Phoebe
P hoebe was painting a one-eyed blue alien with a guitar when she heard the studio door open.
“I’m surprised to find you in here,” Axel said. “I thought you’d be too sore to work after physio?”
“Painting after the sessions helps me maintain my mobility, otherwise my hand gets too stiff. The thicker brushes I found are helping, and even if I’m too sore to hold a pencil and sketch out new work, I can finish painting up this little guy. It’s a present for August’s birthday,” she said, sitting back to admire the adorable guitar-wielding alien sitting on Mars. Even in pain, being surrounded by the colours and the smell of the paint helped her find some relief.
“Space, guitar and an alien with a mohawk, he’s going to love it,” Axel said, admiring the canvas. “Speaking of gifts, there’s something I want to give you.”
She turned on her stool to face him as his tone turned serious.
“It’s not my birthday for another month.” She wiped her stained hands on a cloth on her easel.
“It’s not a birthday present,” he said, avoiding her gaze as he sat on the arm of the couch beside her. “With everything happening with Sheen, I put off giving this to you. Now that things have calmed down, I thought it was time.”
“You’re making me nervous,” she said, and then she recognised the journal he took out from behind his back. She’d looked for it herself after Helen’s TV interview. “Why do you have Cillian’s journal?”
“I found it when I picked out his funeral clothes. I was afraid to give it to you in case the answers inside hurt you, but I don’t want there to be any secrets between us, and I’ve no right to decide what you can or can’t handle.”
“I thought it was probably sent with some of his other stuff to his mum,” she said, flicking through the first few pages. Seeing Cillian’s handwriting stirred up her grief, but it didn’t cut like it used to. “I tried looking for it after Helen’s interview. Thought it might have some answers, to see what was going on in his mind during those last few weeks, or months. Without knowing whether we could really trust if Sheen was behind the harassment, I think I was looking for closure in some form or another.”
“I’m sorry I kept it from you,” he said, brushing his lips against her cheek.
“Don’t be. If you’d given it to me back then, I probably would’ve burnt it,” she said. She still wasn’t sure if she really wanted to know Cillian’s secrets.
“And I wouldn’t have blamed you. I’ll be down in the studio if you need me,” he said, kissing her hair before closing the door behind him.
She closed the lids of her paints, staring at the journal on the stool beside her. Flicking through the pages, she skipped to the last half-finished entry.
I fucked up royally. is never going to forgive me when she finds out. Someone already knows, and it’s only a matter of time before she leaves me for good. I thought proposing would fix everything, and if we could have just eloped like I wanted when we were in Italy then she might be more reluctant to leave me, but now that Helen is having my baby, I’m going to lose everything. Nick warned me that if I didn’t get my act together he’d tell her about the cheating, and I wouldn’t blame him. He already looks at me differently now, like I’m a walking disappointment, and when he finds out about the baby, I’m afraid they’ll kick me out of the band. I don’t want to lose them, I can’t lose and my brothers…
turned the page to keep reading, but a couple of sheets of paper fell out from the back of the journal. She picked them up, only to find they were printed-out messages from Anita.
Anita: How could you do this to the others? You’re going to ruin everyone and everything they’ve built for your own selfish desires.
Anita: I know what you’ve been doing with the make-up artist. If you don’t end it, then I’m going to tell . She doesn’t deserve to be treated this way, and I don’t like to see you so unhappy.
Anita: Drinking isn’t going to solve your problems. You’re just making life harder for yourself. Everyone would be better off without you!
The sound of barking told her Axel had probably got distracted by Bart in the garden en route to his studio session. She wanted to show him the texts, and see if he knew Anita had treated Cillian like this.
When she stepped out into the sun, there was no sign of Axel.
“What are you doing out here?” she asked, seeing Bart chained up against the wall.
He was trying to pull himself out of his collar, barking at her.
“Where’s your dad?” she asked as he lay down at her feet, whining until she undid the chain.
It wasn’t like Axel or any of the others to chain him up—Bart was well-behaved in the studio. They only attached the long chain to his collar when the gardener came because he hated the lawnmower.
Her phone buzzed. It was an email with a video file from Lena; Isaiah was also CCed in. Bart jumped up on her, and she nearly tripped over him as she tried to watch the video. The quality wasn’t great; she suspected the security guard had recorded the screen on his phone. The LouderTech logo on the wall revealed the location, but judging from the lack of people in the office and the dim lighting, it was filmed after hours.
stopped at the door to the studio when she saw a hooded figure walk through the cubicles and leave the same generic envelope Sheen had given them on Sheen’s desk.
“We can play later after I’ve talked to your dad,” she said to Bart, trying to calm him.
A message from Lena came in.
Sorry about the footage being so rough! I should have checked the quality before paying him. There is no face, but Sheen WAS telling the truth about someone leaving the envelope on his desk. From the silhouette, I think it could be a woman! This was left on his desk on Thursday, the day before the accident!!!!!
wanted to reply, but she rewatched the video instead, desperate to see if she could make out any other details. The person never looked up, but then, when the culprit left the cubicle, she saw them. The red-bottomed breakneck heels. Her stomach dropped.
“Anita.” The name caught in her throat.
Sheen was telling the truth. If she’d had breakfast, the rose bushes would have got some extra nourishment.
“Axel?” called out as she opened the studio door, even though it was a waste of time with the sound-proofing in the booth.
Had Anita planned the accident because she thought Cillian was ruining the band? She had sent him those threatening messages; she felt sick at the thought that Anita had been the one to identify Cillian’s body.
She doubted Axel had seen the messages at the back of the journal, or they would have fired Anita long ago. She scrolled through her phone to find Isaiah’s number, wanting him to find Anita before she made a run for it—if she hadn’t already. Now it made sense why Cillian was drinking so much—he was being intimidated and harassed, and who’d feel sorry for him, considering what he’d done? Anita played a great game.
“Please answer,” she begged as Isaiah’s phone rang out.
She turned down a small hall to the production room and opened the door, only to drop the phone when she saw Anita standing over Axel in the booth. His hands and neck were bound with thin wire, and he had a gash on his eyebrow. She crouched down, not wanting to be seen, and fumbled with her phone again, only to get Isaiah’s voicemail.
“Anita, help, studio,” was all she managed to send before she heard the click of the booth opening. She didn’t dare look up.
Anita found her anyway.
“Like a coward hiding, while the man you claim to love has a gun to his head.” Anita fisted her hair and smacked her head against the floor.
Disorientated, tasted blood as she bit her tongue on impact. She glared at Anita, her blood chilling as she saw the gun in her hand.
“You don’t need a gun,” fretted.
“I needed to protect myself, and this is just a little extra motivation to get you to listen.”
Anita dragged her into the booth, and she could only hope that Isaiah would see the message and come to the house as she asked. She wondered where Anita had even managed to get a gun, but it was her job to be resourceful.
She just hoped Isaiah would hurry. The burning pain of her scalp distracted her as Anita shoved her down beside the piano.
“How did you get in? Did you hurt Olivier?” Axel’s voice helped focus, but he sounded groggy. She looked up to see a thin trickle of blood dripping down his neck.
“Don’t fret,” Anita said, resting her hand on Axel’s shoulder and taking a seat on his lap. Axel tried to pull away, but she tightened the cords when he tried to speak. “Olivier is out with Nick and August, I’ve got no reason to hurt him. Maybe I should have considered punishing him. He never changed the gate code, or the security camera app password. He is supposed to be keeping you safe.” Anita kissed Axel’s cheek, and could see the hate in his eyes. “I don’t want to hurt you. I only wanted to help you see the truth.”
“What truth is that?” Axel asked, remaining calm.
“That doesn’t love you. She only cares about herself. She got Cillian killed. He started to drink, stopped writing because of her.” She turned to . “You made him reliant on you, so he could never leave you!”
“If this is about Cillian…” swallowed as the gun shook in Anita’s hand. “…why don’t we let Axel go? He didn’t do anything to you. It’s me you hate. I saw the messages you sent to him. You cared about him, wanted to protect him. You loved him…” She just wanted Axel out of the room. The cords were like razors against his throat, and she feared one aggressive tug would take him from her.
“I don’t love Cillian,” Anita snapped, and gave a tortured laugh. “Cillian was in the way. He ruined everything with his pathetic little love triangle. Because of that stupid make-up artist, you were going to break up with Cillian, and I wasn’t going to let you get your claws into Axel—I had to get rid of you!”
“Get my claws into Axel? What are you talking about? There was nothing going on between Axel and me back then. Are you starting to believe your own lies that we were having an affair?” she asked, reminded of what Anita had wanted Helen to confess during her interview.
“Do you think I’m stupid?” Anita’s nostrils flared. “I heard Axel buying your paintings; he even sent one as a gift to his family. I couldn’t stomach how devoted he was to you when you didn’t even care about him! So I thought while we were in Munich, I’d teach you a lesson in appreciation, and have Sheen destroy your studio. I had to get rid of you, because if you were single, I knew Axel wouldn’t be able to contain his feelings for you—and I was right! You both moved on before Cillian’s body was even cold.”
“Get rid of us? You really wanted us both dead? Did you hate us that much?” asked, not buying into her game. She wasn’t going to explain herself to Anita. “You knew Cillian was with Helen in the dressing room that night—you even directed me to the damn room! Did you plan the crash to get rid of us?”
“Not exactly. I didn’t expect Cillian to die, that was just a bonus. I thought a drink-driving charge would ruin Cillian’s image. Add in his cheating, and his failure to produce the songs he had promised, and he would’ve had to leave the band to save their image.”
“You’ve lost your fucking mind. How could you do such a thing? Cillian thought of you as a friend,” Axel rasped, trying to get her off his lap. used the distraction to move closer, but stilled when Anita slapped him.
“He was my friend, but he refused to get his act together! I had no choice.”
“No choice?” said. “You had nothing but choices.”
“Shut it.” Anita planted a heeled boot into ’s ribs. “You also had a choice, and you chose to get into that car with him! So what if I told Cillian you were staying with Axel in the tour bus? You should have seen what a wreck he was that morning. Riddled with guilt, and remorse, but he refused to come clean about the pregnancy and I knew what I had to do. I gave him something to take the edge off.”
“You drugged him?” asked, holding her ribs.
“There was so much in his system, I doubt a few Xanax even made a difference. I didn’t make him drive. When I told him Nick wanted him to drive you home so you could clear the air, he decided to get behind the wheel because he was so desperate to believe Nick wasn’t angry with him. That he was being given a chance to make things right. Again, why would you let Cillian drive? He smelt like he’d taken a bath in vodka. Maybe you’re the one who wanted him dead.”
“I don’t believe you; the coroner would’ve known if you drugged him,” countered.
“I identified the body. He was a famous rockstar with a reputation for partying. All I had to do was tell the coroner about his Xanax problem and that we would appreciate it if he left it off the report. Drugs in his system wasn’t a surprise. I didn’t even have to plan the accident; it was just a happy coincidence. Two birds with one stone—too bad I only got one, but I still managed to clip your wing.”
“Is that why you sent the razor blades? Because you wanted to hurt my hands even more?” asked, wondering if Anita had been behind everything or if Sheen had helped. She needed to keep Anita talking so that Isaiah would have time to get her message.
“I only did that because you cut Axel at the studio. Again, he was trying to help you, and you cut him!” Anita snarled. “If you were really worried about them then you would’ve left the house.”
“I get it—you wanted to hurt me, you want to protect the others. But why set the gallery fire? Lena has nothing to do with this, and she could’ve been killed!”
Anita moved away from Axel. “You were supposed to be there! It’s your fault she got hurt. In Italy, when I saw you together at the beach and I saw that tattoo… Matching tattoos! You really made me sick with that one. I knew you were worming your way into Axel’s heart, but that was overkill. You weren’t going to give up. You even had Axel defend you—he threw me out of the villa like I was nothing. After the reports about the break-in, another attack on a gallery wouldn’t be a surprise, and all that paint went up so fast. Sheen was the perfect cover, but he ruined everything when he busted open the door. And then he had the nerve to turn up here! When I saw him on the cameras, I knew he couldn’t be trusted, and I couldn’t let him meet with Isaiah and Nick.”
“You killed Sheen for trying to help us.” ’s heart raced as she realised Anita’s delusional love had turned her into a murderer.
Anita tapped the gun against her thigh. “You shouldn’t be worried about him, he was a threat. He was so eager to get close to all of us; he opened the door for me once I told him Nick sent me to talk with him. Then I saw the state of his apartment, and yikes, obsession would be an understatement. There are some real crazies out there—you can’t blame me for wanting to protect the band. In fact, you should be thanking me, but you couldn’t think of anyone but yourself. Your wants, your needs, your reputation.”
“You’re right, the police told us that Sheen was obsessed,” said. “You only wanted to protect them. I’m sorry I didn’t see that.”
“You’re lying—you don’t care about anyone but yourself.” Anita kicked her again, knocking the breath out of her. She recoiled to the piano, trying to protect herself, as Anita turned to Axel and stroked his cheek. “No matter what I did, Axel never looked at me the way he looked at you. The first time I saw him on stage, I knew he was the one. He was a nobody with more talent than anyone knew. I got him into the band, I made them into stars, I gave them everything they could’ve wanted, but it was never enough. You did nothing but add misery to his life with your drama, and yet he couldn’t stay away. I won’t let him destroy himself.”
Axel’s cheeks reddened as she tightened the cord around his neck. It hurt more than anything Anita could do to her.
There was no way they were going to get out of this alive without playing along with her delusions.
“You’re right, I don’t love Axel,” she rasped, clutching her chest. “I was only using him to get back at Cillian’s memory. To get even. And I drove a wedge between you to get what I wanted.”
Anita studied her, and feared she wouldn’t believe her. But then she smiled. “Finally you’re telling the truth.”
“But you’re wrong about one thing—”
“, don’t,” Axel interrupted, and Anita tightened the cord around his neck.
“Let her talk.”
felt herself go cold but forced herself to continue. “You don’t need to pretend, Axel. I know you love Anita, and I know you were only with me because you felt guilty about letting me go with Cillian that morning,” she said, before turning her attention to Anita. “Axel cares about you, and I’m the one who made him fire you. I was jealous.” The flattery tasted like ash on her tongue.
Anita started to lower the gun, and stepped slowly toward the piano to get closer to Axel. If Anita fired, she’d be able to shove him off the stool.
She tried to hide her hope. “I don’t want you to do something you’ll regret. You love him, you don’t want to hurt him. All you’ve done for him over the past few months, years—I’m sure he can see how much you care about him.”
“Even if that’s true, he won’t forgive me now. You got your claws in too deep.”She turned to Axel, stroking his cheek while pointing the gun at his temple. “We could always go together—maybe we’ll get the chance to spend our next life together. I can’t make you see how much I truly love you, and you are so blinded by your guilt that you won’t give in to your feelings for me.”
wanted to scream but no sound escaped her. She struggled to stay calm.
“No, he’s only upset because I lied. I used him to get back at Cillian. You’ve done all this so you can be together. He can’t speak with the cords around his neck, he doesn’t need those—”
“I only put them on because he wouldn’t listen, and I didn’t want him to try and protect you,” Anita reasoned, and let out a long exhale when the gun left his temple.
“But he wouldn’t protect me now, not now that he knows all you’ve done to show him the truth. Right?” said to Axel, trying to fight back tears.
A growl distracted them all, and Anita turned to see Bart charge into the studio and leap on her. With a snarl, he chomped down on her hand with the gun. Anita screamed in agony, and the gun went off. The shot rang off the drum, but Bart refused to let go, no matter how Anita struggled.
used the distraction to rush to Axel and unravel the cords.
“Get away from him!” Anita screamed, and Bart whined as she kicked him off.
He scampered under the piano behind . Anita pointed the gun at their four-legged protector, but refused to move. Blood dripped down Anita’s arm and her eyes were black with rage. Axel froze when she locked eyes with him. wasn’t going to let Anita take anyone else from her.
“Anita… please…” Her pleas were silenced by the sound of shattering glass, the sharp shot of the gun, and she dropped to her knees. waited for the pain, but none came. She looked up from the carpet to see Anita hunched over the piano. The keys trilled as Axel pushed her from his lap.
The door opened and she looked to the shattered studio window. Isaiah burst into the room as scrambled to her feet. She didn’t care about Isaiah looking after Anita, who’d fallen to the ground. She just wanted to get the cords off Axel’s neck.
“I’m so sorry I didn’t get here sooner. I’m so sorry,” she cried, removing the tight cords carefully.
The thin cuts caused him to hiss, and she checked him over for any other injuries, but he grabbed her and wrapped his arms around her.
“I’m okay, and I wish you hadn’t come at all. It wasn’t me she wanted to kill,” he said, holding her so tight she could barely breathe.
A team of medics followed Isaiah in.
“She has a pulse,” Isaiah told them. “The bullet clipped her shoulder. She’s bleeding, and she hit her head on the way down.”
Axel pushed the medics aside when they tried to get a look at him. Thankfully the cords hadn’t cut too deep.
“You should go to the hospital,” she said, but he shook his head.
“Not a chance.” He smirked, but his hand went to his neck, which was sure to be hurting.
The promise of treats finally got Bart out from under the piano. His teeth were bloody as he padded over to Axel and sat at his feet.
“Thank you for saving us.” crouched and rubbed his ears. If Bart hadn’t managed to get in, Isaiah could’ve arrived to find a room full of bodies.
They strapped Anita to a gurney, and a satisfied smile crept across her face as she was handcuffed to the side.
“I could have pulled the trigger at any time. You’ll never be able to move on from me. You’re alive because of me,” Anita rasped, tugging at her new chains.
“We’ll live in spite of you.” leaned in close, despite Isaiah’s warning. “You’ll spend the rest of your life in a jail cell knowing you lost everything and everyone.”
“Get her out of here,” Axel said, not even giving her a second look.
The paramedics wheeled her away as Nick and August burst into the studio.
“Olivier saw her arrive on his phone and we got here as fast as we could,” Nick said, panicked. He reached for the bump on ’s head. She winced, and he backed off.
“Sorry, we’ll follow you to the hospital,” August said, already ushering them to the door.
“We don’t need to go to the hospital,” Axel argued, holding close.
“We aren’t giving you a choice,” Nick said. “You’re both bleeding.”
“Just scrapes and bruises.” winced as she brushed her bruised ribs.
Axel kissed the side of her head. “The paramedics already looked us over, we’re fine.”
Nick and August gave up on their attempts to convince them and joined in on the group hug, suffocating her.
“We’re all going to be fine.”