Chapter 16 River Wild
river wild
DUKE
I spent the better part of yesterday avoiding the lodge and burying myself in ranch repairs.
Every time I see Roxanne, something inside me shifts and not in a fun, flirty way either—more like tectonic plates grinding together deep in my chest.
She’s intense, beautiful, and stubborn. I keep telling myself I don’t like her, but the truth is, she’s all I’ve been thinking about.
That kiss still plays on a loop in my head when I close my eyes at night.
The feel of her mouth, the flash in her blue eyes right before she pressed her lips to mine, and the way she released me like it didn’t shake her to her core.
She’s not the first beautiful woman to visit the ranch, but she’s the first one ever to completely undo me with a look.
I should stay as far away from Roxanne Denning as possible and yet, I’m standing outside the lodge waiting for Trouble to appear in something she shouldn’t be wearing on the water, and my heart is bucking like a bull in my chest.
Earlier, Topper and I loaded my F-150 with the gear we would need for the trip so Georgia and Rusty could drive to the launch site to stage everything. Topper and I will drive Roxanne, Leo, and Allie to meet them.
Rusty made sure to tell me it was a horrible idea before slamming the truck door. Then he drove off while Georgia waved from the passenger seat.
I kick at a divot in the stone steps leading up to the lodge, making a mental note to add that to my running repair list. When I finally glance up, Topper’s arms are crossed over his chest as he stares at me.
When you’ve been through as much as I’ve been through with a man like Wyatt “Topper” Westin, you know what he’s thinking without him saying a word.
He saved my life on a mission that went sideways when we were a couple of green Army Rangers trying to prove ourselves. We’ve been inseparable ever since. He’s the brother I wish Charlie was to me, and by the expression hanging on his face now, Topper is wondering what the hell is wrong with me.
“Nothing is wrong with me,” I say, grabbing the water bottle I had already stowed in his Jeep.
Topper’s eyebrows arch. “I didn’t say anything.”
“But that’s what you were thinking.”
“True,” he says with a shrug. “While we’re on the subject, what the hell is wrong with you?”
I don’t want to tell him how the incessant thoughts of Roxanne have set up camp in my brain. Topper already knows.
“How are you going to get through the summer if Roxanne has gotten you this shaken up already?”
“We both agreed to keep things professional, which is exactly what I plan on doing.”
“Right … professional.”
“Hey, I thought you’d be proud of me that I didn’t disrupt dinner or s’mores last night.”
“I was proud of you, but I think Roxanne was disappointed you didn’t come to heckle us.”
My heart suddenly lodges in my throat. “How do you mean?”
“It was like she kept looking for you, and she seemed disappointed when you didn’t show.”
A grin spreads rapidly across my face. “Really?”
“Damn, I shouldn’t have told you that.”
“How, how could you tell she was looking for me?”
“I’m not saying another word.”
I chuckle as the familiar call of Allie gets our attention. She is practically skipping toward us while Leo follows with his citified swagger. My heart sinks seeing Roxanne isn’t with them, and I suck in a breath so my disappointment isn’t as obvious.
“Ready?” Topper asks, putting his arm around Allie and pulling her to him for a quick squeeze.
“Abso-freaking-lutely,” she says.
“Is this our chariot?” Leo asks.
“Yes, sir,” Topper says, opening the rear passenger door.
“Roxanne … is she?” I ask.
Allie hangs her head before getting in the Jeep. “Oh, she’s—”
“Here,” a breathless voice says. “I’m here.”
Roxanne trots out of the lobby and throws herself into the Jeep. My mouth quirks up as I close the door. Though what she is wearing could get her into trouble, I’m happy she decided to join. Now, I have to concentrate on keeping her safe.
Topper takes the wheel, and I turn in my seat.
“Everyone ready?” Really my question was directed at Roxanne, who is sitting in the middle seat and is pale as the snow on Granite Peak.
Allie and Leo have a relaxed posture while Roxanne keeps her gaze fixed on her clenched hands.
I turn around and want to punch myself in the gut.
I should never have challenged her to do this so soon.
She’s not dressed for this and she’s practically shaking like a leaf.
Maybe I can convince her to stay behind with Georgia on the shore.
The Jeep rattles and bumps along the gravel road, pine trees zipping past in a blur of deep green and sun-dappled light.
“We’ll be there in about twenty minutes,” I call over my shoulder. Roxanne’s arms are folded tight, her jaw clenched while she tries to act like the bouncing doesn’t bother her.
I nudge Topper, then motion with my head to the backseat. He picks up the cue.
“Remember that time you wired the chow tent for karaoke at FOB Logan?” I ask Topper. “You really enhanced our dining experience with it.”
“FOB?” Allie asks.
“Forward Operating Base,” Topper explains. “Basically a makeshift camp in the middle of nowhere. And I enhanced morale.”
“You patched a comms mic into a busted speaker system and forced half the platoon to listen to your rendition of Mamma Mia.”
Leo leans forward, eyes wide. “This actually happened?”
“It was 180 degrees, and we were stuck waiting for the next op window,” Topper says. “I had to do something to create a positive distraction.”
“You blasted Whitney Houston’s ‘I Wanna Dance with Somebody’ through the loudspeakers and somehow had a choreographed dance to go with it.”
“I had skills,” Topper says with a proud nod.
“Skills my ass,” I shoot back. “He made everyone pick a song. Some poor guy sang ‘More Than a Woman’ in between bites of rubbery meatloaf.”
“I stand by my choices,” Topper says. “Our CO was not impressed though.”
“He tried to court-martial him on the grounds of being too enthusiastic.”
That gets a laugh out of Allie and Leo. Roxanne glances at me out of the corner of her eye, lips tight, but her hands are more relaxed.
“And for the record,” I add, “I can’t carry a tune to save my damn life.”
“That’s a lie,” Topper says. “You should’ve heard Duke belting out ‘Total Eclipse of the Heart.’ The man was born for the stage.”
“I’m dying,” Allie says. “I need to see this. Please tell me there’s a karaoke night at the ranch?”
“Every other Saturday,” Topper says.
“Oh, this keeps getting better and better,” Allie says, clapping her hands together.
Topper and I keep the conversation going by recounting a few more of the pranks we’ve pulled on each other. Roxanne still isn’t saying much by the time we pull off the road even though she looks more relaxed.
Georgia waves to us when we pull into the launch site.
Rusty is leaning up against the truck drinking out of his thermos cup.
The Arkansas river churns beside us, steady and relentless.
It’s not even class five water today, should be smooth, but something about the energy in the air feels …
tight. I shake it off and line up our guests so we can run through the safety protocols while Georgia and Topper help get everyone fitted with a helmet and vest.
Topper and I get the medium-sized raft ready at the launch point while Georgia instructs everyone on what to do if they fall in. Roxanne is still fiddling with her helmet and trying to take deep breaths.
“You okay?” I ask. “You’re usually quicker with a snarky remark when I’m around. I’m feeling a little let down.”
“I’m fine.”
Those words again. I’m fine can sometimes be the most dangerous phrase in the English language.
“Uh-huh,” I murmur. I take the helmet back from her gently, noting how her fingers brush mine for a second too long. “Let me help.”
She sighs, like I’m the biggest irritation on this side of the Rockies, but she tips her chin up, letting me fit the helmet to her head. My fingers skim her temples as I adjust the strap beneath her jaw. Something in me heats and it’s not from the sun pouring through the forest.
“You’re safe,” I say, my voice quieter now. “I’ve done this a hundred times, and Topper is one of the best guides around.”
“Shit, Duke,” Georgia says, checking her watch. “It’s not even noon and you’re already telling tall tales.”
“He ain’t lyin’,” Topper interjects. “I am the best.”
“Because I trained you,” Georgia says. She then turns to Roxanne. “I decided to sit this one out and see how the boys do on their own for once.”
“You’re not going with us?” Roxanne asks, her voice quivering.
“Not this time,” Georgia replies, spraying herself with sunscreen. “Going to drive along to monitor safety from the riverbank, then I’ll be ready with beers and snacks when y’all are through.”
“Oh,” Roxanne says.
“We better git to it,” Topper says.
“Yes! I’m so excited!” Allie chimes.
We take our places in the raft. Leo insists on being in front once Rusty says that’s the most splash prone position. Allie and Roxanne take the middle, with Topper and I steering and shouting commands from the back. Sitting behind Roxanne will also allow me to keep my eyes on her at all times.
“Have fun!” Georgia shouts as we push off.
At first, the water feels good and smooth as we glide gently.
The river’s a hell of a thing, though. It’ll lull you into submission with sunlight skipping off the surface and the kind of soft current that makes you think it’s on your side.
The quiet stretch we’re gliding through now, before the next rapid, is pretty.
Almost.
Topper calls out “rest,” and everyone lifts their paddles. The raft slows to a lazy float, and Allie, who has a Go-Pro attached to her helmet, takes video of the tree-lined cliffs.
Roxanne is right in front of me, in the middle seat, half-turned toward Leo, her shoulders more relaxed than I’ve seen all day.
Her hair’s tied back, but a few wet strands cling to her cheek.
She laughs when Leo and Allie crack jokes.
Damn, if it doesn’t hit me hard how good she looks when she’s not carrying the weight of the world on her shoulders.
For a second, I let myself enjoy it too.
Sun overhead, water gliding under us, a strange peace settles in my chest. I’m quickly reminded that peace never lasts long on the river.
I hear the low growl of white water ahead, and then Topper’s voice cuts the air like a whip.
“Paddles ready! Left side, lean in!”
And just like that, the river stops pretending to be gentle.