Chapter 11
It's been just over a week since Ruby and Amelia ended their relationship.
The first few days were tough, with sleepless nights and puffy-eyed mornings, but little by little Ruby regains some normalcy in her life.
The pain lingers, not because she misses Amelia—though she does—but because of the guilt that haunts her for maintaining a relationship when she knew perfectly well that her heart belonged to someone else.
This morning she wakes up more spirited and feels today's the day to make a move with Ellie.
She won't declare her love, of course, but she's ready to test the waters, to do or say something subtle that might expose Ellie somehow, something that might give her a signal, though she still doesn't know what.
Ruby arrives at Early Bayou very determined, but when she enters and sees Ellie, her breath catches and all her determination vanishes instantly, replaced by a bundle of nerves worthy of a teenager.
Ellie wears a blue dress that hugs her figure, more makeup than usual, and heels that could cause a heart attack.
It's not the type of outfit Ellie typically wears to work on an ordinary day, Ruby knows this, but she's so hypnotized, in love—and blinded—that the only thing crossing her mind is that maybe Ellie has lunch plans with her mother at some fancy restaurant, something Ellie's mother does frequently.
"You're early today," Ellie says, approaching to give her a kiss on the cheek and an effusive hug, because Ellie loves hugging, and Ruby freezes, feeling tingles throughout her body.
"Yeah, I didn't have anything to do and didn't feel like staying home," Ruby responds.
It's not what she wanted to say when she walked in. She should tell her how beautiful she looks, or rather how radiant she is in that dress that Ruby would like to remove before sitting her on a table and doing things she shouldn't even think about, but Ruby stays silent.
"Well, I'm thrilled you're here," Ellie says. "Coffee?"
Ruby nods and follows her, eyes fixed on what she considers a perfect ass.
The morning passes while Ruby formulates phrases in her head.
Things she could say to Ellie that go a bit beyond letting her know she looks stunning.
She needs to plant a seed in her friend, make her wonder, drop some subtle bomb that makes Ellie question if she's serious or joking, and later drop another.
Keep going until her friend has no choice but to ask if there's something she needs to tell her.
The plan sounds perfect in her head, but it sucks if she doesn't dare say anything, and she's cursing herself when a guy walks in who stands out from the bar's usual clientele at this hour.
He's dressed in a suit, shiny shoes, and a watch that probably costs more than all the bar's furniture combined. In Ruby's opinion, he's too dressed up for midday, but he's probably not from the area and just passing through.
"What can I get you?" Ruby asks from her side of the bar.
The guy looks at her as if he hadn't seen her when he entered and gives her an arrogant smile full of teeth too white that Ruby thinks must be fake.
"Nothing," he responds while fiddling with his watch as if making sure everyone notices it, "I'm just here to pick up Ellie."
Something explodes in Ruby's head when she hears this, and the friendly smile she always has for customers disappears instantly when she puts the pieces together.
Ellie hasn't made plans with her mother nor dressed up because she felt like it.
She dressed up for this jerk, because she has a date with him.
As if knowing Ruby's thinking about her, Ellie emerges from the office with her purse over her shoulder and the same radiant smile she had when Ruby arrived, except now she directs it at the guy with the fake teeth and pedantic expression.
"Tim, you're right on time," Ellie says, approaching him. "Ruby, I'm going to lunch, I'll be back in a couple of hours, okay?"
"Yes, sure, no problem," Ruby responds, feeling her throat tighten.
A knot forms in her chest as she watches Tim place his hand on Ellie's lower back as they exit.
Ruby suddenly exhales, feeling something break inside her.
She stands there, still as a statue, feeling stupid for thinking once again that she could have something with Ellie.
When will she open her eyes? Ellie will never look at her that way.
The rest of the morning passes in a kind of trance, serving customers without being aware of it, cleaning and preparing orders while her mind is elsewhere, wondering who this guy is and how long Ellie has been seeing him, but mostly, why she hasn't told her about him.
Ellie returns two hours later, just as she said.
In a normal situation, Ruby would ask how it went.
But the situation isn't normal, not for Ruby, and she can't say anything, though that doesn't seem to be a problem, because Ellie herself sits on the other side of the bar across from her to tell her how it went.
"I had a good time with Tim," she says smiling. "He's a bit uptight, but he has a sense of humor."
For Ruby, hearing her say this feels like someone's slowly driving a dagger into her heart; nevertheless, she maintains her dignity, showing no emotion.
"I didn't know you were seeing someone," she murmurs, wiping the bar despite it being clean.
"Well, it's the first time I've gone out with him," Ellie explains.
"The other day I went to see my mother, and she started lecturing me about how it was time I started dating again.
You know what she thinks about divorces, the end of one marriage is just the beginning of another," she says, rolling her eyes.
Ellie leans a bit over the bar and lowers her voice to speak in confidence.
"To be honest, the last few months with Marcel there was no sex at all, and after the divorce, it was the last thing on my mind, but now that some time has passed, I feel like I need to clear the cobwebs down there," she confesses with a mischievous smile.
Ruby's throat dries up, but so does her heart.
"So I decided to listen to my mother and start dating again," she finishes, unknowingly crushing her friend.
Ruby wants to throw herself down a deep hole she can't climb out of. Ellie has just made it clear she's still interested in men, now there's no need to send any subtle or direct signals, she has no chance with her.
"Are you sure it's not too soon?" she asks desperately. "I mean, you just got out of a marriage..."
Ellie shrugs.
"At some point I'll have to be with someone again, right? Besides, I'm not going to get married, right now I just want to have fun, I'm not looking for anything serious."
Ruby nods, feeling her stomach sink as if she'd swallowed a giant rock.