Chapter 21 Elizabeth
ELIZABETH
@pancakesareelite:
I can’t play tonight. I have a call with my gran. She’s my favorite person in the world. IRL.
@theanswerisno:
What’s she like?
@pancakesareelite:
So sassy
@theanswerisno:
Oh, I’m so surprised. I never would have thought anyone related to you could be sassy
@pancakesareelite:
Ha ha ha. I’m actually named after her
@pancakesareelite:
And it’s an honor to resemble her in any way or form. What’s your gran like?
@theanswerisno:
They both passed away when I was little
@pancakesareelite:
I’m so sorry
@theanswerisno:
I feel like I’m always sharing sad stuff. I’m a sad boy, not a bad boy
@pancakesareelite:
You have that in common with all the hot TV villains I end up falling in love with
My brain was liquid. Mush. I couldn’t follow a coherent thought. After a bajillion hours of engineering design, I was ready to drain it through my ears into a jar and stick it at the back of my kitchen cabinet never to be used again.
But I wouldn’t. Because that would mean forgetting everything else about this evening. Seeing Mr. Carden—Lincoln in his element. The intensity of his face while designing, the excitement when levels lined up. Better yet, the pride when I had a good idea.
Honestly, at some point in the night, he started feeling like my Link, and the design felt like one of the games we played. It reminded me of the early days where Link was the one who walked me through many games after most of the other players had lost their patience.
My chest ached in the strangest way.
Was I mistaken? Was it wishful thinking? If he wasn’t Link, would I be disappointed?
Yes.
I knew that to be true now.
It didn’t make either of them any less perfect.
I was in trouble. Big trouble. With Lincoln’s unforgivable sculpted body, gentle manner, and brilliant brain, I couldn’t handle him—if I was forced to add my Link, my safe space, to this Lincoln, I wouldn’t stand a chance.
But I needed to know. Now. Before I fell even deeper. Before I drowned.
And it was this flurry of thoughts that had me reaching for my phone. If I could call Link, I would, and I’d know from the depth of his voice whether he was Lincoln.
But I didn’t have his number. We only ever chatted in-app, and his settings had calls disabled, or at least disabled with me.
So I did all I could and messaged him instead.
@pancakesareelite:
Let’s meet at the Overpower LAN.
It didn’t matter that we’d been up for most of the night working, Lincoln looked fresh the next morning in his well-fitted white shirt and gray chinos. His focus was on his phone, but when I walked in, he looked up. As soon as those brown eyes met mine, he smiled.
Yes, it was that lopsided grin, but still my breath caught.
I had once lived a life in the limelight where I was photographed at award shows and stalked by journalists and young actors, yet nothing compared to the adrenaline that flowed through me in the moments of rare attention I got from Mr. Lincoln Carden.
“Good morning, Link-in,” I said, pausing ever so slightly between the two syllables. My blood stopped as I analyzed his every micro facial expression.
But there was nothing. Just a sideways glance at his phone.
“Good morning, Elizabeth,” he said with his usual sigh, except his frustration didn’t seem linked to me. “Anders and Cedric want to meet with you to discuss the design.”
My stomach jumped into my throat, and any inkling of peace that once resided in me disappeared into thin air.
He stood, taking two quick steps toward me. He lifted his hand as though to touch me but then decided against it. “Do you want me to come along?”
I wanted him to. Desperately. But I had to learn to do these things on my own. I shook my head, and he flopped back into his seat.
“You already wasted an entire evening with me yesterday. You can do your work. I’ll survive. Probably.”
“I don’t mind.” He lifted his noise-canceling headset and paused.
I could swear his soft brown gaze raked across my body, even just for a second before settling on my eyes. Much better than when he avoided looking at me.
A touch of red covered his cheeks before he added, “I also didn’t mind last night. It was fun. I guess I’m never beating the dweeb allegations.”
I grinned. The anxiousness in my belly was joined by something else. “Careful. I may ask you to do it again.”
“Let’s,” he said, the headset half on his head, half off.
“Seriously?”
“Yeah. You have so little knowledge, there’s a lot of room for improvement,” he said, and while the comment had my mouth dropping open, it wasn’t an insult. Lincoln Carden was teasing me.
Crackles of excitement went off in my chest. This was new.
“But go off to your meeting. We’ll talk after,” he said.
I nodded, grabbed our drawings, and went upstairs to where Cedric, Mr. Anders, and the senior structural engineer waited in the boardroom.
“Gordon-Bettencourt,” Anders said.
Cedric mouthed, Seven.
I greeted them with my best smile and willed the nerves out of my hands as I unsteadily laid the drawings on the desk for them to scrutinize. Cedric sneered while the other two looked through it.
“I don’t see any red flags. Has Carden checked it?” Anders asked.
“It was probably designed by Mr. Carden,” Cedric huffed out.
Anders and the other engineer looked up at me, eyebrows raised. “Was it?”
I swallowed hard, unsure of what the correct answer would be. “He assisted… a bit.”
“Oh,” Anders said, the impressed look he wore earlier disappearing. “It was your task.”
“I know, and I did it.”
“Obviously. There’s no north arrow,” Cedric said, and if I was a violent person, now would be the time I’d punch him.
“Mr. Carden wanted to ensure the design was sound before we finalized the presentation.” I then ran through the guidelines we’d used and assumptions we’d made.
“All right.” Anders sighed. “But if I wanted Carden to do it, I’d have asked him.”
The heaviness of his tone tightened around my words.
I stood frozen for a second before choking out, “Understood. I’ll add the arrow and get Mr. Carden to sign it, unless you have any other changes you’d like me to make?
” I steadied my voice as best I could, but I was defeated and exhausted.
I’d slept for around two hours, and this wasn’t how I planned the morning to go.
Regardless of what they said, I was proud of this design. That stupid north arrow.
“That’s all from me.” Mr. Anders looked at the other two, who shrugged.
I rolled up the drawing and walked downstairs to the office.
Lincoln pulled the headset down to his neck as I entered. “And?”
“And the design is fine, but um”—I struggled to keep the shake from my voice—“they’re disappointed that I couldn’t do it on my own.”
“What? Did they say that?” His brows drew close, and that familiar frown returned.
I nodded and shook it off. “Whatever. I don’t care anyway.” I didn’t want to discuss it anymore. “I’m going out for a short coffee break. Do you want anything?”
“No, thank you,” he said, his voice clipped. Perhaps he was also disappointed in me. Well, he could join the club.
Keeping my head down, I stomped out of the office building while avoiding everyone.
I hadn’t spent much time walking around, but today I would find a coffee shop, order the most delectable drink on the menu, and gulp it down before going back to the office to figure out whether I had what it takes to be an engineer.
After about ten minutes, I spotted a neon sign that read THE ARCADE CAFE and wandered into it. The smell of freshly ground beans was already soothing, and on one side of the store stood old arcade machines.
Coffee shops were some of the best places in the world. Aside from being an essential service, it was always hot with steam and filled with chatter and satisfied people getting their fix. And baristas were always friendly with me. Even though it was superficial, it was nice.
“Could I get a cinnamon mocha, please?” I asked.
The handsome barista nodded and offered me a somewhat suggestive smile.
It had been ages since I’d hooked up with someone. Perhaps I needed it. Maybe it would help with all the big feelings fighting for attention in my head and heart. Maybe it would get Link and Lincoln out of my head.
Yeah, right.
Sitting at one of the tables, I dropped my head into my hands and listened to the sound of the arcade machines.
I was tempted to join them and play a few rounds, but if I did, I feared I may never leave.
I would stay in this store and dedicate my life to Puzzle Bobble and drink a worrying amount of coffee.
“Here you go.” The barista’s gaze danced with charm and flirtation.
Generally, I’d reciprocate. But when I searched for that feeling, it wasn’t there.
I smiled at him nonetheless and sipped on the overly sweet but delicious coffee.
With each sip, the warmth of the beverage melted the ice within me.
And by the time the mug was empty, I was ready to go back to the office.
It was one task. I could do better next time. I could overcome this.
I’d overcome so much more.
“Anything else for you, love?” the barista asked, returning.
“One coffee to go. Sugar and cream. Please.”
Even though Lincoln said he didn’t want anything, I owed him for all the sandwiches.
With his coffee heating my palm, I hurried back to the office. I was out longer than the allowed break, but after spending so many hours working overtime, I needed it.
From the corner of my eye, I spotted Alistair. I sped up but already knew he would keep following. My hand shook around the cup of coffee. Had it not been for the white plastic lid, it would have spilled. “I told you to leave me alone.”
“I’ve come to deliver his message, seeing as you won’t see him.”
I reached my free hand into my pocket and fished out my fob as I neared my building. Ahead of me were two engineers having a chat outside the door. I stopped and spun around. No one else needed to see this happening. “I don’t want to hear it.”
Alistair leaned against the wall and shoved his hand into his jacket pocket. “He knows you’re bad-mouthing him to your mother and giving her ideas of a life without him. She won’t survive on her own. Neither can you. And you’ll see that soon enough.”
I tore my gaze away from him as his words splintered my heart. I could hear Douglas saying it, and I relived every moment he had belittled me. My self-esteem plummeted. What if he was right?
The engineers left, and the entrance to the office stood empty. I hurried toward the door and tapped my fob against the scanner. It clicked open, and I slipped inside, but not before hearing him say, “You can’t keep ignoring me. I’ll be back until you agree to leave her alone.”