Chapter Twenty-Five
Leyden locked his office door for the third time that week and leaned back against it, breathing hard.
Connor had brushed past him in the hallway twenty minutes ago. Just a simple movement, nothing unusual. His mate’s hand had trailed across Leyden’s lower back as he passed, his touch deliberate and warm through the thin fabric of Leyden’s shirt.
That same freaking touch that had sent a heat signal straight down to Leyden’s groin.
He palmed himself through his jeans, already half-hard. Again. Always. His body existed in a constant state of awareness now, hyperalert to every glance, every touch, every moment Connor looked at him with those intense green eyes – eyes that looked at him differently now, noticing things.
Unzipping his jeans with shaking hands, Leyden was circling his cock with his hand even as he was thinking, this is getting ridiculous.
Three days since he’d stood like a barely held together statue when Connor asked to see him naked…and then touched him. Three days of more touching, longer looks, and Connor’s scent was changing.
It’s not like I can help it. Connor is my mate. Leyden’s body interpreted every touch as foreplay, every look as an invitation. Leyden knew it wasn’t an invitation to anything. Connor was still figuring himself out. Leyden’s body hadn’t got the memo.
Leyden stroked himself quickly, efficiently. No romantic thoughts or filling his head with useless fantasies that might never come true. I just need a release so I can function for at least a few hours without my damn dick getting pushy.
Connor’s name was on the tip of his tongue as he climaxed.
He went through to the small washroom and cleaned up, fixing his clothes and washing his hands.
Checking his reflection he couldn’t hide the flushed face and dilated pupils.
Connor’s going to know what I’ve done the moment he sees me.
Although, as he went back to his desk Leyden reminded himself that thanks to their bond, there were no secrets between mates. Connor always knew.
/~/~/~/~/
That evening, Connor settled beside Leyden on the couch after dinner, close enough that their thighs pressed together. Leyden’s body immediately responded in it’s typical fashion. His blood headed south, and every cell of his skin prickled with awareness.
Connor didn’t seem to notice – he was just reading, scrolling book pages on his screen. Through the bond, Leyden caught flickers of contentment mixed with something else. Something that felt like curiosity edged with heat.
Leyden shifted, adjusting his position to hide his growing arousal. Stop being so damn ridiculous. They were just sitting together. There was nothing sexual about it.
The scent change was more noticeable when they sat so close together. Connor’s scent was warmer, spicoer somehow.
Connor glanced up from his screen. “You okay?”
“Fine.” The word came out rougher than intended.
Connor’s gaze dropped to Leyden’s lap, then back to his face. Understanding flickered across his features, followed by something that might have been guilt.
“I’m sorry,” Connor said quietly. “I know this is hard for you. The waiting.”
Leyden’s chest constricted. “Don’t apologize. You’re not doing anything wrong.”
“I’m touching you more. Looking at you more.” Connor’s jaw tightened. “I should’ve known it would make things more difficult for you.”
“Connor.” Leyden turned to face him fully. “I’m not complaining. What you’re doing right now, gaining confidence in touching and looking at me is everything I wanted. My body’s response isn’t your responsibility.”
Connor’s fingers tightened on his book. “But you have to deal with it. Have to take care of yourself because I’m not ready for more.”
Heat flooded Leyden’s face. “I don’t mind,” Leyden said, and he did mean it. “Taking care of myself is easy. Being with you, having you trust me enough to explore your feelings - that’s the part that matters.”
Connor searched his face. “You’re not angry? Frustrated?”
“Sexually frustrated, yeah.” Leyden managed a rueful smile. “But I’m not angry about it. I’d never be angry at you being yourself.”
“Thank you. For being patient.” Leyden’s fingers were enclosed in Connor’s hand. “Honestly, thank you.”
Leyden brought Connor’s knuckles to his lips, pressing a soft kiss there. “You’re worth waiting for.”
/~/~/~/~/
By Friday, Leyden was ready to climb the walls. There was nothing wrong in the pack. The rogues had apparently taken him at his word and disappeared, and things were quiet…safe. But Leyden was keyed up enough to fight a war single-handedly.
Connor had asked to touch him again that morning. Just his chest, hands exploring muscle and skin with growing confidence. Leyden had stood perfectly still, letting Connor do what he wanted to do, all the while his body screamed for more.
Afterward, Connor had kissed him. Sweet and slow, and then he’d gone off to run patrol checks, leaving Leyden with a cock that wouldn’t quit.
Determined to ignore his dick, Leyden retreated to the bedroom and called his mom.
“Leyden.” Catherine’s warm voice filled the line. “How are you, sweetheart?”
“I need advice.” The words tumbled out before Leyden could second-guess them. “About Connor. About... waiting. You’re the only person I could think of to call.”
Not even waiting for his mom to say anything Leyden continued, “I love him, I swear I do. And I meant everything I said about being willing to wait, about valuing our emotional connection over sex. But Mom, my body is constantly wound tight. I can barely function some days. And I feel guilty for wanting more when he’s already giving me everything he can. ”
“Oh, honey.” Catherine said softly. “You’re a normal healthy shifter. You’re allowed to feel desire for your mate.”
“But he’s trying so hard. Pushing himself to be comfortable with touch, exploring his sexuality at his own pace. And here I am, jerking off multiple times a day because I can’t handle being close to him without getting aroused.”
“Leyden James, stop that right now.”
Leyden blinked at the sudden change in his mom’s tone.
“You are not doing anything wrong,” Catherine said firmly. “Connor is your fated mate. Of course your body responds to him. That’s natural and healthy. Taking care of your physical needs privately so you don’t pressure Connor? That’s respectful and mature.”
“It feels greedy.”
“It’s biology, sweetheart. You’re an alpha shifter with a strong sex drive who’s found his mate.
Your body is going to react. The important part is what you’re doing with those reactions.
You’re handling them yourself, giving Connor space to develop his sexuality without pressure. You’re doing everything exactly right.”
Leyden’s throat tightened. “I just want him to know I’m not waiting for sex to be happy. I’m happy now. With what we have.”
“Does Connor know that?”
“I’ve told him.”
“Then trust him to believe you.” Catherine paused.
“And Leyden? This waiting, this patience you’re showing - it’s building something stronger than any quick physical connection ever could.
When you and Connor do eventually make love, it will mean more than any casual encounter you’ve ever had.
Because it will be rooted in everything you’ve developed together as a couple. ”
Leyden absorbed that, something settling in his chest.
“True love is patient,” Catherine continued. “Real love waits. And from everything you’ve told me, you and Connor are building something real. Something that will last.”
“Yeah.” Leyden’s voice came out rough. “Yeah, we are.”
“So give yourself permission to feel desire without guilt. Take care of yourself without shame. And keep being the mate Connor needs – the patient, understanding alpha you are who is willing to let him set the pace.”
“Thanks, Mom.”
“Anytime, sweetheart. I love you. And I’m so proud of the mate you’re being to Connor.”
/~/~/~/~/
That evening, Leyden found Connor in their office, checking his emails. Connor glanced up, smiled, and Leyden’s body responded predictably.
But this time, Leyden didn’t spiral into guilt.
His mother was right. Feeling desire for Connor wasn’t wrong. Managing it privately wasn’t shameful. And waiting for Connor to be ready - truly ready, not just willing out of obligation - was building something neither of them had experienced before.
A foundation. That’s what they were creating. Not just sexual chemistry, but emotional intimacy. Trust. Partnership.
When they eventually made love, it wouldn’t be because Connor felt pressured or because Leyden couldn’t wait any longer. It would be because Connor genuinely wanted it, because his attraction had developed fully through their deepening connection.
And that…that would be worth every moment of waiting.
“You’re staring,” Connor said, not looking up from his report.
“That’s usually my line. You’re worth staring at.”
Connor’s cheeks flushed, but pleasure rippled through the bond. He liked being looked at. Noticed. Desired - as long as that desire came with respect for his boundaries.
Leyden could give him that. He could want Connor desperately while still honoring his pace.
“Come here,” Connor said quietly.
Leyden crossed the room. Connor stood, stepped into Leyden’s space, and wrapped his arms around Leyden’s waist.
Just a hug. Simple physical affection.
But through the bond, Leyden felt Connor’s contentment, his growing comfort with touch, his deepening trust.
Worth it. Connor was worth every moment of waiting, every private moment of self-control, every aching second of wanting more.
Because what they were building together was going to last.