13. Chapter Thirteen
Chapter Thirteen
Now
O h. My. God. This feels so good. I never would have thought that such a small woman could have such strong hands. Oh, yeah. Right under my shoulder blade. Oh, that’s nice.
Move over, Jordyn, I think Anya might have just become my new best friend. Jordyn would probably put up a fight, but at this point, I don’t even care. Also, it pains me to say it, but I’m one-hundred percent sure Anya could take her.
The earthy smell of lavender and the rhythmic movements of the massage guide me deeper and deeper into total tranquility. She’s doing an outstanding job and will be getting a very large tip. All of my tips. Take all my money, Anya, you deserve it.
I don’t think I’ve ever felt this relaxed in my entire life. I may have come somewhat close to it once when I accidentally fell asleep in my Nan’s lap when I was nine. We had just spent an entire day pulling weeds in her backyard and when we came inside, she played with my hair until I fell asleep. I honestly think that’s the only other time I’ve even come close to this level of calm. I feel like a big loose puddle.
My new best friend maneuvers her strong, tiny hands up and down my spine in such a way that it coaxes a small, satisfied moan from my lips.
It is of course, at this moment, that I’m reminded of the very male, very present, and very naked Noah Riley lying on the massage table directly next to mine. He clears his throat.
My head whips to the side. He’s still face down in the donut-hole-face-thing and, from what I can tell, isn’t about to move anytime soon.
I watch him, waiting to see if he does or says something to embarrass me, but he just lies there quietly. Maybe he just cleared his throat for a normal bodily function reason, not because I just happened to let out a very intimate, sexual sound, while I also happen to be butt naked.
I watch as Sven works the strong contours of Noah’s back. Each muscle is carefully paid attention to and kneaded, like he’s manipulating clay. My hands start to tingle. They’re itching to replace Sven’s hands, moving and touching each part of Noah’s perfectly sculpted back. The massage oil glistens on his tan skin.
I’m losing myself in this image when I see Noah’s head gently tip to the side and look at me. His eyes are glazed over with pure relaxation.
For the first time in years, we hold each other’s stare. Lost in our past? Lost in our present? I’m not sure where we are, but we’re here together.
Suddenly, the small sheet covering my bum lifts away and Anya’s quiet, accented voice whispers, “Turn over, please.”
Noah’s heavy eyes stay locked onto mine. My entire back side is out on show for the world to see, but he doesn’t break our eye contact. I see the muscle in his jaw tick, and the muscles in his shoulders expand as he takes a deep inhale. He opens his mouth to speak, but something stops him.
Closing his eyes, he continues his deep breaths. When he opens them again, he licks his lips briefly and gives me a quick little wink before placing his face back down into the headrest.
My entire body feels charged. The hairs on my arms prickle, and my heart begins to beat out of my chest. I suddenly feel as though all the blood has left my body. I’m trying to gather my thoughts when Anya gently taps on my shoulder and repeats, “Turn over, please.”
Trying to turn from my stomach to my back on a little massage table, bare ass naked, after my muscles are all loose, is already hard. But add in the fact that I’m extremely lightheaded because Noah winked at me, then it basically becomes an extreme sport.
I feel like one of those newborn baby giraffes trying to stand up on its long, gangly legs for the first time.
At first, I try to turn too quickly, and my left leg completely misses the table and dangles off the side. Okay, then. Slow and steady seems to be the game. I can work with that.
I fumble around and struggle for what seems like an eternity, until I’m able to find a comfortable position. Anya carefully (and much too casually, in my opinion) places the sheet back on top of me. I close my eyes, trying desperately to regain my composure.
Please, almighty God above, please tell me Noah didn’t see that embarrassing show.
I chance a quick peripheral glance in his direction, and to my absolute horror, he, too, is now facing up. Shit .
He’s staring at the ceiling with the biggest fucking grin on his face. I can see his eyes have changed from calm and relaxed, to something more bright and full of wickedness.
“Sven, did you know that Mrs. Schwartz and I have known each other for almost fourteen years now?” He says merrily.
I hadn’t realized it before, but I don’t think I’ve heard Sven even say one word since we’ve been here. This is made more obvious when I feel his low gravelly voice vibrate through my chest. “Congratulations, you two. That is quite an accomplishment. Being together for fourteen years isn’t easy.” He continues kneading Noah’s calf. Noah looks at me and smirks.
Sven continues, “I would know, I’ve been married for twenty years now, and my wife drives me nuts every single day.” His booming laugh engulfs the room. “I’m only joking, you know. She’s the very best part of me. Even if she does take all the blankets every night.” He smiles. “I tell her, I say, Birgit, even though I am big man, I still get cold,” he says joyfully.
“I know what you mean, Sven.” Noah chuckles playfully, clearly enjoying this little game. “I will tell you one thing though, fourteen years now, and that was the first time I’ve ever seen her all the way naked.”
My mouth falls open in terror. He saw me. He saw me totally naked and all oily trying to shift around on a teensy tiny table. Oh, God, he saw everything . The palm of my hand finds my forehead, and Anya gently taps my thigh, hinting at me to put it back down on the table.
Sven’s deep roaring laughter fills the spa. “You are very funny, Mr. Schwartz! I tell you, look at her naked all that you can while she is so young and pretty! My Birgit is very beautiful in her old age, but there is nothing like a woman in her, what’s the word? In her prime, you say? You look and look and enjoy it while you can.”
“Oh, I plan to. Since I’ve finally seen her in all her glory, I personally cannot wait until she gets to see me naked. Fourteen years is too long a time to wait, don’t you think, Sven?”
A chuckle escapes my lips, despite the complete embarrassment coursing through my body. I hate how funny he is, even when I’m the butt of the joke. I wish I could ignore him, I wish I could block him out and…Anya moves to my calves and she starts a mind-numbing deep tissue massage on them. That helps. That helps push the thoughts of Noah out of my mind.
I focus on Anya’s mighty little hands as she continues to release all the tension from the different parts of my body. The knots in my neck, the tightness in my jaw. It feels so good to finally give in, to let myself surrender.
I honestly can’t tell if Sven and Anya are buying the poor charade of us being married, or if we’ve already been found out. As they finish up our massages, neither of them gives anything away.
As Anya gathers her things, she quietly says, “You two have the room to yourselves for the next forty-five minutes. You may choose to use it as you wish. Some couples lay in their separate beds while holding hands, some choose to lay together, or you’re also welcome to move yourselves to the private shower in the adjoining bathroom. I hope you both feel a renewed sense of love and passion in your…marriage.” She smiles warmly, then shuts the door. Anya knows.
The only sound I hear is the pounding of my heartbeat in my ears. What do we do now? Do I get up? Does he get up? Do we play rock paper scissors and decide who gets up that way?
I can tell you with one-hundred percent certainty that I will not be the first one to stand up. I will not chance him seeing me without my clothes on ever again.
I tap my fingers on my thigh, anxiously playing an invisible piano. I know only a few minutes have passed, but it feels like hours. The silence is unbearable.
Time painfully stretches on with neither one of us making a move to get up. I feel myself trying to use mind powers to will him to stand up. Come on, Noah, please get up first. Just turn your body away from mine and stand up. Just move, damn it.
Nothing. Absolutely nothing happens.
I shift in my bed, take a deep breath, and recenter myself. Okay, then, I will calmly just wait until he moves first. No matter how long it takes. I will not break. Seconds tick by with no movement. Maybe he fell asleep? I let out a huff, hoping he’ll be startled awake, or maybe he’ll finally get the point and start the process of getting out of here. The huff does nothing. He doesn’t move a muscle. More time passes with no movement at all, so I decide to loudly clear my throat.
“The ball’s in your court, Robins. I can do this all day.”
I look over and see him resting his arms comfortably behind his head as he gazes happily at the ceiling.
“Ugh, why do I have to be the one to get up first? It makes much more sense if you get up before me, and then leave the room while I get changed. That’s the gentlemanly thing to do, right?” I stare at him waiting for his rebuttal, but none comes. “Noah, honest question, do you even know what it means to be a gentleman?”
“Jane, I was taught that gentlemen always let ladies go first.”
He’s impossible. Fucking impossible. “Fine,” I say gruffly. “Close your eyes and face the other wall.” I watch and wait until I see him roll his eyes dramatically and comply with my demands.
I grab the light sheet covering my body and wrap it tightly around myself as I stand up. I peek over my shoulder and see that he’s still facing the other direction. Good. I quickly put on my super special spa slippers and walk into the bathroom.
Along the far wall are two cubbies where we left our clothes before we started the massage. I go to my cubby and start to put on my panties when I gaze longingly at the stunning spa shower in the corner.
The floor is tiled with river rocks and beautiful stone benches line both sides of the walls. I can count a total of five different showerheads at various heights, pointing different directions, and I also spot some dried eucalyptus hanging from a hook. I can feel it calling my name, beckoning me inside.
There are only two problems. Problem number one is that there’s no curtain or even a door to this shower. It’s floor-to-ceiling glass, with a small opening that you walk through. Open concept. Very Scandinavian.
This brings me to problem number two, it’s a man-sized problem who could/probably would walk into this bathroom at any moment and see me.
I tiptoe to the edge of the massage room and crane my neck around the corner to see if Noah is still lying there, and I’m pleasantly surprised to see that he is. It doesn’t look like he’s moved at all. I don’t think I have much time though, so I quietly retrace my steps back into the bathroom and yell from my spot at the cubbies. “I decided I’m going to take a quick shower. Don’t you dare come in here. Seriously, Noah. Don’t even think about it.”
I start the water before I hear a reply. It quickly hits temperature, and I can smell the eucalyptus coming alive. Right as I’m about to step in, I hear a slight chuckle coming from the massage room.
“Me thinks the lady doth protest too much.” Shakespeare? Since when does he quote Shakespeare? “But it’s okay. Don’t you worry, Jane, I won’t bother you. It’s not like I haven’t seen you naked already today anyway.”
What an asshole. “What did you say? Sorry, I can’t hear you over the sounds of the heavenly bliss waiting for me.”
“Oh, good, then I guess you can’t hear me when I tell you Sven told me those stone benches are heated.”
I lift my foot and set it on the bench closest to me. Holy shit, he’s right. What kind of magical sorcery is this? I sit my perpetually cold bum onto the heated stone and let the warm water envelop my skin. This is perfect.
To my astonishment, Noah didn’t even bother me once while I was showering. There was no peeking, no funny quips about seeing me naked, and no pushing for me to hurry it along. Also, there was no more Shakespeare, so I’ll take that as a win too.
As I dry myself off with the fluffiest towel, I bring it up to my face and breathe in the warm vanilla scent. Man, I feel good. Like a whole new woman.
I put on my clothes and reach up to the mirror to wipe away the steam with my hand. It has taken me years to like what I see in my reflection, but I have truly grown to love the woman who’s staring back at me.
It took me until I was a full-blown adult to really understand that beauty looks different on everybody. I know, I know, we’ve been spoonfed the lines, “Everyone is different, everyone is beautiful,” since we were in elementary school, but let’s be honest, no one really believes it until we get older–or at least I didn’t.
Standing barefoot in the spa bathroom, I hold my gaze in the mirror, my big, blue eyes that I got from my Nan staring back at me. I love my long, blonde hair that has a slight wave to it when it’s wet, the light brown freckles that dust the bridge of my nose, and the small scar above my eyebrow I got from an intense game of beer pong in college. All things that, at one point, I desperately wanted to change, but now are the things I hold most dear.
Grabbing my bag, I put on my sandals and walk back into the massage room. Noah is lying on his side fast asleep on his massage table, his hand resting under his head. He almost looks sweet when he’s sleeping. But alas, I’m no fool and know that there’s a brooding jackass simmering just below the surface.
I move closer to his table and listen to his soft breathing. This man holds the trophy for the only person in the world who has ever been able to get under my skin.
The only person who has ever challenged my thinking and made me question my own stubborn opinions. He has this power to enrage me and, annoyingly, turn me on all at the same time. It’s confusing and frankly, I don’t have time for it.
It took me an embarrassingly long amount of time to get over him in the past, and it’s so frustrating that he gets to walk back into my life and mess things up again.
Here I am, staring down at a peacefully sleeping Noah Riley with furrowed brows and an angry look on my face, when tiny Anya peeks her little head in to tell us our time is up.
From the look on her face, I’m positive I look like a homicidal maniac who’s contemplating the murder of her sleeping husband.
I turn toward Anya, and she peers at me with narrowed eyes that are practically screaming, I knew it! I subconsciously put my hands up in surrender. “Hi! Yes! We will…um… be out in just a minute…my…husband…is sleeping, and I was just about to wake him up.” I bring my right hand down and slap him in the chest.
“Ouch, what the hell, Robins?” He gets up and rests his body on his elbow. “What was that for?” He rubs the sleep from his eyes and looks at me standing next to the bed, my hands weirdly up in the air, and an awkward smile plastered on my face. He furrows his brow in obvious confusion, so I nudge my head in the direction of the door. As soon as he spots Anya, he sits up and dons his most charming and charismatic smile.
“Hi, Anya!” He clears his throat. “My, uh, wife and I were just about to get out of here. Sorry, we took a bit longer, I was just so relaxed I fell asleep. We’ll just need an extra minute or two for me to get dressed, and then we will head out.” He stands up and wraps the sheet around his lower half and tucks the corner in. It rests low on his hips, those perfect V lines on his abdomen are just begging to be touched. What? No. Definitely not. I shake my head. This is the exact reason I need to stay away from him.
Anya’s eyes dip for a brief second as she, too, traces the V lines that disappear deep into Noah’s makeshift toga. She catches me watching her and instantly recovers. “It’s okay. No problem. Just leave the sheets on the beds when you leave.” If I wasn’t already watching her, I would have missed it, but I see her eyes dart quickly to Noah’s body once more before turning and softly closing the door.
“Anya thinks you’re hot,” is the only thing I manage to say as the door closes.
“Does she?” he says nonchalantly as he turns to make his way into the bathroom. Just as he reaches the door, he drops the sheet to the ground, and I catch a glimpse of his perfect ass.
My cheeks flush, and I turn away. Facing the wall behind me, I act as though I’m admiring the various spa stock images framed on the wall. Oh, what pretty rocks. That’s a beautiful creek. What an interesting flower…
Just then, Noah appears to my side already fully dressed.
“That was fast,” I mutter, pulling my purse up higher on my shoulder.
“Yep. I didn’t have one of those amazingly blissful showers that I was hearing so much about. I seemed to have run out of time for that.”
“That’s a shame. You really missed out,” I say, patting his back.
We both move toward the door in sync. It’s little things like this that make me so upset. It’s like, somehow, we’re always on the same wavelength. Making all the same moves, being at all the same places, liking the same things. Statistically speaking, it doesn’t even make sense, but yet, here we are again.
“What are you going to do for the rest of the night?”
His question catches me off guard. “Um…not sure. Probably just go back to my room and sleep some more.” I laugh nervously. “I don’t remember a time when I haven’t had any work to do, so I’m living it up while I can. Why? What are you going to do?”
“Eh, I’m going to grab some dinner, and then head back to my room to get some work done. Unfortunately, I’m not in the same boat as you. I have a lot of work to do tonight and tomorrow, so I’m afraid that means no rest for me.” He reaches for the door again and opens it for me. “Do you want to come grab a quick bite with me before you…sleep?”
I've never claimed to have a poker face and judging by his reaction to whatever my face is currently doing, it proves that I most definitely do not have one. “Woah, don’t be so offended, Jane, it’s just an invitation. I know you said we should stick to ourselves and stay far away from each other or whatever, but I thought that since we just spent the whole afternoon together, and the fact that I saw you naked twice today…” TWICE?! “I thought maybe you’d want to just finish the night off strong, and then resume our six-foot social distancing order tomorrow.”
Noah has work to do, but I don’t? I don’t understand this at all. Have the partners asked him to do something special? Or maybe Dumont called and gave Noah a few tasks? I feel my anxiety start to take hold of me. My thoughts begin to spiral.
I have to get back up to my room and check my emails to see if I have work that needs done. I don’t want to drop the ball with this client. I don’t want the partners or Mr. Dumont to think I’m lazy or that I’m not up to the task. I don’t want Noah put in charge of this account. I’m a damn good attorney, and I need to make sure that everyone knows it.
Walking through the door that he’s so graciously holding open for me, I start walking down the hall, speaking quickly. “No. Sorry. I can’t come to dinner. I um…I totally forgot, until you mentioned it, that I have a ton of work to do tonight too. I’m just going to order some room service and buckle down.” I pick up my pace. “Besides, Noah, I really do think it’s best if we steer clear from each other for the rest of our time here. You do you, and I’ll do me. Remember?” My words come out choppy through my quickened breaths. I don’t even look over my shoulder to see if he follows.