Chapter Fifteen
I knock on Merrick’s front door. I need someone from my old life to talk to.
My parents are blowing up my phone, and Marc is being obnoxious too.
I don’t know how to deal with them, nor how I feel about Merlin.
About his show of kissing me in front of Drew, his ownership of what we have going on.
I want him so much, but is it too soon? Will he have had enough of me after we’ve been to bed?
Marc, in a particularly mean mood, said I was like a limp fish in bed.
“Hi, Trent, this is a nice surprise. I thought you’d be down at the nursery with Merlin. Drew says you’ve been helping out a lot. It sounds like hard work.” Merrick steps aside and lets me pass him. “Willow’s sleeping. She’s been full steam ahead since before six this morning.”
“Rather you than me, mate.” I follow him through to the kitchen, where he flicks the switch on the kettle.
“How are you enjoying your time here? You seem to be busy all the time. I thought this was supposed to be a holiday.”
I bite the corner of my lip. I want to talk things through with Merrick.
He knows Merlin. They’re good friends. “It’s good.
Just getting away from all the demands placed on me from everyone feels like a weight lifted off my shoulders.
Not that it’s stopped them from calling constantly. I’m not ready to talk to them.”
“What about Merlin? You seem to be getting on well together. Is there something there? I mean, he’s gorgeous. Anyone with eyes can see that. He’s also a solid guy. I’ve never seen him so interested in anyone. He’s got the hots for you, mate.”
I sigh and close my eyes for a moment. Here goes nothing.
“I like him, like totally ‘oh my god like him’. But I think it might be too early to take it all the way. God, listen to me. I sound like one of my year eleven students. He’s coming to me this afternoon or probably more like evening.
He’ll want to shower, which is a shame because I’d like to lick every inch of his muscled skin. ”
Merrick bursts out laughing. “You should have seen the way I stared at Drew when he was working on the house. I was a testosterone-fuelled idiot. Seriously, Trent, I think Merlin’s just as hooked as you.
You’ve told me he knows about dickhead Marc, and honestly, Merlin is the total opposite.
He wants you, Trent. No one else. So go for it, have fun, enjoy each other, and see what happens.
You may just have a summer fling, but make sure that’s all he’s looking for. Don’t leave him broken-hearted.”
“If anything, I think it will be the other way around. He’s got heartbreak written all over him.”
“But if you don’t try, you’ll never know if you’ve missed out on the real thing, the greatest love of your life.”
I let out another long breath. “He’s coming over tonight. He’s bringing dinner, and I want him to stay the night. But how do I ask him? It’s not like I can call him and ask him to bring his toothbrush.”
Merrick’s lips quirk up as he tries not to laugh.
I know he’s not aiming it at me. “Is this the real reason you’re here?
Oh, Trent, sweetie. You’re so overthinking this.
Trust me, Merlin wants to be with you. The only thing you need to do is have a great evening together.
You’ve done this before. You’ve already had time alone with him.
Just enjoy his company and whatever comes with it.
He’s not the type to push you to do something you don’t want or are not ready for. He’s not Marc, not one bit.”
“I know that, but I’ve not had much experience in anything. I can’t flirt. I’ve let Marc control all the social parts of my life for so long. Even when we weren’t together, he wanted to know where I was and who with.”
“I never knew he was that bad. I didn’t like him. He was a flash twat who spent far too much time talking about himself.”
I smile. “Yeah, that’s him.”
Merrick turns serious again. “Trent, Merlin likes you. Just you. You don’t need to flirt or dress or act the way you think he wants.
You’ve spent time with him. Relax, enjoy the food and his company, and see what happens.
There’s no rule book. Good people come in all shapes and sizes.
Look at me and Drew. I would never have imagined I’d find another man who’s so right for me, and absolutely not one who looked like him.
But he’s my person. You deserve to find yours. ”
Merrick’s words make sense. I do overthink everything.
I like Merlin, like the way he smiles at me, the way his eyes sparkle when I’ve said something he thinks is funny.
His laugh and how he runs his hands through his hair when he’s frustrated.
I want more. I want a reason to stay, and he could be that reason.
“Thank you, Merrick. I needed to hear that.”
“You’re welcome. If I haven’t said to you, I’m so glad you’re here. I’ve missed you.”
Just then, a sleepy Willow stumbles into the kitchen. Her eyes light up when she sees me, and my heart swells with a love I didn’t know existed. “Unca Twent!”
I scoop her up and hug her. She wraps her little arms around my neck and puts a kiss on my cheek. “Hello, Miss Willow. You look lovely today.”
“My know,” she says confidently as she smooths down her dress. Merrick chuckles at his daughter’s precocious attitude.
I spend a little more time playing with Willow, then say my goodbye and go home, Merrick’s words of encouragement fresh in my head. All I have to do is be myself.
Even though I knew it was coming, the knock on the door startles me.
I quickly look around to make sure everything is all neat and tidy.
I know it is, but nervousness still flows through me.
As I pull the door open, Merlin greets me with an easy-going smile on his tanned face. My heart beats faster.
“Good evening, sweetheart.” His soft drawl warms my skin the same way the sun kisses my face early morning, gentle and soft. “I’m sorry if I’m a little late. The traffic was bad getting back into the town.” He steps through the doorway and bends his head to brush a kiss on my mouth.
He has two packed grocery bags, one in each hand.
It looks like he’s brought enough to feed us both for a week.
The idea of us locking ourselves away for a few days and learning all about each other and lots and lots of other things—naughty, naked, roll-around-in-bed-getting-sticky-and-sweaty sort of things—pops into my head.
When I move around him to close the door, he stops me with a nudge of his elbow.
“Where have you just disappeared to? You’re blushing, and while I’m a great fan of that, I’m wondering if I need an explanation.” The sexy half smile that lifts the corner of his mouth lets a dimple pop on his cheek. Damn him. I’m going to be a gooey panting mess before we’ve even eaten.
“Um, nothing. I-I was just thinking if you’d left any food in the supermarket for anyone else,” I stutter. “Do you want to put it all in the kitchen?”
He nods, but the shrewd look in his eyes tells me he has seen right through me. “How ready to eat are you? I made the mistake of grocery shopping when hungry. Which is why I’ve bought so much.”
My stomach growls as I take one of the bags from him. “Guilty as charged.” I chuckle. “I’ve got the table outside set up if you want to eat there.”
I open a bottle, pour the deep red wine into two glasses, and hand him one.
He takes a sip and nods appreciatively. Between us, we load platters with cheese, olives, and cold meats, and carry them out into the warm summer evening.
After we set the wine and the bread on the packed table, I sit opposite Merlin.
We both pile our plates with food and tuck in.
The conversation slows down as we crunch on crispy bread slathered in butter and cheese.
He’s watching me over the rim of his glass.
“What? Why are you looking at me like that?”
I expect him to give me a brushed-off reply, but he places his glass on the table and takes my hand.
“I was thinking about the way we fit together and the way we move. We should be awkward, jostling each other. But we’re not.
We’re synchronised like we’ve been doing it forever.
That’s what I’m looking for—forever. Finding this place was a dream come true, even more so with the land for the nursery.
I could be pushing all this on you, but I want it even more with you. ”
Can I be open with him, tell him my dreams and what I hope for my future?
That if I can get my head in the game and start to seriously work on my art and get it up on Etsy, on my own website, I might not have to go back to teaching.
Selling some of my artwork would be nice.
I know there’s a market for this kind of erotic paintings and drawings.
The homoerotic pictures I draw match any of the already high-profile artists. But I’m not sure I can.
I need to take a breath and be brave, make the most of tonight. Here. Now. With him.