TWELVE
STILL FIXATED ON the phone, the brush of fingertips on her hip broke her daze. Something about the feel of them, how they took their time gliding around her hip then tightened, with delicate but sure possession, closed her eyes.
That wasn’t a threat.
That was Baer.
Switching her phone into her other hand, her fingers joined his, threading between them, caressing them deep. As she stood straight, she guided them up her stomach, through her cleavage, onto her opposite cheek.
Rubbing her face against his palm, she leaned on his solid body, grateful to have him in her life, even if it was only for a limited time.
“Little Skit,” he murmured above her head.
“God, it’s so wrong,” she whispered, tasting the words more than she heard them. “It’s wrong to want you like this.” Insistent in her redirection, she forced him to cup her breast rather than her face. Squeezing his fingers with hers, her coerced fondling fired more guilt. “I’m sorry.”
Dropping her hand, she expected his to loosen immediately. It didn’t. Instead, he tucked his fingers into the fabric covering her breast to caress her skin to skin.
“You can’t touch me like this,” she whispered. Oh, but she wanted it, this and so much more. Her tormented clit heated and tingled as he squeezed her nipple between his strong fingers. “You shouldn’t want to—”
He pinched her so hard that a quake of almost climax shot through her. On a yelp, her body bucked back against his. Her phone dropped from her slack fingers, but she didn’t care, nothing except him mattered.
Proving that, eager to progress, she slid a hand up his thigh, intending to go higher until he caught her wrist and pressed her palm flat on his leg. He bent down, burying his mouth in her hair, resting his head on her shoulder, pushing his face into the side of her neck.
“Tell me to stop,” he mumbled, teeth grazing her, something pained about the request. “Say I’m an asshole who has no right to put his hands on you… Tell me, Lil’… Tell me to fuck off.”
“I can’t,” she gasped, fighting to keep her volume low. “I can’t say it. I can’t say it when I’m so desperate to beg you to fuck me.” Grabbing her arms, he jerked her around to face him, picking her up to perch her on the back of the bench. Steadying herself, she planted her hands on his chest. “I know we can’t. I know you’re working, and I know…” Talk about pained. No words were harder to say than these. “I know after you go home with Hol tonight, we can’t ever do this again.”
“I won’t.” He shook her. “Complimentary dates don’t include sex, and if Donoghue tries to touch you—”
“I don’t want sex,” she said, statement matching her paperwork. Except the documentation didn’t reveal the whole, honest truth. “Not from him.”
“You didn’t write preferences; I’m not on your schedule.”
He’d found the best and quickest way to remind her this was a terrible idea. The only way she’d ever have this man deeper between her thighs, embedded in her, was if she paid for the privilege.
“Baer…” she said, trying to push him away.
He didn’t budge. “No.” Blocking her way, he held her on the top of the bench. “How long is your trip?”
“Two weeks,” she said. The serious line of his brow matched the movement of his jaw. “Baer, I—”
“There’s no man I trust to go with you. Seeing Don’s hands on you tonight—”
“Baer, what is this about?” she asked, stroking his chest in an attempt to soothe. “You were wound up in the car, and you’re tense now. Something’s upsetting you and I don’t know what it is. Talk to me, baby.”
Grabbing her hand, he squeezed her fingers, raising them to his mouth. “Why did the white rose upset you?”
“My mother loved white roses. They were her favorite. At the funeral… they were everywhere. Seeing them always takes me right back there. It’s nothing, it shouldn’t be a big deal.”
“Goddamn,” he exhaled.
“What? If you love them, I’ll figure it out, I—”
“No, I… that’s not it.” That’s not it, but he didn’t tell her what it was. “I’m sorry about your mom, your parents, I… I didn’t know.”
“It’s okay,” she said, more worried about him than herself. “Why would you? I didn’t know about yours. Your father told me last night. Baer, if there’s anything you ne—”
“Don’t pick Donoghue.” He squeezed her hand tighter. Usually Baer was so together, so smooth. Seeing him frazzled wasn’t fun. “Promise me you won’t, Lil’.”
“I promise. I’ll pick whoever you recommend. It doesn’t matter to me. I only came to Squires because Holly wanted a partner in crime, so to speak…”
Some of his agitation eased as he considered her. “You didn’t tell me about the money… Why would a beautiful, rich, amazing woman like you ever be anywhere near Squires? Why aren’t you married ten times over?”
“Fewer men notice the beautiful, amazing part compared to those who notice the rich part… My grandfather calls men who pursue me leeches. Not necessarily because they’re not good enough for me, but because they see my generosity, and my access to Truman’s bank balance, before they see anything else… He says I’ve never brought a man home he believes values me the way I should be valued. I don’t know, I think it’s just a cover because he doesn’t want to think about me having sex… Yeah, he’s biased, but most of the time, he’s right. Usually, as I fall for a guy, I figure out he was only in it for the money… Makes it difficult, you know, to trust people. So… I eventually gave up trying.”
“Until you met Chapman,” he said. “Did you love him?”
“I don’t know.” She sagged against him. “Maybe I thought I did… But that is a much bigger conversation than we can shoehorn in here.”
Easing him back, she slid onto her feet.
Putting a hand on the bench on either side of her, he blocked her in. “You told him we were sleeping together.”
Frowning, her head tilted. “Who?”
“Chapman,” he said. “At the hospital. You said all you were to me was a pussy to pump any time I could bend you over and make you take it.”
“You were listening in?” she asked, socking his chest and growling at him. “I knew you were. Damnit, Baer, don’t eavesdrop, it’s rude.”
Scooping a hand onto her face, he brushed her hair away with his thumb. “You could never be that to me, Lil’ Skit.”
“I know what I am to you,” she said, losing the battle of pushing his hand down. “Actually, no, that’s a lie, I don’t know what I am to you, but I know what I’m not. I am not your client. Holly is your client.”
“You know I won’t sleep with her.”
“I don’t know that,” she said. His free hand tried to sneak onto the other side of her face. “It’s your job to sleep with her. You’ll be paid to sleep with her. A lot probably. She picked you because that’s what she wants from you: sex.”
“That doesn’t matter. I won’t. We’re allowed to refuse any job. There’s no law that says we’re required to take a certain client.”
Even if there was, would he obey it? Not like those in his line of work didn’t mind bending the rules.
“Why would you do that?” she asked, surrendering to his hands holding her face.
“Because she’s your family,” he said, bending to trace his mouth over the corner of hers. “And because I couldn’t do it.”
“I’m sure you’ve been with women who are less attractive than Holly,” she said, not buying for a second that being intimate with Holly would be a hardship. “She’s beautiful and smart… and sexy.”
“That’s not what I meant, I… Last night, I couldn’t do it.”
What? She leaned back to get a better look at him. “What?”
“I satisfied the client, I always do, I don’t think she noticed that I wasn’t… you know… I used my hands on her, my tongue—”
“Oh, Baer, please, I don’t want to know this,” she said, squirming in his hold.
He wouldn’t release her. “I didn’t have sex with her, Frey. And I’m not saying I won’t with other women. It’s my job, you’re right about that. And this is… Well… I don’t know what this is. But walking out on you last night… going to another woman’s bed when all I wanted to do was take you upstairs to mine, it… I don’t know, but we’ve gotta figure this out, Lil’, before you ruin me.”
Financially? Emotionally? Again, he wasn’t specific. Either was a possibility. “You have to support your family, I would never ask you not to.”
“I would never be able to make you that promise.”
This was unexpected, yet, at the same time, overdue. “I don’t understand. Surely there must have been other women. Women you cared about… personally, while you’ve been in this profession.”
He shook his head. “Not like this… With the boys, and my mom, the money, it’s been keeping our head above water. I haven’t had time for…”
“And Claire bailed when things got tough,” she said, provoking a frown. Sheepish, she shrugged. “Your family like to talk.”
“Not usually this much,” he said. “Anything they didn’t tell you?”
Taking his hand in hers, she got space enough to lean back to retrieve her phone from the bench where it had fallen. “Let’s go get a drink and I’ll fill you in.”
They’d been away from the table for so long that Holly and Donoghue might believe they’d been ditched. Until…
Uh, no, they got back to the table and found the two engaged in animated conversation.
That was okay. In fact, it was a relief.
Sitting at the opposite side of the booth with Baer, she got her wish of nestling under his arm. They spent the evening covering the topics his family clued her in on the previous night and then some.
Telling him about her grandfather and the foundation, getting it all out there was a relief, a joy. The noise of the bar provided cover to talk without worrying about anyone overhearing.
At the end of the night, while Baer went to pay the bill with her card and Donoghue used the restroom, she and Holly cleared up the table.
“I think you’ve made your choice,” Holly said, putting the used napkins on a plate.
“My choice?”
“But listen…” Holly said. “Can you please not abandon me, okay? I’m happy for you and everything. I don’t even mind you stealing my man. No one could mind; you two have chemistry up the yazoo. It’s like watching magic in real life. But I still have two more dates, so will you please just pretend like you’re not sure who you’ll pick and come with me on those dates?”
“Holly, I was never going to—”
“Obviously, you two will have no trouble convincing my folks you’re a thing. You better work overtime to help me with my guy, if we don’t have the same… you know,” Holly said and thrust her shoulders back to tease. “Don’t ever tell me this wasn’t fun. You didn’t even want to be here and now look, you’ve found the goddamn love of your life.”
The curtain moved and Donoghue came in with Baer just behind him.
“Ready to leave, ladies?” Donoghue asked.
Getting back to the car was a blur. The love of her life? Baer couldn’t be the love of her life… could he? More thinking made the immediate problem clearer.
She needed a companion for the vacation and wedding events. Baer needed money. Whatever was going on between them might cause him financial problems if he kept avoiding going all the way with clients.
Freya hadn’t wanted to hire Baer because she feared falling for him while he was working. But she wasn’t just a client anymore, it wasn’t just an act. There was something real between them. Given she was going away and in need of support, who else would she want with her? No man would be better for the job.
And, going away for two weeks, with another man, while Baer stayed in the city to work… other women. It would be a nightmare. Neither of them would be themselves. Was this the solution to all their problems, or an action they’d come to regret?