Chapter 51
51
CRYSTAL
I didn’t see Gemma at work on the Monday or Tuesday, her first days back. She hadn’t come to meet me at the normal place, by the lifts, at our usual lunch time and I decided it would probably not be in my best interests to call her extension, or go to her office. She probably needed time away from me, to calm down: I understood that, understood that I’d made yet another serious mistake, that I’d worried her, frightened her, when she’d found Poppy missing and that it was going to take time for her to forgive me.
On the Wednesday, I wondered about going to her house after work. I’d realised I’d left my yellow shirt and some knickers there – in a way, I couldn’t have blamed Gemma if she’d burnt them. But perhaps I could use them as an excuse… I could just call to collect my clothes, and say I didn’t expect to go in, and probably she’d relent and invite me in anyway.
But what if she didn’t? What if she was still so furious with me that she just slammed the door in my face?
If it hadn’t been for the fact I was going to see Evie at the weekend, I don’t think I’d have managed to get through the week without going round there. As it was, I had to stop myself twice from driving over straight from work, by literally going around a roundabout twice, trying to make a decision, before turning back on myself and going home. I missed Poppy in a way I couldn’t even describe. Like I’d had an arm cut off or lost the use of one of my feet. But if I’d gone to the house only to be told to stay away and never come back… well, I couldn’t imagine how I’d have been able to cope with that. So I’d wait. Just for another few days, until I’d been to see Evie. That, at least, was keeping me going, for now.