52. Chapter 52
Chapter 52
Sloane
A t school the next day, I have to tell everyone about prom, all without crying. I can tell that Kurt, Billy, and Tyler feel bad for me but don't really know what to say. I'm glad for it because I don't want to talk about it anyway. I called Maggie after I pulled myself together last night, only to fall to pieces again telling her I couldn't go to prom with them. Since it's a beautiful, sunny day, we meet outside for lunch, and I get there early to pick a spot farther down the sidewalk so we can have some privacy.
When Beth and Annalise see me, it's everything I can do not to cry. They frown and alternately hug me. "We're so sorry," Beth says. "Do you want to talk about it?"
I shrug my shoulders. "There's not much to say. He told me his car has issues, and he can't come," I say despondently.
Maggie chimes in since she knows the story. "He said he can't borrow his mom's car because she needs it." She looks at me with sympathetic eyes which causes me to start crying. "Oh, I'm sorry, Sloane." She hugs me as I compose myself.
After a minute, I pull back and wipe my eyes with a napkin. "You know what's even worse?" I ask my friends as my voice cracks.
"What?" Annalise asks.
I sniffle. "Amber is going to think I really did make Ky up."
Annalise rolls her eyes and sighs. "Ugh, she's miserable. Don't worry, we'll back you up."
"Yeah," Beth adds, "you were clearly talking to him every single night on spring break." She jokes and this makes me laugh a little.
"I promise I was talking to Ky and not my mom," I joke back.
"Oh, we know," Annalise says, "we overheard a few things."
I blush. "Stupid Ky. I just feel like he didn't try hard, you know?" I look at my friends who nod. "I would get it if something major had happened, like a death in the family, but his car?"
"I can't believe he turned out to be such a jerk," Annalise says. "If anything, it sounded like he liked you more than maybe you liked him."
I inhale deeply. "That's what I thought, too. I told him that if he loved me as much as he said he did that he would find a way. I should have known when he couldn't come visit me when I was only two hours away at the beach that something was up." As I say this, something dawns on me. I look at my friends. "When we were first talking about prom, he asked if we should get a hotel room downtown. I told him I wasn't ready for that."
"What did he say?" Beth asks.
"He asked if I'd ever be ready for that and when I told him, of course, he asked if I'd ever be ready for that with him." I search their eyes for their reaction.
All three sets of eyes go wide. "What did you say?" Annalise asks.
"I told him I just wasn't ready now. He knew that. I was up front about that all this time," I explain.
"Well, if that's the reason why he stood you up ten days before prom, then he doesn't deserve you," Annalise says as anger surrounds her words.
Beth nods. "She's right." She thinks for a moment, then says, "Did you have that conversation before spring break?"
I turn my eyes skyward as I think back, then nod. "I think so." My shoulders slouch, and I let out a sigh. "How could I be so stupid?" I feel tears stinging behind my eyes.
Maggie looks at me with uncertainty in her eyes. "Are you going to ask him about it, or just go your separate ways?"
"I don't know," I say. "I want to believe his excuse, but the fact that he just didn't seem to try to find a way really hurts. It was just like, 'Sorry, I just can't make it,' like it wasn't a big deal." I think for a moment as I pick up a stray piece of pine straw off the sidewalk. I look at my friend. "I bet it was because he wanted what I wasn't ready to give him." Everyone is quiet, and I think about it, then sigh again. "You know what? I don't care. He's shown his true colors and if he can't respect me and what I'm comfortable with, he doesn't deserve me."
"Damn straight," Annalise gives me an encouraging smile.
"My dad told me that when God closes a door, He opens a window." I fidget with the pine straw, wrapping it around my index finger. "I don't know what could make this situation better, but maybe it's my sign that Ky isn't right for me." I'm trying so hard to be positive.
"I just wish he hadn't messed up your prom plans," Beth says. "He should have told you sooner if it's not about the car."
“Yeah,” Maggie says, “he should have given you the chance to go with someone else instead of telling you right before prom.”
I sigh. "At least I have The Lemonheads concert that day. I'll see if Tameka can come into town and go with me. That'll take my mind off the fact that I will have gone through middle school and high school without ever going to a dance." My shoulders slump, and I feel like the biggest loser. What little optimism I had has faded. I'm the loser who won't even get to go to her senior prom. Pity party, party of one…