19. Chapter 19 - Layrin
Chapter 19
I realized what just happened, but my mind was on pause. What we did, messing around in public, was something I’d never done before, but I liked it. I liked how my normally soft, kind, and fun man leaned into being controlling and possessive. It helped my mind let go.
His breathing came out labored against my back with his head settled between my shoulder blades. His hands gripped my hips so hard I thought they might bruise. Then I heard his deep, a rough vow. “She’s ours. We’ll never let go.”
I froze, not knowing what to say to that. While it ignited something inside of me, something that had always been there, but I never let out, the logical side came knocking. It wasn't what he’d said that was alarming, but how he’d said it. The tone he used was so void of any care or thought. It was a demanding declaration of ownership that would make any normal girl run in the other direction, but this was Ravi.
My Ravi.
Shaking off those weird thoughts, I reminded myself that just this morning I said I was going to stop over analyzing things. Shoving all those worries aside, I was able to focus on what we’d just done. I definitely got fucked by Ravi in a dressing room, and I secretly wanted to do it again.
“Rav?”
His breathing became steadier even though his body stiffened. “Yes, Rin?”
My eyes snagged on the thin string coming out of his pant pocket. "I was trying those on. We definably need to pay for those."
He ripped off the tag, stuffing them deeper into his pants with a smile. "I'll pay for them. Problem fixed."
Biting my lip, I held in my smile at the situation. “I think we need to get out of here before they call the cops.” I looked down at the shredded green fabric around my feet. “And we definitely need to pay for that dress.”
His lips caressed the small of my back, and his arms squeezed tighter before releasing me. I could hear the rustle of his pants and went to grab my skirt. Feeling the mess we’d made dripping between my thighs, I was a little mad at myself for not having underwear. Would it be really terrible if I used that ripped up dress to wipe myself?
As if sensing my debate, Ravi’s hand traveled down my body with a set of napkins, and I jerked in surprise. He glanced at me through the mirror and kissed my naked shoulder. “I got you, my love. You won’t ever need anything when you're with me.”
My eyes fell into his everchanging hazel ones, hypnotized by them, while he cleaned up the mess. It was so sensual that I accidentally clamped my thighs around his hand, and he gave me an evil grin. “If only we had more time, I would ravage this body, but alas, we have more to do. Pretzels, remember?!”
Breathing through my nose, I nodded. He tucked the napkins into his pocket, scooped up all of the clothes around us, and disappeared, but not before he kissed my cheek and whispered how beautiful I was.
It took my brain a second to catch up with everything that had happened in the past twenty-four hours. While it seemed like my fantasies were coming true, I also found some things concerning. Why were they okay sharing me? I mean, I was definitely okay with being shared, but in the long run, would that work? Was I setting myself up for future heartbreak by going along with this?
I could logically chalk it up to us being in college and experimenting, that was why I’d gotten the birth control implant in my arm before I left, but I was getting the feeling it was much deeper for Rion and Ravi. The way they looked at me, touched me, it didn’t seem like a passing fling. Their eyes tracked my movements, my body, making me feel both cherished and captive. It was an odd mix, and I didn’t know if I was just making things up in my head or if there was any basis to it.
The only way I would find out was to stay with them and peel back the layers of the Ambros brothers to find out who they really were. While we had known each other since we were young, and I trusted them, we had grown up differently and might not see things the same way.
Putting on my skirt and sweatshirt, I kept going back and forth until I told myself to let it go for now. The first step was to spend more time with them, and I wanted to. While all three of them called to this carnal desire I didn't know I had, there was also a soul connection. It happened the second I saw them get out of the truck that rainy night.
Looking in the mirror for a last check to make sure I looked okay, and not like I’d just gotten fucked, I left the dressing room and found Ravi at the counter, already stuffing several bags with clothes. I was about to yell at him when I noticed he was on the phone.
“I don't have much time to talk, but I think they know something. I don't know if it was a test or an actual job, but they tried something today. I think we should go on the offensive.”
I couldn't hear who was on the other line, but it sounded serious. “No. It wasn't a full-out run on her. Do you think it was him ? I thought you had him handled?” Ravi ran a hair through his hair with a huff. “If we’re going to deal with both, it will become a much bigger problem.” He gripped the phone hard, clenching his jaw. “I refuse to say he was right. In fact, with what just happened for me, I would say he is a hundred percent wrong. We just need to be more alert, stronger. We need to show force and do it soon.”
Trying to connect the dots in my head, I couldn't shake the feeling he was talking about me , saying I was causing a problem. I just didn't know what kind of problem. He shoved the phone in his pocket and turned to the cashier who was almost done. I knew I needed to do something, so I exclaimed, “Ravi!” Stomping up to the counter, I eyed all the clothes. What the hell is he thinking?
He scooped them up, thanked the cashier, and directed me to the exit. “I couldn't very well let them have all the clothes in that room back.” I opened my mouth to tell him to return everything, but he gave me a wide-eyed puppy dog face. “They are now representations of our lovemaking, so I had to purchase them for you. Plus, you need more clothes anyway. The five outfits you rotate are not enough.”
My hands fiddled with the hem of my skirt. I hadn’t realized that he’d noticed all that. Did that mean the others had too? Looking at the floor, I mumbled, “Was it that noticeable?”
Ravi stopped, turned me, and put his forehead on mine as he cupped my cheek. “I'm sure maybe a few people had noticed, but I figured it out much, much earlier because when I'm with you, all I can see is you. All I think about is you. Nothing else matters.”
Sometimes, Ravi had this gift for making my heart stop and open up just so he could fill it with his happiness. He made me feel cherished through even the smallest of details. Examining the bags with a new set of eyes, I realized that this was his way of helping me save face as well as being loyal to me. Tipping up my head, I placed my lips right against his and said, “Then I guess I need to thank you instead of scolding you.”
He dropped all the bags, clutching me close as his face went red and his breathing mimicked running a mile at full speed. “I don't care which emotion I get from you, be it the carrot or the stick. As long as your attention is on me, I am completely fine with it.”
My body trembled at his words, and the hairs on the back of my neck stood up as a smile cracked along my face. My hand reached out to twirl his hair around my finger. “You know that sounds a little crazy, right?”
He leaned in, his whole body plastered to mine, and his arms circled around me, clutching me like he was making sure I couldn’t disappear on him. His eyes focused on my lips. “I think you can handle it.”
His kiss started off gentle, teasing, getting me to open up bit by bit, then his tongue swiped across mine, causing my body to heat up. My arms lifted on their own, pulling him to me just as much as he was pulling me. As soon as I gave just as much as I got, the kiss took a turn, becoming more explorative, greedier.
While he was keeping my mouth busy, his arms circled my thighs and lifted me, pulling my legs around him. His kiss deepened, intoxicating and overwhelming. I knew we were in public, but that awareness faded with his whole attention on me.
At that moment, I knew I was in trouble. Something was off about how fast and deep I was falling, but I shoved the knowledge into the back of my mind. I was finding it hard to care because deep down, I was just as problematic.
I wanted to bask in their attention. I wanted to feel loved and wanted. I wanted to be needed so that maybe, possibly, I wouldn’t be alone anymore.
He took me back home and unloaded the clothes. That was when I realized I couldn't take all of this back to the dorm by myself. When I worked up the courage to tell him that I might need to take the clothes back in stages, he laughed and said most of them would stay at their place.
Then he ran up the stairs, threw all of his clothes out of his dresser, and grinned, telling me this dresser was now mine. I fought with him for another twenty minutes about how wrong that was, but he wasn't having it. He just folded the clothes, nodding the whole time, and put them into the dresser, while his cloths were shoved in a pile in the corner. He let me vent it all out until I was blue in the face, and when I finished, he got up, kissed me silly, and told me this didn't change a thing. He wanted his room to basically be my room too.
That was when Rion came in and proposed a schedule to make sure I switched what room I stayed in whenever I stayed over. Ravi argued against the proposal with flared nostrils, baring his teeth like he was an animal protecting his meat, until Rion reminded him that we all deserved one-on-one time with each other. Ravi caved after that, his only caveat being that my clothes would stay in his room. I didn't say a word, just letting them talk because I was still fascinated with how easily it was going for them to share me. I was either one of the luckiest girls on the planet, or the dumbest.
Ravi offered to take me back to my dorm, but I politely refused. On the chance that Cin was back, I didn't want to roll up with “Ambros.” She would just grill me about it. I grabbed a few of the clothes, put them back into the store bag, and took it with me. This way, I had an alibi.
Rion and Ravi were at the door, each of them giving me a kiss goodbye. It was awkward to kiss them in front of each other, but neither said anything or acted weird, so I just went with it. Roux was over by the stairs, and he gave me a simple nod when I waved. Ravi and Rion had said that all three of them were willing to share me, but Roux had consistently kept his distance. Maybe the “ours” they were talking about was just them two.
Shaking that off, I got into the Uber and went back to my dorm. It was by pure luck that Cin showed up fifteen minutes after I got back. She immediately saw my bag and gushed about wanting to go shopping with me next time. My mind recalled the memories of what I had done on my shopping trip, and my face got hot as I told her that I would definitely go with her next time. It would be a much different kind of trip.
When I asked about how stuff with her family had gone, her face fell and she quietly mumbled about how it was the “same old shit.” A minute later, I learned that meant an argument with her mother and brothers. When I asked about Elio, she laughed, saying that he was good and it was the first time the two of them had ever mutually disagreed with the family.
When I tried to probe for more details, she brushed me off, saying that it wasn't a big deal and she could handle herself. She quickly changed subjects, asking how my meeting with “the Ambros boy” went, and I told her the truth—I was really starting to enjoy him and his fresh perspective on life.
After another warning lecture, I walked up to her, grabbed her shoulders, and said, “Cin, I really like you. I want to be friends with you. I think you're a loyal, badass person that truly has my back, but he also has the same complaints about you and your family.” Her whole body stiffened and her eyes narrowed. “But I told him what I am telling you now.” I took a deep breath. “Whoever I choose to be friends with is my choice. You can advise me and tell me your thoughts, but in the end, it will always be my choice. I need you to respect that.”
She looked like her head was about to explode, so I calmly followed with, “And if I get burned, I would hope that you, as my friend, would be there to help me pick up the pieces.” When her lips pursed, I smiled. “And maybe come up with a revenge plan.”
It took her a second before her face relaxed. Laughing hard, she belted out, her fist in the sky, “Now, that's what I'm talking about! Revenge sisters!”
After that, we watched a scary movie, which we wound up laughing at, an action movie that we complained about, and a romance, which we pretended to complain about but got sucked in so hard that afterwards we gushed about how amazing the main guy would be if he were real. It was a fantastic girls night.
When Sunday came around, I woke up to a string of texts. Ravi had made a group chat with me and his brothers, which made me giddy and smiley all day. I had a lot of schoolwork to catch up on, so I stayed in for the day, bouncing between texting them back and doing work.
I was surprised to get an email from my English professor saying that instead of coming to class on Monday, we were to meet up with our partners and come up with an outline to submit to him by Wednesday morning. Not two minutes after I read the email, I got a text from Elio. This time, I took the reins. The library was a safe and public location that was most definitely not a date. A couple of the text bubbles popped up then went away a few times until I received a text saying he would meet me there.
Monday morning, Cin laughed in my face when I asked for directions to the library. “Why the hell would I go there when I have the internet?”
Packing my bag, I huffed, “Well, I’m supposed to meet Elio there, and I don't want to be late.”
Cin immediately jerked back around, her eyes doubling in size. “What? He’s never been to the library! I would be surprised to learn he even knew how to read.”
Rolling my eyes, I put my hand on my hip and shook my finger. “That's not nice, Cin.” She shrugged, picking at her fingernails and mumbling that he was her idiot cousin.
“Anyways,” I called out, putting my backpack on, “I can figure it out.” With no help from Cin, who claimed she’d never cracked open the "student thing", I found the student handbook in a drawer, and it had a map.
We walked out with each other, agreeing to meet up in Art History, and went in opposite directions. My first stop was to get some coffee, and while I was in line, I got a text from Ravi.
Ravi: Good morning, my beautiful and stunning Rin
I bit my lip to keep from full-out gushing and typed back.
Rin: Morning, boys. Hope you have an awesome day.
Rion: Where are you going to meet with Elio today?
Several pings came after that text.
Ravi: What the hell?
Ravi: Why are you meeting him?
Ravi: He doesn't deserve any of ur time.
Roux: Meeting him alone?
Ravi: What?! Hell no!
I typed as quickly as I could, not wanting Ravi to run off the deep end.
Rin: We’re meeting 2day at the library cuz class turned into a meeting for our project.
Ravi: Project?! Who was going to ever tell me about this?
Ravi: I’m blaming Rion cuz Rin can do no wrong
Rion: Blame the professor.
Ravi: And why didn't you stop it??????
The barista called up the next customer, so I moved to the counter, sending off one last text.
Rin: Getting coffee now. Talk to you guys later
Shoving my phone into my pocket, I ordered and paid for my coffee. Once I got it, I headed for the library. It was interesting to see this building because on the map it said Labs/Library, and I couldn't figure out how that worked.
As soon as I entered the four-story building, I saw an elevator with large gold letters over it that spelled “Library.” Since no one was around to ask, I got into the elevator. I mean, what's the worst that could happen? As the doors closed, I looked around and noticed it only had one button. Lifting my brow in hesitation, I shrugged my shoulders and pressed it. The machine jerked to life, and I put out my hands to steady myself while it creaked its way down. Maybe this was the wrong choice to make.
All too quickly, I was jolted by the sudden stop, eyeing my coffee to make sure it didn't spill, when the doors whooshed open. Once I stepped out, my eyes adjusted to the artificial light of the room, roaming over rows and rows of books as far as I could see. Libraries weren’t foreign to me, I’d frequented them to go on the internet, but this was like a dragon’s underground horde of books.
I looked around like a lost deer, realizing that I didn't know how I was going to even find Elio.
“Can I help you, dear?”
A small, frail woman with glasses stood behind an old beaten-up rosewood desk. While her outer appearance was of an old woman, her eyes held the sparkle of youth in them.
I drifted closer to her, hesitant because I saw no other students. The place had a silence that spoke volumes. “Um…” I focused on her smirk of a smile. “I was going to meet my project partner here. Is there a spot for something like that?”
She pointed off to the right, and I looked down the aisle, seeing only rows and rows of bookshelves. “Follow this aisle all the way to the end then make a right. There’s a small section with tables and chairs that students use for that purpose.”
“Thanks.” I looked down and then back at her with a raised brow, and she flicked her fingers to encourage me to keep going.
I walked down, going for what felt like miles, not once running into another person. This place had an odd feeling of secrecy and whispers in the dark corners where the light couldn’t touch.
Finally, when I met a wall, I turned right. There was a bright light at the end of the rows, like a long shadow-filled tunnel with the sun at the end, calling you to keep going.
When I finally got to the end, there was a set of stairs. Taking them two at a time, feeling like I was coming out of a forest and into a field, I was met with so much light I had to cover my eyes. The small nook contained about five tables of four, scattered around a landing that had a whole wall of solid glass at ground level. It was a breath of fresh air in this cold, dusty tomb.
“There you are, sweets.”
Turning my head, I noticed a halo of red and gold rays, partnered with emerald jewels that looked like he was made from the sun. I stumbled my way over, and his jackal of a smile appeared across his face.
“Don’t tell me you're afraid of the dark.” Glaring at him, I set my bag and coffee down as he leaned forward. “‘Tis just a dusty old place full of books.”
It felt like he was dissing said books, and the need to defend them rose within me. “Knowledge is power.”
His eyes flashed with a glint of respect before he put his head down and chuckled. “Aye, ‘tis true. I can’t argue with that one.”
Pulling out my notebook, I opened my mouth to start to talk about the project, but he interrupted. “So, what have you been doing while I was gone? Playing with the Ambros boy?”
I sighed, raising my head to face him. His demeanor was relaxed and lazy, his arms draped on the chair and his trademark smile on full display, but his eyes gave way to the simmering rage beneath. I needed to tread lightly.
“He is my mentor, so we have regular meetings.” I left it at that and opened my notebook.
“Sure, sure, but where do you go with him? Not someplace fancy, right? I thought you didn't like fancy places.” His question was odd, but I felt like I was going to get nowhere until his curiosity was satisfied.
“Nope. Just coffee shops and such. Nothing fancy and nothing like a date.” This time, I gave him a pointed look, and he had the decency to blush and look away for a second, clearing his throat. It wasn't a lie….
“Good. Good.” His lip twitched before he pulled out his notebook and asked, “He didn't say anything weird, huh?”
Ah, so this was what he was really after. It was why he kept looking away, not wanting me to know he was more interested in these answers than the others. “Nope. Nothing weird. Just warned me about the Ricci family.”
He jumped up, scaring me so badly I picked up my pen and shot up with him, handling it like it was a weapon and not just a writing tool. Elio’s normally controlled chaos took on a wild and dangerous edge that made me take a step back.
“What the fuck did that asshole say about us? What secrets is he spillin?”
“Secrets? I don't know anything about that, but he did say your family was dangerous. Cin said the same thing about Ambros, so I told both of them that I was going to be friends with whoever I chose. You can hear the same message. If you don’t like that, then you’re not being my friend.”
His breathing calmed down, that anger cooling as my words sunk in, then he looked around as if realizing where he was. He shook his head, looking down at the ground as he mumbled, “I’m sorry, Layrin. I just… I lost it for a second, and I shouldn't have.”
Glancing at my hand, he took another breath before his shoulders slumped in a kind of defeat. “Fuck, I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean to frighten you.”
I carefully set the pen down, keeping my eyes on him. He blew out another ragged breath, “Fuck. I fucked this up, didn’t I?”
“I guess that depends on what you mean.” My voice grew steadier once I saw the Elio I knew come back to the surface.
He nodded to his notebook and sat down. In an even tone, he said, “What kind of business did you want to start? I know you already have ideas.” His smile came back, but it was more wary, less confident.
If he wanted to let it go, then I could do that. Sitting down, I explained my first idea. It was called Compybot. It was a robot that would be available for purchase or hourly rental to be your friend. We would program it to act and think like a human, putting in textbook psychology and real-world scenarios to help lonely people who were in need of some company.
Elio was all for it, coming up with some adjustments and marketing slogans. After we worked out an outline, he nodded toward a set of bookshelves. “Over there are the psychology books, and on the opposite side is mechanics. Why don't you find a couple psychology books you like, and I’ll find some mechanical ones to give the project that real-world feel.”
It was a good idea, so I went with it. Going down the dark aisle, I was looking over all of the books, engrossed with finding some that would help the bot learn how to empathize with a human as well as give solid therapeutic advice. I got the eerie feeling again but shoved it away, knowing that Elio was a few aisles down and over.
I had plucked out one of the books, reading about the philosophy of humanity and the fear of being alone, when I heard one loud thunk, then another, then another. I didn't understand what was going on until I heard a desperate call of my name, then the bookshelf in front of me was leaning overhead, about to flatten me like a pancake.
A flash of a body appeared, boxing itself around me as heavy books rained down, pelting me and whoever had saved me. When the bookshelf started to come down, I gasped.
“Get down.” I immediately followed the command, covering my head. There was a grunt before he whispered, “I won't let them hurt you.”
Looking up, I saw Elio was shielding me, his teeth locked in a grimace, trying to keep the heavy bookcase from crushing us. I scrambled out from under him, pushing at the bookcase with all my might. Finally, some young man showed up, eyes wide, and the three of us managed to push the bookshelf off Elio.
The librarian was furious, glaring at us like this was all our fault, but I knew it wasn't. I grabbed both my and Elio’s things. Shouldering our bags, I put his arm around me and helped him limp his way to the elevator.
Once we were inside, I couldn't help the words that spilled out. “Why, Elio? Why did you save me? You could’ve been hurt worse than this!”
He gave a pained chuckle, wheezing out, “You could’ve too, and I wasn't willing to take that chance.” He winked at me, but the teasing expression became a pained grimace. I was sure his back was on fire, so I told him I needed to get him to the nurse’s office fast.
“No, take me to the Alpha Sigma Xi house. We have better care there.” I held back from rolling my eyes because of course they had their own private care on campus. Rich kids.
It took me a while to get him over to the house. As soon as Luca answered the door, he was cursing up a storm, calling Elio an idiot. Luca barely glanced at me when Elio turned around and blew me a kiss. “Thank you, my sweets. I promise it will go smoother next time.”
I chuckled. “Sure. Yeah. Right now, we're zero for two. Not good odds.”
Luca, who was shoving him inside, called out over his shoulder, “That means there’s only more of a possibility for it to go up.”
I chuckled against my hand, turning away just as Luca jogged down the house steps. “Hey, Layrin. Thank you for helping him home. It means… something.”
I nodded in acceptance, getting the idea that Luca didn't like doing feelings or thank yous. “See ya around, Luca.” I felt his eyes on me as I walked away, totally drained.
What a day.