51 — Catarina Rowedder
“It was the terrible, wild wind
That knocked down the doors for me to enter
Destroyed windows and the sound of drums
People couldn’t believe what I had become.”
Live life — Coldplay
The weekend went well — as far as possible —, I noticed that Jack and Norah carried a certain guilt in their expressions, and I don't judge them, if it were me, I believe it would weigh on my mind for a long time. Having your child so close and at the same time far away, without being able to cuddle, or simply share moments, is distressing. It was worse knowing how horrible his life was, because after dinner, he finally opened up to us and told us what he had said to Noah hours before, however, I know that there is much more beyond that minimum that he managed to get out. .
Gael is a calm and deep sea, immersed in scars.
This certainly hurts the heart of a father and mother as loving as both of them. Thinking about them, I feel apprehensive, not knowing what will become of us from today onwards. I could barely sleep during the night, anguished, my sixth sense warning me that something bad was about to happen, or maybe it was just nervousness about the visit that the social worker will make to us today.
However, after Gael's report, I can understand Tyler's fear when he mentions the word orphanage, and I get even more nervous thinking that there is a possibility that we will no longer have temporary custody of him from today onwards.
— Hi, love — Noah takes me out of my reverie, hugging me from behind. — Everything will be fine, I know what you're feeling, but we have to be strong for him. OK?
— My heart sinks just imagining him being taken from here. I had nightmares about it that night.
— I realized, my angel. Just try to stay calm, unfortunately, I can't promise anything, just that we'll fight for him. All good?
I turn around and snuggle into his arms, as if he were my fortress, feeling his caresses on my hair.
— Finish getting ready, she should be about to arrive.
— All good. Tell Iolanda to have some tea ready? I believe I will need it.
— I'll wait for you downstairs. — Kiss me softly, leaving our room.
Inspire.
Breathe.
Don't freak out!
Calm down, you need to show a lot of calm — I think, analyzing my reflection in the mirror.
I choose to wear a light dress shirt, beige jeans and sneakers, leaving my hair loose and putting on basic makeup, avoiding attracting too much attention. Minutes later, I'm ready to go downstairs, however, I decide to stop by Ty's room to check on him. I knock twice and go in.
— Hi, my little one. — I stop at the doorframe. — Did I disturb your reading?
—Uh, no. — I hear nervousness in his voice and I approach.
— Is there something bothering you?
— Noah told me that a woman is coming here today to see if I can stay with you, but I'm afraid.
— No one is going to take you out of here, yes good? And if you have to stay somewhere else, for any reason, we will be with you.
— Why do you want to adopt me so much?
— Because I loved you from the moment I saw you. I know I may be young to be your mother, but that's how I feel and how I hope you see me someday, in your time. And Noah felt the same way about you. Just like that, we love you like our son — I say with a choked voice.
— Me me…
— In your time, my little one, no one here will force you to do anything, okay? Stay here, I'll be back soon, the assistant should be arriving — I interrupt him and kiss his forehead, leaving my heart with him.
I leave with hurried steps, to avoid him seeing me crying, and perhaps realizing that there is the slightest chance that I won't be able to protect him from what might happen. I enter the room, breathing heavily due to nervousness, at the same moment that Iolanda tells us that the assistant has arrived.
— Iaiá, can you take her to the office, please? We will wait for you there.
— Yes. And think positive, everything has already worked out, my children.
I remember her words, walking hand in hand with him. We settled down in the armchairs placed next to the window, when we heard light knocks.
— Good morning — a woman in her forties greets. — I'm Miss Moore. — Holds out his hand to Noah. — A pleasure to meet you. — His gaze sweeps over my man's body and my blood bubbles with jealousy.
— Hello, Miss Moore, I'm Catarina. Please sit down.
— Oh, of course, thank you. — disguised , I think.
— Iaiá, can you bring us tea, please? — Noah asks, avoiding the cow.
At times like these, it makes me angry that he's so handsome, friendly and a panty—breaker, with all that politeness.
Focus, Nina! Focus on the subject here being Tyler!
— Well, as you know, I'm here to see what your situation is like and for the boy's well—being.
— Of course, feel free to ask us anything you need — Noah replies, completely helpful.
— Well, from what I've been told, you've only been in a relationship for a short time, correct?
— Yes, a few months ago — I reply, with a calmness that I don't possess at the moment.
— Right. And do you know that it is an immense responsibility to take care of a child, especially considering your recent loss?
— I'm sorry, miss, but regardless of whether I had a miscarriage or not, I would fight for custody of Tyler, because I felt connected to him the moment I saw him. I am capable of giving my life for him.
— Right, but what I want to say here is that you are getting to know each other, you should enjoy your relationship, because I have here — analyzes some sheets — that you are not even engaged, this could leave the boy vulnerable, if you change your mind, or even break up with each other.
— If it's a certificate you need, we can get married right now. Isn't it, my love? — comments Noah.
— Look, Miss Catarina, considering your status and social class, I know you can afford to keep him, however, we should analyze this further. No matter how much money you have, Tyler may not adapt to this life.
— Are you insinuating that we only aim for the financial side, without caring about the emotional aspect? — I practically growl, after hearing such nonsense.
— Calm down, sweetheart.
— Please restrain yourself. I believe he may be getting used to a temporary reality, I've seen cases like this, where the child was the most harmed and we still take into account the fact that in my opinion, you — tell me — are using him to make up for the loss of another son.
By God, if I weren't arrested for contempt, assault or something like that, I'd find myself in this crazy woman's face.
— Mr. Foster, perhaps you can try to get custody of him on your own, I can give you some help if you're interested.
— What? Listen here, I don't care if I'm harming myself... You're coming to our house...
— Hmm — he clicks his tongue, interrupting me — another point, the residence belongs to Mr. Jackson Foster, so you don't even have a fixed location.
— I don't care, since you arrived, you've been being offensive, using information you believe you know, from what you must have seen in gossip magazines, instead of focusing on the main issue, our boy's well—being.
— I'm sorry, but I don't accept this type of treatment, here, Mr. Foster — he hands him a card —, my contact details, in case you want to think more about the option I gave you.
— Oh no, you can get out of my house now! — vociferous. — James! — I call for security when opening the library door. — James! — He appears soon after.
— Yes ma'am.
— Please put that bitch out! — I push the biscuit.
— It won't stay like that, you insolent girl.
— Think better before hitting on committed men!
The little girl leaves, swearing and I start to feel bad for not controlling my temper, but she was clearly using the situation to say that I don't have the capacity to be that boy's mother.
— Love calm down! — Noah stops me from going after him and hurling some more insults.
— Calm? Calm? Calm down, if it was a man hitting on me, I bet you would have already punched him in the face. I was very peaceful.
— I know, my angel. But now, I think it's good to call Gael, I believe that after this things will get more complicated.
— Oh damn! — I put my hand over my mouth, analyzing the trouble I've gotten us into.
— Come on, let's sit down and calm down, I'll ask him to come here.
“ Dad, look at me again, I know I didn't behave, but don't let them take Ty away from us. ”