning of May, so I’ll draft up a new title and have it ready to go before we leave.”
“You’ll be back for the Fourth?” Rhett asked, referring to the Fourth of July Hartwell Rodeo, the one rodeo of the year where this town went all out. Rhett was going to ride, Wyatt would announce, and Lachlan would set up the fireworks. Me? I’d make sure my son didn’t die from riding a sheep and maybe…
I smiled.
Maybe convince Cash to make his comeback.
“Most definitely. You know we wouldn’t miss that for the world. We have a few places planned to go this year, but home for the Fourth of July is exactly where we will be.”
“Perfect.” Lachlan pushed himself off the windowsill and slapped Rhett’s shoulder. “Come on Rhett, we have more to do today.”
Rhett stood, giving me one last glance before following Lachlan out the door.
I looked at my dad and attempted to give him the best smile I could.
Once it was just him and I in the office, I unlocked my phone to read the text from Cash, feeling a small flutter in my stomach. These damn butterflies.
Cash
Because I’m new to this…what’s your coffee order?
Me
My coffee order?
“Abi?” This time it was my dad to pull me out of my texting stupor.
“Hmm?” I hummed, raising my brow, once again ignoring the buzz in my hand.
“Did you hear me?”
Shit.
“Sorry…no. I was talking to”—I looked at my phone—“Kyla.”
He shook his head. Dad could always tell when I was lying. The look on his face, one eyebrow slightly raised, his eyes boring into me, that simple smirk growing as he tried to read my face. I did my best to keep myself composed, even though the buzz in my hand was happening again. Cash really wanted to know my coffee order, didn’t he?
“I asked if you were okay with this?”
“With keeping the numbers up? Yeah, I can do that, that’s easy.”
“No, the percentage we want you to take.”
“Oh.” I paused. “I mean…sure?” I shrugged a shoulder, the sure coming out in the form of a question rather than a statement, which I was sure gave him the indication that I was indeed not okay with it.
I still had no idea what I wanted when it came to the ranch. I loved it, that was evident, but did I love it enough to make it my entire life?
“Abi?”
“Yes, Dad, I’m fine with it,” I said. Maybe if I said it enough, I’d believe it. “Rhett and Lachlan seem on board…”
“You don’t seem to be on board. You were quiet today.”
I sighed, letting my shoulders drop as I tried to find the exact words to say.
“I’m just a little overwhelmed. I’ll be fine once the numbers are consistently going up. Speaking of”—I stood—“I need to make sure we have enough and place that feed order before dinner. Are we done?”
I could tell he didn’t believe a word I just said. “Yeah…We’re done.”
“See you at dinner, Pops.”