Chapter 19
Chapter Nineteen
Derek
I had a brother?
“Where is he?” I somehow managed to ask.
“In your old world,” Henriette replied. “Your father tortured you both with his magic, trying to force your own magic to come out. Your brother managed to get his magic and attacked your father. He then fell into a coma and your dad sent him away. He checked up on his location until he wasn’t able to return to your world anymore, so we know he’s likely still alive. ”
“What happened to him?” I asked, my tone lacking emotion.
“Your father believed he was too broken by that point, so he didn’t want to deal with him anymore, and since you broke down completely, he left you both and altered your mother’s memories and yours before leaving you,” Trise explained.
Grovar and Mia shared a look, before Grovar said, “We strongly believe you need your twin before you can heal. We wouldn’t advise you to leave our world until your core had time to heal fully, but now we fear you can’t heal without him by your side.”
“So, we need to find him as soon as possible?” Nolen asked.
He seemed so calm on the outside, but his feelings were anything but.
He felt scared, worried, hurt, angry, and most of all, he felt sad.
I hated that I was the reason his life turned into this mess, and maybe I was selfish for staying by his side, but if I left him, I was sure it would end me.
“Yes,” Henriette replied firmly. “We will inform the others of our findings tomorrow and we plan on you two leaving our world in a weeks’ time to search for him.”
“Do you plan on telling the others about this?” I asked, feeling out of sorts.
I was both happy and sad over the news, and more than okay with not having the memory of my brother.
It would only have hurt me more until we’d found him.
I just hoped knowing about him wouldn’t bring the memories of him back before I knew he was alive and well.
The rulers shared one of their looks. “We believe it’s best to keep it between us for the time being.
They already have so much information they’ll get and we don’t want you to feel overwhelmed either,” Trise replied.
“We have to protect Aiden, too, and everyone knowing about him will only put more pressure on him when he returns with you.”
“A-Aiden?” I stammered. His name was Aiden. I had a brother, a twin brother, and his name was Aiden. Why did knowing his name suddenly make it more real? Made him real?
Trise’s smile turned sympathetic and somehow kinder. “Yes, your brother’s name is Aiden.”
Even the soft grass under me couldn’t help ground me.
Nolen was escorting the rulers out of our home while I sat here, feeling numb, and not just numb, but powerless and weak, too.
I had a brother out there, a family member that needed me as much as I needed him, and according to the rulers, I really needed him.
They even believed I wouldn’t heal fully without him. Which was a scary thought.
All my nightmares were about my childhood, and now I understood more than ever why they kept haunting me, why I felt so broken. I was broken, but now I knew it went deeper than my magical core. My heart had been broken, and my twin held the pieces.
Nolen joined me on the grass silently. I loved that he knew how I felt and that I didn’t have to explain it to him, he simply knew. If I had to say how I felt aloud, I would break down. I was barely keeping it together as it was.
“We leave in a week,” he said, his tone low as if speaking too loudly might set me off. “The rulers told me they want to be there should you have a reaction to the portal, but they hope nothing happens so we can find Aiden.”
I almost broke then. “What will happen if, and when, we do find him?” I dared ask.
“We bring him back here so you can both heal,” he replied, as if it truly were that simple.
“I don’t think you understand what I mean,” I said, trying to voice my worries. “I don’t think I can be apart from him once we find him.”
“I know that.” He looked confused.
“Are you okay with that?” I asked, needing clarification.
If possible, he looked even more confused. “Why wouldn’t I be?”
“Not many people would want to share their house with family members, but I need him here with us.”
His confused expression turned into an understanding smile.
“I want him here, too, darling. Remember he’s family.
I want him to be happy just as much as you do.
Yes, some days I might want some alone time with you, but I don’t mind him living with us.
To be honest, it feels weird thinking of him living somewhere else.
He belongs with us, which is saying something, considering I’ve never met him.
” His expression turned into a cute confused frown, like he was trying to work out his emotions and couldn’t.
I let out a giggle. “You look like Remi did when I tried to help him with math.”
That made him smile. “I love hearing you happy.”
“I promise you, as soon as Aiden is with us, I’ll be forever happy.”
“I like the sound of that.”
I woke up feeling torn. I wanted to find Aiden now, but I also knew I had to heal a bit more.
I was terrified of leaving this world and not knowing what would happen when we entered the portal, but my need to find Aiden had me discarding my fears.
I needed him back in my life. All my life he’d been missing, and now I was set on getting him back where he belonged. Right next to me.
“Good morning,” Nolen’s raspy morning voice was a soothing reminder that I wasn’t alone anymore. Even with Aiden missing from my life, I still had my mate.
“Morning,” I whispered, then turned so I faced him. “Can I see Remi today?”
My question seemed to surprise him. “You miss him?”
I nodded. “He was the one person who could calm me down before I met you, and now that I know we’re brothers…” I let out a sigh. “I feel like I need him here this week, even if I can’t tell him about Aiden.”
He leaned in and gave me a soft kiss. “Anything for you.”
“And I want to get to know Juno, too,” I said, feeling lighter than when I woke. “We’re all family now, and it’s important to me that we stay close.”
He nodded, seeming to think something over. “I’m not as close to Juno as I am to many others from my team, but I like him. I think working on your relationship with them will be good for both of us.”
“And the fact that Remi is going through the same thing as me, Aiden and the trauma aside, I think it will help.”
“I’ll call Juno after their meeting. Maybe Remi needs this too. I promised the rulers to teach you some magic, too, but we need to start out small because of your core.”
“Can we not tell them about that?” I hurried to ask. “I don’t want to be treated like I’m broken. I am, but I don’t want them to know just how bad.”
His expression turned sad. “If that’s what you want, my darling, then we’ll keep it a secret for now. But just know that I love every part of you, broken or not. It’s you.”
Ignoring the love part, because I was definitely going to cry if I leaned more into just how much I loved hearing that. I moved closer and kissed him instead, letting his lips distract me from the mess that was my life.
While Nolen made us breakfast, I sat on the couch and watched a random documentary to learn more about this new world.
It was a fascinating watch, and with the whole magic dying out thing, they had lots of different ones showing how their world used to look.
It had definitely changed. The previously bright green grass that looked so much like the grass I was used to in my world, was a dull dried out green now.
The trees weren’t as lush and leafy either.
But the thing I found most apparent were the lack of said trees.
Normally there would be lots of forested areas and a tree here and there, but just from the brief glimpses I’d had here, trees were a rarity.
It made me appreciate the one we had in the backyard that much more.
Nolen’s voice came from the kitchen and I realized he was talking to someone else, laughing, too.
I hoped it was Juno. I’d meant what I said about needing Remi here.
He was my actual half-brother, and if he felt anything like I did, he would need someone who understood close by, too.
My calming reaction to his scent was likely because of our bond, but then again, I’d felt the same with Nix and Juno, so maybe it was because of our world I felt that soothing effect?
Nolen calmed me because we were mates, no matter how weird I still found that reality.
My heart was all in on it, my brain just needed to catch up to the whole mated-for-life thing.
The sweet scent of waffles, or was it pancakes?
Whatever it was, was pouring out from the kitchen, teasing my nose and stomach with the sweet promise of soon getting to taste it.
Nolen’s love for cooking was something I would always cherish.
How lucky was I that my handsome mate was cooking a delicious smelling breakfast just in the other room? And the best part? He was shirtless.
“Darling?” he called from the kitchen, and I was interrupted by my very visual fantasy of him feeding me breakfast while shirtless.
“Yes?” I replied, feeling a tad bit breathless.
He came into the living room with a plate stacked with waffles. “Juno said that Remi would love to come over. They just left the meeting, so maybe in an hour or two.”
I helped him set the small table and soon I had the best waffles I’d ever tasted in my mouth.
I groaned, not able to stop myself. They were perfect.
The outside was perfectly crisped and the inside soft and pillowy.
They weren’t too sweet either, making the toppings more fun to add.
I had whipped cream and strawberries on mine, plus a little drizzle of chocolate sauce that had a hint of hazelnut in it.
Nolen chuckled. “That good, huh?”
I hadn’t noticed it, but I was doing a little dance in my chair, unable to stop my body from showing just how happy I was.
And I was happy. Aiden aside, I was doing great.
I had the best mate in the whole world. I’d pretty much accepted that I was only going back to my former world to get Aiden.
After that I didn’t care much about returning.
I hadn’t had any nightmares since I met Nolen either, which was the biggest reason I was so happy.
A full night’s rest would do that to anyone, and here I was having it nightly now.
“I’m happy,” I announced, shrugging my shoulders as if it wasn’t that big a deal. But it was. I had never been happy before, but if I told Nolen just how much those words meant, I feared I would break his heart, because how sad was that?
“I’m happy, too,” he said, his voice low and a smile forming on his handsome face.