Chapter 3 Poppy
L ate August
I pace back and forth in my room. Two more hours until I need to head out. It’s four am and I can’t sleep any longer so I have already showered and tidied my small room. I can’t believe it’s already the day before the wedding. Even though I’ve been here for a few weeks and on a Florida beach before that, it still hasn’t felt like enough space, enough time to process through everything. My mom has always told me that I need my time to think before deciding. My dad is the same way and often drives her crazy, but when he does make a decision, she knows it’s exactly what he wants. Fog licks around the downtown skyline outside my window. Despite my best efforts, I can’t help imagining seeing everyone at the wedding, then mentally walking through my schedule for today, the flight, my dress, my hair.
I’ve gone over it in my head a million times. My plan is to talk with Leslie first. Assuming Leslie will be there, damn my no Honey Cove rule, Leslie loves a good piece of gossip and I’m sure has already heard and shared around her version of my story. I’m betting if I clue her in right away, she will spread it to everyone else and then I won’t have to talk to them. It’s worth a shot at least. Andi has also been talking to people in preparation for my return, so maybe things won’t be as bad as I think.
I start to pack up the few belongings I left with. It will be nice to have my closet again at least, my books, my fresh coffee beans from Bobbi’s, the boardwalk to run on, and sunrises over the water. See this is good, you’re thinking of positive things.
I try to capitalize on my mood and start to make more of a list of the things I’m looking forward to at home. My space . Although I haven’t cleaned it out yet, I’ll have to remove all traces of my previous version of my life when I get back. That won’t be fun, but I do love my little home near the ocean. At least that can wait until after the wedding. My students . My friends . My typical running routes by the beach. The warm sun on the boardwalk. Game nights with Noah. Smiling, I think about our last one before my impromptu journey and make a note to text him before I get on the plane.
You’ve got this. I am feigning confidence in my new “me” focused life, even going so far as to write down my list on the hotel notepad to reference when I need to. I have been happy on my own and think I can be at home too. Life will look different, but I feel more ready for that now.
Turning on the TV, I decide to spend my last hour watching some trashy shows before checking out and heading to the airport. I do love a trashy show.
***
I slam my keycard down on the counter significantly harder than I intended, making myself jump. “Oh my, I’m so sorry!” I smile at the worker, Sally, who has become like a friend to me my past couple weeks here in Toronto.
Crumbs bounce off her blue uniform as she smashes a donut into her mouth. Brushing some of her curly gray hairs out of her face, she leans forward and grabs my keycard.
“Oh, that’s okay, sweetie. Don’t you worry about it.” Sally has listened to all my travels, given advice on the best tourist spots, and even brought me soup after a very unfortunate food poisoning incident last week. “Are you finally heading home? You must have an early flight.” She smiles at me.
“Yeah, my best friend is getting married and I’m in the wedding. Plus, my leave is up and school will be starting soon.” Time to get used to the questions I suppose. This isn’t so bad.
“That sounds fun. Do you get to wear a fancy dress and have a cute date?” Sally asks. I wince without thinking and she notices, frowning at my sudden change in mood. I know that she doesn’t know.
“Yes, there’s a fancy dress. But no cute date for me. I’m er—newly single you could say.” I was hoping to avoid this talk with her, pay my bill, and be on my way. But I figured it would inevitably come up at some point with all of our chit chats. I’d been successful avoiding it so far by saying I was on a solo trip to explore my photography.
“Newly single? I can’t believe a beautiful young woman like you can’t find someone.” Sally gets a pass for that comment because she’s older and is usually so sweet.
“Yup, haven’t been able to nail that down yet. I was close…” I trail off and chuckle awkwardly, forcefully willing my inner monologue to stop.
“I’m happy and better on my own.” I smile at Sally again. She gives me a smirk that tells me she doesn’t believe me. Hell, I don’t know if I believe myself.
“Well, I’ll miss you and getting to see the beautiful photos you’ve taken.” She shuffles around the small counter to give me a hug of sorts, then shuffles back. “Have fun at the wedding and maybe this will be a fresh start for you.”
“Thank you Sally, enjoy your visit with your grandson. Don’t let him have the cookies from the shop down the street again though, okay?”
“I won’t! Have an amazing time at the wedding and make sure to come back to visit sometime.” Sally waves frantically at me as I shuffle out of the hotel with my large pack. Would this be a fresh start for me, even with heading back to the same life minus the guy?
I’m still not looking forward to seeing everyone again, but after my list-making this morning, I’m feeling some hints of excitement to be in Honey Cove again. If I have to face them, at least I get to do it in my fancy dress, right?