Chapter 10
Spending time with Chase has been a breath of fresh air, a book I never want to end.
My mantra to keep my mother’s voice from reaching me still appears to be working. So far she hasn’t managed to infiltrate my thoughts since meeting Chase, and I want to keep it that way.
Desperately.
But I know I need to be on high alert.
The chalet’s location comes into view as we round a corner on the street.
It’s a brand-new place that opened earlier this week, built by a group of college friends.
The decor is simple yet elegant, all natural wood and cozy nicknacks.
It’s giving mountain retreat vibes; the kind of place you’d take a ski lift to get to.
It’s in a big area away from everything else but close enough to see what’s around. I’d love to see it during the night.
The four of us are shown to our seats by a waitress. Wicker baskets filled to the brim with bread sit at the center of the table, and water glasses are already filled and waiting for us.
I notice a group of guys who I’m guessing are the owners of this gorgeous joint, are split off and shaking hands with guests.
One of them turns in our direction, and his gaze catches on me. He holds it a beat too long before looking away, the corner of his mouth twitching slightly.
“Hey there, I’m Matt. Part owner of Napkin Scribbles. Just want to say thank you on behalf of myself and the boys for choosing us to host you this afternoon. It—holy shit balls—you’re Chase Harper,” he blurts.
Chase stretches his hand out as if this is no big deal.
“Nice to meet you, man. This is an amazing establishment.”
“I can’t believe a Tornado is sitting at Napkin Scribbles.” Matt gloats proudly.
Chase chuckles. “You’re a fan then?”
“Oh, the biggest.”
Matt turns to me. “I was hoping this would be one of those once in a million, lucky situations where you’re just a group of friends, and I could shoot my shot and get your number. But, um…” he gestures at Chase, “even my restaurant can’t compete with that.”
I choke on my water.
“Your boyfriend’s pretty great. You’re a lucky lady,” Matt adds.
Bella, Brodie, and Chase all chime in collectively.
“Oh, yeah, she’s really lucky.”
“Super-duper lucky.”
“The luckiest.”
I chug most of my water as Matt walks away, hoping the cool liquid will stop the rush of blood to my face. When Chase nudges my knee with his, I already know it’s too late.
Fantastic.
“So, Little Silver,” Brodie says, tearing a piece of sourdough bread from the basket in half. “How’s the job hunt going?”
“It’s going,” I say, as I swirl my piece of bread into rosemary oil.
“Do you have any other interviews lined up?” Chase asks.
“I had an informal meeting with Ink and Print earlier today,” I explain. “It’s a bit of a process. If I impress them, the team will give me a small project to complete, and then I’ll have to present it to them before going through a formal interview.”
“That’s great, Erin,” Bella beams. “I’m sure you’ve already impressed them plenty.”
“Do you know what kind of task they’ll set?” Brodie asks.
“No,” I say, shaking my head. “I just know it’ll be book related.”
“Sounds like it’s right up your alley,” Chase says, carrying a playful spark in his eyes.
“I’ve heard positive things about them. Hopefully, we click,” I say, trying to sound hopeful.
“I happen to have a connection to a bookstore and the library here in Huxley Bay,” Chase says, leaning in a little closer while Bella and Brodie deliberate over the menu in front of them. “If being around books is what you want, I could make a few calls. That is, if this place doesn’t work out.”
His tone is easy, confident but not cocky. It wraps around me, like the sun’s embrace on a hot summer afternoon.
“The library actually isn’t far from where I live,” he adds. “I could visit you on your lunch breaks. Say the word, Bookworm. We could have a quiet little setup in the back, somewhere between the stacks.”
“Somehow, Eighty-Seven,” I say, fighting a grin, “I don’t think you’d do too well with the no-talking rule.”
His lips curl, a hint of mischief in his eyes. “I’d purposely break it. It’ll be hard to hear that beautiful laugh of yours if we can’t talk.”
My cheeks heat, a sudden rush firing up my body, as my heart races and my thoughts scatter, and before I can say another word, he reaches for my glass of water. His fingers brush against mine as he hands it to me without breaking eye contact.
“You’ve got a little something,” he murmurs, teasing under a controlled voice. “All over your face.”
I gulp down the rest of my water then lift the menu to shield my flaming cheeks.
Too late.
He’s already seen. The low chuckle that comes from him goes right through me, setting off those damn butterflies.
He’s just a guy.
This is just lunch.
I can have a conversation.
I am not my mother.
Twenty minutes later, I’m stuffed. The food was delicious and we learned they don’t have a set menu here; it changes every week.
“Bella showed me pictures of where you guys will be staying in California,” I say as the desserts are brought to the table. “It looks amazing.”
Brodie puts his arm around Bella, tugging her close. “Yeah, it’s central to the office and has some kick-ass food places around.”
“Can you believe that in just a few weeks we’ll be scouting buildings for—what’s Roman calling it now? The Hidden Palooza Base?” Bella shakes her head, laughing.
A low laugh rumbles out of Brodie. “Gotta love his persistence.”
I glance over at Chase out of the corner of my eye. He has his fork in his hand, but he’s not really eating. I can’t help but wonder if he doesn’t like the tiramisu we agreed upon, or if there’s another issue bothering him.
The conversation that was naturally bouncing between us drifted into a mostly two-sided discussion right after the desserts were brought out.
I nudge him with my foot. He looks over at me, and his blue eyes fill with a look I don’t know how to name but it nearly makes me forget how to breathe. There’s not hurt in his gaze, but there’s definitely an intensity there.
An unspoken heaviness.
I wonder if it’s hockey related. Curiosity about Chase and his relationship with sports gnaws at me. I get the impression there’s more to it than just an injury.
The scrape of his chair pulls my attention. I look up just in time to see Chase slide out of his seat, his expression unreadable. The air in the room drops to a colder degree, even though the temperature hasn’t changed.
“I’m just gonna step outside for a minute.” His voice is tight, but every word leaves a mark, and before I can say anything, he turns and walks out of the chalet without sparing any of us a glance.
And just like that, I don’t want to be here anymore. Instead, I find myself wanting to be where he is.
My mind works in overdrive as I try to figure out what changed between the tapas being cleared from the table and the desserts arriving.
It was like a switch was flipped.
My fingers twitch on the table. I know I shouldn’t be thinking this way. I know I should keep my distance. It’s dangerous thinking about wanting to be near him. I know the risks. I know what can happen if I let my guard down.
But, in a way I didn’t expect, I don’t care.
I picture sitting in the comfortable gray chair in front of Roberta and let her words center me.
“You don’t need to stay away from all men to avoid becoming her. Just like you don’t have to have a perfect relationship to prove that you’re not. This is all about what feels right for you when you’re ready to take those steps.”
I rise from my seat, my legs moving before I can think. I tell myself it’s nothing, that he just needs space. But there’s an annoying sensation inside me that won’t go away.
A need to make sure he’s okay.
When I open my eyes, Bella’s green ones are shining at me with pride, and her hand is in Brodie’s.
I give her a subtle nod, and then I’m walking toward the exit, my nerves lighting up with every step I take. Part of me can’t believe I’m doing this. I should stop. Turn around and sit back down.
But I’m not going to.
I’m not my mother.