Chapter Thirty-Two
Dean
The city of Boston knew how to throw a parade.
It felt like the entire population had turned out to celebrate the Terriers’ Stanley Cup win.
I wasn’t sure I had ever seen so many drunk people before in my life.
Not even at one of our concerts. But people seemed to be really enjoying themselves, laughing, cheering, and screaming for their favorite team.
Maverick and I had stayed hidden by the Garden Arena, where the crowds wouldn’t see us.
Where we could enjoy the celebration without worrying about anyone realizing who we were.
Maverick hadn’t stopped smiling. I couldn’t remember the last time I had seen my brother so happy.
The glow on his cheeks. The sparkle in his eyes.
It felt like Mav had finally found himself, and that was all because of Jackson.
He was wearing a Terriers baseball cap on his head, the bill pulled down to cover his face, as he clapped his hands along to the crowd, laughing and shouting along with everyone.
“What?” He nudged my arm. “Why are you staring at me like that? Are you not having a good time?”
I was. I was having the best time, and I hated that I had to leave tomorrow to go back to California. I shook my head. “I’m having a great time,” I assured him.
“But?” Maverick’s brows shot up. “Come with me.” He grabbed my arm so we could move into the arena, where it wasn’t so loud. “Are you having second thoughts about Beau? I thought the two of you were getting along.”
I chewed on my bottom lip. “I don’t want to go home.”
“Oh.” Maverick’s mouth formed a little circle.
“Does Beau know this?” He pushed the hat back on his forehead.
“God, I hate wearing these. I don’t know how other guys do it.
” He finally yanked it off his head and dragged his fingers through his white hair before he spoke again.
“You could stay, you know. Our couch is always open, or you could get your own place. Maybe something will open up where we live. We could be neighbors.”
Fuck, I had missed this version of my brother. The one that loved me and wanted to protect me. “That would be great. I’d love that.” My thoughts went to the house Maverick had in California. The one I had been to once before he slammed the door in my face. “What about your place back in LA?”
“I found someone to buy it. Had a lot of my stuff put in storage because I honestly don’t want or need it right now.
” He shrugged his shoulders. “Dean, I’m the happiest I’ve ever been in my entire life.
The only thing I care about from that house are some pictures, my drums, and the Grammy’s we won. Fuck everything else.”
I reached out to wrap my arms around him. “I love you, Mav. I hope you know that.”
“I know you, too.” Maverick hugged me back. “And this thing with Beau?” He pulled back to look at me. “I know it’s new, but I want you to be happy. You can talk to me.”
I chuckled. “Can I?”
“Of course.” Maverick nodded.
This should be fun. “Okay, what’s sex like?”
“Sex?” Mav’s face turned pink. “Uh...”
I grinned. “Yeah, you know, anal sex. I’m assuming that you’re the bottom in this relationship, no offense, so tell me how good it feels. Can you come untouched? Have you ever had a prostate orgasm?”
“Dean!” Maverick slapped both hands over his ears as he shook his head. “Please don’t ask me these things. Sex is great, it feels amazing, but no. I don’t want to discuss it with you.” Then he dropped his arms. “Wait, are you thinking of having sex with Beau?”
I grinned. “I am, yes.”
“And you want to, uh, bottom for him?” Once again, Maverick’s cheeks burned cherry red. “God, I never thought we would be having this conversation.”
I touched his shoulder. “We don’t have to talk about it if you’re uncomfortable. I just want to make it good for him. I’ve never had anything up there other than a finger or tongue, and I just... I know he’s been with other guys.”
“Dean.” Maverick grabbed my hands. “Don’t compare yourself to someone else.
Beau is going to go slow. He’ll make sure that it’s good for you, too.
Just because you’ve never had sex with a man before doesn’t mean he won’t make sure to take care of you.
” He tilted his head. “Have you tried touching yourself?” And now his entire face was as bright as the sun.
I snorted with laughter. “You should see yourself right now.”
“You don’t need to make fun of me.” Maverick pulled away and folded his arms over his chest. He was dressed in several layers of long-sleeved shirts with Jackson’s name and number on them. “You asked for my help, but I won’t give it if you’re going to act like this.”
“I’m sorry.” Shit, I didn’t want to piss my brother off. He still had that icy, broody look to him when he got mad. The one he had worn every day after Jackson left all those years ago but he never seemed to stop smiling. “I’ve played with myself, and Beau has, too.”
Maverick continued to glare at me. “Then why are you asking me these things?” Then his eyes went wide. “You want to have sex with Beau before you leave?”
“That was the plan, yes.”
“Oh, Dean.”
I gasped in surprise when Maverick hugged me again, his strong arms wrapped tight around my body. I smiled despite the grumpiness he had just shown me. I knew that Mav wasn’t going to change overnight, and I realized why he had gotten upset.
“I’m sorry for laughing at you. I wasn’t making fun of you. I know that you’re still trying to come to terms with your sexuality. I know it’s hard for you.”
“And I’m sorry for getting upset.” Maverick squeezed me tighter. “You love him.”
I didn’t want to admit that aloud yet. Not until I had told Beau how I felt. I had wanted to last night, but the words just got all scrambled on my tongue, and I couldn’t seem to get them out.
“Maybe.”
“Maybe, my ass.” Maverick giggled as he swatted playfully at me.
He swiped at his cheeks as he pulled away.
“You don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to, but I see you, Dean.
And if you want to make this special for the two of you before you leave, then I think you should.
It’s kind of romantic. And I did the same for Jax. ”
I stared at my brother. “You did?”
“I did, yeah, the night of his going away party.” Maverick laughed again as he flushed a deep red. “But this isn’t about me. This is about you and Beau. I’m happy for you.”
My stomach curled with excitement. “Thank you. I’m excited but nervous at the same time. Beau knows that I’m interested in trying, but we haven’t tried to have penetrative sex yet.”
“Can I ask you a question?” Maverick was watching me with curiosity.
“Of course, Mav, ask me anything.”
He smiled. “You’ve jumped into this so easily. Have you always been bisexual? Or maybe just curious?”
“Curious,” I admitted, and now it was my turn to blush. “I was never into any guys before I met Beau, but I’ve realized that I found some attractive.”
Maverick’s eyes widened. “And Killian? Did you ever think about him or maybe have a crush on him? I mean, he’s hot, so it would only be natural.”
“You think Kill is hot?”
“You don’t?”
I chuckled. “He’s my best friend and like a brother to me. I never looked at Killian like that. I’ve never touched or kissed a man until Beau. But I watched some porn. But back to you thinking Killian is hot.”
“No.” Maverick held up a hand. “We’re not going to talk about that. I think a lot of people are hot, Dean.”
I smirked. “Like who? Matty, maybe? What about Blake? Maybe another one of Jackson’s teammates? Asher’s kind of cute, but Wyatt has that whole boy-next-door thing going for him.”
“What? No! Stop it!” Maverick exclaimed.
I threw my head back as I roared with laughter. “You’re so embarrassed right now.”
“I hate you so much.” Maverick sighed. “Fine, maybe I thought Matty was cute.”
I stared at him as I tried to wrap my head around what he just said. “You did?”
“Whatever, it doesn’t matter, but please don’t tell Kill, because he will literally kill me if he knew. I think Kelly Clarkson is hot, too, and that guy from Peaky Blinders—”
“Cillian Murphy.”
Maverick stopped. “Who?”
“The guy from Peaky Blinders. His name is Cillian Murphy, which is ironic don’t you think? Didn’t we meet Kelly Clarkson at the Grammy’s the first year we won? Didn’t you try to hit on her?” I teased, and Maverick giggled. “You did!”
He rolled his eyes. “I was always going to be in love with Jackson, so it doesn’t matter. I only wanted him.”
“That is really romantic,” I told him.
Maverick shrugged. “It’s the truth.” He bumped my shoulder. “We should probably go back out to the parade. Jax said they were going to come find us when it was over, so we didn’t get lost in the crowd.” We were supposed to meet them at a designated spot at the end.
As we went back out to watch the end of the parade, I couldn’t contain my excitement and nerves over tonight.
I wanted to tell Beau how I felt, and hopefully he would tell me the same.
I would wait for him to come out, but I wanted him to know that I was serious about us.
And that I wanted him to be mine. No matter what.