28. RAE
28
A little sooner than expected, we arrive at my family home, and Jensen parks the car in the driveway. A warm, fuzzy feeling settles inside of me when I look at the white house with a big porch. It’s one of those homes that looks even better with Christmas lights, and just thinking about decorating the tree with Lily this year makes me giddy like a child.
“Nice house.” Jensen lowers his head, taking in the building that represents my entire childhood.
Suddenly, I’m reminded of the fact that my entire family is waiting for me inside, and I start feeling a bit nervous to introduce him to everyone.
“Thanks,” I mumble as I get out of the car with a stone in my stomach.
Here goes nothing.
Leaving our stuff in the car for now, the boys follow behind me, and when we reach the porch steps, I quickly turn to face them with a slight scold.
“ Best behavior.”
Bodi and Jensen both nod their heads, albeit with mischievous smiles on their faces, but I’m deciding to trust them. Sucking in a deep breath, I slowly exhale before I swing the door open.
“Surprise!” We all jump at the unexpected noise directed at us, and I blink at the two-dozen people standing in the hallway.
Oh, no.
My entire family, plus neighbors, are standing in the hall with party hats on and birthday horns in their mouths. The house is decorated with blue and purple garlands. The smell of fresh apple pie wafts through the air while confetti explodes in front of us.
You have got to be kidding me.
“What the—” I hear Jensen huff under his breath as I bring my head up to the banner hanging on the ceiling that says: Happy birthday, Rae!
“It’s your birthday ?” Jensen grates.
“Err. Yeah,” I say, awkwardly. “Surprise?”
“And what, you forgot?” His breath tickles my neck as he hisses against my skin.
Of course, I didn’t forget. But I didn’t think they were planning a surprise party. I thought we’d have dinner; Nana would make some fried chicken, maybe an apple pie and we’d have cheesecake from Lou’s for dessert. It’s not like twenty-four is a special birthday?
“I didn’t wanna make a big deal out of it.”
“Maybe you should’ve mentioned that to your family,” he mumbles.
“Not now, Jensen,” I sing-song with a tight smile still in place, taking a step forward to greet my eager looking family.
His firm hand grabs my shirt, holding me back for another moment as he puts his mouth flush with my ear.
“I’m gonna get you back somehow, Stafford.”
Stiffly, I let out a chuckle before Lily runs into my legs, wrapping her arms tightly around my thighs.
“Hey, pretty girl.” I grab her by the arm, then lift her onto my hip before burying my nose into her blonde hair while her white puffy dress falls over my arms. She smells like her vanilla scented Disney Princess shampoo, and I suck in the smell, reminding me that I’m really home.
“I missed you,” she says.
“I missed you too. Boys, this is my little sister, Lily.”
“Who are you?” She brings her head up, her dark blue eyes beaming at Jensen as people slowly move in our space.
“I’m Jensen.” He gives her a small wave. “And this is Bodi.”
Bodi does the same, and she waves back to them sweetly.
“Are these your boyfriends?”
The entire room laughs, and I can feel my cheeks blush when I glance at Jensen, not sure how to introduce him.
Either of them.
“These are my friends.” I go for. “This is Jensen, and that’s Bodi. Boys, this is my little sister Lily.”
“Those are weird names.” Lily scrunches her nose, and I cover her mouth with my hand, offering the boys an apologetic smile.
“Lily,” I reprimand, “I know, but we don’t say that out loud.”
Amusingly, both Jensen and Bodi cross their arms in front of their bodies with modest glares.
“Welcome, boys.” My aunt comes to my side, taking Lily from me, then offers them her hand. “I’m June. Nice to meet you.”
I smile at the sight of her, my eyes raking over her light blue sundress. She looks gorgeous as always, her intense hazel eyes and auburn hair reminding me of my mother’s.
They both introduce themselves once more, like real gentlemen, and I can see my aunt give them both a look of approval, before she presses a quick kiss to my forehead.
“Johnny told me you were staying. Sorry, we didn’t inform you about the party. Let me show you to your rooms, and you can take a minute to freshen up,” she offers before she walks them upstairs, showing them the guest room. Jensen lingers, licking his lips when he brushes past me. His eyes move to my mouth, then quickly glance behind me at the people still waiting for me to greet them properly.
He wants to kiss me; I can see it in his eyes. But instead, he just strokes my stomach, passing by before he trails behind Bodi, shooting me a wink as he walks up the stairs.
My heart flutters, and I let out a deep sigh, right in time, before the small crowd is hovering around me.
“Hello everyone!” But before I can properly welcome everyone, brown hair bolts through the people in front of me, jumping my neck.
I laugh as her body slams into mine, squeezing me tight before she whispers: “It’s a good thing you’re staying because you ain’t going anywhere before you’ve told me who those hot motherfuckers are.”
***
Twenty minutes later, I have a glass of wine in my hand, a cupcake in my belly, and my cousin Kayla hanging on my hip as I tell her about the last week. And by hanging on my hip, I mean, she cornered me and is now interrogating me like the fucking FBI. But in her defense, I would’ve done the same if she brought a guy home for her birthday.
“Okay, so what about that Emily girl? Isn’t he supposed to marry her or something?”
Anxiety hits me hard, just thinking about him marrying Emily, but the same question has been going through my own mind at least once a day.
“I don’t know, Keeks.” I take another sip of my wine, avoiding looking at her. “I don’t even know when he might be leaving?”
“Is he still expecting you to go to New York with him?”
“I don’t know!” I screech, looking up at the sky.
I don’t think he is, but who knows at this point. We haven’t really talked about what happens next, both set on enjoying whatever time we have together. Technically, we are not together.
“Are you going to if he does?”
I slowly turn my head to her. Her curly brown hair is voluminous, with highlights shining in the sun, bringing out her bright blue eyes. The signature of the Lockheart family.
“Am I going to New York if he asks me to?” Fuck no. I’m not going to torture myself by convincing his ex that there is nothing going on between us. Besides, when I made that agreement, there wasn’t anything going on between us. While right now I feel like a hypocrite even thinking about it, I don’t want to make life harder on him either. I know he will have to go through a bunch of shit if he doesn’t get back together with Emily.
“I don’t know.” I shake my head. “I really, really don’t know, Kayla. I don’t want to. But I also don’t want to fuck up his life. Argh! How did my life get so complicated all of a sudden?” I growl.
Bringing my glass to my lips, I down the whole thing out of frustration, then pull Kayla’s glass out of her hand to continue with hers.
“Hey! That’s mine!”
“You’re nineteen. You’re not allowed to drink anyway.”
“June said I could,” she mopes.
“Don’t worry. I’ll get us another one in a minute.”
She mumbles something, but I ignore her, thinking about the man now walking through my childhood home. I don’t want him to go, but I feel like his leaving is inevitable. Our worlds don’t match in any kind of way, and I can’t expect him to shove his parents aside, even if they treat him like shit.
I’m terrified to even bring it up, because I don’t think I can handle the rejection if he’s planning to get back together with Emily after this weekend.
Fake relationship or not.
“Speaking of the devil.” I follow Kayla’s gaze.
Bodi and Jensen step out of the kitchen and into the yard. Jensen roams the yard, until his eyes lock with mine, shooting that same desire-filled look my way that I’ve become so familiar with. My heart jumps, and I hold his gaze with a faint smile, as we stare at each other like we’re the only people around, until Johnny takes up his attention.
“Fuck, Rae. No chance that boy is thinking about his ex. He’s smitten.”
“He’s not smitten.” I blush, bringing my glass to my lips again before I question my own words by following them up with the next. “He got my boots tattooed.”
Kayla’s eyes almost rolled out of her head, mouth agape. “Excuse me?”
I stare at the white gold liquid in my glass, avoiding her sharp gaze drilled into my side.
“You’re serious?” My cousin presses with a look that’s nothing short of a scary bad cop. “Why your boots?”
“I was wearing them when he first kissed me.”
Saying it out loud makes it sound ridiculous. The man got a tattoo to remind him of the first night he kissed me.
That doesn’t happen to me. It happens in fucking Hallmark movies.
Her chocolaty brown hair dances around her bubbly face as she vigorously shakes her head, huffing and puffing like she’s out of air before sucking in a lungful.
“No, you’re right. He’s not smitten . He’s head over heels.” Kayla boldly plucks her glass back, drinking the thing all in one go.
“Shut up, Keeks.”
“You shut up. I almost had an orgasm watching him eat you with his eyes from a mile away. He wants you.”
“You don’t know shit,” I counter.
“It’s hard to deny when he is undressing you with his mind. Gah, he makes me swoon.” She flutters her lashes, waving her jeans jacket up and down for air and I chuckle at her silly face.
“Yeah, you and me both, girl.”
I look at Jensen again, my heart racing at just the sight of him, hypnotized by his fearless smile. I have no clue what’s going on between us. All I know is that he makes me feel things I never thought possible, but I can’t shake the sense that all good things come to an end. And I have a feeling our time is running out.