Chapter 30
THANE
T he wyvern fights lasted well into nightfall.
Leif and Fennan both had more to drink than they should have, and went to stew in their rooms while Ronan and Piper went for a stroll on the royal grounds.
Why her relationship bothered them more this time than the last was a mystery.
Maybe now they believed it was a real possibility Piper could leave, before that wasn’t even a thought in anyone’s mind.
Queen Nyrovia retired early from the fights but promised Thane an audience with her husband the following day.
“So, what did you think of the event?” Thane walked Katana to the guest wing and stopped at the door next to his where she would be staying. He wanted her close, not for any reason other than to make sure she was safe, he told himself. It was in case Atlanta showed up.
Lifting a shoulder, her brows rose. “It was interesting. I hate to admit it but the more fights I watched, the more I could not look away. Not that I enjoyed it. I detest violence, especially with animals.”
Thane rubbed the back of his neck. She would detest him if she hated violence. “Well, um… sleep well, Katana.” He groaned. “I said ‘well’ twice.”
“Three times now,” she teased.
He half smiled. “Yeah. Goodnight. If you need anything, I’ll be right here.”
Still facing him, she reached back, opened the door and stepped onto the threshold and… waited. “Goodnight, Thane.”
His eyes fell to her lips and the sudden urge to kiss her was like a burning fire. “Katana,” he breathed, leaning forward and gripping each side of the doorframe.
It was lust, pure lust, and had absolutely nothing to do with love. He didn’t want love, but he wanted her. The intensity of the feeling sent his pulse racing. The breeze from the open window in her room trickled through the doorway, swirling with her scent all around him.
Her bright lavender eyes locked onto his and she took a small step inside the room, then another.
“Yes, Thane?”
As if he had no control, he found himself following her inside. “I—should let you get some sleep.”
“I am not tired. You can stay for a while, if you would like. We can… talk.” The lit candelabra on the bedside table was the only light in the room. The amber glow somehow enhanced her curves. The V-cut of her silk neckline showed off the roundness of her breasts.
“Yes, talk,” he whispered, eyes traveling to the large four-poster bed. He hurried to the only chair in the room and gripped the armrests.
Facing him, Katana leaned her back against the bedpost with one leg extended forward.
It opened the slit in her dress to her upper thigh, almost where it creased at her hip.
He didn’t remember it being that high before.
While watching him, she slowly began unwinding the small plaits in her braided hair.
A few of the flowers she’d weaved in fell to the floor.
Her fingers ran through her loose locks with a coy smile.
Gods, he felt like he was going to catch fire at any moment. “Do you really think we have a chance?”
Thane gulped. “A chance?” Them? In a romantic way?
He hadn’t thought past wanting to bed her, past the sounds she would make with him inside her or the way he’d make her moan in ecstasy.
He didn’t want to think past that. Thinking about giving his heart away again made him want to vomit.
Especially to her. He shouldn’t want her at all.
He promised Valeen he wouldn’t hurt her, she was too good for him to do that, and right now, he couldn’t give her all of him.
“At convincing the dragons to join us. Even Ronan seems reluctant.”
“Oh, right, the dragons.” Thane took a deep breath. “I must convince them. I won’t leave until I do.”
“You do seem like the type to get what he wants.”
“Usually.”
She smiled and laid herself across the bed, propping herself up on her side. The position of her thighs, one crossed over the other, hiked her dress up even higher, exposing the side of her ass. Just like he thought, she had no underwear on. Shit .
Thane tore his gaze away, trying to find something else to focus on, but then he drifted right back to her. “Do you need a drink or anything?” He might have to get out of this room to catch some cool air. “Water perhaps?” He needed water, splashed in his face.
She propped herself up on her hand and draped the other over her waist. The V in her dress fell more to one side, and he was sure if she shifted a little, her nipple would show. She didn’t seem to notice or care. “No, but thank you. Unless you do.”
What was it about her he was so drawn to? “No.”
“If you could be any other race, what would it be?” Katana asked. She always said things he wasn’t expecting.
“I’ve never thought about it before.”
“Well, think about it now.” She flashed him a bright smile and with that he’d probably give her any answer she wanted.
“A dragon.”
“Why?”
“They’re ferocious. Good hunters. The second most lethal race in the realms.”
She giggled. “I should have guessed that since you are the god of war. I think I would be a forest nymph.”
“Why is that?” They were said to be gorgeous maidens, rarely sighted by men but could capture their hearts with nothing more than a look. She may very well be one already.
“So I could wander the woods singing and collecting flowers, and I would be beautiful of course.”
“You’re already very beautiful,” he countered. “More so than any nymph.”
“Have you ever seen one?”
“Once, long ago.”
“But I could turn into a tree if a random male wanted to hunt me. I would never be found if I did not want to be. They are mysterious, and I should like to be that.”
He’d never met anyone like Katana before. Even after being abused and traumatized, she was still bright—it was cliché to say it, but she reminded him of the sun. He was so used to death, violence and war, as was everyone around him, but she hadn’t been tarnished by it. “I think you’re mysterious.”
“Do you?” Her lavender eyes sparkled.
“Yes. I can’t understand how you are so—happy. You haven’t let what happened change you for the worse.”
“I will not lie and say there were not periods of my life that were gloomy and dark, or that I do not still struggle at times. You have seen me struggle, but one thing about the sun, Thane, is that it always rises.”
The weight of the silence that followed and her stare made Thane’s body buzz even more.
He gripped the chair harder as if it was the anchor holding him down.
He was a rock. He had immeasurable control.
He’d resisted every single maiden who’d thrown themselves at him and even waited months for Layala to give into him.
He could resist her. But gods above, it was like she was pulling him in with a chain, a hot chain that would not break.
“Can I ask you something personal?” Katana licked her bottom lip.
“Yes.”
“Does it still hurt?”
He knew exactly what she was asking. “Yes, but not as much as it did a few months ago. Can I ask you something?”
“It is only fair.” She brushed her bright hair behind her shoulder and slowly ran her fingertips over her collarbone. Did she have any idea that her touch drew his attention there? Did she have any idea he was on the verge of igniting, and she was ten feet away?
“What are you thinking about?” he asked.
“I was thinking that I like the way you are looking at me right now.”
He nearly choked on the saliva he swallowed down and swore under his breath.
She giggled, throwing herself back on the bed. She stared up at the ceiling for a moment then turned her head. “And I was thinking that maybe you do not simply want to just look.”
Heat flooded his body, and he pressed himself harder into the seat cushion. “What are we doing, Katana? What are you doing?”
She sat up, dangling her feet off the bed. “I am not sure what you mean?” The bottom lip tucked between her teeth told him she knew exactly what he meant.
“Yes, you do.”
She smiled again. “I call it flirting.”
“You said you hadn’t been pleased by a male in too long.” He finally let go of the armrests and stood. One foot slowly stepped in front of the other. “Is that something you want or was that flirting ?”
The room seemed to feel heavier, coated with desire. She looked down and gripped the bedding on either side of her hips. “A little of both. But I do not think your heart is ready.”
“No,” he said, putting his fingers under her chin and lifting her face. “But it doesn’t need to be. What happens in this room tonight can end here. It doesn’t need to have anything to do with our hearts.”
Her breathing quickened. “And tomorrow night?”
“We can worry about tomorrow night, tomorrow.” He’d pushed Layala away when she wanted him because he loved her. He wanted to make certain she knew exactly who she was choosing. This was different. It had nothing to do with love. Anything else would be complicated and he didn’t want that.
“I think we should take some time to mull this… arrangement over first. And if you feel the same way in the morning light, then…”
“You’re the only thing I’ve thought about for days,” he whispered. “It won’t go away in the morning.”
She blew out a breath. “Can I tell you the truth?”
His hands were trembling now. He had to know what her lips tasted like. “I only ever want the truth.”
As she searched his face, her lavender eyes glittered in the candlelight. “You might be able to keep your heart out of it, Thane, but I do not know if I can with mine.”
He smiled both relieved and disappointed. “Then I guess I’ll say goodnight, once again. Sleep well.” He quickly made his way into his own bedroom. Katana deserved someone who could give her more than he could now. She was already fragile, and he wouldn’t break her further.
Thane woke up in a sweat, even his hair was dampened by it. Screaming. Someone was screaming. He threw his blankets aside and sprinted out of the room. Frozen in the hallway, he tried to figure out where the scream came from.
A chill ran down his back.
Katana.
He quickly pushed down the handle, locked.
Her screaming stopped and the silence that followed made his stomach drop.
He rammed his shoulder into the door, snapping the wood frame and shoved through.
The room was dark except for the meager light coming in through the window.
It was enough to know the bed was empty.
“Katana?” he panted.
A small whimper made him turn. In the corner of the room, he found her curled into herself, crying. He didn’t smell blood, didn’t see any sign of a struggle. He dropped into a crouch beside her and gently touched her bare shoulder.
“Please do not hurt me.” She kept her face buried into her bent knees with her arms circled around her head. “Please.”
“Katana,” he said softly. “It’s Thane. Was there someone here?”
“I did not do anything wrong.”
He carefully pulled one of her arms away from her face, then the other.
She turned her face away, and angry heat flooded his chest. This wasn’t because of someone hurting her now.
She was having another battle with the past. Either it was Synick or Atlanta that had made her this way and he wanted to kill both of them for it.
“Katana, I won’t hurt you.”
She shook her head and wrapped her arms around herself again. “I did not even look at him, Atlanta. I promise.” She turned to angle her back toward him. Her body shook with sobs, and he was almost sure she wasn’t fully awake. “You are scaring them! Stop!”
Thane gritted his teeth. Oh, he was going to kill him. He swore it. He’d convince Valeen to give him Soulender just for a day.
“No! I do not want to die.”
He gripped her shoulder and turned her. “Katana.” She shielded her face, and he gently pushed her hands down. “Open your eyes. Look at me. It’s me, Thane. Thane, the Elf King, the god of war. I am not Atlanta. You’re safe. No one will hurt you.”
A moment later, she lifted her chin and her eyes fluttered open.
Her breathing was still entirely too fast, and she looked bewildered.
“Thane?” she reached forward and cupped his cheeks.
“Thane,” she breathed. Then she pressed her hand over her stomach.
She brought her palm up in front of her as if she expected to find something there.
After blinking a few times, she dropped her hands as if reality rushed in.
She pushed herself up and leaned back against the wall. “What are you doing in here?”
“You were screaming.”
Her mouth fell open, mortified. “I was?”
“Yes.”
Piper peeked in the door, as did Leif and Fennen. Thane quickly waved them off.
“I am sorry.” She pushed her hands into her hair and then sank down the wall onto the floor again. “I did not mean to wake you.” She forced a smile. “It was a nightmare. You can go back to your room.”
He dropped down in front of her once more. “I’m not leaving you like this. Do you want to tell me about it?”
A tear slid down her cheek and her smile faltered. “Please go. I do not want you to see me like this.”
He shook his head.
She choked out a sob and pressed her face into her hands. “Thane, please leave me be. My issues are not yours. You do not want to get involved, remember?”
As if her pain seeped into him, his chest started to ache.
“Come here.” He took her arms and wrapped them around his neck, then picked her up, cradling both her legs to one side.
Curling around him, she buried her face into the nape of his neck and quietly sobbed.
He carried her over to her bed and climbed on, sitting against the stack of pillows with her on his lap.
He stroked her hair and kept his other arm wrapped around her lower back. “Will you tell me about it?”
She sniffled and he felt the wetness of her tears against the skin on his neck. “It is silly. It is not even real.”
“It’s not silly if it does this.”
“I dreamed Atlanta would not stop hitting me. The children were crying…” she sniffled again and went quiet.
“Did that happen?”
She nodded. “And then he stabbed me, and blood was pouring down my body. That did not happen.”
“It did. He was just not the one who did it.” Thane held her a little tighter. If he could take her pain and anguish away, he would.
“Yes.” She paused, then whispered, “Thank you.” They fell into a comfortable silence until her steady breathing told him she was asleep. But he didn’t push her off his chest, didn’t let go. He held her until the sun rose and peeked through the windows.
With the birds singing outside she lifted her head and smiled with sleepy eyes. Even with messy hair she was radiant. “Good morning.”
He smiled back. “Hi.”
So much for not getting his heart involved.