New Home for the Holidays (12 Days of Christmas)

CHAPTER 1

WALKER

As I drive through Wintervale with my head on a swivel while on shift, something starts to settle in my chest. Before I made this move, I wasn’t sure if it would be the right one for me. Moving from the small town of Jasper Ridge, Wyoming, to another small town in Montana wasn’t what I was looking for when I first started my search for a police force to move to.

I thought I was going to find a place in a big city, somewhere with a little more excitement, but I still applied to a few small towns. I didn’t see how I could advance on the force in Jasper Ridge, but didn’t assume I couldn’t have that opportunity down the road in another small town.

After a few interviews nothing felt right to me, much to my frustration. Something different happened when I visited Wintervale and went through the interview process. It was like I could breathe again. No one was more surprised than I was.

After my dad died from a heart attack almost two years ago, it felt like I was only playacting in my life. Jasper Ridge became a big reminder of losing the only parent I had any memory of, since my mom died after giving birth to me. Her death could have made my dad bitter; it could have made him hate to even look at me. Thankfully, neither happened and he was the best man I’ve ever known.

Needing more excitement, and, maybe, the possibility to move the needle on my career were the reasons I gave people when the news of my job hunt became public knowledge. Really, I just needed a fresh start away from the only home I’d ever known. It felt less and less like home the longer Dad was gone.

I couldn’t hide the truth from everyone. Jade, my best friend since childhood, who has been like a sister to me for as long as I can remember, saw right through my bullshit. She encouraged me to go and find somewhere else to call home.

Of course, she had to put it all girly and shit.

Once she heard the rumors about me interviewing places, she tracked me down. The stern look on her face accompanied her accusatory words, “You’ve been avoiding me.”

“No,” I tried to dismiss her very correct assertion, “I haven’t. Don’t be ridiculous.”

Her eyes narrowed at me, and I started to crumble. Yes, a police officer who has been trained to run toward danger instead of away from it, started to fold in the face of my best friend’s anger. I’m still not sure what she saw written on my face, though I had gotten adept at hiding my feelings from everyone, including her, but her face softened, and her glare dissipated.

“If you’ve been avoiding me to prevent me from bringing up the rumors circulating around town, you don’t need to,” she coaxed me gently.

Not ready to give up the ghost completely, I scoffed, “What rumors?”

Jade rolled her eyes, and her hands fisted as she slammed them down against her hips. The fire which blazed in her eyes was because I was being willfully obtuse. I knew it. She knew it.

“Like you don’t know about the rumors,” she lobbed right back at me.

I’m not sure how long we stared at each other, but I definitely broke first even though I won’t be admitting that out loud any time soon. “Fine,” I hissed and leveled her with a glare of my own as I relented. “Yes, I’ve put in applications at forces across the country. I’ve done some preliminary interviews and will travel to do second ones in a few places.”

Jade swallowed hard and her eyes welled up with unshed tears. I cursed under my breath and pulled her against my chest to comfort her. As we hugged each other, I couldn’t help but berate her, “This is exactly why I didn’t want to say anything.”

“You think I’m about to cry because you’ll be leaving?” She pulled away from me, the fire back in her eyes. I welcomed it; anything’s better than her on the verge of tears. I can’t handle women crying, especially someone who has been my sister from another mister for so damn long. “Don’t be a moron, Walker,” she sneered at me.

I blinked at her a few times, having an issue downshifting as fast as she was requiring of me in the conversation. We stared at each other for a few moments before we both started laughing. It cut the tension, and I felt some of the stress of my decision and my worries about moving melting away.

Knowing you’re doing the right thing for you is one thing, but actually doing it while knowing you’ll be leaving behind everything you’ve known for your whole life, is another. It wasn’t like I wanted to escape everything about Jasper Ridge. I just needed to get away from the memories. I needed to find something that was just mine, something to fill the empty cracks losing Dad left behind in my soul.

I wasn’t even sure if I could find it, but I figured not trying would be worse. It wasn’t like I had a lot going for me beyond being a police officer. I hadn’t dated in over a year and even then, it didn’t end well because she couldn’t handle the hours and my commitment to my job. Hell, I didn’t even put as much effort into dating her as I should have because I felt broken. Broken and more than a little battered by grief.

Once we stopped laughing, Jade gave me a small, tremulous smile. “I’m going to miss you, Walker, you know that,” her words were emphatic, and I felt them to the depths of my soul. I was going to miss her too and she knew it just as well. “But I’m also so fucking proud of you.”

My eyebrows hit my hairline, and my mouth was hanging open which caused her to giggle softly. When I got my shit together, all I could do was gasp, “What?”

“You’ve been walking through life, just going through the motions, since your dad died,” her voice was gentle, almost like she was talking to a wounded wild animal. The mention of Dad and his death made me feel like one.

I wondered, not for the first time, if I shouldn’t have been over it already. I knew it was ridiculous because there is no right way when it comes to grief, but that didn’t make the feeling of inadequacy over not dealing with it well go away. It felt a lot like shame.

Jade must have read my thoughts, a byproduct of us being close, because she snapped, “Don’t do that.”

I grumbled, “Do what?”

She punched my shoulder like we were still kids, and I was making fun of her for something silly, like the small gap between her two front teeth until all her adult teeth came in and it closed right up. I grabbed my shoulder and gave her a quelling look, but she knew she could get away with that shit. She’d done it for so damn long and it wasn’t going to change any time soon.

“Don’t try and tell yourself you should be over it. If you’re not, then you’re not. It’s just that simple.” Her eyes softened and she shook her head. “As much as I’m going to miss my best friend, I’m glad you’re leaving. You need something new, somewhere ,” she emphasized the word in a way which made my stomach clench because she knew exactly why I needed to leave, “new.”

“You don’t think I’m just running?” Giving voice to my deepest fear in looking to leave Jasper Ridge had sweat breaking out on my brow.

“No,” there was steel in the one word, unmovable and filled with grit. “You’re not running. You’re searching.”

I nodded and tried to swallow past the lump in my throat. It wasn’t easy. Even though I didn’t even know where I’d be going, or even if I would be going since I wasn’t leaving without a job lined up, I was already dreading saying goodbye to her.

“And anyway,” there was a teasing lilt to her voice, “maybe if you’re gone people will stop asking us when we’re going to finally get together and I can find myself a guy who will stick around.”

I barked out a laugh and shook my head at her while feeling lighter than I had in a long fucking time. She wasn’t wrong. Ever since we became friends when we were practically still in diapers, the town of Jasper Ridge decided we made the perfect couple. Would our lives have been easier if that were in the cards for us? Maybe.

But neither of us were interested in the other in that way. We never even tried. Sure, I could appreciate that Jade grew up into a beautiful woman, but that’s all it was. There wasn’t any spark of attraction between us. We both deserved to feel that for whoever we ended up with and settling for less wasn’t the way to find it.

After that conversation, for whatever reason, things seemed to move faster. Now, only a few months later, I’m in Wintervale and the holidays are right around the corner. I’m not looking forward to them, not by a long shot, but I’m also not dreading them the way I did the last few years without Dad around.

He always went above and beyond when it came to the holidays. I think it was because he was trying to make up for Mom not being there to celebrate with us. He tried to give me the joy and magic she would have added to the season.

What he never understood was having him was enough. Fuck, the man was my hero and no matter how old I got it never changed. He was my parent, sure, but he was so much more. He was the foundation of my life and without him I’ve been feeling the floor shift underneath me.

I pull over on the outskirts of Wintervale to sit back and see if anyone decides to test the speed limit while coming into town. There are a few ranches and homes out that way, but I’m not expecting much. Since moving to Wintervale, the crime has been exactly what I expected—pretty much nonexistent.

Don’t get me wrong, as much as I was willing to go to the city and see more action, I’m just as happy to not have to deal with hardened criminals. That doesn’t mean there aren’t ever calls to respond to, but they’d be a lot heavier in the city. Both in number and in the mental or physical toll they would take.

Wintervale has a good feel and speed to it. The people around town are nice, which has made it easy to settle in. Even better? The other guys on the force with me aren’t complete dicks who took one look at me and tried to shut me out just because I didn’t grow up with them.

I’m not sure what I would have done if that had happened. I’m glad it didn’t. I’ve become friends with one of my fellow officers, Jared Taylor. I’m not sure why, since everyone’s been welcoming, but we’ve clicked since the day I started my new job.

As I settle in with my radar gun, I zone out a little bit and think about how intent Jared is to get me out in town more. I haven’t been fighting him on it since I’m still new, but I also haven’t met anyone who has sparked more than a friendly conversation and a sense of community.

When I see a car approaching which looks like it’s going a little faster than it should, I use my radar to clock the speed and lock it on the screen as they pass me. The shock of blonde hair I see has my heart pounding in my chest for some unknown reason and there’s a pulling feeling in my gut.

I’ve never been one to ignore my gut. Sure, they’re not going dangerously fast, but that doesn’t stop me from pulling out behind them and switching on my lights and siren. I’m not even sure why until it’s already done. Every moment it takes me to get out of my vehicle and approach the car I’ve pulled over feels much longer than it is.

There’s no explanation for what I’m feeling right now. None at fucking all.

The driver’s window is already open when I get to it, and I’m momentarily stunned by the beautiful woman looking at me with amusement in her eyes even though she doesn’t say anything. I have no idea what the look she’s giving me is about, but I hate it when her eyebrows pull together in confusion.

“Oh, you’re not who I was expecting,” she blurts, her eyes going wide like she didn’t mean to say the words out loud.

For a second, the only thing I can hear is the blood rushing through my veins as anger simmers through me at the thought of her expecting anyone, especially a man or a fellow officer. With a deep breath, I force myself to calm down because my reaction makes no fucking sense. I don’t know this woman; I’ve never seen her before.

But she’s the most stunning woman I’ve ever seen in my life. The blue of her eyes is light, like crystals or water so fucking clear that you feel desperate to drown in it. I’ve never seen anything like them, and it feels like I can’t breathe for a moment, like I am drowning.

If this is how I go, I’m not going to complain.

Her lips are light pink and perfectly pouty. I wonder if they’ll get redder and plumper after kissing her. Would the blush coloring her cheeks extend to other areas of her body if I were to tell her all the filthy fucking things I’m thinking about right now?

Even though her blonde hair is piled high on top of her head, I know, just fucking know, it’ll be long and drape down her back like silk. The vision of how it would look as she’s sitting reverse cowgirl on my lap and dancing for me with every thrust upward has my cock thickening behind my fly.

I try and shake my head and swallow, but my mouth has gone dry. It’s for the best because I can’t trust what would come out of my mouth right now. She’s fucking stunning. Gorgeous. Otherworldly.

Mine.

“Officer?” Her soft voice jolts me back to the present and I try and shake off the lust trying to overtake me. Her eyes flick over my chest and I can’t help but puff up a little, hoping to see appreciation in her gaze. “Everything okay, Officer Montgomery?”

I clear my throat. “Do you know how fast you were going?”

“I’m sorry,” her words are filled with sincerity as she hands me her license and registration without me needing to ask for it, but I don’t look at it.

My hackles rise and I can’t keep the hint of irritation out of my voice, “Get pulled over often?”

“No,” she whispers, “this is a first for me. I was just coming from my parents’ place and was singing along to some music. I didn’t realize I was speeding,” she babbles. She blinks a few times, a meekness in her voice which makes me want to wrap my arms around her and protect her. “I was speeding, though, right? That’s what you’re saying and why you pulled me over?”

Fuck.

Something about her makes me incredibly glad I pulled her over while feeling like the worst piece of shit ever to exist because I’ve done my job. “You were speeding,” I grumble, not wanting to admit it.

Her face falls and it tears at something inside of me. I never want to see that look on her face again. My shoulder slump because I’ve made her feel anything other than blissful happiness.

As I shove her license and registration back inside her car, unable to force myself away to go and run the information, even though I should, I keep my voice soft and soothing, “You weren’t going far above the limit. Just be careful out there. There are some icy patches, and I would hate to see you get in an accident.”

Even the notion of her being hurt has my chest constricting painfully. What the hell is going on right now?

“Th-thank you, Officer Montgomery,” she breathes out.

My cock throbs at the way she addresses me and the tone of her voice. I need to get the fuck out of here. I give a nod and turn to step away from the car, but something tugs me back.

“What’s your name?” The question tumbles from my lips before I can stop it. Don’t even ask what the hell is wrong with me because I’m wondering the same damn thing.

“Morgan,” there’s confusion in her voice.

But I don’t stick around. I can’t. Then I sit in my vehicle and watch Morgan’s car disappear while wondering if I’ll ever see her again.