14. Isaac
14
ISAAC
That… happened.
Holy fuck, that happened.
All I can do is stare at the ceiling and try to catch my breath.
That was probably the hardest I've ever come in my life, and then Tyler just… Fucking painted me like a Jackson Pollock.
If he hadn't just milked me for all I was worth and wrung me out, I'm ninety-nine percent positive I would have come again.
As my breaths slow, I become aware of how quiet it is. When I'm able to lift my head to look down, Tyler is sitting at the end of the bed with his knees to his chest and a hand covering his face.
"I am so sorry," he says, the words slow and deliberate. "I didn't—I didn't mean to?—"
"Tyler, come here," I say, patting the bed next to me and trying not to laugh. He doesn't move. "I need you to come down here because I'm incapable of movement. My legs are jelly, and honestly, my brain is a little mushy too, so go easy on me."
He chuckles a little at that and crawls into the space beside me. I pull him closer, so his head is on my chest. We're quiet for a long time. I'm still trying to get my faculties back, but I also want him to have a moment to process. It's pretty clear he's not ready to start the conversation, so I go first.
"I have never come that hard in my life."
Tyler snorts. "Yeah, okay."
"I'm not kidding. I think I might have died a little. That scream you heard was my spirit leaving my body. It hasn't completely returned yet."
His body shakes with laughter, and I pull him closer, kissing him on the head.
"So, I could be mistaken, but just moments after I levitated outside my own consciousness, did you, um…"
Tyler groans and tries to cover his face, but I reach around and hold his chin, angling his face up so I can look at him. His eyes flash, the dim light reflecting dark blue pools of arousal. He might be embarrassed, but he liked that. A lot. Maybe more than even I did.
"I couldn't help it."
Goddamn, he sounds so small and unsure of himself. I hate it, but I also find it stupidly endearing and kind of want to infantilize him a little, wrap him up and kiss him and tell him he's precious.
Yeah, my brain is mush.
"I couldn't either. It was really fucking hot."
His entire body relaxes, breath leaving him in a whoosh. "I mean, as hot as premature ejaculation can be, I guess."
"Whether it was intentional or not, it's okay to like what you like. But for the record, I liked it too. A lot."
He laughs again. "It was probably the sexiest thing I've ever seen," he admits. "I was looking at your, uh–" He clears his throat, and I can feel the heat from his blush on my chest. "I was thinking about what it would feel like inside you, and then I had this mental image of my cum dripping out, and I just kind of…" One hand comes up to his head and he mimes an explosion.
"Goddamn," I groan. "I've never?—"
"We don't have to do it!" he exclaims quickly. "It was just a weird brain malfunction."
Tightening my arm around him, I continue my thought. "I've never done that before, but I'm not sure I've ever been more turned on by an idea in my life."
"Really? Even though we're not…You've mentioned before that you don't really do relationships, and you haven’t had unprotected sex because of that."
"I also said I would get tested again for you if that was something you wanted," I point out. "But also… Are we not technically in a relationship?"
"What?"
"I mean, I'm not suggesting that we're gonna get married or anything like that, but we've been spending twenty-four hours a day with each other for the past week and a half and I'm not tired of you yet. There's definitely attraction here, and I think we have a mutual respect for each other. I'm not sleeping with anyone else, and I don't think you are. We could agree to keep it that way for as long as we're a… thing . And just see how it goes?"
Am I coming on too strong? I don't know how not to, though. I have too many thoughts, too many feelings, and not enough brain cells to process them all.
"You want to be in a relationship? With me?" I'm not sure what to make of his incredulous tone.
"I like you, Tyler. And I think you like me, too. Whatever you want to call it, I want to keep doing this with you."
"I really did suck your brains out through your dick, didn't I?"
A laugh explodes out of me. "Just you wait, the first sign of life below the belt, and it's your turn."
"Might be a while," he says. "That was intense."
A while turns out to be the next morning in the shower, but he's in a hurry. He has to stop by his apartment before he heads to school, and he wants to be there early to discuss his project with the professor. I'm really tempted to play with him while he's dabbing concealer around his bruises, but I behave myself. Meanwhile, I'm staring at his ass and making plans for it later.
* * *
It's too quiet without Tyler here. Or maybe empty is a better description, since he's not particularly loud. I'm the loud one, constantly running my power tools.
How is it that I've been absolutely fine here on my own for this long, but I spend less than two weeks with this guy and I'm lost without him already? I'm going to need to rein in the neediness before I chase him away. Who even am I?
My phone pings, and I get unreasonably hopeful that it's Tyler before I remember he barely ever turns his phone on. I guess to avoid his father. My blood pressure rises when I see its Anders.
Anders: the building behind me has cameras too and uses the same service we do. request is in, it will take a couple days to get the footage.
Me: thank you
I hope he's wrong, but the more I think about it, the more sense it makes. I've spent hours trying to remember any little detail of what I saw that I could take back to the police. But whenever I try to look back and focus on the details, I keep seeing blond hair and a grey pea coat, and I'm not sure if that's actually what I saw, or if my brain is filling in gaps. I can't even remember what I told the cops. All of my attention was, and still is, focused on Tyler. Even before I knew it was him in that alley, he was my only focus. I had to make sure he was alive, had to get him some help, had to be there when he woke up so I could see with my own two eyes that he was okay.
This is only the second time I've spent more than a few hours away from him since that day. I recognize that I'm forming an attachment, and that it might not be healthy or have the healthiest origins. But having him here settles me for multiple reasons. The most pressing being that I can’t be convinced he's not in danger if I don't see proof otherwise.
If his date— Guy —was the one to hurt him, why isn't Tyler turning him in? Why did he lie to the police about it? Why is he covering for him, making excuses, and still lying about it now?
Why is he lying to me about it? And does it change anything between us if he is?