2. Marcus
2
MARCUS
T he late fall sun beat down on the sprawling campus of Julius High as I made my way through the crowded hallways. The air was thick with the scent of freshly waxed floors and the nervous energy of students starting a new quarter. For me, Marcus Jennings, it wasn't just a new year—it was a whole new beginning.
Being the new quarterback at Julius High was more than just a fresh start; it was a lifeline I desperately needed. My last school had been a disaster, ending with an expulsion after an ugly incident involving my ex-girlfriend and the guy she cheated with. The memory of it still made my stomach churn, but I forced it down. I had to put all that behind me and focus on what mattered now: football, grades, and staying out of trouble.
As I navigated the unfamiliar hallways, the weight of my family's expectations pressed down on my shoulders. We weren't well-off, and this scholarship was my ticket—our ticket—to a better future. I wanted to give my mother the life she deserved after sacrificing everything to support me. Now it was my turn to make her proud. Playing for Julius High's football team and keeping my grades up wasn't just important; it was crucial. If I failed, I'd lose my free education and my chance to break the cycle of poverty we were stuck in.
I adjusted my backpack, feeling the strain of textbooks I hadn't quite opened yet. My next class was English Literature, a subject that might as well have been written in hieroglyphics. As I rounded the corner, I spotted a familiar face by the lockers—Caleb, the school's official English tutor. Mrs. Johnson, my new English teacher, had suggested I approach him for help, and now seemed as good a time as any.
Caleb was easy to recognize, he looked just like his yearbook picture from last year. Even in the sea of unfamiliar faces. He stood out with his studious look, always seeming to be buried in a book. As I walked up to him, I couldn't help but notice how attractive he was. His round, studious glasses framed his almond-shaped eyes perfectly, and his smooth, milk chocolate skin was flawless. For a moment, I felt a flutter in my chest—a dangerous distraction I couldn't afford.
I took a deep breath, steeling myself. "Hey, Caleb, right?" I said, trying to sound casual and keep my nerves in check.
He looked up from his book, clearly surprised. His eyes, a warm shade of brown, widened slightly behind his glasses. "Yeah, that's me. And you are?"
"I'm Marcus Jennings," I replied, offering a smile. "Mrs. Johnson said you're the go-to person for English tutoring." Caleb stared at me without replying, his expression unreadable. I felt my confidence waver but pressed on. "I'm struggling a bit and need to get my grades up to stay on the team. Coach Harris insisted I get help."
Caleb sighed, looking more resigned than pleased. He closed his book, a worn copy of "To Kill a Mockingbird," and tucked it under his arm. "Yeah, she mentioned someone needed help. I guess that's you?"
I nodded, trying to keep the desperation out of my voice. "I am Sir Marcus, the guy who faileth English," I said, attempting a joke to break the ice.
Caleb's lips twitched, almost forming a smile. "And if that's your best interpretation of Shakespeare, then I understand why you're failing English Literature."
"Ouch," I laughed, feeling a mix of embarrassment and amusement. "Aren't tutors supposed to encourage their tutorees, not bring them down?"
"The word is tutee," Caleb corrected, but this time there was a hint of warmth in his voice. He glanced at his watch, then back at me."Anyway, let's meet in the library after school tomorrow. We can assess where you're at and make a plan."
"Thanks, man. I really appreciate it," I said, giving him a nod before heading off to class.
As I walked away, I couldn't shake the attraction I felt. Caleb was different—he was smart, and there was something about him that drew me in. But I had to stay focused. Relationships had only ever kept me distracted, especially when unnecessary drama was involved. I'd promised myself no more dating until after high school graduation. I needed to concentrate on my goals, keep my scholarship, and make the most of this opportunity. This was my shot at a better life, and I couldn't afford to mess it up.
Throughout the rest of the day, Caleb's face kept coming to mind. In my classes, I found myself doodling in my notebook instead of taking notes. By the time football practice rolled around, I was grateful for the physical exertion—a chance to clear my head and focus on something I was actually good at.
The practice field was a welcome sight, the freshly mowed grass a vibrant green under the afternoon sun. As I joined my teammates for warm-ups, I could feel the tension in my muscles begin to ease. This was where I belonged.
"Alright, boys!" Coach Harris's booming voice carried across the field. "Let's see what you've got today!"
For the next two hours, I lost myself in the rhythm of the game. Each play Coach Harris called, I executed with precision. The weight of my past began to lift with every completed pass, every successful run. The team was coming together, and for the first time in months, I felt like I was part of something bigger than myself.
As practice wound down, Coach Harris called me over. "Great practice today, Jennings," he said, clapping me on the shoulder.
"Thanks, Coach," I replied, trying to catch my breath. "I'm just trying to show my appreciation for you not giving up on me like my last school did."
Coach's expression softened. "We all make mistakes, son. It's important we just learn from them and move on."
I nodded, feeling a lump form in my throat. "I'm learning. I promise I won't let you down."
"Good," Coach said, then his tone turned serious. "Did you meet up with Caleb? You have to pass English, meaning you need a good grade this quarter to make up for the F you received last quarter."
At the mention of Caleb's name, I felt a smile creep onto my face. I quickly bent down to tie my shoe, using the moment to compose myself. "Yeah, I met him today. We start studying tomorrow."
When I straightened up, Coach Harris was giving me an appraising look. "Caleb is openly gay," he said quietly. "Is that going to be a problem?"
I felt a flutter in my chest but kept my expression neutral. "I figured as much. The 'gay and proud' shirt and the rainbow bracelet kind of gave him away," I said with a shrug. "But don't worry, Coach. I'm not a homophobe. I have a few gay and bisexual friends, and we get along great." Coach Harris visibly relaxed, putting a hand on his chest.
"Good to hear that because Julius High doesn't tolerate hate speech or hate crimes."
"Don't worry, Coach. I'll make sure everything goes smoothly," I assured him.
As I left the locker room later, my mind was a whirlwind of thoughts. I pulled out my old iPhone and dialed my best friend Kim's number. She was the only one who knew about my interest in men, and I needed her advice—and maybe a favor.
"Hey, Markey," Kim's cheerful voice came through the speaker.
"Kim, I need a favor," I said, cutting to the chase. "I wanted to take my tutor to the movies as a thank you for helping me out. Do you think you can help a brother out with some free tickets and snacks?"
There was a pause on the other end of the line. "Marcus," Kim said slowly, "you're going to get me fired with your private midnight dates."
"I promise I will make it up to you," I pleaded. "Caleb's going to be a huge help, and I just want to show my appreciation."
“A guy!" Kim's voice rose in excitement. "You're going to go on a date with a guy. After all the years I've known you, you've never taken a guy to a movie. I want all the details, and you better not leave out anything. Well, I mean, there was that one guy…"
I winced at the memory. "Please don't say his name. I'm still trying to forget that he hid his wife and child from me."
"My bad," Kim said quickly. "Yeah, that was scandalous. Do you think you're ready to date so soon? It hasn't been that long since you and the Samantha fiasco went down."
I sighed, leaning against my bike. "It's not really a date. He is just my tutor."
"Yeah, right!" Kim laughed. "Let me guess. He's a twink that wears glasses and will be valedictorian or salutatorian?"
I couldn't help but chuckle. "What can I say? I've always been into the intelligent, lean types like Stiles from Teen Wolf, Carlton Banks from that 90s show Fresh Prince of Bel-Air, and Lawrence from the HBO hit show Insecure."
"Now that you bring it up, it all makes sense. You like guys that are the antithesis of you?"
"What?"
Kim sighed dramatically. "Please tell your tutor to work on your vocabulary because I am tired of explaining every other word I speak. It means the opposite of who you are."
"You know you like it. It makes you feel smarter than you are," I teased.
Our banter continued for a few more minutes before Kim had to get back to work. As I hung up, I felt a mix of excitement and anxiety. Despite my promises to myself, I couldn't deny the attraction I felt towards Caleb. But I also couldn't forget the pain of my past relationships and the risks of losing focus on my goals.
As I pedaled home, the warm evening air whipping past me, I tried to sort out my feelings. When I arrived at this new school, I had three clear goals: graduate with a 3.0 average, get into a Division I school, and go pro after college. College was my ticket to a new life, a chance to explore all aspects of my identity without so much scrutiny. It solved all my problems—or at least, that's what I'd thought.
But now, barely a week at the new school, I was feeling something for Caleb that I couldn't ignore. It was frustrating and exhilarating all at once. I admired his confidence and authenticity, qualities I longed to embrace but felt trapped from expressing.
As I pulled into my driveway, the porch light flickering on automatically, I made a decision. I would take things one day at a time. Focus on my studies, excel in football, and see where this tentative friendship with Caleb might lead. After all, I reasoned as I wheeled my bike into the garage, there was no harm in making a new friend. And if that friendship happened to make my heart race a little faster? Well, that was just something I'd have to learn to handle.
With a deep breath, I headed inside, ready to face whatever challenges tomorrow might bring.
Little did I know, the biggest challenge of all would be keeping my growing feelings for Caleb in check while trying to navigate the complex world of high school, family expectations, and my own identity. But for now, I had English homework to tackle and a tutoring session to prepare for. One step at a time, I told myself. One step at a time.