Chapter 8
Chapter
Eight
Britta
I t’s just another day, I told myself as I headed toward my first class.
I scoffed out loud, glad that the long hall leading to the School of Engineering was not yet filled with other cadets. “You’ve always been a crap liar, even to yourself.”
If it was any old day, my stomach wouldn’t be in a knot, and I wouldn’t be going over Kann’s questionable advice in my head.
Kann.
Nothing had happened in The Stacks, I reassured myself. Nothing. Then why did I feel like a kid who narrowly escaped getting caught with her hand in the cookie jar?
I replayed Kann’s tips in my head. Nothing had been provocative or even ground-breaking, which made me think that there might not be any real skill to attracting guys, after all. Did I really believe that a twisty walk and running my fingers through my hair while making eye contact would make Zav go weak at the knees?
I thought about the serious Taori. Doubtful.
I ran my fingers along the cool stone of the corridor wall as I walked and let the unyielding rock ground me. Despite my traitorous heartbeat and ragged breath, I had nothing to regret and nothing to explain because nothing had happened. I brushed aside the memory of locking eyes with Kann and the frisson of heat I’d felt between us.
I’d imagined it. Just like I’d imagined that the Taori engineer snuck looks at me while we were working. Right?
Ugh. I’d always been horrible at reading guys, which was why I’d originally taken Kann up on his offer. I’d thought that life would be easier if I could learn some of the Drexian’s smoothness. But then I’d changed my mind, so how did I end up in the Stacks getting lessons from the Blade when I’d intended to let him out of his promise?
“Not that his lessons will work anyway,” I whispered furiously to myself. “I could never play dumb.”
Okay, maybe he hadn’t told me to play dumb. But asking Zav to explain things I already understood was pretty much the same thing. The advanced engineering class might be challenging but there was nothing I found confusing. There were no questions I needed answered.
I bristled at the idea. I’d spent my entire life fighting against the assumption that female engineers weren't as capable as males. I'd endured the sidelong glances, the constant need to prove myself, the whispers that I'd only gotten this far because I was filling a quota. And now Kann wanted me to throw all that away and act like some simpering cadet who couldn't tell a power coupling from a data port?
If that was what it took to entice a guy, maybe I needed to reconsider men.
“If only it was that easy,” I muttered. “Women would be so much easier.”
Too bad I’d been born straight and had a fondness for dick, otherwise I’d forget the whole thing. As I lamented liking guys—and a Taori in particular—I reached the door to my classroom and paused at the entrance.
I’d come early so I could enact my plan, but I’d had nothing but second thoughts on my walk from the female tower. I knew I should forget about my silly crush, especially since Zav was my instructor, but another part of me wanted to see if I even had a shot. I wanted to prove it to myself—and maybe to Kann who would no doubt ask me if his advice worked—that I was desirable enough for a hot Taori.
“If you could graduate at the top of your class, you can do this,” I told myself fiercely, squaring my shoulders and stepping inside the classroom.
The lights were low and the seats leading down toward the lectern were empty. I released a breath of relief, which instantly hitched in my chest when I spotted Zav standing behind the clear podium. His focus was locked onto a device, so he hadn’t noticed me enter.
I took the moment to take him in, from his silvery striped horns that curled back and around his ears to the inked skin that peeked from beneath the cuffs of his loose shirt. Even though he was a guest instructor, he didn’t wear the Drexian Academy uniform like the rest of the teachers, and that made it possible for me to convince myself that this wasn’t the same as hitting on a regular instructor. Besides, I’d known him before he took the post as a teacher, so shouldn’t I be grandfathered in?
I shook my head at my own absurdity as I started down the steps. My hands went clammy, and I rubbed them down the fronts of my pants as I got closer.
Before I reached the bottom, Zav glanced up. Was it my imagination or was his face flushed?
“Britta.” He looked surprised but not annoyed by my early presence. Then his gaze slid behind me and he must have noticed that no one else was entering. “You are the first one here. I only arrived myself.”
I swallowed hard and forced myself to speak. “I wanted to talk with you before class started.”
He cocked his head slightly. “Oh?”
Although the Taori were known for flowery speech that verged on the confusing, Zav was not one for wasting words.
Okay, Britta, I told myself. This is it. Time to turn on the charm or turn on the cluelessness.
I stepped closer, forcing myself to keep my gaze on his crystal blue eyes even though I was sure they could see right through me. “It’s about the holochamber simulation.”
His brows knitted together. “The one created by Lieutenant Kann?”
At the mention of Kann, my face warmed. “I wanted to ask how you’re incorporating all the historical NPCs in the simulation.”
“NPCs?”
“Sorry.” I forced myself to laugh. “Old video game slang, A non-player character.” When his expression didn’t change, I added. “The Drexians who appear in the simulation and are modeled after actual individuals from the academy’s history.”
He nodded, shifting his weight from one foot to the other. “I am still working on them. Kann would like them to be as accurate as possible.”
I knew this. I also knew some ways that might help. But instead of suggesting them like I normally would, all I could think about was Kann's voice from last night. Make eye contact. Draw his attention.
I bobbed my head, holding his gaze the way Kann had showed me as I gave him my most sultry smile. As my lips quivered and I was sure my eye was going to start twitching, Zav’s face creased with concern.
"Are you all right?"
"I'm fine," I said quickly, heat crawling up my neck. Desperate to recover the situation, I tossed my hair over my shoulder —and it whipped him across the face.
He flinched and I cringed, pulling back until my hair wouldn’t let me. It was tangled in one of his horns.
“Oh, no.” I tried to yank it free but I couldn’t see how it was tangled.
“Be still.” Zav’s voice was a velvet purr as he reached up and closed a hand over mine, stilling my frantic movements. I stopped moving—stopped breathing—as he patiently worked the strands free. His fingers brushed my neck, and our faces were only inches away, making my heart pound so loud I was sure he could hear it.
This was a disaster. I officially wanted to die of mortification as he finally freed my hair.
I jumped back, mumbling my thanks as I kept my gaze on the ground.
"Are you sure you are feeling well?" he asked. "You do not seem like yourself.”
My throat closed up. "Actually, I'm not feeling great. I should probably go."
I raced up the stairs two at a time before he could respond, my scalp still stinging and my pride in even worse shape. The Taori was right. That hadn’t been me at all. What had I been thinking, trying to toss my hair like a show pony?
I burst from the room and into the corridor where the first early-bird cadets were heading to class. At least no one had seen me make a fool of myself. No one but the Taori I’d been assigned to assist while he was at the academy.
I groaned, my eyes burning with angry tears that I refused to let fall. This was all Kann's fault. That couldn’t be how he attracted females. He must have been teasing me when he’d told me to shake my ass when I walked and toss my hair. Maybe he’d even hoped I’d make an idiot of myself.
My embarrassment transformed into anger with each step. He was probably having a good laugh at how gullible I’d been. Maybe he even planned to laugh about it with Zav.
Well, he wouldn’t be laughing once I was through with him. I was going to tell him exactly what I thought of his bad, ridiculous advice. Since classes hadn’t started yet, and Kann was not the type to be early for his classes, I had a fifty-fifty shot at finding him either in his quarters getting ready or grabbing food in the staff dining room.
I rolled the dice and guessed that he was more likely to be running late and skip breakfast, practically running up the twisting steps leading to the instructors' quarters.
Before I could think better of it, my fist was pounding on his door. I dragged in a few ragged breaths as I waited, almost about to spin on my heel and head for the dining room when the door slid open.
Then my carefully prepared tirade evaporated.
I expected to find Kann getting ready, but I hadn’t been prepared for him to be in nothing but a dark towel that rode low on his hips. Moisture glistened on his bare chest, highlighting every sculpted muscle, and his hair was damp and tousled.
My mouth went dry as I stared at the half-naked Drexian. I tried to remember what I'd come to say, but my brain seemed to have short-circuited. All I could do was gape, my anger dissolving into something far more dangerous.
"Britta?" He cocked his head, and a drop of sweat traced its way down his neck to his collarbone, disappearing beneath the silver Blade pendant. “Are you okay?”
I opened my mouth, closed it, opened it again. Nothing.
Grekking hell, I was in trouble.