Seventeen
Princess Emeline
C ecily runs over to Skarth, throwing her arms around him while I take one step back.
And then another.
Ulf watches me closely with a smug smirk, for he knows what this is doing to me. Was he the one who sought Cecily out? I feel sick to my stomach.
With shame riddling me, I fold my arms across my chest. The laces on my dress are crudely tied together to conceal what Skarth and I did with one another earlier. But that’s a thing of the past because everything has now changed.
He is going to be a father.
And me? I am a mistress…something I promised to never be again.
“Princess,” Cecily gushes, letting Skarth go and bending into a curtsey before me. “It’s so good to see you.”
All I can focus on is her rounded belly.
“And you,” I reply, quashing down my need to scream into the heavens. “If you’ll excuse me, the journey has exhausted me.”
I don’t wait for her to reply and quickly make my way toward a tent and disappear inside. The moment I’m alone, I bend in half, place my hands on my knees and take three calming breaths. It does nothing to calm my nerves.
Even though I’ve always factored Cecily into my relationship with Skarth, her being with child was something I never foresaw. How can I ask him to choose me when there is a child involved?
I can’t.
“Everything all right, Princess?”
Ulf’s smooth voice has me taking a final calming breath before coming to a stand.
“Yes, I am fine. Just tired. May I retire in here?”
“Of course. You are always welcome in my bed.”
I’m too tired to fight him, so I make my way over to the furs spread out before the fire on the ground and lie down. Turning on my side, I use my hands as a pillow and stare into the flames.
Every inch of me is numb.
With Skarth by my side, I felt that there was hope, but now, there is none. Tonight, his wife and unborn child will sleep in his bed while I sleep beside a man who I don’t particularly like but can’t seem to stay away from.
Ulf comes to rest beside me, but my back is turned to him because I cannot face him as I’m certain he is aware of what happened between Skarth and me.
“What bothers you?”
“Everything,” I reply softly. “Did you seek Cecily out?”
I need to know if she found Ulf or if he sought her out.
“She was not hard to find,” he confesses. “As it was, she was looking for Skarth.”
“Of course. To tell him the good news,” I assume, although my tone sounds far from jubilant.
“Yes, but to also inform him of your father.”
“What of him?”
I turn around to face him.
He doesn’t shift away, so we are lying very close together. “Cecily said he has assembled a very large army to fight with King Egbert and that anyone associated with any Northman is in danger. That’s why she fled.”
I gasp, horrified. “What of her family?”
I have fond memories of them, of Osanna and Cuthbert as they welcomed me into their home.
If my father has done anything to hurt them, I’ll never forgive him.
“She did not say, but for her to flee, it seems no one is safe.”
“I cannot believe I am his kin,” I whisper to myself. “All that matters to him is his wealth and his title of king. It makes me sick.”
Cecily, like me, it seems, is a fugitive too. No wonder she came looking for Skarth.
“It does not bother you that your father fights with Wessex for your return?” he poses in interest.
“I’ve learned long ago that I am merely a trading pawn for my father,” I reply. “He does not care for my happiness. Only his.”
“Is that why you are here? With the heathens instead of the Saxons?”
“You think I do this to defy my father? To thumb my nose at him like a spoiled little brat?”
His silence is the answer I need.
“I can assure you, that is not the reason.”
“Then what is?”
I know what he is doing. He wants me to confess my feelings for Skarth, because what would that mean now that Cecily is here?
“It is the reason for my very existence,” I admit, unable to stop my feelings from spilling free. “But things change, and sometimes, you are forced to change with them.”
He nods. “So what happens now?”
“Skarth does not want me to fight. He wishes for me to go hide on a ship while you battle against the men who destroyed my life,” I share, not omitting my bitterness. “He wants me to go to Scandinavia until we can work out a plan where I can return back here safely.”
“And what do you want?”
“I do not wish to hide like a frightened little mouse,” I declare firmly. “This is my fight as well. Against Wessex and Northumbria.”
“Then fight,” he states with conviction.
And that is the difference between Ulf and Skarth—Skarth would sacrifice everything for my safety, knowing I will hate him for denying me, while Ulf would simply say anything in hopes I will submit to his advances.
“That’s all I’ve done my entire life,” I confess, closing my eyes.
With a gentle touch, Ulf strokes my cheek. I would usually shy away, but I am so tired, tired of everything.
“Sleep, little mouse,” he says. “Things may seem simpler in the morning.”
But I know that’s not true because come dawn, I will have to face a reality I wish I could escape.
I jolt upright, my heart almost exploding from my chest.
Brushing the matted hair from my brow, I peer around at my surroundings because, for a split moment in time, I had the luxury of forgetting where I am. But as the truth comes crashing into me, it’s evident sleep hasn’t helped numb this pain in my chest.
The fire is still burning, thanks to Ulf. I wonder where he is.
I don’t wish to rise, but I can’t stay hidden forever, so I stand, stretching the sleep from my bones. I assume that the Northmen will eat before we move on. We can’t stay in one place for too long, which has me wondering what that means for Cecily.
The journeys will be long and treacherous. I can’t imagine Skarth would want her accompanying us in her…condition.
I can’t even bring myself to say it, and I know how selfish that is.
Putting on a brave face, I step outside, clutching the fur around my shoulders. It’s not mine, and I’m fairly certain it’s Ulf’s. He has been kind to me, but I’m still unsure if he’s doing this because he cares or because I am valuable to him.
“Good morning, Princess.”
Ulf appears, offering me a cup of ale.
My queasy stomach gurgles. “Thank you, but it’s a little early.”
“It is never too early for ale,” he teases but doesn’t push.
I keep my eyes on him because I’m afraid of what I’ll see. “Are we leaving soon?”
“Yes. The king’s guard will be looking for us.”
“Okay. I just need to freshen up.”
Ulf nods, and I quickly head for the woods where I can have some privacy. I keep my head down the entire time because I don’t want to see Skarth.
Once I have relieved myself, I pick some mint and chew on it to freshen my breath and ease my stomach. There is a small stream that runs through the woods, so I cup the cool water to wash my face and freshen up.
Cleanliness is next to godliness, our priest would say. If he knew of the sins I committed, I am fairly certain he would agree there aren’t enough prayers to save my soul.
The rustle of the leaves hints I am no longer alone.
Coming to a stand, I turn and am disappointed Ulf stands before me and not Skarth. But I don’t let it show.
“We are to make our move,” he says, but what he reveals next has me almost inhaling my tongue. “We all agree that it is safer and wiser to travel in smaller groups. You will come with me, Inga, Gorm, Orm, Bodil, Skarth, and Cecily.”
“Why must we travel with them?” I ask when I can speak.
“With who?” he questions with an arrogant grin.
I don’t give him the satisfaction of replying because he knows whom I speak of.
Putting on a brave face, I march past him, and when I push into the clearing in the forest, I come face-to-face with the man who can render me speechless with a look alone.
Skarth and I lock eyes, and it’s the first time I’ve seen him since I all but fled into the night like the coward that I am. Someone speaks to him, but he isn’t listening because, as it’s always been between us, the world simply fades into the background when we stare in each other’s eyes.
I can see his confusion, his pain, which dances with mine. I almost wish we never left the safety of the cave because it was there we could finally let down our walls and give in to temptation.
But as Cecily appears, reality comes crashing down around us, and I instantly avert my gaze.
“Princess,” she gushes, bowing.
“Please, Cecily, there is no need to bow,” I instruct. “Not in your condition.”
Skarth clenches his jaw while Cecily smiles, none the wiser. “Your kindness knows no bounds. I believe we will be traveling together?”
“Yes, I believe so,” I reply, quickly peering at Skarth.
“I am glad. Time has passed us by, and I am saddened we have been unable to talk.”
I try my best to smile because she doesn’t want to hear what I want to say. “Then let us talk until our hearts are content. I wish to know all about your family. How is Cuthbert? Osanna?”
However, when she casts her gaze downward, it seems there is much to discuss.
Ulf towers behind me, and I don’t fail to notice Skarth’s eyes narrow into slits. He doesn’t like Ulf standing so close. He has no right to me, not when his pregnant wife stands by his side.
“You are riding with me, Princess.” Ulf doesn’t give me an opportunity to decline.
With one last look at Skarth, I follow Ulf as he walks toward his horse. He mounts him before offering me his hand.
“I won’t bite…unless you want me to,” he adds with a sultry tenor.
Raising my eyes to the heavens, I place my hand in his, ignoring the heat which washes over me. Although he annoys me to no end, I cannot deny this attraction I feel for him. Though it borders between love and hate.
I sit behind him, but he reaches around and moves me closer so we are pressed flesh to flesh. The heat soon revolves into an inferno, but the flames douse when Skarth and Cecily ride up beside us.
Skarth’s eyes focus on my arms around Ulf’s waist. When I attempt to retreat, Ulf simply holds my hands prisoner in one of his. He is challenging Skarth to react.
He doesn’t, which selfishly disappoints me.
“Never let your guard down,” he warns Ulf. “We keep off the tracks. We ride until nightfall.”
“ Hvat segir tú? ” Ulf says lightly.
A low growl escapes Skarth, which has me guessing that whatever Ulf just said is, yet again, another challenge. “You heard me. Protect Emeline with your life.”
The mood soon turns serious as Ulf nods.
Skarth clucks his tongue, commanding his horse to make haste. Ulf follows, and we commence our journey toward the unknown.
We’ve ridden all day, and I know this landscape well. We will arrive in Carhampton on schedule. As long as we continue to avoid the king’s guard, that is.
Today, we were fortunate. But I know every day won’t be as lucky.
Ulf said his men should have reached his homeland by now and that his people will be preparing for the journey to England. I don’t know how many are coming, but I expect a lot.
I know this battle will be bloody, and many lives will be lost. But losing isn’t an option. We must win.
Skarth slows down when we reach a thickly wooded area. There is coverage and a stream close by. I assume we will rest here for the night.
Ulf directs his horse toward the stream.
He dismounts and offers me his hand. I accept, but he surprises me when he drags me toward him and wraps his arms around my waist to lift me off the horse.
I am suspended in his arms. Our faces are inches apart. My breathing hitches. My heart begins to race. This is awfully close, but I can’t seem to pull away.
“Do you want me to carry you, Princess?” he quips, which is what I needed to remind me of the arrogant bastard which lies beneath this handsome face.
“No, I do not.” There is no conviction to my tone, but Ulf does as I request.
My shaky legs take a moment to adjust, and I assure myself that’s because of riding all day and has nothing to do with Ulf.
I leave him to tend to his horse and decide to seek out Cecily. I cannot avoid her. I see her sitting on a fallen tree branch. She looks pale.
“Cecily!” I call out, quickening my step. “Is everything all right?”
“I am fine. Just a little nauseous. It will pass. Please, sit with me.”
I sit beside her, and the dots of perspiration lining her brow confirm she is far from being all right.
“Are you able to keep anything down?”
She shakes her head. “I have been told this is normal, but I worry.”
“It is normal,” I assure her gently. “I experienced it too.”
Her eyes widen. “You were with child?”
My heart still aches at the fact. “Yes, I was. He was not meant for this world, though. God had other plans for him.”
This is what my priest told me, but I can’t help but feel this is merely an excuse, for what merciful God would take an unborn child? What God would take his life before he had a chance to live?
“Oh, Emeline,” Cecily coos, tears in her eyes. “I am so sorry.”
“What is done is done,” I reply, not wanting sympathy. “Now, we must ensure your child is fed.”
I stand, but Cecily reaches for my hand. “Thank you, Princess. You have always been so kind to me. I thank God for the day we met.”
All I can do is smile because I don’t think she would feel that way if she knew what I have done.
I decide to hunt for herbs as I know of some which helped ease my nausea. Cecily will be able to stomach something after this.
“Where are you off to?” Ulf asks, walking beside me.
“I am going to find something to help settle Cecily’s stomach.”
“She shouldn’t be here,” he says, surprising me.
“Then why did you seek her out?”
He grips my arm and gently ushers me away from prying eyes. “I’ve been thinking about Carhampton.”
“What of it?”
“Will you fight?”
“Of course I will,” I state, not interested in yet another man telling me what to do.
His hair is interwoven into three braids where it comes together in one long plait that runs down his back. This hairstyle flaunts his face, and I hate that his face is undeniably handsome. He is rugged and commands control with those piercing eyes.
I should look away. But I can’t.
“I know Skarth will do everything in his power to ensure that does not happen,” he says, revealing he has insight into Skarth’s thoughts. “But I want to assure you, I will do what you want me to. I will not take your choices away.
“This war is yours as well as mine. I vow to protect you on the battlefield…and off it if you wish.”
This isn’t the first time Ulf has said this to me. At first, I believed it was because he needed me to succeed in his plans. But now, I’m not so sure.
“Would you like that, Princess?”
“I do not need your protection. On or off the battlefield,” I counter, but my argument is weak.
Ulf lowers his face to mine. “Do you fear me? Is that why you continue to refuse me?”
“No, I do not. I have faced far worse things in my life than a coquettish Northman,” I spit, refusing to cower.
Ulf shakes his head, however, revealing I have misunderstood. “You fear me because of what I make you feel,” he states hoarsely, inches from my lips. “You do not want to like the monster of this story because what would that say about you?”
He is so close; I can feel his breath against my heated cheeks.
He is aware of the effect he has on me, which is why I stand on tippy-toes and reply, “It would say keep your friends close, but your enemies even closer.”
A slanted smirk spreads across his face. “You can keep me as close as you want, Princess.”
He always has an answer for everything.
With a snicker, I decide to leave this conversation, afraid of what I will say because I seem to lose good sense when Ulf is involved.
Pushing past him, I make my way through the thickets, thankful the thick shrubbery conceals me because I need time alone. I venture deep into the woods, needing to get away from everyone. The person I need to escape from the most, however, is me.
I don’t know why I allow Ulf to get under my skin. I shouldn’t allow him to affect me, but he does. He has from the first moment we met.
I always envisioned a future with Skarth, even when I was a wife and a mistress, but everything is different now. I didn’t anticipate Cecily being with child nor did I predict I’d meet someone like Ulf the Bloody.
His vow to protect me has left me feeling unsettled.
I decide to search for some peppermint and chamomile as this concoction helped me when I was with child. On instinct, I place my hands on my flat belly, thinking of the son who never saw the light of day. I wonder if I will experience that again.
Sniffing back my tears, I venture deeper into the woods, enjoying the silence. I find chamomile growing robustly and bend to pick some, but before I have a chance, someone is at my back, shoving my front against the trunk of a towering tree.
I don’t fight because I know who it is.
“I taught you better than that,” Skarth says into my ear.
“Why fight the inevitable?” I reply, my heart beginning to race.
Skarth’s chest is pressed to my back, and even though I can scarcely breathe, he’s not close enough. This is the first time he’s spoken to me since our lives were turned upside down.
“Because you fight. Always,” he states with conviction, and I sense there is a hidden meaning behind his words.
“Just how you are fighting for your wife?” I counter with bite. “Fighting for her and your child’s safety?”
“I didn’t know, Emeline.”
“It matters not now, for you are going to be a father. Do not worry, I will not tell her what happened between us.”
“I am not worried. I am…” But he pauses.
“You are what?” My breaths escape me in a rush of winded chaos.
“I am murderous…and I have no right to be because my wife is here, but all I can think about is…you. About your taste and your desperate moans as I buried myself inside you.
“All I can think about is how, for the first time in my life, I felt peace. I did not care about the mayhem because when I am with you, Emeline, nothing else matters but us. But now…with Cecily…and…Ulf.”
His snarl before mentioning Ulf has a bubble of hope rising. If he is jealous, that is because he cares.
“It’s no longer just us, and Ulf knows it. What did he whisper into your ear?”
“What time?” I’m goading him because I like his envy.
“Do not provoke me,” he warns, his lips caressing the shell of my ear.
“And if I do?”
With a growl, he reaches for my wrists and slams my palms against the tree, holding me prisoner. The feel of his hard body pressed to me has me growing wet between the legs.
“Tell me what Ulf said.”
The more he speaks, the angrier he becomes. I like it when he’s angry. I like when he loses control.
“He vowed to protect me on the battlefield…and off it if I wished,” I reply, recounting Ulf’s words.
A rumble permeates the air. “And what was your response?”
“What business is that of yours? You are a married man with responsibilities that no longer involve me.”
“Emeline,” Skarth warns dangerously low.
He tightens his hold on my wrists so hard that it begins to hurt. But I like the pain. It’s the first time since Skarth left me that I feel alive.
So I continue to goad him.
“He believes I fear him because of the feelings he rouses in me.”
“And is he right?”
“He is not right…nor is he wrong.” This neither confirms nor denies my feelings, and that drives Skarth mad.
“Why do you fucking insist on defying me over and over?” he furiously declares. “I should punish you in ways you cannot imagine!”
With a victorious grin, I reply, “And that is the reason.”
Skarth spins me around and slams his mouth over mine, robbing me of air as he kisses me frantically. He threads his fingers through my loose hair and angles my head to bend to his command. He is in complete control.
His kisses are punishing. My lips are bruised, but I welcome it because this shows me that he cares. That he is just as conflicted as I am. We know what we should do—what the right thing to do is—but sinning has never felt this good.
He severs the kiss, only to bite me on the side of the throat. He is like an animal, weakening its prey. He trails down and kisses over the tops of my heaving breasts. He slides his tongue between the valley, flicking from side to side.
“I can smell him on your skin,” he snarls, and of course, he can because I was pressed to Ulf all day. “I am going to mark what is mine so you will never forget who you belong to.”
I wildly tear at Skarth’s trousers, and he lifts me, positioning me over his straining manhood. I wrap my legs around him, and without preparation, he slams me onto his length. A pained cry leaves me because he is not gentle, but I don’t want him to be.
To feel him inside me again…it is pure ecstasy.
He holds me tightly, encouraging me to bounce on his manhood. And I do.
Each time he sinks into me, I feel him so deeply, it brings tears to my eyes. I rock against him, relishing in the way we fit. With one hand wrapped around my waist, he snakes the other around the back of my nape and holds me prisoner as he pumps his hips.
I am bound to him because I can’t move, and I wish to never separate again.
“Tell me who you belong to,” he demands, his face twisting in euphoria as I rotate my hips.
“I belong to no one, Lord,” I taunt, biting my bottom lip as he increases the tempo of his brutal strokes.
I grow lax, merely his puppet to defile over and over again.
He is a beast, uncontrolled and dominant, as he erases the scent of another man from my skin. He pulls out of me, only to rub his manhood on my nether lips. He truly is marking me, it seems.
I try to take him back into me, but he holds his length, stubbornly depriving me of what I want. What I need.
“Tell me,” he orders, cupping my chin between his fingers. “Emeline, no more raillery. Tell me.”
His desperate eyes search my face for answers, and I see that he is afraid; afraid that Ulf is right. My heart hurts, for how could he believe I would want anyone but him?
My tongue darts out, licking his finger leisurely. A sated moan escapes his plump lips.
“Give me what I want, and I will tell you.”
We lock eyes as he surrenders and reenters me, painfully slow.
His strength is conveyed as he holds me with ease, bouncing me up and down on his manhood. I lose myself to the rhythm, to the carnality of being with a man who is the ultimate sin.
Skarth owns me—mind, body, and soul.
Under the moonlight, a princess and her Northman relinquish what is right and wrong and seal their union with a fated kiss.
“I belong to you, Skarth the Godless. I always have. I always will,” I confess, pressing my lips to his. “My heart is eternally yours. As is my body. I dream of the day when we can roam freely, unashamed of the…love we share.”
I want to tell him that I love him, that I have loved him since I was a little girl, but he knows. Just how I know he feels the same way about me.
“You are in my heart. Forever.”
I know what this is. It’s goodbye, for a world where Cecily and Skarth’s child exists is a world where we cannot be together. And I knew that from the moment he pressed his lips to mine.
I hold back my tears as he defiles me hard because I do not know when we can be together like this again. I wish it was different, but I know Skarth won’t abandon his family, and that’s one of the reasons I love him so.
With a low groan, he releases his seed into me, knowing what this could mean.
I don’t have a chance to ask him why he would do that because he drops to his knees before me and lifts my dress to bury himself between my legs. He licks and suckles at my throbbing mound while I thread my fingers through his long hair, holding him prisoner as he pleasures me with his mouth and tongue.
Skarth is a generous lover, ensuring I’m never left unsatisfied. I never knew this act even existed before Skarth. He has taught me so much. And I am going to miss him immensely.
He twirls his tongue inside me, rubbing his face from side to side. His beard adds to the sensation, and my legs grow weak, for it won’t be long until I explode. I ride his face, unashamed, peering down and watching my lover pleasure me passionately.
“Do you enjoy my taste?” I boldly ask.
He pulls away, only to lick my nether lips from bottom to top. He continues lapping at them, ensuring to maintain eye contact with me. He flicks his tongue in and out, in and out, before sucking over my sensitive nub.
“All the saints above,” I curse, arching into him as he spreads my legs wider.
I don’t know how I’ll survive without this, for I know I will never experience this passion with another man ever again.
Skarth bites over me, and with a sharp slap of the underside of his tongue against my swollen center, a wave tackles me from the inside out, and I cry out my release, undulating in song with my screams. The world is shrouded in promise, but once the last tremor racks me, I am brought down to earth.
I sag against Skarth, toying with his hair as he remains on his knees before me. I lower my dress, but neither of us is in any hurry to leave.
“I am fighting at Carhampton,” I say, continuing to stroke his hair.
“I knew you would not give up,” he replies, fatigue overtaking him as he closes his eyes.
“And you cannot stop me.”
“I will continue to try,” he counters, a sure sign this isn’t over.
I don’t press further because it is nice to bask in the silence. But that is soon shattered when we hear a guttural scream catch the night air.
It’s that of a female.
Skarth springs to his feet, running through the woods.
I follow him but am not as fast as he is, and when I finally arrive where the Northmen have set up camp to see Skarth cradle a bleeding Cecily who is lying on the ground, I know this is our punishment for giving in to temptation.
“Let me through!” I demand, rushing over to Cecily.
“Help m-me, Emeline,” she sobs, tears running down her cheeks. “I fear my baby is dying.”
The front of her dress is stained a bright red.
“Your baby is going to be fine. I promise you. Get her inside,” I command Skarth.
He nods, gently picking her up and taking her toward a tent. His love for her is evident, which just hurts all the more.
Retrieving a bucket of fresh water, I seek out Ulf in the crowd. “I need you to find me wormwood and mint.”
He folds his arms across his broad chest. “And what do I get in return? If I bend to your demands, Princess?”
The world is on my shoulders, and I surrender because I am so tired of it all. I do not have time for games. Without those herbs, Cecily and her baby are at risk. “I accept your offer. I request your protection…on and off the battlefield. I yield to you, Ulf the Bloody. I am yours.”
He closes his eyes, inhaling deeply as if savoring the moment of victory. “Then I will go find your herbs,” he finally says, opening his eyes.
We stare at one another because although I surrendered, it wasn’t all forced…and I hate myself for it. I agreed to Ulf’s terms because a part of me wanted to, and he knows it.
He turns his back and does as I asked, but I know he will expect the same of me.
With a bucket in hand, I make my way into the tent, ensuring I don’t let my emotions show. Skarth is sitting beside Cecily, who is lying on her back. He is riddled with worry, which is why he needs to leave.
“Please, will you give us some privacy?”
He looks at me like I’ve gone mad, as I am asking he abandon his bleeding wife when she needs him more than ever.
“Please, Skarth,” I press, coming to kneel beside Cecily, facing him. “I promise, I will try to save your baby, but I cannot do that with you breathing down my neck.”
Cecily whimpers, holding Skarth’s hand tightly. “It’s okay, my love. I trust Emeline. She would never hurt us.”
I lower my eyes because I already have.
With reluctance, he agrees, pressing a kiss to Cecily’s forehead. Those lips were pressed to me moments ago.
“I will just be outside,” he promises her before looking at me.
The silence is heavy with unspoken words. All I can do is nod.
He stands, looking at his wife and unborn baby with love and concern, and at this moment, I know I have to let him go.
Once he’s gone, I focus on what’s important, and that’s Cecily.
“Is my baby dying?” she cries, peering down at her bloody gown.
“Pray to the Lord, Cecily,” I say, gently pulling back her dress.
Her inner thighs are stained a bright red.
Memories suddenly assault me because I was once Cecily, but I refuse to let another baby die. Regardless that she and this baby are the reason I cannot be with the man I love, I will not allow any harm to come to them.
Cecily commences prayer while I use a cloth and water to wipe away the blood.
The bleeding has stopped to just a trickle, which is a good sign. However, I need to examine her more thoroughly.
“Cecily, tell me about your wedding day,” I say with a small smile as I wring out the cloth.
Her damp hair sticks to her perspiring forehead, and she breathes through the pain. “It was a warm summer’s day,” she commences, staring off into the distance, lost in thought. “Skarth looked so becoming.”
I ignore the pang in my heart and instead focus on gently prodding Cecily. She flinches as I insert two fingers inside her but continues.
“We got married in the village. It was a small affair. But it was everything I could ever wish for.”
I turn my fingers, hoping to feel something. This is what was done to me when I was with child. I knew from the face of the doctor what my prognosis was.
“Skarth wore my favorite leather tunic even though I knew he hated it.” She chuckles, lost to the memories and not what I am doing to her.
This is why I asked her to recall a happy memory to distract her. Sadly, there wasn’t one for me to remember.
“I love him so much,” she says, her voice quivering. “I would do anything to make him happy. I cannot lose his baby, Emeline.”
“And you have not,” I reveal, my fingers brushing over her baby. I exhale a sigh of relief.
She didn’t even realize I was examining her until I remove my bloody fingers. “My baby is okay?”
“Yes, your baby is healthy. He is strong. Just like his father,” I say, unable to help but feel bittersweet.
Cecily bursts into tears.
Lowering her dress, I wash my hands in the bucket and dry them on my dress. “You must be careful from now on. You must not eat certain foods. Or allow stress to affect you.”
“That is all I have been doing,” she confesses. “I rode out here to find Skarth, knowing the consequences. But—”
“But love stops for no one,” I fill in the blanks because I can relate.
She nods, sniffing back her tears. “Thank you, Emeline. You are righteous. And honorable.”
I don’t deserve her kind words, so I stand. “Skarth, you may enter.”
I know he is just outside, so he rushes in, worry etched all over his handsome face. “Your baby is fine. I have told Cecily she needs to rest. She cannot be out here, exposed to these harsh elements.”
Ulf enters, hands filled with herbs. “Is this enough?”
I can’t help but smile at his naivety. “More than enough.”
He offers them to me, ensuring to brush his fingers against mine, something Skarth sees. But there is nothing we can do, as this proves he will always choose his family over me—which is what he should do.
“Boil this into a liquid and have Cecily sip it. It will help soothe her cramps,” I instruct Skarth as I offer him the herbs.
He accepts with a nod.
Ulf doesn’t leave, and when Skarth looks at me, he senses that’s because Ulf is waiting for me. He doesn’t know of the promise I made to Ulf to save his wife and child, and he never will, for I do not want him to feel guilty for the choice I made.
I go to leave, but Skarth reaches out and gently grips my wrist. His touch sets me on fire. It always will.
“Thank you.”
He knows if I let any harm come to Cecily and his baby, we could be together, but I couldn’t do that. In good faith, I could not live with myself if I stole Skarth that way.
“You are welcome.” I look into the eyes of the man I love because this is our final goodbye.
Holding back my tears, I exit the tent and gulp in mouthfuls of fresh air because I’m certain I’m moments away from suffocating.
Ulf simply wraps his arm around my shoulders and leads me toward his tent. When inside, I stand numbly, unsure what happens next.
I then remember my promise.
Mechanically, I lift my dress over my head and stand before Ulf, naked. This is what he wanted, was it not? For me to submit to him.
He stands across from me, his eyes hungrily eating over scraps of flesh. I don’t conceal my nudity. What would be the point?
He doesn’t say a word as he merely examines me.
I thought he would be on me the moment we were alone, but he does something which changes the course of everything.
Removing his fur shawl, he steps forward, and with eyes still locked on me, he wraps it around my shoulders.
“I-I don’t understand,” I say, unsure why he is covering me up when he’s been desperate to see me disrobe since we met.
He lifts my chin with his finger. “I will not force myself on you. Nor do I want you to force yourself on me. When we fuck…it is going to be because you want me as much as I want you.”
My lips part because he has stolen the breath and words from my mouth.
“Nor will you be slathered in the scent of another man.”
My cheeks heat because he knows what Skarth and I did.
“And you still want me?” I question, unable to hold back my tears. “When you know what I did? When you know that my heart belongs to another?”
Ulf rubs his thumb across my mouth. “Yes, Princess, because one day, that heart will belong to me. I promise you that.”
Once again, I am caught speechless, for a part of me believes his vow.
“I know you want to fight…but with Cecily…it makes sense for both of you to be on water, not land. She will need someone strong to protect her.
“But I made a promise to you. If you wish to fight, then I will protect you with my life.”
My heart, which I believed to be shattered beyond repair, beats soundly once again. I don’t know what I feel for Ulf, but what I do know is that I misjudged him.
“How do we do that, though?” I ask, wrapping the fur around me snugly. “If King Egbert does not see me, he will not relinquish.”
Ulf nods. “As long as we present someone who looks like you, it’ll buy us enough time to enforce your plan of attack.”
He’s right.
Suddenly, another plan surfaces.
Ulf grins, and the sight stirs something inside me. “Princess, your deviancy stirs the longing in my—”
But I cut him off as his vulgarity is not appropriate in a time such as this. “What if I am on the battlefield…but we trick King Egbert at the last minute? He will not expect an ambush, especially one where I find haven on the seas.
“He will have his men guarding the lands, but what if we tunnel underneath , which will give access to the lands by the Northmen as well as the waters, and also an escape route for Cecily and me?”
Ulf shakes his head, and I mistake his response for a negative one.
“You do not think it can be done?”
“No, I think it is a brilliant idea,” he says in awe. “But what it means is that we need to get to Carhampton days ahead of King Egbert and his men.”
“Can it be done?”
Ulf steals my breath as he leans forward and whispers inches from my lips, “How fast can you dig?”
We’ve found common ground, and just like that, the enemy has turned into an ally and also a betrothed.