Chapter 5
LOCKE
I was so stupid.
As if I needed to be back at this hospital.
I should have been in the middle of the Atlantic by now. Maine was calling.
The water was calling.
Liar. This is where you’re supposed to be.
I paced the hallway in front of the elevator of the ICU floor, ignoring the annoying voice.
It hadn’t shut up through the night. In fact, Milligan had been loud as fuck all night. Dreams of his blood between my fingers. Her blood overflowing and running even thicker.
Darker.
Almost like syrup. But it kept pumping around my hands as if there was a never-ending supply.
Even though I knew that was a lie. Milligan certainly hadn’t had enough to keep him here.
But she had. I had the text from Stone to prove it.
I looked down at my shaking hand, almost expecting it there. Nothing but calluses and a cut down the side from leaping off my boat.
I didn’t even realize it happened.
I curled my fingers tight until my hand stopped shaking.
A commotion at the end of the hall dented my panic. I crept down the hall, my heart pounding as I noticed the crowd of people where her room was.
Priscilla.
Cilla.
Her jagged voice lived in my head almost as loud as Milligan’s.
I didn’t realize I was jogging down the hall until I was upon them. Stone and his partner ripping into the cop on the door.
A flurry of nurses pushing their way inside even as Stone tried to stop them.
“What’s going on?”
Stone turned, his face morphing from anger to an unreadable mask.
“What’s wrong?” I asked again.
“It’s none of your concern, Mr. Jordan.”
I whirled to his partner’s cool, clipped voice. I wanted to snarl that she was wrong, but she wasn’t.
Priscilla didn’t mean anything to me.
Liar.
I gnashed my teeth together. That time I wasn’t sure the voice was Milligan’s or my own.
“Back up.” Detective Diaz crowded into me. She was wearing another one of her blazers even in the oppressive humidity, but this time it was shoved up her arms. Her weapon showing—on purpose.
I stood my ground, but didn’t press forward. “Is she okay?”
Her dark eyes flared with anger before going flat. I knew that gaze.
I had one of my own.
Where you slammed down the emotions for the sake of the business at hand.
I couldn’t seem to find my own barriers just then.
“You need to go,” she said and turned away from me and stalked back into the chaos outside her room. I tried to push forward, but Stone redirected me into the waiting room.
“What the hell is happening, Stone?”
“Someone broke into Miss Barlow’s room.”
“Didn’t you have a cop on the door?”
Stone looked down at his regulation shoes. “He had to take a bathroom break and then one of the patients coded and the nurses were distracted.”
“What the actual fuck? Does your partner think it’s more than just a sick sex crime now?”
Stone’s jaw flexed, but he said nothing.
“No?”
“It’s not that simple.”
I paced away from him and slammed my fist into the vending machine.
The anger raged and bubbled under the surface.
All I could remember was her small frame in that bed. The monitors and anemic light over her bed made her seem impossibly frail. I knew this godforsaken life wasn’t fair and could take people at a whim.
Not her.
I shut my eyes and reined the anger back in. This was why I lived on my damn boat.
I wasn’t fit for anyone.
Why Dom, my boss, had cut me loose.
After Milligan had been killed, the anger living inside me had no outlet other than my fists or my gun.
I blew out a slow breath, then dragged in a long, deep one until my chest filled to bursting before I let it out again. “Did he hurt her?”
“No. Not for lack of trying.”
“What does that mean?” I whirled back to face him.
Stone’s impassive face and shuttered eyes matched his partner’s. ”She’s alive.”
“Did he hurt her?” I said slowly with a near growl between each word.
“He used the cord of one of the machine’s to try and strangle her.”
“Fucking Christ.” I paced away from him. “How did she...” I couldn’t ask the question. All I could see was her on the pier with that heavy rope around her throat.
“She’s a fighter and made enough sound for the cop on the door to come back in. The nurses were dealing with someone coding in the next room. Chancey, the cop on the door, has a concussion. He’s down in the ER now.”
I swallowed down the flood of acid that burned my throat and coated my mouth. “Will the officer be all right?”
“Yeah, but he barely caught a glimpse when the intruder slammed an IV pole into the side of his head.”
“Jesus.” I raked my fingers through my hair. “And Diaz doesn’t believe this is bigger than a simple attack?”
The first crack of annoyance showed as Stone used his thumb to crack his knuckles along one hand. ”Could be anyone trying to get rid of a witness.”
“But you don’t think so.”
He didn’t say a damn thing, which was just as good as saying yes as far as I was concerned.
This woman wasn’t my problem. If the cops knew she was in trouble, they would protect her.
“The wit is the only one who’s seen this guy. I need to talk to her. I tried earlier, but she had a panic attack. I was coming back before I had to go on shift to see if I could try again and...”
“And found out this piece of shit came back to try to finish her off. Unbelievable.” I stalked away, then back trying to push down the anger. The smells and sounds of the hospital adding to my agitation.
Stone cracked his knuckles. “I’m going to check on her.”
I followed him out the door to the hall where there were now a half dozen cops.
It looked as if Diaz was already getting her ass chewed by someone who looked higher up the food chain.
He wore a dress shirt with the sleeves rolled up.
A gun harness held his weapon in plain sight.
He was a solid dude but a little soft in the middle.
Hairline hanging on for dear life in a thin sandy color dipping into gray.
Stone swore under his breath.
“Captain?” I asked under my breath.
“Lieutenant. Just as bad.” Stone straightened his shoulders. “Miranda, can I talk to you for a minute?”
The lieutenant dipped his hand into his pocket and the jangle of change made my shoulders tighten. “Looking to take another step down to traffic, Stone?”
“No, Lu. I’m just checking to see if this fits my—”
“Look, Stone. I know you want to make a name for yourself, but you should stick to fiction. It ain’t there.”
Stone stiffened. “It’s the same guy. He’s escalating. I’m sure of it.”
“This was just finish off the witness.”
The callous way he spoke about her made my shoulders tighten. Like she was more of an inconvenience than anything.
“How many perps do you know who would have the balls to do this with a cop on the door?” I asked evenly.
His lieutenant didn’t have an answer for that.
Instead, the dickhead just turned away from me, he and Diaz walking away with heated whispers.
I wanted to believe they might come around to Stone’s side, but the lieutenant had already made his mind up about this whole scenario.
How the fuck could these cops be so stupid? If it wasn’t a serial offender, he was more likely to skip town than to come after her again. This behavior didn’t line up. I knew obsession could drive a man to do insane things, but that was generally attached to more intimate partner violence.
Stone’s theory made way more sense based on this behavior.
I scanned the area, my instincts back online as the anger abated. A pair of officers covered the hallway near the elevators and the staircase. The nurses were still diligently working in the room across from Cilla’s. A flurry of nurses and doctors rushed in. Whoever it was, it didn’t look good.
But the chaos spilled out into the hallway. The lieutenant was leaning into an epic dressing down for Stone and Diaz. The cop on the door was distracted by the scene, allowing me to get through the door.
“I just need to see her.”
The cop grabbed me by the collar and tried to haul me back, but I was a good twenty pounds heavier and five inches taller than him. It weas enough for me to get a look at her in the bed. Her neck was ravaged and bruised, her nails torn. She was resting, but her brow was furrowed.
Dreams?
Nightmares?
Rage rose up as the cop and Stone hauled me out of there.
“What were you thinking?” Stone said darkly.
I shoved him back and stalked down the hall to the elevators. I needed air.
After living on a boat for the last year, the hospital was even more claustrophobic. Too many people, too many sounds. Too much death and blood.
I blocked out the memories. The last time I’d been in one had been to find out Milligan’s wife hadn’t made it either. I’d lost both of them—fucked up everything because I hadn’t been fast enough. Smart enough.
I needed to get gone.
Priscilla was alive and that would have to be enough for me.
I was tainted anyway. Nothing I did would help her at this point.
You know that’s a lie.
I hunched my shoulders at Milligan’s voice in my head.
What did he know? I killed him too.
I burst out the sliding doors into the heavy night air. Humidity had soared over the water and stayed with its heavy summer blanket. But it wasn’t a hospital.
Even if my T-shirt immediately stuck to my back as I practically ran around the path to the parking lot.
I’d unearthed my dirt bike from the storage hull.
It worked better for tooling around the Caribbean islands.
Not exactly the best for a real city, but I wasn’t locked into worrying about a fucking share ride.
My palms itched and I scrubbed them down my jeans.
“Jordan!”
I hunched my shoulders and kept moving toward my bike.
“Hold up.”
“It was a mistake to come out here, Stone. You’re right.”
His heavy footfalls gained ground as he met me at the parking spot. “Just wait.”
“What?” I whirled around. “Because I’m about five seconds from going through that hallway swinging. She was supposed to be safe with you people.”
I shouldn’t care.
It wasn’t my job to care, goddammit.
But seeing how battered she’d been had driven me to my damn knees.
Another cord around her neck.
Another moment she could have been lost.
Not my problem.
Not my problem.
She needs you.
I fisted my hands at my sides. I threw my leg over the bike and flicked up the kickstand. She didn’t need me. I was a fuckup and screwed up everything I touched.
“Jordan, I can’t protect her. I’ve been busted down to a fucking beat cop. They won’t let me protect her. We don’t have the budget for round-the-clock protection, nor will my captain give it.”
“Even after that?”
“Even after today. We can watch her until she’s out of the hospital, but after that all they could offer was a drive by patrol.
It’s not like I have a safehouse for her for fuck’s sake.
She’s not even from around here. I don’t have jurisdiction in New York even if I could get her there. She has no one.”
“What the hell do you think I can do?”
“What you were trained for. What else are you doing?”
Nothing. Which is why you’re going to protect her.
I shook off Milligan’s voice. “I’m a stranger. You think she’s just going to get on my boat?”
“If we explain to her that she’d be safe there until I can figure out what to do.”
“And you were ready to write me off after talking to Leo. Now it’s cool?”
“Now, I don’t have fucking options.” Stone’s eyes flashed with anger and desperation.
“This is insane.” I gripped my handlebars until my arms shook. “You don’t even know me.”
“Putting her in a shitty hotel and watching her off shift isn’t going to fly for very long. She needs protecting and you know how to do it.”
“I don’t. Not anymore. You talked to Leo. He knows exactly what I am right now. Fucked-up and not fit for service.”
Not that Leo Kendrick had said that out loud. But he’d sure as fuck written it in my file when he’d recommended me to take leave. It had been ten months and twelve days since I’d felt Milligan bleed out under my hands. I wasn’t any more stable than I was that night.
“He said you were one of his best.”
My gaze swung to Stone. “Liar.”
“I’m serious. Do you think I’d be asking you to do this if I didn’t vet you? Kendrick said you excelled in security, hand-to-hand, research, and you’d be a damn good detective if you ever decided to leave The Kendrick Group.”
I slammed my eyes shut. The fuck he did.
Maybe once upon a time, but not now.
Not after I fucked up so spectacularly.
You didn’t fuck up. I did.
I shut out the voice. Maybe I was really cracking up on the boat alone for so long. Is that why I was hearing my best friend’s voice in my head? As if that was a good plan for protecting this woman.
“I can afford to put her up for a few weeks, but I work four days on, three off. I can’t cover her when I’m working a twelve-hour shift.”
“Dammit, Stone. How can your captain turn her loose with that guy going after her in the hospital?”
“He and Miranda both think that if she goes back to New York she’ll be fine.”
“And you don’t?”
“I’m not willing to find out. And I’m hoping that with some more time she’ll be able to talk about this guy.”
Great.
So we’ll both be basket cases. Sounds like a great time will be had by all.
“You don’t know if she’ll even go for it.”
“I don’t.” Stone crossed his arms over chest. “But she needs time to rest and recover. She’ll be safer with you, and I’ll tell her that.”
“Fuck. You know my boat isn’t that big right?”
“But it’s on the water. He can’t get to her.”
I blew out a breath. “Do you think he’ll try again?”
He nodded. “I’ll give you my files. Everything I put together about this guy, and you can make a decision.”
My brain itched to look through it all. “Sure your boss will be good with that?”
“No. I don’t fucking care. I’m tired of finding dead girls in my city. Maybe a second set of eyes will actually be a good thing.” Before I could open my mouth he stepped closer to me. “I know you were a Ranger. Even fucked-up with whatever you went through, she’ll be safer than without you.”
“Low blow.”
“I’m just speaking truth. Maybe you can even tap your boss to look into it. Maybe he isn’t just doing this in Salem.”
“I don’t have access to—”
“You sure about that? Your boss said he’s been waiting for you to come back. He’s been waiting you out.”
Bullshit.
Leo wouldn’t have volunteered that. He was a cagey son of a bitch.
“Let me bring the files to you. Then you can make a decision. My lieutenant won’t let you near her tonight, but we can keep her in the ICU for one more night. I’m not sure if she’s ready to be discharged yet, but I can guarantee the hospital won’t want her kind of disruption there for long.”
I nodded curtly. “I’ll be at my boat.”
The relief was apparent and made me even angrier. Instead of dealing with it, I took off.
I wished I’d never seen Priscilla Barlow.
Then she’d be dead.
I opened the throttle to drown out Milligan’s voice.
Even though I knew he was right.