35. Chapter 35
I ndolence.
I rolled the word over my tongue with a smile as I stretched, feeling a shiver run down my spine. The luxuriously soft sheets caressed my skin as I slowly opened my eyes, only to frown at the unfamiliar surroundings; I couldn’t see much, with only a sliver of daylight escaping the heavy drapes over the windows. For a moment, I thought it must still be night, but it didn’t take long to realise it was the sombre décor of the room that darkened it.
Above my head, the ceiling was painted with a mural depicting a scene from what must be the artist’s idea of the underworld—a desolate landscape with monsters dominating the scene, their eyes replaced with gemstones that gave them an eerie semblance of life. When I turned my head to the side, I noticed black and silver curtains on the bed. They were luxurious but surprisingly lifeless, and the posts they framed were carved into strangely contorted female forms.
‘Vel be damned, the owner of this room must have a lot of nightmares sleeping here,’ I said, sitting up to lean on my elbows. In response to my outburst, a shadow rose from one of the chairs, and I instinctively reached for the aether, muttering a spell that formed a shield in front of me.
‘There is no need for that, Ani,’ Alaric said, stepping forward. ‘And yes, I have nightmares, but not because of the décor,’ he added, approaching the window to pull the curtains open.
At the sudden influx of light, I winced, closing my eyes, but not before noticing that Ari was almost naked, with only a pair of loose silken trousers riding low on his hips. At that, I opened my eyes slightly, shamelessly wanting to admire the view. His long white hair, unbound and flowing freely to the middle of his back, captured my attention, and I bit my lip in appreciation.
‘What happened?’ I asked, trying to distract myself from looking at him like he was an oasis in the middle of a desert. ‘Did you bring me here?’
I vaguely remembered Ari picking me up at one point; I must have fallen asleep after helping in the infirmary. I lifted the covers, noticing I was in a similar state of undress, with only a white chemise covering my otherwise exposed body.
‘You were so deeply asleep you didn’t even stir as I carried you to the castle. My magic was so depleted that I was defenceless. I selfishly wanted to keep you close—just this once—and laid you to sleep here in my room. I asked Agnes to undress you. I promise nothing else happened,’ he said, noticing my concerned frown.
‘Come to bed. It is still early.’ I patted the bedding. Alaric’s resolve was crumbling if he’d admitted me into his sanctuary. He didn’t even allow servants here. It was my turn to grasp the opportunity to be close to him.
‘Annika, I can’t. There are things you need to know.’
He seemed so distant that I reached out my hand, hoping he would take it. ‘Then tell me. The man who takes the time to make me smile, tease me, and challenge me? I want him back. The world is falling apart around us, and I’m afraid and uncertain, but there is one thing that I am certain of. I want you.’
As the last word left my lips, Alaric moved. With inhuman speed, he captured my hands, pinning them above my head and caging me beneath his powerful body. ‘You slept so peacefully, and I held back. I looked at you, wanting you, knowing I could never deserve you. I’ve done so many questionable things. I forced Orm to use your geas and forbade him from telling you. I wanted to use you as a weapon. To Anchor you and gain the power to destroy the Lich King. There was never any hope of repairing the keystone. I lied to Orm, and I lied to you,’ he rasped.
‘The man you are talking about … doesn’t exist. I did all of that to make you trust me, to make you want to bond with me. I knew it was wrong, and I still did it. All to rid myself of my damn curse. Then you stood up to me, refusing to bend to my will. You defended me in front of the envoy. Gods , woman. You trusted me. You let me touch you, and your magic soothed my pain while your heart eased my torment. I’m a monster …’
‘Ari? Shut up and kiss me.’
He looked at me in shocked disbelief, his gaze lingering on my face as he tried to assess my true intentions. ‘Didn’t you hear a word I said? I’m a liar, an evil necromancer who will only cause you pain …’
I couldn’t bear the anguish in Ari’s voice, so I silenced him with a tender kiss. His stunned expression lasted longer than I expected, but once he’d gathered his wits, my dark fae leaned into the kiss, testing my resolve. Moments later, my hands were free and clasped behind Ari’s neck, pulling him closer.
As soon as we came up for breath, Alaric looked into my eyes, stroking a gentle finger across my lips. ‘Why are you doing this?’ he asked in whispered awe, his hands not once leaving my skin.
‘Because despite the incredible strain you’ve been under, you have integrity. Whatever your plans were, you never went through with them. You stopped because of me, choosing to suffer through your curse rather than betray my trust. You may see a liar when you look in the mirror, but I see a tormented man who told me the truth, sacrificing himself in exchange. I don’t need a pure heart. I need a man who would burn the world for me, and you, Alaric’va Shen’ra, are such a man. I claim you. You are mine.’
I scraped my nails over his marks. The guttural moan that Ari made sent shivers down my spine. His body shook with raw need, his touch growing more insistent, and when he kissed me this time, his tongue explored my mouth with a passion that I couldn’t help responding to. I didn’t care about the world anymore. I wanted this man, his bright mind, his magic. I craved it all, and my body reacted in the most primal way.
My hand trailed over the hard muscles of Ari’s abdomen, threatening to disappear under the soft fabric of his trousers before he stopped me. ‘Ani, I will do whatever you want, but I cannot Anchor you, not right now. You said you had to feel ready to accept me, but now I am the one who cannot accept you. Hrae! I want you so much, but I cannot do it.’
There was a finality in his words, but it couldn’t disguise the desire in his voice. I knew he felt he didn’t deserve me, but I refused to let his despair take this moment away from us.
‘Ari, I understand. I would welcome you as my Anchor, but this isn’t about magic. I can’t let you wallow in the guilt of your deception so let me give you what you need. Redemption through the pain you enjoy so much. Will you accept the agony of my touch and be mine?’
He shuddered under my scrutiny. In some strange way, I understood him. Alaric was a good man, but deep inside, he was a broken soul overcome with a guilt that he felt he needed to atone for.
‘I … Yes,’ he breathed. Despite his hesitation, I saw the flicker of something in his eyes and felt the press of the bulge in his trousers. He was aroused by the mere suggestion of my offer.
‘Release me, Alaric.’ As Ari took a breath, I could see the struggle he was under, but he fell back. My smile turned almost vicious as I followed, pushing him back until he fell, helplessly staring into my eyes. The hand I laid on my prey’s chest was open and gentle, but as I maintained eye contact, my fingers curled. I pressed my nails into his flesh, drawing them down over the marks of his curse, scoring his flesh.
Ari cried out in response, and my lips moved, calling on magic. With a twist of my wrist, I released my power, forcing it into his body, and his outcry became a moan. I slid my other hand down a hairsbreadth above the delicious muscles of his abdomen, watching them tense and shiver as he strained for a single touch until I stopped over his cock.
Ari’s back arched in desperate yearning, but I laughed and moved my hand away. ‘Kneel,’ I said, and his response was instant.
‘Yes, Domina,’ he breathed, and I gasped at hearing the dark fae term of endearment.
‘Good, now you understand.’ I bent forward to kiss him.
I teased Alaric with tenderness, feeling his reaction before releasing lightning from my fingertips. The flash as it arced to his body made him flinch, but I deepened the kiss to swallow his scream. Another gesture and the magic disappeared. I didn’t stop there, though.
As Ari gasped in relief, my teeth bit down on his lip and blood flowed over my tongue. When his eyes flew open in surprise, I deepened the kiss and nicked my tongue on his fangs. It hurt, but when my blood mixed with Ari’s and flowed over his tongue, I felt him almost melt in ecstasy. When I drew back to end the kiss, Alaric pushed forward, his magic blossoming and surrounding us, trying to keep me close.
The slap I delivered to his cheek rocked him backwards, and as he swayed, I grabbed his throat with uncompromising strength. The response was immediate, my dark fae lover freezing beneath my hand. I had no means of physically overpowering him; he was stronger and had proved to be a much better mage. Yet, at the very core of his existence, he was dark fae, and their men never disobeyed their domina. I was walking blindly into the role, but his voluntary surrender flooded me with arousal.
‘What do you want, Alaric?’ I asked, almost purring at the hunger I saw in his eyes.
‘You, my Domina, I want to follow your every command and please you in any way I can.’ His voice was so hoarse and filled with desire that I gestured for him to rise. He was fully erect and as beautiful as the gods themselves. With a gesture, my magic blew across his trousers and the material unravelled, falling to the ground. I grasped the base of his exposed cock and gave it a harsh tug.
‘Like this?’ I asked, already knowing the answer.
‘Yes, my … Harder …’ he stuttered into silence as I knelt down and took his length into my mouth, sucking so hard my cheeks hollowed. ‘Dark Mother! Annika, please,’ he cried as I continued to move my hand and mouth. He was mine, and I wouldn’t let this end with such simple pleasure. I felt Alaric’s fingers tangle in my hair, but after savouring the salty liquid gathering on the tip of his cock, I stopped.
‘Ani!’ My name was a guttural half-growled protest from a man at the end of his tether, and I chuckled, giving him one last lick with the tip of my tongue. ‘I promised to make you suffer,’ I purred with a wicked smile, and he grabbed the nearest bedpost, panting heavily and looking like a wounded animal.
‘You are a cruel mistress, Annika. Beautiful, but cruel. Gods, you’re fucking perfect.’
I teased my magic into wrapping around Ari without him noticing. Then I muttered a short cantrip and the aether solidified, turning into thorny vines that pierced his skin with thousands of tiny needles.
‘Tell me all your secrets. If you want to taste me, to take a bite, you will tell me all the dark, vile thoughts you are harbouring.’ I moved to the middle of the bed and slowly spread my legs, letting him see everything as he stood there powerless.
Alaric’s eyes were pure crimson, his breath ragged as he struggled against the magical restraints. ‘I want Orm to join us in bed. I want us all to be together. I want to feel him fucking me while I feast on your cunt.’
I gasped, surprised at Ari’s confession, my mouth falling open at the image his words painted in my mind. I had been with two men before; Tal and Arno liked to share my affections, but they never touched each other intentionally. I wasn’t sure if Orm would even agree, but as my power surged, almost Anchoring Alaric without me uttering the oath, I realised how much I’d love it.
Alaric noticed my surprise, and I caught his vulnerable expression before he looked away. I wanted to slap myself for making him doubt me. ‘No?’ he asked, refusing to look me in the eye, but I wiggled my finger at him, dropping the restraints.
‘Yes, but only if Orm agrees.’
Ari stalked towards me until I stopped him with a push of my foot to his face. This time, however, it seemed my wily fae was done following my orders. He took my foot and planted a kiss on the ankle, then another and another, moving up and caressing my skin. I bit my lip before asking the question I needed the answer to.
‘Was that the reason you pulled away? Because you wanted us both?’
‘No. I stayed away because my mother’s curse connects me to the Lich King. He speaks to my mind, and he wants you, Ani. I made a blood oath to not pursue Anchoring you until I’m free of him. He may kill me, but I will never give you to him.’
I gaped, my skin suddenly freezing under his touch. Alaric raised his head and looked me in the eye. He was so bitter, so resigned to his fate that he must have assumed that would be the last straw; that I would reject him.
My powerful, broken fae. Little did he know how much he meant to me.
The Lich King could fuck himself if he thought I’d let him have my necromancer.
‘Now you know why I can’t Anchor you. I won’t subject you to his influence, his voice …’ Ari pulled away, but I stopped him.
‘I understand, but this changes nothing for me. Come to me, my darkness. Show me how much you want to be mine.’ I crooked a finger, leaning back. Alaric’s eyes widened before he gulped and gave in to my siren’s call.
He seemed to flow forward as his lips trailed over my calf and thigh, and as his lips parted, I felt the edge of his fangs tease my skin. I shivered and whimpered, then moaned as he kissed my sex. I slid my hands downward, but as Ari’s tongue slid through my folds, my back arched, and I grasped the sheets instead.
‘My sweet, cruel Domina. I’ve waited so long for those words,’ he murmured, feasting on my body, and I fell back onto the pillows, giving my wicked lover free rein.
Ari’s hands were gentle, and the cool touch of his fingers added to my excitement, especially when his thumb brushed over my pearl. I whimpered again and the sound seemed to please him because Alaric redoubled his efforts, enticing a stream of delightful responses until I felt my body tense in anticipation of the upcoming release. ‘Stop,’ I commanded as I fought for control of my body and the magic that so wanted to take him.
He did, but when Alaric looked at me, there was nothing gentle left in his gaze. Those burning, crimson eyes looked at me with the inhuman gaze of the elder races. He looked feral, and I gestured him closer. Ari glided forward with predatory intent, and I couldn’t look away. As the soft caress of his silken hair brushed over my body, I reached up and captured Ari’s lips, pulling him into my embrace. The press of his shaft to my entrance made my eyes flutter closed, and I couldn’t help rubbing myself all over his cock.
‘I need you,’ he said through the clenched teeth.
‘Then take what you need,’ I challenged, using my nails to pull him closer, and he pushed forward, breaching my entrance.
The room became bathed in crimson light as Alaric’s curse lit up, his teeth bared in a tortured grimace. I bit Ari’s chest, feral in my need to protect my lover, as he drove his cock into me over and over again. Perspiration covered his body, his breathing uneven as he drove me wild with his harsh, punishing pace. My conduit magic wrapped itself around us, the aether dancing to my heartbeat as I felt my pleasure cresting.
‘I love you,’ he cried out, his body tensing in approaching climax.
‘I forgive you,’ I whispered.
I pushed my magic away before pleasure overwhelmed all thought. Alaric groaned and I felt his release filling me while I held him tight, floating on waves of bliss. He collapsed, his head resting on my chest while I stroked his silver skin.
‘I can’t accept it … your forgiveness,’ he said after a few moments, but I heard the hope in his voice. He craved pain because he thought he deserved nothing else, and I barely held back my tears, realising his spirit was even more broken than mine.
‘You have to if you want my love, but that’s the last time you hide something important from me. I believe it was fate and not your deception that brought us all together. You saved me from an empty life locked in grief. I love you, Ari. I love you, my beautiful fae.’
I embraced him, stroking the white strands of his hair. The man who had always held his head high and faced the world with a sardonic smile just buried his head in the crook of my neck, a silent sob shaking his body. He held me as if his life depended on it. And maybe, in a way, it did … because I doubted even Orm knew the pain he kept inside. I held him for a while, and when he raised his head, I saw something that had been missing from his face for too long.
Hope .
‘Rest a little longer,’ he said, stroking my cheek with a smile. ‘I will send someone with breakfast, and once you are ready, I would like you to come to Orm’s office. He needs to know what’s happened between us, and I want us to tell him about it together.’
My answering smile faltered when the door to Ari’s quarters burst open. Alaric threw himself in front of me, shielding me from the sudden intrusion. Orm strode in, his face thunderous, only to stumble to a halt when he caught sight of me peeking out from behind Alaric’s naked body.
‘Ari, please leave us.’ I looked at the dark fae calmly, and to my relief, he didn’t argue.
‘Call me if this overbearing idiot gets to be too annoying,’ he said before grabbing a robe from the chair and, with an uncertain smile, walked towards the door. When he passed Orm, he bowed his head. ‘With your permission, Commander.’ There was too much sarcasm in his voice to take his words seriously.
As the door closed quietly behind Ari, Orm frowned before turning back to me. We stared at each other, and the silence weighed on my nerves so much that before I knew it, my temper exploded. ‘If you stormed in here to give me a lecture or express your jealousy, think again because I won’t take it kindly.’
‘Did you Anchor him?’ Orm asked, worry etched on his face. My face must have given away my confusion because his next words were not what I was expecting. ‘Oh, you thought I was jealous? I told you—I’ve accepted your feelings for him, but I won’t accept him putting you in harm’s way.’
‘I didn’t. We made love, but he stopped me from going further.’
Orm’s eyes opened so wide I nearly laughed. ‘You stormed in here like a savage because you thought I Anchored him? Ari was worried it would expose me to the Lich King’s influence. I agree with him. Besides, in the state he’s in, his spirit would likely refuse anyway, and we both know how that would end, but you should have told me about his oath and … what exactly did he swear?’
Orm sat down beside me. ‘I was worried. I … I felt your pleasure, only for a moment, but I knew you were with him. Ari swore he wouldn’t pursue the Anchor bond as long as he’s cursed. Nothing else, nothing permanent. It is just a precaution … I made a fool of myself,’ he said, taking my hand and looking at me with a strange expression. ‘How was it … with him?’ he asked before shaking his head and grumbling under his breath. ‘No, forget it. I shouldn’t ask …’
I place a hand on Orm’s cheek, forcing him to look at me. ‘It was amazing, but so different from what we have. Ari is a male of the dark fae. He likes me to be dominant, even a little cruel, and I never thought I would, but I like it, too.’
Orm gazed into my eyes for a long moment before his lips curled into a contented smile. ‘I’m not giving you much chance to be dominant in bed, am I? Maybe it’s good he can give you what I can’t.’
I chuckled. ‘No, you aren’t, but I wouldn’t have it any other way,’ I said, embracing him. I wasn’t happy about this blood oath, but I understood their reasons, and I admired Orm for adjusting to our ever-changing bond. ‘Give me a moment, and I’ll meet you down at the landing field.’
The Anchor bond flared to life as I kissed him, and I felt his emotions wrapping around me like a comforting blanket. Orm was confused and uncertain, but he wasn’t jealous, and I couldn’t help but smile, intending to show him just how much I appreciated his new attitude.