46. Chapter Forty-seven
Chapter Forty-seven
Summer
Heaviness sits in the center of my chest as I stand in front of the high-security prison where my father is. I haven’t bothered to make an appearance, unable to face the man who nearly shattered my well-being.
The thought of all the crimes that the men stuck here have committed sends a shiver down my spine. This building holds nothing but darkness. It stands tall, almost like a fortress of stone, surrounded by high fences topped with spiraling coils of razor wire.
My breath hitches in my throat, fear clogging my pores. I take a deep breath to settle my insides, but dread washes over me as I walk through the metal gate entrance. A vivid replay of one of my favorite childhood memories makes an appearance, and I let my mind take me back to that place.
***
It’s my sixth birthday. The sun shines bright, and the cool fall breeze pricks my skin, creating goosebumps as Mom and Dad blindfold me. Mom holds my hand, guiding me out the front door. She makes sure I don’t trip over myself like I do all the time. My skinned knees prove just how clumsy I am.
The sound of the garage doors slides upward, and I stand, eagerly waiting to see my big surprise.
Mom and Dad always surprise me with something on my birthday. It’s been a yearly tradition my whole life. From what I could remember of it, anyway.
It feels like an eternity, waiting for Dad to give me the okay to pull off the blindfolds. I hop in place, still holding Mom’s hand.
“OK, princess,” Dad begins. “You can take them off now.”
I skip in place with excitement, rip the tie-dye bandana off my face, and drop it onto the ground.
My mouth falls open. I look up at Mom with big eyes. A smile spreading wider than the Atlantic Ocean. Then I look at Dad.
He waves his arm toward a big, wrapped present sitting in the center of the clean garage. “Come on now.”
I leap in place and sprint to it, bringing my hands out and tugging off the wrapping paper. The crinkling echoes off the walls of the garage.
My eyes widen more as I stare at the pink Barbie bike adored with a big purple bow. My heart races with excitement, and I jump into Dad’s arm, giving him a big bear hug. I repeat the process with Mom.
“Can I ride it?” I ask, my two little feet leaping in place.
Dad smiles and nods. “Of course you can. Go take it for a spin.” He winks.
I screech, leaping again in the air. Dad pulls the end of the bow, untying it. I don’t waste a second. I swing my leg over, straddling the bike. My excitement slowly faded. My confidence is vanishing.
I have never ridden a bike without training wheels, and the feeling of falling off has me hesitant.
I look at Dad. “I’m scared.”
He gives a soft smile. “Don’t be.”
“But what if I fall?”
Dad crouches down to my level, putting my helmet on and buckling it. He places a hand on my shoulder and looks me in the eyes. “You can do it, Summer. Remember, you are the tiger.”
Mom places a hand on my other shoulder. “We’ll be here to support you every step of the way.”
I smile, keeping the words in mind, and kick up the kickstand.
“I’m the tiger,” I whisper to myself.
It takes me a few tries to learn my balance, but then I get the hang of it and am halfway down the driveway. I pedal and pedal to my heart’s desire. All my worries fade away as I focus mainly on my balance. Mom and Dad cheer behind me, but I remember that Dad told me never to look back when I was learning how to ride a bike, even with training wheels. So, I don’t look back.
A sense of independence mixes with the wind against my face, and laughter bubbles in my belly. When I reach the corner of our street, I turn around and pedal my way back, placing my foot on the ground to help stop the bike.
I quickly get off the bike, toss my helmet onto the ground, and jump in place. “I did it! I did it!”
“I always knew you could. We’re so proud of you,” Dad praises me.
***
I wipe the warm tear that sneaks down my cheek away and take a deep breath.
“I am the tiger,” I whisper as I walk through the metal detectors. Fear continues to eat at my insides.
The prison is dark and cold. Everything is gray and made of steel. Lifeless. It speaks the mind of the evil within. Guards surround the area. They walk back and forth with guns strapped to their belts. I can’t stop myself from focusing on them, pushing the thought of my father holding the cold metal against my back out of my head.
My body shakes as I stand in place, clueless about what I’m even doing here. I should go back home. My father doesn’t want to see me. If he had, he would’ve called me.
Before I manage to turn around and go home, a guard comes up to me. His black hair and strong frame cause me to tense.
“Ma’am, do you need help?”
I swallow the vile that threatens to come up. “Y-yes. Raleigh. 305. I’m… I’m his daughter. He should be expecting me.”
His lips press together in a tight line; two small creases form on the corner of his lips. He nods. “Right this way.”
I follow him down a long hallway. He swipes his card to unlock the door. I jump from the sudden loud beep before it swings open. Bile continues to rise to my throat, and my body weakens as I see my father sitting behind the bulletproof glass. Two guards stand close behind him. His hands are cuffed just as they were at the courthouse. I slowly sit, hoping my fear isn’t too noticeable from the outside. I grab the phone to my left and watch as he does the same.
“Hello, Dad.”
He chuckles. “You sure have guts to be showing up here. It was made clear that you don’t give a flying fuck about your father. Leaving me here. This is all your fault.”
I look down, thinking of what Alec told me when I brought up the idea of coming here… “He’s going to do everything he can to antagonize you. Don’t let him.”
“What? Have nothing to say to your good old man? You know how embarrassing it is that my little girl is the reason I’m locked behind these bars?”
I’m having a mental battle with my lip that’s threatening to quiver and break.
I’m the tiger, I remind myself.
I release a breath. “You don’t get to torment me. You have lost your right to sit here and try to bring me down like you do to everyone else around you. You are a miserable old bastard who lost his soul the day I was shipped off to college. Mom knew it. I learned it. You’re nothing but a lifeless murderer.” I half-laugh. “And to think, I wanted to come check on you. Let you know that your daughter got into the best college in New York.”
The smug expression he holds so well fades, and I shake my head in disbelief.
“Yeah. That’s right, Dad. I did it. On my own, too,” I blink back the tears that form behind my lids and brush my hair out of my face. My chin tries to wobble, leaving me sucking in oxygen and holding my breath for a second. “I’m going to become a detective, Dad, and I will fight to the end of this Earth to put every human like you behind bars.”
Dad stares at me for a long while before his eyes start to fill up with tears. “Princess,” he whispers through the phone he’s holding. “You got in? My little girl got into her dream college.” I watch the tears slip down his cheek. Not a single feeling of remorse spread through me. “I’m so proud of you.”
I listen as he goes on, sobbing behind the glass as if he’s the one who lost something.
All this time… since I’ve been home, he’s done nothing but bring me down. Everything he’s done to me was out of anger. He put me down, abused me, and ruined the lives of two innocent people. I shake my head. This man doesn’t deserve to be happy for me. He doesn’t deserve a life full of light. He deserves to sit here behind these bars and rot for eternity.
My lips pinch together, anger slowly coating my skin as I inhale through my mouth and blow out my nose.
“I’m not your little girl anymore.” I hang up the phone, rise, and head out of the prison without looking back. I stand taller, with more pride than I have ever felt in the past two years.
And I never look back.