Chapter 49
Chapter Forty-Nine
MATT
My gaze wanders to Cole and Jordan for the hundredth time. They’re in the spectator seats.
My stomach’s twisted in knots, my palms are sweaty, and even still, I can’t help but smile every time I look at them together.
Cole’s been whispering to Jordan throughout the whole thing, and Jordan keeps glancing at the judge before leaning in, cupping his ear, and whispering back.
She catches me watching them and smiles.
Then she kisses her fingers and subtly turns them toward me.
I swear to God it eases some of the pressure.
“We’ll take a brief recess. I’d like to speak with Cole in my chambers,” the judge announces.
The courtroom breaks into a bustle of movement, hushed voices, people standing.
Jerry leans in. “This is important,” he murmurs. “At his age, his voice carries weight.” He claps me on the back. “I’m going to use the restroom, then I’ll be right back here in case the judge needs me. Be back in your seat in twenty minutes.”
He stands, and so do I, heading toward Jordan and Cole.
I hold out a fist to Cole as the guardian ad litem steps in to escort him to the judge’s chambers.
“Hey, buddy,” I say.
His eyes light up. “Hey, Matt,” he says, giving me bones before walking toward the door.
Jordan meets me with a kiss, her hands sliding along my biceps.
“How you holding up?” Her eyes search mine. “I think it’s going well,” she adds with a small smile.
“Thanks, babe. I’m fine. Not sure how I feel. I think I expected a little more from the guardian ad litem, but he seemed… neutral. Like Cole would be fine either way.”
“Yeah,” she agrees, her lips drawing into a line. “That was… disappointing.”
I let that settle. Technically, he would be okay either way.
I glance at Cece. She’s talking frantically with her lawyer, emotion written all over her face.
I know she’d take good care of him. I do. She’s not evil. She’s been good to Cole. He’s told me things that make me wonder if, all this time, we’ve just misunderstood each other. Christ, it’s so stupid—how we’ve let old shit dictate everything.
I could have tried harder.
But so could she.
And whether Cole will be fine with Cece isn’t really the point. Fine is a shitty baseline.
I don’t want him to be fine.
I want him to thrive. And I believe he will, eventually, with me and Jordan.
Jordan takes my hand. “You wanna go walk around or sit somewhere? What do you need?”
“I don’t know. A fucking drink? They serve liquor in this place, or is that frowned upon?”
She laughs softly.
I sober. “Let’s go walk around for a few minutes. I need to get out of this courtroom.”
“Sounds good to me.”
She follows me through the cluster of people clogging the doorway. We find an empty bench not far from the courtroom and sit.
“God, this is intense,” Jordan says. “Makes me feel for every parent who goes through a divorce. Especially when it isn’t amicable.”
My brow lifts. “No shit.” I let out a heavy exhale. “Christ, I feel like I can’t take a full breath.”
I tug at my tie, suddenly claustrophobic as shit. Sweat beads at my forehead, my pulse ticking faster. I yank my hand from Jordan’s and rub my palms against my pants. “Fuck,” I mutter. “I’m sweating.”
Jordan looks at me and I meet her gaze.
“Hey,” she says gently.
Her eyes are calm, strong, anchoring me from the panic climbing up my throat.
“We’ve done all we can do. Freaking out won’t help.
And babe—” She slides her hand onto my back, rubbing slow circles.
“You’ve done good. We’ve done good. Whatever happens now…
it was meant to be. And we’ll deal with it. Just like we always do.”
The corner of my mouth lifts.
How?
How did I get so damn lucky to have her in my life?
She gives a soft smile. “This is the kind of thing you’re good at, babe.
Showing up. Not quitting. You’re gonna make it out of this just fine, no matter how today ends.
And if you’ve taught Cole anything over the past twelve years, it’s this.
Resilience. You should be proud. I am.” She pauses, eyes watering.
“And I know Nate would be, too,” she whispers.
My heart pulses at the base of my throat, making it hard to swallow.
Christ, she always says the right thing.
She knows me. She’s intuitive. Nurturing.
And those qualities alone will make her an incredible mother.
Whether it’s only to Cole or also to our own children one day…
one thing’s for damn sure. She’ll kick ass at it.
I pull her into me and kiss her temple. “Thanks, babe,” I murmur. “I’m glad you’re here.”
“Me too,” she says.
People start filing back into the courtroom, and I glance at my watch.
“We better get back in there.”
We both stand and head to our seats, stealing a quick kiss before parting ways. I slide into my chair beside Jerry and glance around for Cole, but he hasn’t come back in. I try my best to steady myself—my pulse, my breathing, the goddamn sweat accumulating under my shirt.
The judge walks into the room and the bailiff stands. “All rise,” he says.
Everyone stands as the judge makes her way to the bench. I can’t help but admire the power she carries—how everyone’s gaze follows her, how the room goes silent.
“You may all be seated,” she says with an authority even I’m envious of.
Silence.
Anticipation hums through my veins. I glance at Jordan, needing her to ground me, keep me from losing my cool.
Cece’s attorney rises. “Your Honor, before the Court proceeds, my client has a request.”
My stomach drops. What is he doing?
My pulse crawls up my throat, settling between my ears, drowning out the rest of his sentence.
The judge looks at him. “Go ahead.”
“My client has decided to withdraw her petition for guardianship.”
Muffled gasps and murmurs bounce around in my brain.
No.
No way in hell he just said what I think he said.
I’ve lost my fucking mind.
I squeeze my eyes shut, then open them wide, making sure I’m coherent and awake. That I’m not imagining this.
He continues. “After careful consideration, and in light of the testimony presented, as well as the minor’s expressed wishes, my client believes this course of action is in Cole’s best interest.”
What?
I blink again, jaw slack, not fully comprehending.
My eyes sting anyway.
Jerry shoots me a look, one brow arched.
The judge looks directly at Cece. “Mrs. Henderson, is it your intention to voluntarily withdraw your petition?”
“It is,” Cece replies with a firm nod.
“And you understand this means the Court will proceed solely on Mr. Grayson’s petition?”
“Yes, Your Honor.”
Her eyes drift to me, locking onto mine as her tight-lipped expression melts into a soft smile.
What in the actual fuck is going on?
Part of me can’t believe it. Like it’s some cruel joke. But the look on Cece’s face tells me everything I need to know.
This is real. And for whatever reason… she had a sudden change of heart.
“Very well,” the judge says. “The Court will proceed on Mr. Grayson’s petition.” She looks down, flipping through her papers, her expression unreadable. And holy fucking hell, the seconds that felt like minutes in the first hearing suddenly feel like blips compared to this.
My knee bounces under the table, erratic. Jerry places a hand on my shoulder and leans in. “Relax. This is a good thing.”
I cling to his words like they’re a buoy in open water.
The judge finally looks up. Her eyes find mine first, then shift to Jerry.
“Based on the evidence presented, the guardian ad litem’s report, and the minor’s stated preference, the Court finds that granting guardianship to Mr. Grayson is in the best interest of the child.
Mrs. Henderson’s petition is formally withdrawn.
Mr. Grayson’s petition is granted, effective immediately. ”
I let out a shuddered breath and turn automatically toward Jordan. She’s already watching me, eyes shining as she wipes at the tears sliding down her cheeks.
Pressure loosens in my chest, relief rolling through me in waves. My shoulders ease. The sting in my eyes fades.
We did it.
We fucking did it.
I pull my gaze from Jordan, scanning the room until it lands on Cece.
Her cheeks are wet. Eyes red.
And the look on her face, a blend of pride and defeat. The kind that says, I know I’m doing the right thing, even though it might break me.
It tears at my heart.
We lock eyes, just long enough for her to take a deep breath and look away.
I’m on my feet before I can talk myself out of it, moving toward her without a single coherent thought. Just the need to do or say something.
I stop in front of her, awkward tension flickering between us even now.
I open my mouth, but the words don’t come out. They’re fucking stuck behind a hard lump of emotion lodged in my throat.
I swallow.
It doesn’t do shit.
Cece gives me a small smile, her cheeks still glistening. “It’s what Nathan would have wanted,” she says softly.
I’m struck dumb. There aren’t words big enough for this kind of gratitude.
She picks up her purse and slings it over her shoulder, turning to leave.
“Cece,” I say, my voice rough, hoarse.
She turns back.
“Thank you.” I nod too many times. “You can see Cole anytime. I mean that. I want you in his life. He needs you.”
“Thank you, Matthew.” Her voice trembles. “Cole’s lucky to have you. We’ll be in touch.” She glances down, then turns and walks away.
Jordan’s arms slide around my waist, and that’s it.
That’s the thing that does me in.
The composure I’ve been clinging to all day fractures.
A rough breath shudders out of me as I bury my face in her neck, exhaling the weight of the last three months. Nate’s death. The hearings. The waiting. Cole.
And her.
I breathe her in—the Prada perfume that always takes me back to our first kiss.
I pull myself together and straighten, my eyes landing on the guardian ad litem, Dave, as he walks toward us with Cole.
My grin comes easy.
“Hey, buddy.”
He smiles, and I pull him in for a hug.
“Matt?” he says, looking up at me.
“Yeah?”
“Can we get something for my Grandma? I told the judge I wanted to live with you. She told me not to feel bad, but… I do.”
“I think that’s a great idea.”
“And then can we get ice-cream?”
I laugh softly, glancing at Jordan, who’s smiling big. “Sure, buddy.”
I pat his back and reach for Jordan’s hand.
“Let’s go home.”