Chapter 20
TWENTY
I was starting to spiral.
Not out of control. This was a tighter and tighter spiral, like I was whipping around in a tornado, heading toward the point of touchdown. And I knew exactly what was there: Grant.
The follow-up to my date night with Leo had given increased momentum to the tornado. It had me whipping around and around in a terrifying way. And the knowledge of the destruction I’d experience if I continued on my path? It would make Mentos and Pepsi look like a glass of spilled water.
One thing could help me get back on track: a Saturday in the office. Without Grant.
I set the brown paper bag on my desk—Grant had insisted on sending me home with the maple bars when he’d dropped me off last night—then took my seat and got straight to work.
I had a dozen emails in my inbox and five tasks on my to-do list, which meant plenty of focused work. That was where my brain thrived.
Usually.
My eyes kept flicking to the donut bag. I was hungry, but this was more than that.
I’d brought the donuts so they wouldn’t go to waste, but now they were in direct conflict with my plan for the day: think about anything other than Grant.
Every time I saw them or smelled them, I heard what he’d said last night about a love for maple bars being the foundation of any successful relationship.
Add in his comment about not putting any stock in the 12% Matchify score and the new question that had been zooming around my brain like a pesky fly: who had Grant matched with, and did he plan to go out with those matches?
I could see him waving them off with his cynicism.
But I could also see him feeling himself bound to follow up as “research.”
Gosh, I hated research.
My hold on myself was circling the drain.
Every time I looked away from my computer screen, my gaze would slip to the donuts, then to the silent Truth Machine and Grant’s vacant seat.
My brain had no trouble at all filling that space with an image of him leaning back, his hands clasped behind his head as he looked over what he’d just typed.
Gritting my teeth, I forced my focus back to an email from Nick.
I managed to get through over half of my emails before I snapped. I stood up, grabbed the donut bag, and dangled them over the garbage can like the Ring of Power over the Cracks of Doom.
But throwing away perfectly good maple bars felt like an unpardonable crime.
I grasped the folded bag top more tightly, then reached for my purse, and headed out of the office.
I gifted the bag of donuts to a homeless man on the corner and headed to Dawson’s.
Maple bars had become far too influential in my life.
I probably didn’t even like them that much compared to all the other neglected donut varieties.
Maybe I was a pink sprinkles person. Or an emerging apple fritter lover.
I wrinkled my nose, but hey, it was possible.
The thing to do was buy one of every donut Dawson’s offered. Then I could make a systematic review of the options, examine the data, and figure out which one I actually liked most. If I really wanted to make this reliable, I could even blindfold myself.
That was normal, right? A blindfolded, self-administered donut taste test?
When I reached Dawson’s, I grabbed the door handle, then went still.
Behind the counter was a young woman I recognized as Mr. Dawson’s niece, Jill. She came to visit every now and then and helped in the shop. She was young, pretty, and smiley. Just now, she was laughing as she looked at the customer across the counter.
That customer was Grant.
My heart clenched, and my grip on the door handle loosened.
The feeling in the pit of my stomach was ridiculous. Did I have some claim on Grant’s smile? On the contractions of the muscles in his face?
Of course not.
I opened the door.
“If I told you our maple bar secrets,” said Jill, “I’d have to kill you. And that would be a shame.”
“Not for my wallet, it wouldn’t be,” Grant replied, handing her his credit card.
“How about this?” She swiped it and handed it right back. “I’ll bring you a free bar tonight. That sound okay?”
My gaze sharpened. Tonight?
“More than okay,” he replied. “Does seven-thirty work?”
Jill looked at him in a way that made my stomach turn. “Perfect. See you then.”
Feeling like I might throw up even without a donut taste test, I turned to head out of the shop before either of them noticed me. Whether Grant planned to go out with his highest Matchify matches or not, he was clearly going out with women.
“Vivian!” Jill said in a bright, welcoming voice. “I’ve been hoping to see you.”
Grant’s head whipped around.
I didn’t meet his eye but forced a smile at her. “Good to see you, Jill.”
“You here for maple bars too?” she asked knowingly. “This man just took the last one.”
“I’m not here for maple bars,” I said, remembering the point of coming here. “I was hoping for an assorted dozen, actually.”
Her brows went up. “Branching out, are we? I sold the last of the apple fritters and blueberry glazed a few minutes ago, but I can grab fresh ones in the back. Just a second.” She waved at Grant, then slipped through the door and out of sight.
I fought the nausea in my stomach and turned to Grant. “Testing your maple bar dating theory?”
His expression was unreadable as he met my gaze. “Just had a craving.” He lifted the single maple bar he held.
“Interesting euphemism,” I teased. I would get through this interaction with my pride intact if I had to stuff two dozen stale apple fritters down my gullet. “Does this mean I get to come observe your date with Jill?”
“Do you want to?”
In a way, I’d never wanted anything more, but I also wasn’t a glutton for punishment or a masochist. It was totally understandable that Grant was asking Jill out. He and I were incompatible. He claimed not to put much stock in the data, but inside, he felt it.
“It only seems fair, right?” I said. “Fortunately for you, I’ve got too much work on my plate to take the evening off, so I’ll just have to wait for the second date.”
Jill reappeared with one tray of apple fritters and one of glazed blueberry donuts. When she noticed Grant still there, a look of slight surprise crossed her face. “Did I forget to give you back your card?”
He looked at me for a second before turning to her. “Nope.”
“Good. See you later?”
Grant nodded. “See you later. Bye, Vivian.”
An overbright smile on my face, I waved and turned to Jill, who was putting together my assorted dozen, though her eyes were on the door as it shut.
“You two know each other?” she asked.
“We’ve been working together. Temporarily.”
“Oh! Small world.”
She didn’t realize that the only reason she knew Grant was because I’d brought him here.
“Is he as nice as he seems?” The suggestive brow raise that accompanied the words made me want to take a hammer and tap it back into place. “We’re supposed to go out tonight, but it’d be nice to get the inside scoop from someone who’s known him longer than five minutes.”
The green monster inside wanted to tell her Grant was an awful person and she’d have a miserable night with him. That he’d take her apart question by innocuous question, then leave her like an unfinished puzzle.
“He’s great,” I said. “You’ll have a good time.”
She sighed in relief. “Thank you for the reassurance.” She closed up the box. “You sure you don’t want a maple bar with these?”
“I’m positive.” I put out my hand for the box.
I was about to become an apple fritter fanatic.