Chapter 43 Not Right for the Role
not right for the role
DUKE
Hollywood.
You can keep it.
The weather’s okay, the palm trees are nice, but the entire town makes me feel like I’m in The Truman Show. Everything seems a little too rehearsed and a little too plastic.
I hate it.
As we’re driving to yet another party, we turn onto Hollywood Blvd. The only thing I can think of is all the countless hopefuls who got off a bus here and then realized they were stepping out onto the boulevard of broken dreams.
I will say that Charlie has definitely shown me that he wants to help. In the past couple of days, he’s introduced me to several people who have genuinely expressed interest in the ranch. There’s been some promising leads, but so far, no one willing to really commit to partnering with us.
Roxanne and I have only connected once since I’ve been here.
She called me the other night, but I was in a nightclub and didn’t hear the phone.
When I called her back the next day, she was interviewing Millie and Stedman after a bulldogging demo.
We’ve texted each other good night and sent emojis in the mornings, but it’s not the same. I can’t wait to get home.
The feeling only gets worse after tonight’s dinner at Jolene Fox’s mansion.
What was supposed to be a conversation about funding turned into something else entirely—something I don’t ever want to relive.
Charlie’s just as rattled on the drive home, and neither of us says much.
Back at the house, I try to head upstairs, but he stops me.
“Grab two beers from the fridge and I’ll meet you on the patio.”
“I’m tired,” I protest.
“Just have one beer with me.”
I roll my eyes but do what he says. The cool breeze floating by helps to blow off the last bits of frustrated steam coming off me.
I set Charlie’s beer down on the patio table and take a swig of mine as I unbutton some of my shirt.
The city stretches forever beneath me. It’s all gold and glitter.
Spotlights sweep the sky over some premiere while traffic weaves like blood through arteries.
Charlie finally joins me. “Sorry, man. Shit, what a night, huh?” I turn and lean against the deck railing. “Swear to me you didn’t set that up.”
“Fuck off.” He takes a long pull of his beer. “Of course not. Swear you weren’t about to pounce on that minx?”
“I think you know the answer.”
He sinks into a chair, elbows on his knees. “You scared the hell out of me back there. For a second, I thought I was about to catch my brother en flagrante with Jolene.” He shudders. “I nearly had a heart attack right there by the pool—and I’m too young for that kind of trauma.”
I huff out a laugh. “I know my heart stopped when her dress hit the pool deck.”
Charlie shoots me a grin—the boyish one I haven’t seen in years. “Glad you proved me wrong. Most guys in this town would’ve caved.”
“Not my style.”
He raises his bottle in a mock toast. “Guess some things don’t change. You were the only one I knew who could walk past a plate of Mom’s cookies without sneaking one.”
I smile, walk over, and clink my bottle against his. “That’s because I knew you’d steal enough for both of us.”
The laugh we share lands easy, familiar. I admit to myself that maybe this trip has done what I never expected—it’s helped me restore a little faith in my brother.
“I knew you were strong, but I think this is more about Roxanne than anything. You miss her, don’t you?”
“Yep. I was hoping to get on a flight home tonight, actually. Think you can make it happen?”
Charlie checks his watch. “Uh, I can’t arrange one this late, but I can get you out first thing in the morning.”
“Fine.”
“Good, that means I have more time with you. Tell me about Roxanne.”
“What?”
“You know. The woman you’re crushing on and the main reason why you didn’t want to jump that Fox tonight.”
“There are many reasons I wasn’t interested in Jolene, but yes, Roxanne being the main one.”
“So spill it. I want to know about her.”
I shrug, take a sip of beer, and then start filling Charlie in about Roxanne, what it was like when she first arrived, our camping trip, the feeling I get every time I see her. After I finish, Charlie sits with his feet up on the edge of his fire pit, nodding slowly.
“I’ve never heard you talk like this before about anyone. I knew it, man. I knew it the moment I saw you two. Damn. I wish I could find that.”
“It’s going to be tough in a town full of Jolenes,” I say.
“Tell me about it. I’m happy for you, though.”
“Thanks,” I say, standing up and stretching. “I think I’ve had enough excitement for one evening.”
“Me too, but hey, I wanted to give you this,” Charlie says, rising and fishing something out of his pocket. He hands me a piece of paper.
I unfold it, and the numbers blur for a second. When they come into focus, my knees nearly give out. “Charlie … this is a check for a million dollars.”
“Congrats, you can read,” he says, slapping me on the back. “I told you I wanted to help. I’ll send more in about a month.”
I’m so overwhelmed by how much this will help that I throw my arms around my brother and hug him. “Thank you.”
“Yeah, hey, no problem. I’ve got a lot to make up for. This is at least a small first step.”
“Thanks. Mom and Dad will be proud of you.”
“Finally! Get some sleep, yeah?” Charlie says, yawning as we head in.
“I will.” I hustle up the steps because I can’t get to my phone fast enough to call Roxanne. I check my watch. It’s 10:47 p.m. there, I might be waking her up, but even leaving a message will make me feel better.
My body flutters when I hear her sleepy voice say, “Hi.”
“Roxanne?”
She perks up. “Yes? Are you okay?”
“I am now, just needed to hear your voice,” I breathe.
“Did you have another nightmare?”
“Sort of, but I wasn’t asleep.”
“Oh?”
“I’m … I’m coming home tomorrow. I can’t take much more of the smog in the air and the pretense on the people.”
“I get that. What happened tonight? You sound really shaken up.”
“Some bored millionaire’s wife thought I might be interested in having a roll in the hay with her in exchange for funding for the ranch.”
There’s a clatter, like she fumbled the phone. My chest lurches. “Roxanne? You okay?”
“Yes—sorry, just dropped the phone.” Her voice sounds higher, strained. “So … were you interested in that?”
I cringe just thinking about it. “Hell no. Found the entire exchange pretty insulting. Talk about a desperate housewife.”
“Seriously, I feel sorry for her husband.”
“I know. How’s it going there?”
“Really well. I made some progress with Goose, and Rusty showed me how to shear a sheep yesterday. It’s supposed to be a bad storm tomorrow night, though. I’m hoping you make it home before then.”
“The storm won’t stop me. I’ll drive if I have to.”
“It’s been that bad?”
“Yes, being away from you has been that bad.”
She goes silent on the other end, and I might have said too much, but after the night I’ve had, I don’t give a damn.
She sighs before she speaks. “Duke … I …” she pauses again. I feel like she wants to ask me something.
“Yes?” I insist.
“I really miss you. Um, Jameson and I, we miss you.”
“I miss you too.”
For me it’s more than missing, though, it’s aching. I want to tell her I love her but for some reason, those words never come tonight.